She told me I would be beautiful.
That I would have all the friends I wanted
That the boys would look.
They never looked…
She told me that it wouldn’t matter.
That it could be just between us.
Nobody would find out.
That it wouldn’t hurt anybody.
She promised me control and acceptance.
She promised me everything I wanted.
She stormed into my life
I tried to grab it, I tried to hold on, but I watched it slip..
Like sand though a child’s fingers.
I was gone.
She took me from my friends, family.
She taught me how to lie well.
She told me how ugly I was
That I would never be good enough…
I believed her.
She embarrassed me.
At night she would leave me and I would be left looking at what she did.
Leave me crying alone, because nobody new.
But everyone knew…
They sat on the sidelines
Watching her kill me slowly…
Because that what she does
She separates, alienates and lies.
And even though I pushed her away.
Sometimes I still hear her
Calling ,searching for me.
Whispering the same empty promises
I know she will never leave me completely
That I will hear her for the rest of my life
But I do not listen, because I know her.
She will promise you everything…
But will give you less then nothing every time.
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