Humpty Dumpty was Definitely Pushed.

Who killed Humpty Dumpty?

Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall.

Humpty Dumpty had a great fall.

All the King´´s horses and all the King´s men,

Couldn't put Humpty together again.

....................................................................... Ancient children´s Nursery Rhyme.


Humpty Dumpty was a beautiful egg,

Even a smile on his face,

He wasn't square. He wasn't round.

No, a perfect oval shape was he.


AHA !!! You may say there´s the rub.!

An egg cannot balance too well.

Placed on a wall..... then surely,

Our Humpty Dumpty. ... just.... fell.


Sorry, dear reader, I don´t believe this.

For one thing we are forgetting,

Humpty was no ordinary egg.

For he had arms and he had legs.


Legs to hang down the front of the wall

feet in his favourite trainers and all,

Arms he had.. long with hands at the ends.

He could hold on when he sat on the wall,

He could settle well- balanced. you see.

No need for wobbling for this special egg

For he had arms and he had legs..

Nevertheless, down Humpty came,

Smashed into too many pieces.

So he wasn't hard boiled, or safe he´d have been.

No , ,splattered around was this poor little egg.

All the king´s horses, the nursery rhyme says

Couldn't put Humpty together again.

Well what a ridiculous statement to make,

How could the horses, for goodness sake,

Take on a task like this??.


Wonderful horses, can trot, run, and jump

But hooves, horses have not hands.

The horses are not to blame.

It´s the humans who carry the shame..


Let´s forget who to blame after the fall,

HOW could dear Humpty fall from the wall?

The answer is obvious.

He was pushed !!!!!!!!!!!


Many a scandal has been ´´ hushed up.´´

Here we have another égg-gate´´

Or better to be known as Humptygate.!

Which ever way you look at this

sad, sorry tale.....

You cannot escape from the facts.

It MUST have been a big cover--up,

to save face for someone who lapsed.


Jealousy, maybe, of Humpy´s great fame,

overtook somebody else.

So, from behind, where no one could see......

Our perpetrator crept, slowly with glee!

AND HUMPTY DUMPTY WAS PUSHED:!!!


Oh, What a mess!!!! A young , uncooked egg,

Spreading all over the road.

No-one to help our dear Humpty Dumpty,

Yet from the road the mess must be cleared.

All the King´s men saw to that!


No--one must see signs of where Humpty fell,

Can´t let the King , or the people find out.,

What really went amiss,

Yes, Humptygate still is a mystery to me,

and all who believe in justice.


All we can hope, we ordinary folk,

is that the powers that be had SOME heart,

and scooped up dear Humpty, not for the dump,

but buried him decently in a beautiful park.





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Comments 38 comments

epigramman profile image

epigramman 4 years ago

....well you and I , my dear friend and esteemed colleague, are definitely on the same wave length here - this is a fabulous satirical piece in which I would be proud to write - it's cheeky and saucy and fun but yet it's profound and true and also provocative - in other words - a brilliant write and a sensational read for me - sending you my good energy and warm wishes from lake erie time ontario canada 11:14 am on this early summer's day


Sheena Hayes profile image

Sheena Hayes 4 years ago from Fayetteville, North Carolina

This was a great read that points out the poorly hidden flawed logic in Humpty "falling". Damn those murderous King's men! Good job! Voted up!


Dim Flaxenwick profile image

Dim Flaxenwick 4 years ago from Great Britain Author

Hi epi...... I was thrilled to see your comment.You are the Master, so to get a comment like this from you is truly wonderful to me.

Thank you so much for spelling out what is good about it.

Have a good day. Hope the weather is warming up for you.


Dim Flaxenwick profile image

Dim Flaxenwick 4 years ago from Great Britain Author

Sheena Hayes, Pleased to meet you on hubpages.

