Why some Guys or Men are Bad in Bed

Hear this possible Hypocrite

mumble anew a verse perverse

a fault to adjure

lets say what the fault

of men in bed is

they need what they need

a fire to quence

a desire for their love'd one's closeness

perhaps for company alone

but t'is almost always their need

that brings them there.


Once they are done

thats it, its all over

they leave their lover unrequited

unless the beded need what he needs

they have left desire.


Most women don't understand

why they have unrequited desire

resort to their toys

seek pleasure alone

t's the man's fault I swear

that this is done.


This act of purity

Godliness and fire

is meant for more

then to just slake desire

'tis a union of souls

if anyone dares

to seek each other

in solitude and share

a bit of one's self but

also to feel for the other

to grow in simpathy

not feed one's self


What is wrong

in this world gone mad

when men turn their

wives into whores

then wonder at why

they cant tell the difference

'tween their wife

and the one they have on the side.


Now decry me if you dare

I probably have said enough

It is my anger

you hear and not a bluff.

Why It matters to me

I cant rightly say

but I say what I feel

and it is enough

that I must say it.

More by this Author


Comments 31 comments

vietnamvet68 profile image

vietnamvet68 6 years ago from New York State

sound like you have not met the right man, believe me we are all not like the one you describe.Some of us like to please our wives also. Great Poem though, I voted you up across the board.


SilentReed profile image

SilentReed 6 years ago from Philippines

The emphasis on sexual performance is given too much credit. Love is more than physical attraction. It is creation's sublime union of man and woman.


Jaggedfrost profile image

Jaggedfrost 6 years ago Author

The fact that I am a Man making these observations from talking to women makes this a bit awkward.

Silent you are right and this was meant to agree with you.


Micky Dee profile image

Micky Dee 6 years ago

I wish I could have been more of what the other part of me needed.


Jaggedfrost profile image

Jaggedfrost 6 years ago Author

I am sure a lot of men would sympathize. When I found out that only 20 percent of women reported they they had complete satisfaction in their relationship back before I was even interested I resolved to be part of that twenty percent. I cant say that I have always been there but that has been my goal. Considering my Lady has gone to hell and back with me a few times I must be doing something right but not always.


Dave Mathews profile image

Dave Mathews 6 years ago from NORTH YORK,ONTARIO,CANADA

A part of the problem lies in the fact that the woman seems to think that her man is a mind reader and should instinctively know what she desires, her hungers, her needs, her passions, without opening her mouth, or saying a word.

Your man needs instruction and encouragement inorder to provide for your needs, and he also needs you to be willing to reciprocate in many things too and be willing to permit experimentation with unconventional pleasures too like food play.

Most women have certain hot spots, where a touch or a kiss would drive her into a wildness like no other, but does she convey this to her man, usually no.

The fact that women sometimes choose to fake excitement and pleasure either during fore-play or having sex, is also not right, for it sends a false signal to her man.


Jaggedfrost profile image

Jaggedfrost 6 years ago Author

As a Man, I know what I need and often I get it if I am a little observant and ask questions when I don't expect anything in return. The price of being the husband my wife needs is constant vigilance.


Fossillady profile image

Fossillady 5 years ago from Saugatuck Michigan

Everybody has their own unique experience in the matter, but as a rule, I think you're on to something and that would make you a good lover, now wouldn't it! Stirring poetry!


Jaggedfrost profile image

Jaggedfrost 5 years ago Author

lol If every man were guilty of this, we would be in a lot worse shape as a society then we already are. I will plead the fifth on my own prowess. I am glad it stirred you.


Nellieanna profile image

Nellieanna 5 years ago from TEXAS

Your poem has clarity and practicality. Each gender has a need to be responsive to the needs of the other; it is a mutual need if any mutual experience is to be enjoyed; else it is not a mutual experience they'll share but some sort of sad - or tiresome - dutiful or self-serving occurrence like having to pull potatoes in order to have potato salad. One could starve or worse - never know the pleasure of tasting!


Jaggedfrost profile image

Jaggedfrost 5 years ago Author

lol yes you are right unfortunately in my research it would seem that women on the whole end up giving more then men. It is sad to say that about my own sex but it is true. I believe that this trend is the reason for a rise in materialism in women. If they cant get satisfaction at least they will make sure they have a bank account that suits their needs.


