lower myself

Yes I bleed.
Yes I bleed.

The time has finally come.

Its time to turn and see my reflection in that damn mirror.

Its time to face all of my demons.

I brought myself to the the point of destruction.

Every time I'm close to happiness I kill everything.

I am the one who rips open these wounds.

My wounds grow deeper everyday.

Its getting to where I am nothing anymore.

A faceless spirit walking among the empty trash we call humans.

What have I become?

The question asked when you become disgusted.

Now the final question how do I fix this hole I put in my heart?

I am my own worse enemy in a war that is going nowhere.

I walk alone in my agony.

I walk down the lonely road of pain.

Comments 5 comments

drcrischasse profile image

drcrischasse 6 years ago from NH/Foxboro

No one is ever alone. Days always get better :)


Neil Sperling profile image

Neil Sperling 6 years ago from Port Dover Ontario Canada

You are asking yourself some good questions - "BE OPEN" to hear your own answers and follow your inner light. Your depth of character has a light that is pure.... That comes clearly out in your writing. Turn on your heart light - let it shine where ever you are. Let it shine for people you know and for all the world to see. Fear not the light within and simply turn from the darkness. Let go!

Love your poems.

Love - Light - Laughter

Neil


Cheeky Girl profile image

Cheeky Girl 6 years ago from UK and Nerujenia

I wonder why the road of pain has to be a lonely one, Chrissie. It's better to share, sometimes we need to confide or even just get a 2nd opinion on our logic. I found those 2nd opinions valuable back in the day. (Yeah that logic can be so like not working all the time, like a slow damn clock)

And telling it here is sharing in a way. You battle with "demons" (of the romantic kind) through out a lot of your hubs. And you should not lose faith or belief in yourself. Most kinds of wounds mend eventually.

Find you own 2 halves, the good one and the other one that needs changing and change it as best you can and then believe that the two parts are the one amazing person. Because any person who can do that is amazing. We are all made up of separate parts - and they can sometimes need a "hammer" to get them into shape. (I mean that in a good way. I fixed the issue of dealing with self-fulfilling prophesies in my life.)

I made a discovery about my self a while back. Some parts of myself I can change - and other parts I can never change. We all have similar situations. I recognised my own truth, imperfect though it seemed and I accepted it. I thought I was stuck. But no - that one "thing" turned out to be the catalyst for everything in my life. Go figure what the damn "one thing" is in your life story. Discovering the answers to things like that is like discovering a pair of Bionic strap on Wing-jets. It does wonders for the ego, and widens the mind. The person in this hub sounds familiar to me. If no one will believe in that person, I will.


burning bush profile image

burning bush 6 years ago

Although we are of different backgrounds, age, and frames of reference, we have a commonality of mind. I have had depression for many years and, like you, it seems I reside within the great circle of crap. Everything I do is an adventure and the simplest things turn into nightmares. You are not alone. Many of us face demons every day and while our demons may have a different face, the need to defeat them is our commonality. You are welcome to contact me or I am certain, any number of us who write these hubs and we will listen. You are not alone. Sharing is a good thing.


Astra Nomik profile image

Astra Nomik 5 years ago from Edge of Reality and Known Space

Chrissie, you sound like you are going through stuff there. Win that Battle. You are a great writer. We believe in you. And this poem, even though its dark, is not about all the things that you are. You have lots of wonderful qualities. Bring it back to see the positives too. What I say here goes for Cheeky Girl too. Have a good weekend. Take care. :)

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