Thank you so much for your witty comment.


billybuc profile image

billybuc 4 years ago from Olympia, WA

Well isn't this just a piece of art! What a wonderful turn of phrase with some many different avenues to follow. I felt like Sherlock Holmes making my way through a tough case. Love this and sharing!


RealHousewife profile image

RealHousewife 4 years ago from St. Louis, MO

Very clever! Thanks for a chuckle - and thanks to Billybuc for sharing this with me this morning:)

I like how you had fun with the old rhyme, when I was a little kid I used to wonder and wonder about old humpty!


Vidya Mallar profile image

Vidya Mallar 4 years ago from India

This is just a wonderful imagination... Never should have any one bothered about Humpty Dumpty... I should say this has given me a very different way of looking into rhymes from now... Voted up...


Dim Flaxenwick profile image

Dim Flaxenwick 4 years ago from Great Britain Author

Hi billybuc, so glad you had fun with this. Maybe you have a new career ahead as a replacement Sherlock Holmes. Ha Ha. Thanks so much.


Dim Flaxenwick profile image

Dim Flaxenwick 4 years ago from Great Britain Author

hello RealHouswife, I appreciate Billyuc sharing this with you. It was kind of him. I ´m even more pleased that you liked it too.

Some of these old nursery rhymes are strange you know. Like Rock a bye baby on the tree top, when the wind blows, the cradle will rock, When the bough breaks the cradle will fall, Down will come baby , cradle and all.!!!!!! What the heck is THAT all about . Who puts a baby in a tree anyway. ??? Hee Hee.

Thank you so much for commenting.


Dim Flaxenwick profile image

Dim Flaxenwick 4 years ago from Great Britain Author

Hello Vidya Mallar

Very kind of you to take the time to comment.

Thank you very much.


mckbirdbks profile image

mckbirdbks 4 years ago from Emerald Wells, Just off the crossroads,Texas

Cleverly crafted. Over easy as it were.


Dim Flaxenwick profile image

Dim Flaxenwick 4 years ago from Great Britain Author

Thank you mckbirdbks,

Waergate has nothing on Humptygate.......


Movie Master profile image

Movie Master 4 years ago from United Kingdom

Hi Dim, this is so clever - loved it!


Dim Flaxenwick profile image

Dim Flaxenwick 4 years ago from Great Britain Author

Thank you movie master.

I´m really happy that so many have liked it. I think my husband would have had me sectioned at the nearest mental home,otherwise.


Angela Blair profile image

Angela Blair 4 years ago from Central Texas

Dim -- amazingly clever (and how fortunate your husband is to have a wife that thinks outside the box -- life will never be dull!) Definitely voted up. Best/Sis


Dim Flaxenwick profile image

Dim Flaxenwick 4 years ago from Great Britain Author

Oh Angela, You are too kind.

Thank you so much for the comment.


blaise25 profile image

blaise25 4 years ago from close to you...

I've never thought of that question.. Now I know what to say why Humpty Dumpty had a great fall lol

I enjoyed this Dim. You're the best!


rahul0324 profile image

rahul0324 4 years ago from Gurgaon, India

Lovely

It is a must read!

I had fun all along the poem


Maddambutterfly profile image

Maddambutterfly 4 years ago from New Mexico

This was wonderful! I felt like a child again..


sammimills profile image

sammimills 4 years ago from California, USA

Interesting! Voted Up!


Dim Flaxenwick profile image

Dim Flaxenwick 4 years ago from Great Britain Author

Hi blaise, nice to se yo.

A litte humour now and then is needed I think.

take care.


Dim Flaxenwick profile image

Dim Flaxenwick 4 years ago from Great Britain Author

rahul0324., Maddabutterfly and sammimlls

I´d like to thank all 3 of you for visiting my page and leaving such positive comments.

You are all very encouraging to me.


Micky Dee profile image

Micky Dee 4 years ago

Pretend democracies require the breaking of eggs - and the strangling of chickens.


