Untold Stories from an American Emergency Room

How Can I Meet a Girl With Principles?

It's as plain as the nose on your face!
It's as plain as the nose on your face! | Source

Girl Bites Nose and the Fun Begins...

Jack woke up in a fine mood. He lingered in the hot shower an extra five minutes, enjoying the spray on his long muscular back.

After drying off, he wrapped the towel around his waist and prepared to brush his teeth and shave. He looked into the mirror and rubbed his sexy blue eyes. He found a lonely gray hair and plucked it out. He just didn't believe that two would grow back in its place.

He smiled at his reflection. His eyes still had that amused twinkle that his mother had said was nothing but pure flirty come-on for all the girls. She was right, Jack loved to flirt.

He lathered up his face and half frowned over his nose. That protruding lump of damaged flesh was a minor flaw in an otherwise perfect face. Just a shade too long and recently dented in a fight, he mused.

He considered seeing a plastic surgeon. Maybe after a nose job he could even be a model. Advertising those young executive suits in the catalogs seemed like a profitable sideline to get into.

He finished in the bathroom and walked into his bedroom to dress. Today was Go Western day at the office. He put on his blue jeans, black cowboy boots, a blue shirt, a black bolo tie and a crisp black jacket. His black cowboy hat, some turquoise cuff links and a leather belt with an armadillo buckle completed the outfit.

Jack felt sharp today and sure enough, Sharp Dressed Man by ZZ top was playing on the radio as soon as he turned it on. Even the humid Houston weather was cooperating today. It was a cool, almost springtime day, not a cloud in the sky.

Tonight after work, Jack and a buddy were planning to go to some of the popular bars in search of young, nubile "Texas girls". Tonight, just before the rodeo began there would be plenty of sweet young things all dressed in tight fitting jeans. He smiled thinking of the night to come.

He walked into the office and said good morning to Chuck. "Ready for tonight, buddy?"

"Yea, we're going to cruise till we bruise," Chuck replied with a big grin on his face.

They spent their day calling clients and watching the clock. Jack wondered if quitting time would ever actually arrive. He was so ready for a party.

Finally, quitting time made its appearance and they started off with happy hour at the bar across the street from the office. Everyone was in a great mood. Maybe it was the weather, maybe it was the smell of Stetsons everywhere.

Jack asked a cute blond to dance. She gave him the brush off. "Women," he said to Chuck. "Why do they come out to bars looking to meet a guy, then not dance with one when they're asked?"

Chuck nodded. "They always seem to be afraid of something."

"Or looking for Mr. Tall, blond and perfect driving a Ferrari and flashing eight inches of credit cards and cash to spend." Jack raised his glass to his friend and smiled.

They stayed a while longer having a few more rounds. Jack noticed that the blond left with a rough looking man in a red shirt. No accounting for taste, he thought.

Jack and Chuck decided to head over to a bar called Streamers. They had both heard that is was a wild place with lots of single women and lots of action. When they arrived, they found it was packed and had trouble finding a parking spot. They spotted a redhead in a white jumpsuit going into the door.

"Whoa, I hope all the girls here are that hot!" Chuck exclaimed.

When they walked through the door, the loud rock music assaulted their ears. They saw five girls dressed in cowgirl outfits dancing at various locations throughout the club. The dance floor was crowded. They chose a table near one of the dancing girls.

The girl that came over to take their order was saucy. She had Teddy Bear shorts that proclaimed "Howdy" on the front. A low cut knotted shirt completed the show. They ordered beers and settled in to check out the action.

"Hey Chuck, you think we'll ever find some girls with real principles?" Jack asked.

"Not in this place. Right now I'd settle for the redhead in the white jumpsuit. I hope she won't have the good sense to turn me down." he replied.

"Well go ask her. I think I'll try that lady standing at the bar." Jack made his way toward the bar. He stumbled a bit getting up. "Whoa, must have had a few too many already," he mumbled.

The girl was petite and well dressed. She had big brown eyes surrounded by soft, blond curls. Jack moved up to stand beside her.

"Hi! Would you like to dance?" he asked.

"Thanks, but no. I'm here with my boyfriend."

"Why did he run off and leave a lovely girl like you to fight this crowd?"

"He's just over there talking to some friends."

"I would never leave you to fend for yourself." he said leaning forward and exhaling.

"Look, I said that I'm here with my boyfriend. Why don't you just buzz off?" She gave him a disgusted look.

Jack's anger instantly erupted. He was just trying to be friendly. Maybe it was the alcohol going to his head. He just wanted someone to be civil to him.

"I was just trying to be nice to you. Why are you getting so uptight?"

"If you must know," she said tight-lipped, "I think it's proper for a lady to be loyal and not let herself get picked up by some jerk in a bar!"

That did it. For years Jack had been looking for just such a girl and here she was. But she was with someone else. It made him furious that her idiot boyfriend wasn't around so he could tell him a thing or two about protecting his girl. He didn't have long to wait. The boyfriend, wondering what was taking so long, had come up to the bar looking for her. He saw Jack talking to her and stepped in.

"What's the problem, Lisa?" he asked.

"Nothing, Tom, he just asked me to dance."

He turned to Jack, "The lady is with me, pal. Go ask someone else."

Jack knew he should walk away. The situation could get nasty. He wanted to tell Tom about girls alone at the bar being free game and how he should have met her first. He opened his mouth to speak just as his foot got caught on the bar rail and he stumbled right into Tom.

"Oh great, a drunk!" Tom said.

