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difficulty describing physical actions.

  1. kookoo88 profile image60
    kookoo88posted 6 years ago

    I'm trying to describe when a person leans their elbows on the table and puts their chin in their hands.

    Excerpt:
    "You have piqued my curiosity,” the knight said, sitting down on a stool.  He put his elbows on the table and the chin of his helmet in his hands as a child would when listening to a tale.  “Please proceed with the story.”

    It sounds terrible.  Any suggestions?

    Then next one is when a person puts their arms on the table, then rests their chin on them.

    The third one is when a person puts their arms out to the side to indicate that they don't know the answer to something.

    I've written these out and it sounds terrible each time.  All of them are around dialogue and I want it to flow smoothly with things that are being said.  Any recommendations?

  2. SomewayOuttaHere profile image61
    SomewayOuttaHereposted 6 years ago

    ...leaned forward, as he slid his elbow onto the table, cupped his chin in his hand and said 'you've piqued my interest'

  3. Denise Handlon profile image87
    Denise Handlonposted 6 years ago

    Someway-that was perfect.  smile

    1. Kangaroo_Jase profile image80
      Kangaroo_Jaseposted 6 years ago in reply to this

      agreed

  4. kookoo88 profile image60
    kookoo88posted 6 years ago

    Thank you. smile  Sorry for the long delay in responding.  I've been working on other areas.

    "cupping his chin in his hand" is the perfect phrase I've been looking for. smile  I also changed curiosity to interest, per your suggestion.  Thank you very much Someway. smile

    “Here now, Sir Dragon.  You have piqued my interest,” the knight said, sitting down on a stool.  He slid his elbows on the table, cupping his chin in his hands as a child would when listening to a tale.  “Please proceed with the story.”

    1. Denise Handlon profile image87
      Denise Handlonposted 6 years ago in reply to this

      Two thumbs up.  Sounds great.

  5. ddsurfsca profile image74
    ddsurfscaposted 6 years ago

    putting his chin into his cupped hands, his elbows on the rough surface of the table, he listened carefully, though somewhat uncomfortably.

  6. Lisa HW profile image81
    Lisa HWposted 6 years ago

    ..and after crossing his forearms on the table in front of him, he settled his chin onto the pillow they formed,

    On the third one, did he...      "... shrug in his inability to answer"  "shrug in his loss for words"

    or did he..

    "Throw his two hands in the air, clearly unable to come up with an answer to...."

    "Fling his hands, palms up, into the air, clearly at a loss for words"

    or maybe say it in a less awkward way:

    "Gesturing with his arms, it was clear he was at a loss for words "

    "With his inability to produce an adequate answer,  his arms spoke his frustration in one immediate and helpless gesture", almost as if he imagined the answer being dropped from the sky into his outstretched palms".

  7. Diane Inside profile image86
    Diane Insideposted 6 years ago

    ...as he slumped down at the table resting his chin on his arms...

  8. Diane Inside profile image86
    Diane Insideposted 6 years ago

    ...he then lets his arms drop to his sides, expressing that the answer evades him...

  9. Ben Evans profile image73
    Ben Evansposted 6 years ago

    "You have my attention with interest.,” the knight said, finding a place at the table with a listening perspective.  His hands felt the side of his jaw as he brushed his whiskers and propped his head from the table with a forward glance..........

 
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