Divorce: A Poem

A Fallen Angel

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My heart is broken Courtesy of Flickr
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Best done in a corner Courtesy of Flickr
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Hide this from the world Courtesy of Flickr

Divorce Sucks

 You asked for a Divorce

I said, "We can make it work."

You said, "We've done that before."

I said, "Let's try just once more."

I don't wanna do it anymore

 

A boob I have been

playing a game I could never win

the stakes are so high

when I think of them

it makes me cry

 

I hide in lonely solitude

crying over my loss of you

how could I have been such a fool

no longer knowing what to do.

 

In the corner I stand

now less of a man

down my face they stream

In a haze, thinking

It's just a dream.

 

But it is not

the tears are real

running free, wet and hot

til at last I can't breathe

you have walked away with such ease.

 

I wipe my eyes

and come out of my corner

ready to face the world

and tell them all my lies.

 

To myself as well

I tell the best

don't worry about me,

all is swell.

 

Someday I'll wake up

from my self induced jest

when I realize

you are here no more.

Authors Note

 Thank you goes to Brenda Scully who has always gently prodded me to not be ashamed and share my poems.  When I started this two poems ago, I felt like my poems were stupid at best.  It is because of the wonderful people on hubpages like Brenda who have inspired and encouraged me to share.  Everyone here is so supportive on the creative cycle that I find this to be my second home.  Thank you

Copyright 2009 by Wesley Cox

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Comments 51 comments

I*n*v*i*c*t*u*s profile image

I*n*v*i*c*t*u*s 7 years ago

Oh Wesley, I can feel your pain. It is a daunting feeling to be where you are and I am soo sorry to here. I remember so clearly your beautiful love story..it feels like yesterday. I admire your ability to express your pain into a poem. Something I can't ever find myself able to do well.

I have been through a divorce and it is so cutting and feels like the pain and displaced feelings won't ever go away at first, yet in time it will. You are very talented and I am grateful to have met you here..You are amongst friends and you have my blessings with you for a healed heart and new beginnings! Take care. {big hugs}


myownworld profile image

myownworld 7 years ago from uk

this was beautiful...I loved the 4th stanza the most...never stop writing...!


wesleycox profile image

wesleycox 7 years ago from Back in Texas, at least until August 2012 Author

Invictus: Thank you so much for your kind words, the love story was an attempt to remind her that I will never forget the beauty of our meeting, and of the new love we had found. Funny though is how people who don't show emotion externally can put it into words the easiest. Thank you once more for the note of acceptance.

Myownworld: Thank you as well, and I shall never stop writing. I love it too much.


wrenfrost56 profile image

wrenfrost56 7 years ago from U.K.

Great poem wesley, very heartfelt and emotional.


PirateGirl 7 years ago

Wow man the Cabin Girl stands and applauds this moving and emotional Poem. Without doubt one of the best poems I have read on here, just beautiful !


ralwus 7 years ago

As well a job as any other done on these pages. Very moving indeed Wes. You are really stretching and getting it 'down'. But I hope this one is not a view of what is current in your life right now. Thanks Wes a really good poem from the heart. I shed a tear also.


wesleycox profile image

wesleycox 7 years ago from Back in Texas, at least until August 2012 Author

Wrenfrost: Thank you very much, I put what I had in it.

PirateGirl: Your praise humbles me. I am honored that you feel this way.

Ralwus: Thank you and unfortunately it is a reflection of current events. Thank you for your praise as it means a lot to me.


manlypoetryman profile image

manlypoetryman 7 years ago from (Texas !) Boldly Writing Poems Where No Man Has Gone Before...

"Ouch" on the subject of the Poem...Your poetry skills are exceptional. Sorry to hear that sad circumstances were the motivation for this one. Welcome to the up and down world of Poetry. Enjoy the ride...It's a wild one. And I agree with ralwus...this one was done as well as any here!


wesleycox profile image

wesleycox 7 years ago from Back in Texas, at least until August 2012 Author

Thank you so much MPM, I greatly appreciate your kind words.


Jess Killmenow profile image

Jess Killmenow 7 years ago from Nowheresville, Eastern United States

Thank you for sharing this heartfelt poem, Wesley.


wesleycox profile image

wesleycox 7 years ago from Back in Texas, at least until August 2012 Author

Your welcome, and thanks for visiting.


shamelabboush profile image

shamelabboush 7 years ago

Oh, this is so touching wesley :( Very sad ending... Thanks for sharing.


wesleycox profile image

wesleycox 7 years ago from Back in Texas, at least until August 2012 Author

shamelaboush: Thank you for visiting and commenting, I greatly appreciate it.