Nellieanna profile image

Nellieanna 5 years ago from TEXAS

That's entirely possible, although deprivation in bed may be only one facet of it, considering that it is possibly the first generation of women allowed to the material table to participate as full-fledged partakers, so more than one frustration may have been unleashed. It's obvious that the feast does not satisfy the real needs, but we may as well be thorough if attributing causes for frustration leading to gluttony at the materialistic table.

It may well be that both genders suffer that ungratified and possibly unidentified hunger for real love. Frequently there is mutual dissatisfaction which may account for why men may seek to assuage theirs in the beds of other women with different "gifts" to offer and different rewards expected for giving them. Whetherl it satisfies that hunger I have no idea. But the evidence that it is a rising alternative is inescapable.

I suspect that both genders have a huge ungratified craving for simple real recognition & appreciation of who they really are, - as some say, "warts and all" -


Jaggedfrost profile image

Jaggedfrost 5 years ago Author

Oh I admit that I am biased even if I comprehend the flaws to which each gender is prone. I expect more from my own though. I will leave you to be an authority on the other subject and write its book end if you dare.


Nellieanna profile image

Nellieanna 5 years ago from TEXAS

I strongly suspect that one is destined to be biased in some degree or another within one's own more familiar arena, whether it be gender, race, beliefs or any other of one's own natural biases. In a way, if it is a matter of choice, we wouldn't choose it if we didn't prefer it and if it is a fact of our genetics, if we are to function well within our own reality, we need to like and prefer being it.

Was the focus here on flaws? Did I mistake it for a straightforward effort to probe and to better understand an inherent problem of communicating each of their needs between genders so that they could be more happily met for the mutual benefit?

Thanks for granting me leave to be an authority on an unspecified "other subject" and to write its book, but I seek neither being an authority nor the leave to be.

If I were to write a book it would probably attempt to be less, not more subjective in its perspective.


sligobay profile image

sligobay 5 years ago from east of the equator

This was an ambitious poem from the outset. To assume the vantage of the opposite sex and then presume to recognize its anger toward the male gender with the bias of our own experience and inexperience is somewhat akin to a fish giving flight instruction to a ferret. LOL. The poem is good but the exchange of comments is precious.


Jaggedfrost profile image

Jaggedfrost 5 years ago Author

Nellieanna, empathy as a personal trait sometimes makes you a stranger to the subjects that should be native to you. I have studied all my life to be a lover of women. The fact that I am monogamous in my practice is almost beside the point. You don't have to be an authority but your objective way of seeing life left me with the impression that you were.

Sligobay, you are right, it was ambitious. I admit that it was odd and still is for me to profess what I do and not be of the gender I seem to favor in my work. I didn't know however that my wife and I were that different in genus or species or you and I being that different by the same token.


sligobay profile image

sligobay 5 years ago from east of the equator

Touche', Jaggedfrost. I meant only praise and no criticism at your poetic ambition. I read a poem by a soldier on hubpages that details the fear and agony of taking another's life in battle and carrying those forfeit lives in a knapsack for the balance of his. There was no ambition, only truth. One of our prolific Hub Poets wrote recently of the missing and assumed one subject's place in an unmarked concealed grave. That was an ambitious theme. Poetry would be nowhere without ambition. I hope that my levity was not lost on you. I am a fish 'out of water' when I am ambitious, sometimes. When I find the ferret on dry land, I am two levels from direct experience. When I 'wax poetic' about the avian experience of flight, I am three levels removed from direct experience and I have entered the realm of fantasy. Fantasy is fine and it is fun. Fantasy only masquerades as reality but does not pretend to be reality. Polemical prose is something else entirely. My comments are mostly visceral reaction and rarely seek to roost on intellectual plateaus. Your wife, you and I are all the same. We traverse the globe on two legs with heads full of data and thoughts seeking expression.


Neil Sperling profile image

Neil Sperling 5 years ago from Port Dover Ontario Canada

Oh my - could it be the lady has not yet found the right chap?

Well done poem just the same.


Nellieanna profile image

Nellieanna 5 years ago from TEXAS

JF - I admire your attentiveness to the loving of women - or, obviously focusing on a woman, who - as you say - has been to hell and back with you, proving that you do things right overall. I am most empathetic with that.

