When the Darkness Falls

The moon
The moon | Source

When Darkness falls

.

Some days are dark,

It seems everythings black.

That's when I know,

My depressions back.


Why am I here?

was it some mistake?

Hurting myself is what,

my loved ones fear.


I can get so sad,

I just can't move.

Everyday it's not good,

In fact it's really bad.


They say we all,

have a reason to be.

My depressions so black,

I feel really really small.


Days are bad, some are good,

This is my world.

I carry on as I should,

I just do the best I could.


People do not know,

they don't understand.

That my dark days,

leave me feeling so low.


I can't explain how I feel,

A huge black mass.

I know it's my life,

Dark days are trying to steal.


I make it through,

I don't know how.

Some how I do,

the darkness is true.


How can one feel so bad,

some days I just feel like,

everything in my world,

Is just too sad.


I hope with therapy,

It'll help it get better,

I have so many,

that love and care for me.


To understand those like me,

you really have to try..

we hate the way we feel,

Most people though can't see..


I don't want to be here,

I truly see no point.

yet I stay day after day,

It's my illness I fear.


I'm good to others,

God wants me to be.

I don't like myself,

My loved one that bothers.


Someday I pray,

I will get better.

That this will go away,

For now, I'm here to stay.


The darkness is really here,

I get really really dark,

sitting there with me

until it's for my life I fear.


I battle the dark everyday,

Sometimes alone I can't.

The darkness is too much,

Help me make it go away.

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Comments 8 comments

Rusti Mccollum profile image

Rusti Mccollum 4 years ago from Lake Oswego, Oregon Author

Thankyou.I came forward in hopes of helping someone get help for thiers.


crazybeanrider profile image

crazybeanrider 4 years ago from Washington MI

Written from the inside of depression, seeing it is almost impossible, but your hub shows what an ugly sorrowful state of depression can be, well written and insightful.


Rusti Mccollum profile image

Rusti Mccollum 4 years ago from Lake Oswego, Oregon Author

Barnsey, We are in thistogether. People with out it don't understand,why you can't get out of bed, or sleep so much. They don't understand our state of mind. To them it's simple,just get up,they have no idea and cannot under state the feeling of hopelesness and despair.I hope you find peace ans me, I'll keep looking. They say dark depression is hard to ever get over in life. You are right about everything you said.Thankyou I'm sure your comment will help people as well. Best wishes my friend


Barnsey profile image

Barnsey 4 years ago from Happy Hunting Grounds

Sometimes during depression we huddle in the darkest corner and peer out at the world as if we were alone. Just turn your head to the left and then the right, there, do you see them? Those shapes in the darkness are not just shadows, no. They are others just like you and me, you were never alone, we are all in this together. Remembering that has helped me and I hope it helps you and everyone else out there, great poem Rusti!


Rusti Mccollum profile image

Rusti Mccollum 4 years ago from Lake Oswego, Oregon Author

Thank you I too used to drink but it got worse. I needed some kind of crutch. Now I use writing to try to curb that. I am currently composing a poem about the light leaving your eyes, We all know how that feels.I wish you luck billy,if you need a friend or someone to help I am here.


Rusti Mccollum profile image

Rusti Mccollum 4 years ago from Lake Oswego, Oregon Author

Thankyou.I find if I write whats going through my head,it's theraputic. I'm in therapy as well as on medication. When I wrote that last night , I had a period of severe darkness. You wrote a beautiful comment thank you.I hope you get better too, I know your footsteps,mine are walking next to yours,hugs.


billybuc profile image

billybuc 4 years ago from Olympia, WA

I have several people in my life who suffer from depression and I can only tell you that when I am drinking, when alcohol has a grip on me, I feel somewhat like you described. The complete absence of light in my life is the best way I can describe it; the complete absence of hope. It is all-consuming and there is no remedy for me.

Something in me would not allow me to quit; I am a survivor and so are you and I admire you for writing this wonderful poem.

bill


kashmir56 profile image

kashmir56 4 years ago from Massachusetts

Hi Rusti, this is such a beautifully written poem,i think everyone battles with those days when we are feeling very low and lost in the darkness of despair . But i think we just got to keep fighting and praying that this darkness and despair will pass and we won't have these feeling and thoughts any more. I hope you win the battle and defeat the darkness .Wishing you all the best my friend and keeping you in my thoughts and prayers .

Vote up and more !!!

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