Women need a reason to have sex. Men just need a place. -- Billy Crystal
"I drink to forget but never forget to drink."
"He who laugh last doesn't get the joke."
"Success is relative - More the success more the relatives."
"Change is inevitable.......except from vending machines."
"Bills travel through the mail at twice the speed of checks."
~I've stopped drinking, but only while I'm asleep. ~George
I think that should be enough to make your day.:)