To both love and relate to another human being, especially one with opposite, though complementary, characteristics - as in gender,- is certainly a high calling and when well done, deserves high praise and recognition!

I'm not sure which gender is more challenging to the other, but I've always been glad I didn't have to learn to relate to women in that kind of relationship! I like women, but we are possibly not so easy to live with when there are emotions involved, as in a marriage - myself excepted, of course - hahaha! ;-) Of course it all very much depends on who each partner is, individually as well.

Your good opinion of me is appreciated.


Jaggedfrost profile image

Jaggedfrost 5 years ago Author

Sligo perhaps in this case reality is masquerading as fantasy. i am more of a teacher then a poet for poetry sake,

Neil Sperling, Any woman who gets attached to an insensitive man has chosen incorrectly though such things happen anyhow.

Nellieanna, For me, understanding the other sex is the highest acheivement that i have ever aspired to. Next to that everything else in my life often feels like nonsense. i wrote this poem in the hope that i could plant the seed of change in my sex and express the other point of view from women as i have experience with them in a way so that perhaps my own gender might take the next step.


Nellieanna profile image

Nellieanna 5 years ago from TEXAS

That is a most high and admirable aspiration, JF. I sense it is deeply felt. How do you feel it is progressing?


Neil Sperling profile image

Neil Sperling 5 years ago from Port Dover Ontario Canada

Yes they do - that's what I said in one of my hubs too.... It happens till they break the cycle, wake up and shine their light where it wont go to waste.


Jaggedfrost profile image

Jaggedfrost 5 years ago Author

Nellieanna, I have my wife pretty much figured out. I had to go through the process twice since things changed when I lost my mind as it were for almost a year even though the after shocks lasted much longer then that. It feels slightly unfaithful to use the same tact with women in general I usually use with my wife to figure her out though at work I figure that it is a matter of survival to do so. I don't have any problems with women at work. It has been an astounding success.

Neil Sperling, I have found, that if you show the women around you the respect they deserve that happens a lot quicker. Sometimes I feel like a schmuck for doing it to the men who then have to walk up to my example but only for a few minutes a day... once in a while.


Neil Sperling profile image

Neil Sperling 5 years ago from Port Dover Ontario Canada

I Believe it all depends on the level of love a person can radiate. There are women who need lessons from you on how to respect a man as well. Unconditional love is not very common, but is what we are here in the world to learn.


Jaggedfrost profile image

Jaggedfrost 5 years ago Author

The biggest part of love and teaching anyone anything is agency my friend. Without respecting agency there is no love, only dominion and dominance.


attemptedhumour profile image

attemptedhumour 5 years ago from Australia

Hi Jaggedfrost, I managed to get the drift of this one, a clever way to point out a universal truth. We men know what is required, but delivering is the age old problem. The majority of us fall short and that's why the problem exists. Cheers


Jaggedfrost profile image

Jaggedfrost 5 years ago Author

lol I am glad you know what is required. I can't actually say that about men in general. Try to broach that subject at your next male social gathering and see what reactions you get.


Nan Mynatt profile image

Nan Mynatt 5 years ago from Illinois

Sex is a partnership and unless you realize the fullest potential of the relationship you will not have the full fillment that both of you long for. Sex is an art, some of us paint better others.


Jaggedfrost profile image

Jaggedfrost 4 years ago Author

I quite agree with you there Nan. And learning to paint is a discipline that takes time. I am all about prodding people to take that time.

lol I have been very busy of late. My wife has decided to take classes at an Adult exercise gym. She is studying ballet and silks at the moment but she wants to try pole. I have taken up silks too to support her at first. Now it is kinda crazy how much I am enjoying the challenge. I am struggling to get off the ground.


Brighton 23 months ago

Hello Mam, Some years ago I had a VERY vivid dream that I was flying very high above the earth on the back of a White Eagle. I felt ver calm and safe and peufceal. Out perched on its wing to my right as we were soaring was a Black Vulture calmly sitting there. Can you shed light on any meaning to me? I have had dreams a few more times over the years similar to this and wonder if this should mean something to me ..Thank You for any Help .Jeff


Jaggedfrost profile image

Jaggedfrost 9 months ago Author

Jeff, could you clarify your spelling a bit? I would also need sensory details you haven't provided.

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