\Brenda Scully 7 years ago

A STAR IS BORN.......

SO SORRY TO HEAR OF YOUR sad story, but you are strong, and young, and a brilliant writer, you must have lots of other talents, just let them shine... it is my second home too..... a warm welcome always awaits here, doesn't it.... xxxxxxx


wesleycox profile image

wesleycox 7 years ago from Back in Texas, at least until August 2012 Author

Yeah, it does but sometimes it can get a little frustrating. Thank you for finding my poem and liking it, and leaving such a nice comment.


\Brenda Scully 7 years ago

i know what you mean about frustrating.... you feel such a closeness, but the people you actually meet will always be strangers, stick with it, you kinda come to terms with that, we all have our lives too..... well done once again. keep shining


voyce 7 years ago

Loved that you shared...touching and true-thank you for your words! ;)


wesleycox profile image

wesleycox 7 years ago from Back in Texas, at least until August 2012 Author

Thank you for visiting and commenting.


brownlickie 7 years ago

don't stop keep on going the world wants to hear


wesleycox profile image

wesleycox 7 years ago from Back in Texas, at least until August 2012 Author

Thank you so much brownlickie. I am glad you enjoyed this poem.


\Brenda Scully 7 years ago

have a lovely day wesleycox, in everything you do..... i will be thinking about you


wesleycox profile image

wesleycox 7 years ago from Back in Texas, at least until August 2012 Author

You are so kind Brenda, I appreciate it. I am working on a new poem about the same thing. I am going to try and put together an epic poem. I hope it works out.


advisor4qb profile image

advisor4qb 7 years ago from On New Footing

Judging by the heart and soul person we have grown to know and love on hubpages, I think the feeling is pretty universal here on hubpages that your wife is making a big mistake. But that is her choice, and so, you must keep on going. The world doesn't stop so you can get off when your heart is broken, take it from me.

There have been times in my life, before I had children, when I felt like I had made an unforgivable mistake. And although I did make a mistake, the other person, who walked away, could have chosen a different response. Looking back, I can see the incompatibility. But it took me a very long time to get to a point to where I could even look at that situation with objectivity. That was the love of my life.

However, I now have three beautiful children. He is not their father. And in a way, I am glad. He caused me a great deal of pain before I ever did anything to him at all. Although there was a strong attraction, the relationship was weak.

And similarly, my current marriage is on the outs. The beginning of that poem kind of sounds like the things he was saying to me when I left MY husband nine months ago. We had tried and tried, but it never worked. After years of misery, I decided to leave. I stayed and stayed before that, because I felt guilty for leaving the last one. I have now decided to allow myself to be happy. I invite happiness into my life.

One door closes and another door opens. It may seem like a really bad thing right now, but the Lord is making room in your life for the person who is right for you and is going to be your true partner in life. I guess my life is on a similar tack, but my attitude is different.

Sometimes we have no choice about the place we are going. We can have a bad attitude and have a bad time (but still go there, whether we want to or not), or we can be what Florence Scovel Shinn calls "nonresistant" to the situation, and know that we can never really lose anything that is ours by divine right.

She would also say that you should repeat the following until you both believe it and receive it:

"There is no loss in Divine Mind, therefore, I cannot lose anything which belongs to me. It will be restored or I receive its equivalent."

Take it from someone who swam in self pity for far too long (and wasted years on heartache): Only you can pull yourself up from depression. If you can't change the situation, change yourself. Come to terms with it, and then stop dwelling on it. If she does not come back to you, it is because there is someone better for you.

Cheers!


wesleycox profile image

wesleycox 7 years ago from Back in Texas, at least until August 2012 Author

Advisor: Thank you for your beautifully put remarks. It is a terrible thing-divorce-and it is something I don't believe in, but as you said it is her choice so I will give her what she wants. Whether I move forward with my life after that is of little precedence. I know that I will be ok. I am Superman after all.


maggs224 profile image

maggs224 7 years ago from Sunny Spain

I am so sad that it didn't work out I had such high hopes after reading your other hub but alas it was not to be. You are however a powerful writer who can craft something worthwhile out of whatever life chucks at you so please keep on writing.


wesleycox profile image

wesleycox 7 years ago from Back in Texas, at least until August 2012 Author

Maggs: Thank you very much for your humbling comment. Thank you for reading my work and enjoying it.