Jack didn't think he was all that drunk. He got madder at the remark. He moved instinctively into a boxing stance. Tom punched him in the stomach, and the fight was on.

Jack counter punched with a right to Tom's jaw, knocking him down. People were moving out of the way. One girl screamed when she saw the blood on Tom's mouth. The bartender reached for a phone to call the police.

Tom got up and tried to rush at Jack. Jack caught him with a left uppercut. Tom fell, this time unconscious.

"Lisa shouted, "Look at him! You're a hateful, miserable jerk!" She grabbed Jack, not fully realizing what she was doing. He spun around to face her. She glared at him and reached up and bit into his nose with such force that she severed one side completely.

Jack, surprised, raised his arms to break her grip and tried to hold his nose in place. Blood was streaming down and getting into his mouth. Chuck came over to stand with his friend as the police arrived. They looked at the mess and called an ambulance.

Later, Chuck and Jack were sitting the local emergency room. The doctor was explaining that he thought the damage was bad enough to call in a plastic surgeon.

"You mean I could get a decent nose job out of this?" Jack asked.

"Dr. Brand is an excellent plastic surgeon. You could discuss that with him when he gets here."

Jack looked at his friend and said, "Just my luck. I finally meet a girl I could respect. Not only does she stand up for her boyfriend, but she does me this wonderful favor. What a night!"

Chuck looked at him in astonishment as Jack began to laugh. A nurse walking by heard him laughing. She couldn't understand what someone with a torn and bloody nose could possibly find to be so hilarious.

A Trip to the Emergency Room

emergency room
emergency room | Source

Better Luck Next Time!

Lost Love
Lost Love | Source

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Untold Stories from the Emergency Room

© 2011 Austinstar

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Comments 18 comments

Just Ask Susan profile image

Just Ask Susan 5 years ago from Ontario, Canada

Enjoyed this story and liked how you described self centered Jack. Figures he would get his nose almost bitten off and see a good thing come from it. I only hope that the plastic surgeon can make it look better.

Hit all the buttons and good luck in the contest!


RealHousewife profile image

RealHousewife 5 years ago from St. Louis, MO

Well Jack is going to just be able to stare at his own perfect reflection in the mirror after the nose job!

I loved the story - I could I agine it as I read but not guess where you were going and I love that! The characters were very realistic and the verbatim as well! Great job!!! I voted up and everything....maybe that woman's date should have taken her to dinner first:). Wow!


diogenes profile image

diogenes 5 years ago from UK and Mexico

LOved it, AS, espcially "eight inches of credit cards," you're too much...Bob


Old Poolman profile image

Old Poolman 5 years ago from Rural Arizona

Up and all the rest of those buttons. I loved this story, especially when you show that some good can come from bad things happening to you. This story should place well.


Austinstar profile image

Austinstar 5 years ago from Somewhere in the universe Author

@Jas - I'm thinking the beer might have made it seem funny at the time.

@Real - It's doubtful that Jack's nose job could really make a difference. What do you think?

@Bob - Girls back then (and maybe now) really did use the credit card test at one time. Oops, I let that cat out of the bag.

@OP - Good can always come from bad. And sometimes bad is not really all that bad. It builds character.


RealHousewife profile image

RealHousewife 5 years ago from St. Louis, MO

Apparently it will only make a difference to Jack! lol


WillStarr profile image

WillStarr 5 years ago from Phoenix, Arizona

Sounds like a typical boy's night out! Good work. Voted up and across.


Pamela99 profile image

Pamela99 5 years ago from United States

I think the story is great. The character of Jack was very well done.


Austinstar profile image

Austinstar 5 years ago from Somewhere in the universe Author

@Will - Did it remind you of your younger days?

@Pam - Thank you for the kind words. I think Jack is pretty real too.


WillStarr profile image

WillStarr 5 years ago from Phoenix, Arizona

"Will - Did it remind you of your younger days?"

It reminds me of last Saturday night!

^_*


Frannie Dee profile image

Frannie Dee 5 years ago from Chicago Northwest Suburb

Lisa's wild. Wonder how this will develop.

Up and awesome.


Austinstar profile image

Austinstar 5 years ago from Somewhere in the universe Author

@Will - that's funny!

@Frannie - Maybe she will become a plastic surgeon!


christopheranton profile image

christopheranton 5 years ago from Gillingham Kent. United Kingdom

I loved that one. In fact I am jealous that I didn't write it myself. That Jack must be an eternal optimist. Mind you, he would need to be, when people bite his nose off all the time.


Austinstar profile image

Austinstar 5 years ago from Somewhere in the universe Author

Hi Christopher. That Jack, he is the optimist, right? Maybe he should have complained about all the blood getting on his suit? I know I would have.


drbj profile image

drbj 5 years ago from south Florida

Jack must have been tall. You said he had a 'long muscular back.' And Lisa must have been rather short. You said she was 'petite.' Just thinkin' - he's lucky she didn't bite something else half off!

Loved the story, Lela, voted up.


RealHousewife profile image

RealHousewife 5 years ago from St. Louis, MO

Rolfpp@Drbj;)


Austinstar profile image

Austinstar 5 years ago from Somewhere in the universe Author

@drbj - Again, you really scare me, woman. But then, I have seen that happen too. And we can't forget Lorena Bobbit.

@Real - I hope you have a maid to clean all your pants!


RealHousewife profile image

RealHousewife 5 years ago from St. Louis, MO

You know I'm the maid! Lol.

OOoOOoOooOooohhhh yeah Loreana Bobbit - can you believe she got away with that? Literally! Lmao

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