When You Raped Me
When you raped me~
It was not sexual in nature~
But still treatment in a violent way~
In an abusive holding horrible stay!
Did you know how deep you hurt me? ~
Did you know I did not want to live on? ~
Did you know how much of me you depleted? ~
As you pillaged and plundered every aspect of my life wrong?
There was not just one of you~
Yet many from all angles~
I felt shackled~
My very life in your hands~
My neck strung~
As my body dangled.
My head whirled at times~
I gasped for air within the struggle~
I fought till I could fight no more~
Till I in fetal position felt I lost the battle. ~
Finally my rescuers found me~
As they forcefully opened my door~
Finding my very being had atrophied~
Malnourished, thin, as I felt the world me deplored.
I was collected~
All of me~
I was swooped up~
By my loving parents you see.
I vowed now I was back in the womb~
That I would never venture out again~
Perchance I would meet a worse doom~
As I healed cleansing of acquaintances~
I kept few friends~
As I went back and forth from surviving and wasted.
Oh! How I prayed~
Kneeling on natures alter! ~
Oh! How I cried as I walked the Stations of the Cross! ~
Oh! How I delighted when I finally heard GOD’S WORD while~
Walking on the Labyrinth~
Giving me hope~
Feeling I had a rebirth!
I carried pictures of people who loved me~
On a clip board every where I went~
With the words of Philippians three~
Thirteen through fourteen~
As a constant reminder to me~
As I shrunken felt spent from thee.
For my troubled times of loss~
I read over and over again~
“Brethren, I count not myself to have apprehended:
But this one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind, and reaching forth unto those things which are before, I press toward the mark for the prize of the high calling of GOD in CHRIST JESUS.” Amen ~
I fought to make sure this~
Was not my very end! ~
Years passed with tears and prayers~
From endless loss~
Alone often I was~
Stressed to go on. ~
Every inch an effort~
Every minute a toil~
As I continued with great labor~
I saw the light at the end of the tunnel!
Oh! Yes! ~
I still feel the loss~
I still feel your evil doings~
Yet I block it out~
I with the LORDS help~
I move on~
As I continue to now~
Truly live beyond!