\Brenda Scully 7 years ago

of course it will work out...... just do it.... just been reading your hub about memory...


wesleycox profile image

wesleycox 7 years ago from Back in Texas, at least until August 2012 Author

I guess the first step to writing an epic poem is learning what an epic poem is. I sure as hell hope that it doesn't have to be as long as the Iliad by Homer.


Pachuca213 6 years ago

I am so very sorry...this poem is lovely. But I can feel the hurt and pain in it as well. WOW...I didn't even realize you were going through that. Keep your head up to the stars and remember that somewhere out there is someone, the perfect someone for you and eventually you will find her....((HUGS))


wesleycox profile image

wesleycox 6 years ago from Back in Texas, at least until August 2012 Author

Thank you Pachuca, one day I'll write a poem of love and hopefully be able to nail the feelings of it as well as you do in your poems. Thank you for reading this poem.


Pachuca213 6 years ago

ahhh that was sweet....as the saying goes "tis better to have loved and lost...than to never have loved at all"...as hard as it is for you, you will learn from it whether its divorce or death, the end of a relationship is life changing...you will take what you learned and go from there. And trust me your words speak volumes! =) ((HUGS))


wesleycox profile image

wesleycox 6 years ago from Back in Texas, at least until August 2012 Author

Thank you.


trose 6 years ago

I relate to your poem and what you are going through. I am going through this right now. Thanks for having the courage to write what your heart is saying. It is inspirational and good to know that I am not alone. Thank you. Keep doing what you're doing. You are touching hearts everywhere....


wesleycox profile image

wesleycox 6 years ago from Back in Texas, at least until August 2012 Author

Trose: Thank you for visiting and reading my poem. I wish you peace in your future.


poetlorraine 6 years ago

hi re read your poem... how are you


wesleycox profile image

wesleycox 6 years ago from Back in Texas, at least until August 2012 Author

It appears that things are changing for me. Things may be good again and I may get to write a poem of love.


Pam 6 years ago

Wes I do Understand How you Feel and I The hurt with you. Please do not give up. I pray every night For both of you

Keep in mined That This Hurts Us to. We Want the pain to stop and For You both to be Happy Together again. Dont Count God out yet I have seen him do some pretty Amazing Things. And I have been asking him to do just that.

Pam


poetlorraine 6 years ago

sincerely hope that happens, it seems to be me you are a beautiful person and deserve the best xxxxxx


wesleycox profile image

wesleycox 6 years ago from Back in Texas, at least until August 2012 Author

Thank you for reading Pam. I hope you are right. I will never give up, it isn't in my vocabulary so I don't know what it means.

Thanks poetlorraine.


Zac828 profile image

Zac828 6 years ago from England

What a raw and beautiful poem, sorry that I've only just found it, but then glad I did. Really heartfelt and could feel the pain. Been through similar myself. Hope things are looking up.


alternate poet profile image

alternate poet 6 years ago

Seems I am late behind the rest - been there, done that, and like your rendition of the song of it all :)


wesleycox profile image

wesleycox 6 years ago from Back in Texas, at least until August 2012 Author

Zac and alternate poet: Thank you both for reading my poem and feeling what is written. Take care.


blake4d profile image

blake4d 6 years ago from Now Rising Out of Phoenix Arizona Earthlings

Nice hub. Feel bettter, Blake4d


wesleycox profile image

wesleycox 6 years ago from Back in Texas, at least until August 2012 Author

Thanks for your comment blake.


LiveStrong1009 profile image

LiveStrong1009 6 years ago

In life as well as love we learn that our biggest challage is not facing others, but facing ourselvs. Great hub.


wesleycox profile image

wesleycox 6 years ago from Back in Texas, at least until August 2012 Author

Your absolutely right livestrong, I touch on this in the poem Unwell. You should take a look at it. Thank you for reading and commenting.


dsimmons85 profile image

dsimmons85 6 years ago from Texas

Divorce SUCKS! Just stumbled onto your hub...I feel your pain. God bless!


wesleycox profile image

wesleycox 6 years ago from Back in Texas, at least until August 2012 Author

Thank you dsimmons85 you are most certainly right about that. Take care and hope everything comes out alright for you.


Hiredpun profile image

Hiredpun 6 years ago from Southern California

I hate divorces. So tragic and destructive.


wesleycox profile image

wesleycox 6 years ago from Back in Texas, at least until August 2012 Author

Thank you for reading hiredpun. I am glad that you liked the poem.


Dr Amit Borse 5 years ago

some time it feels god is unfair

and more so when someone is getting sivrced on his name, religion divides, love losses and you have nothing left.

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