NOTHING BUT THE TRUTH
I’m not perfect; I just smile to like one. Because, I know that, nobody’s perfect.
I’m Ferdie Jay Tado Paglinawan, 17 years old, born on November 2, 1993. I live in Emily Homes, Libertad, Butuan City, Philippines. I have two sisters and a brother, and wonderful parents. I’m currently studying at Butuan City School of Arts and Trades.
I’m lazy, liar, quitter, gambler, cheater, in other words I’m a huge sinner. I did bad things in my life, things that are not good, things that I regret, and things that made others mad. Honestly, I had committed suicide a hundred times, because of the mistakes I have made before, which can’t be changed. But, God didn’t give up on me and I know my family also won’t. I remember the time when the memories came back to me, the happy moments with the people who cared. The people who loved me for who I am. Because of that, I never made the biggest mistake of my life, which is committing suicide. Since I was introduced to gambling, I was addicted to it. As a result; I won several times and lost a thousand times. Money was wasted, and every time I lost, I’d always say this expression “How I wish I just donated it to the poor and needy”. But, in reality I can’t get it back, otherwise it’s called cheating or stealing. In my imperfect life, I had battles and challenges given to me. But, because of my laziness I can hardly finish each challenge. I quit more than finishing. Because sometimes when I stumble down and loses faith, I realized that giving up is the easiest answer. I’m a coward; I’m not even strong enough to tell the truth. I don’t want to be punished or belittled. That’s why I lied and cheated. Sins I have made are huge and very inappropriate. I have made mistakes in my life because I have lost my faith in God and in my self. I underestimated my self and I expect too much.
Sometimes I wish I was a billionaire, so that I can go around the world without any problems in front of me. But I asked my self, “Am I going to be happy? And have the same family?” I then answered in a question form, why still ask for more, if everything I want is already here? Why ask for more if the people who really love me are already here? Sometimes money can’t buy happiness or love you really deserve. I had many mistakes and regrets in my life. But I keep on asking myself; If I haven’t made those mistakes, will I ever change? And I realized it when I read the quote “LIFE=RISK, If you never failed, you never live life”. A wakeup call to my senses. I then knew why the quote “nobody’s perfect” is being spread out. Regret? I don’t have it anymore, because I have found out that regrets are the things you haven’t made, not the things you have made wrong. Because those mistakes that we made will always be in our mind, as an unforgettable moment in our lives. Maybe at this moment you’ll ask me where I had all these quotes. Well, I tell you. Every time I’m bored, lonely or when I lose faith, I watch Inspirational quotes on youtube.com.
How I wish life would be easy. How I wish that to change is very fast. And how I wish that problems aren’t made. But these thing are all made harder by God, to strengthen us, and to learn for our own mistakes. That’s why I pray all time for Him to help me change. That’s why we must all change within our selves to save Earth and to save each other, because our future lies in our hands. I wrote this write up, to let others know that they’re not the only ones who have problems in life. To let others know that financial and status doesn’t matter, the only thing that matters in life, is how were going to contribute to our society, and how were going to change our mistakes and failures in life. Because we don’t know when is our end, that’s why if I were you, I will live my life to the fullest, and share happy moments to the people who needs it. Because, “It’s better to give, even if we do not receive”. We only have one life, so why waste it?
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