Revenge, Inc. Part 8: A Short Story

Authors Note:

Hello everyone and welcome back. I apologize if anyone of you were waiting for this, as I'm just making my own deadline. Each week, I'm finishing my installments later than the previous week, albeit before the end of Friday, before midnight.

I was once told by told by my Creative Writing professor in college that there is a distinction between what a writer writes and what a reader reads in accordance with the very same text. I think that the way in which I view my Revenge, Inc. series and the way you, my audience views it are two different viewpoints...I just hope that I can close the gap and answer all of the questions you may have about this story as a whole, so please feel free to leave any questions you may have in the comment box and as always, I encourage you to do so as it's always appreciated. Again, thank you for coming by and supporting my work as it is the impetus for me to finish!

Of course this story is ongoing week-to-week and there is much that preceded this installment so if you haven't already, please read up to Part 7 before going any further. Just click on the corresponding link to get redirected. Thank you.

-ODP

Revenge, Inc. Part 1

Revenge, Inc. Part 2

Revenge, Inc. Part 3

Revenge, Inc. Part 4

Revenge, Inc. Part 5

Revenge, Inc. Part 6

Revenge, Inc. Part 7

“So, what did you find?”

“No matches Captain. Nada…We searched all ‘Knowns’ and nothing comes up. The four hair follicles found inside her are all from the same guy and the sperm too, so the ‘gang-bang theory’s gone. We may have a new pedophile on our hands…”

“Not once did I believe that one, Harold. There’s much more to this than it seems. Whoever did this either owns a yacht or has access to one. Check for registered owners and employees of the yacht clubs. I need names and need to know where all these people were during the time of Cody’s daughter’s disappearance. They may have seen or heard something…What is it?”

“The boy, you know, the one Haley dated…Charlie, right? How was it that he saw her last and knows nothing? And what about the parents?”

“He walked her home and that was all. We’ve been through this already. He and his parents were questioned just as soon as she was pulled from the lake. All their stories match. They’re clean. Where Charlie left Haley was right in front of the house, right after giving her a kiss on the cheek.”

“And where was Cody?”

“He admitted that he’d fallen asleep on the couch in front of the tube while waiting for her and so didn't see anything that may have transpired in that void. His father—Father Frank—can attest to that, because at around 8:20 that evening, the two spoke on the phone.”

“So what happened to her from the time she arrived in front of her house to the time we found her at the lake, besides the fact that she was choked to death? Dammit! There are so many questions still unanswered. Each time we look, we come up empty.”

“That’s exactly what we’re trying to find out, Harold. So help me, I will find out what happened to her. I won’t let this case go unsolved, no matter how long it takes. There must be a motive in all this.  I just don't see this as a random act.”

“This doesn’t by any chance have anything to do with Cody, does it?”

“I’m keeping my word and carrying it out…Talk about tragic. You don’t go back on your word on a dead man. Something like that can haunt you the rest of your natural born life. Think about it, Harold. What would you do if it were your daughter?”

"I'm afraid to say."

I could feel myself getting stronger each and every day and felt that urgency growing inside me like a hungry animal. I gave myself into the want of fighting those who couldn’t fight back. All the time, Master Akira instilled in me my objective, which was the ‘Power to Act.’ In all his lessons he ignited that fire within me to dispel all doubts inside me that would otherwise create a barrier between me and my objective. The rainy days and sunny days on Jirai Island came and went. Just as long as there was light on the island, I was training and working towards an end that was beginning to materialize itself before my eyes. The chores on the island of course still needed tending to, but Master Akira did half of what I was doing and so cut my workload in half. He did after all had to do all this work himself before I got there, right? A new lesson was taught to me by him in each his sessions.

“You must be faster than opponent, Cody-san…But much better to be quicker. You know the difference?”

“Yes, I do.”

“No, not yet! But in time, you will.” I gave him a look and he slapped me. “Do you see? The power to act is not enough! A man can be defeated in blink of eye…Take quickness over speed always…” He then picked up the two rattan swords on the ground and threw one of them to me. “Now, let me see how you spar.”

I raised my rattan sword up to eye level and took my stance and Master Akira took his like stance but with his rattan sword pointing downward. Without blinking, I charged forward and swung from the side which he easily blocked which was pretty much was expected. But what I did not expect was his bringing up his elbow and hitting me square in the jaw. “Too close, Cody-san! You come in too close…Again!” I touched my lower lip and although I found no blood, I knew that pretty soon, I’d have a fat lip. So again, I came from the side again and this time from Master Akira’s right while being careful to not step in too close, just as he insisted. This time around we went a few strikes for six rounds and after each; Master Akira took a step back and nodded his head in approval. On the seventh, however, things went a bit different: I went overhand to strike at his head in which he countered then dropped to a knee and swiped at my ankle which landed and pretty damn hard may I add.

“Fuck!” I yelled out and fell to the ground. The guy didn’t even flinch. He got back into his stance and was ready immediately.

“Again, Cody-san. No time for pain. Must resist.” I got up and readied myself and heard some kind of crunch sound when I did. What the fuck was that? And in that space of a moment, I saw his rattan blade move at an impossible speed. I parried backwards just in time with my sword raised to counter it. “Focus! Stop holding back!” With this said, I gave him a nod. I took a step back for moment and set. I then stepped in and went on a flurry of sorts, doing my best to strike him down. He matched my speed with his quickness, just as he’d been trying so hard to teach me. While doing this I looked at him from each angle, blow for blow—I was digging for an opening.