RunAbstract profile image

RunAbstract 4 years ago from USA

Poor Humpty! And all this time I thought he fell when he was actually pushed! Humptygate! It has all been so hush-hush with too little known by the public. But the "spin doctors" have insisted for years now that he fell. It must have involed some very important members of society to have the facts swept under the carpet.

And those poor horses sent to Humpty's aide! I'm sure they did their best while only making matters worse. The men should have been sent first! Maybe Humpty would have stood a chance. So the question is... Who made the decision to send the horses first? If we could only know!

WONDERFUL Hub!!! SO fresh and original! I had a blast reading this! Voted up and more!


Dim Flaxenwick profile image

Dim Flaxenwick 4 years ago from Great Britain Author

Hi Micky,

Thanks so much for your cryptic comment. I´m sure my brain will eventually understand the reference to strangled chickens.

Take care. Glad you managd the ride last Monday. Hope you´ve recovered now., thogh I know your pain never goes away completely.

Take care,

Dim


Dim Flaxenwick profile image

Dim Flaxenwick 4 years ago from Great Britain Author

Dear Runabstrct,

Your comment is as funny as my hub. I am laughing my socks off, as I try to figure out who sent the horses in 1st, and who really is behind the cover up,??????

Thank you so much for a wonderful comment. you make me feel my writing is worthwhile.

Take care,

Dim


RunAbstract profile image

RunAbstract 4 years ago from USA

Oh Dim! Your writting is ALWAYS worthwhile! I just wish I had more time to read!!!

Your HubLand friend,

Run


Dim Flaxenwick profile image

Dim Flaxenwick 4 years ago from Great Britain Author

Cheers, Run,!!!!


Mhatter99 profile image

Mhatter99 4 years ago from San Francisco

great, absolutely great!


Dim Flaxenwick profile image

Dim Flaxenwick 4 years ago from Great Britain Author

Ha Ha! Thank you so much.

Mhatther99, pleased to meet you on hubpages.

Glad you liked it. I had great fun writing it.


Linda Cassini profile image

Linda Cassini 4 years ago from Las Vegas NV

A "Toast" to your Egg story...Hahaha enjoyed it thanks :)


Dim Flaxenwick profile image

Dim Flaxenwick 4 years ago from Great Britain Author

Hi there Linda Cassini....

Thank you for the comment. I still laugh , myself , sometimes when I read it. hee. Hee.


PADDYBOY60 profile image

PADDYBOY60 4 years ago from Centreville Michigan

I believe you have got it. Elementary my dear Watson.


Dim Flaxenwick profile image

Dim Flaxenwick 4 years ago from Great Britain Author

Ha Ha.! Thank you so much.

I loved writing it.


DREAM ON profile image

DREAM ON 3 years ago

I loved your story.But the truth was Humpty Dumpty loved to drink.That fateful night he came home and sat on the wall.Waiting for Mrs.Dumpty to call.The cell phone rang and he went to answer it and when he did he lost his balance and cracked his head.When his horse went to go for help.The kingsmen came but it was too late.Poor Humpty Dumptys head was beet red.They covered it up to keep the Humptys reputation from being tarnished and keep Mrs. Dumpty from losing her mind.So they came up with a master plan to confuse people by saying Humpty Dumpty just slipped and had a terrible fall and then the kings horses tried so hard to put poor Humpty Dumpty together but couldn't .To throw everyone off track.Funny read.


Dim Flaxenwick profile image

Dim Flaxenwick 3 years ago from Great Britain Author

I have laughed myself silly reading your comment.

It´s a very good alternative to my political cover-- up notion.

Best wishes as always.


DREAM ON profile image

DREAM ON 23 months ago

I have returned to read and have a good laugh before bed. Your writings and friendship is something I enjoy very much. Hope you are fulfilling your dreams with good health and love.


Dim Flaxenwick profile image

Dim Flaxenwick 22 months ago from Great Britain Author

so good to hear from you.

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