“No more games, Cody-san!” He yelled, while inches from my face while our swords were crossed. “No more wait!” Again I took one step back and feigned to rest but then came in with an uppercut, which took Master Akira by surprise. I was overtaking him and he was losing ground…Finally, I saw it! I slashed once across and disarmed him, sending his sword airborne and placed my rattan sword an inch from his throat. He then set his feet and stood upright and bowed.

“Very good, Cody-san. I honor you.” Never before since stepping foot on this island was I so proud of myself. I had to force myself from smiling to hide my joy. Master Akira then walked away, towards the shore and invited me over to where he was. The sun was beginning to set and the cool breezes were welcoming. I saw that there was a smile on his face when I reached him.

“A lot of fire, Cody-san.…Lot of abuse from hammer to make katana: Fire, hammer, fold. Fire, hammer, fold…Katana bend but never break, because katana very strong." Master Akira then looked into my eyes and felt those eyes look into my very soul. He seemed to understand. "Be like katana, Cody-san. Be unbreakable.” He then smiled at me and walked back to the house at his leisure to start our supper.

That night, I stared out into the distance past the horizon. Other than the sounds of the waves breaking against the shores, there was nothing but my thoughts, which wandered off to that day yet again of finding my little girl lying there atop that black body bag with her eyes closed and head turned to one side with her golden blonde hair splashed over her shoulders. God, she looked so much like Adrianna, like her mother and so beautiful and at peace just like when she too had passed. And if there really is a heaven the two of them are there together, reunited. I felt around my neck and found them again and gripped tightly the two of them and never wanted to let go…

There, a mere one-hundred yards away from the stilted house, two rafts reached Jirai Island’s eastern shore. There was no mistaking it. I counted twelve figures in all, dressed entirely in black. They were like a multiplication of black ants all running while half-bent over and silently along the moonlit shore. I dreaded the thought, but it rang over and over again inside my mind like the tolling of a bell:

We were under attack.

Continue reading...

© Copyright 2009. All Rights Reserved.

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61 comments

Justine76 7 years ago

dude...i didnt read it yet, but this may be my only chance to comment first...im sure its awesome and since your one of those rare people who tolerates 2 comments, ill be back...


dohn121 profile image

dohn121 7 years ago from Hudson Valley, New York Author

First, let me start off by thanking for being the first to comment, as I just left for a minute. Second, I'd like to also thank you for giving me the benefit of the doubt that this installment is "awesome" like you said. I just wrote about the last 700 words or so the past three hours! Thanks, DM, for commenting. I expect to hear back from you soon ;)


emievil profile image

emievil 7 years ago from Philippines

Dohn, how dare you end the story like that?????????? LOL j/k. Seriously friend, you have me on the edge of my seat wondering what those black figures are doing on the island, what do they want and what will happen next. Aaarrrggghhhh! Please don't tell me I have to wait till next Friday (Saturday here) to read the next installment? The suspense is killing me!


dohn121 profile image

dohn121 7 years ago from Hudson Valley, New York Author

:D I know, I'm awful! This is just the kind of ending that would drive me nuts...And keep me coming back for more! Patience, grasshopper :)

Thanks, as always Emie. You really are a fan!


emievil profile image

emievil 7 years ago from Philippines

Can't help it. I like ninjas, kung fu, martial arts, the works. I grew up watching Jet Lee, Jacky Chan and even Bruce Lee. I even liked Kill Bill (with all its blood and gore). That's what hooked me to your story (no, not the blood and gore LOL) - the ninja aspect :).


dohn121 profile image

dohn121 7 years ago from Hudson Valley, New York Author

Yup, me too. I especially like Gordon Liu and just about any Shaw Brothers produced movie. A couple of the ones that stand out to me are: The 36th Chamber of Death, Master Killer, Five Deadly Venoms, Fist of the White Lotus, and the Five Fingers of Death (Lo Lei). Drunken Master was by far Jackie's best movie!

Love your new avatar by the way!


prettydarkhorse profile image

prettydarkhorse 7 years ago from US

thats a suspense Dohn (what will happen next time the twelve men are there), and I will be waiting patiently what will happen again, I am always fascinated with training and speed also.... This could be a movie,,YAY,I was just thinking about an American-Asian dad with a dead child and ninja kind of revenge,

And then I am also waiting for the motive and who did it thing,,,

you got me hooked!!

Congrats again Dohn,

Have a good day always, Maita


Keira 7 7 years ago

Hi my friend, I just came back from a trip, and was happy to come home and read part8. Lovely work as always. Brilliant Dohn. Love it. Cant wait to read more. But also I dont want to push you.:). I will say I have some patience:) Have a lovely weekend my dear good friend. See you soon.:)


dusanotes profile image

dusanotes 7 years ago from Windermere, FL

If this is the ending, Dohn, it is superb. Like many of your readers, I was looking for more. Maybe that's the mark of excellent pacing and a wonderful climax. You are very good with dialog and the pictures helped, too. Good luck to you. Obviously, you have a great following and a wonderful future ahead of you. Don White


juneaukid profile image

juneaukid 7 years ago from Denver, Colorado

Your writing is getting stronger each time just like your protagonist. Good work, Dohn! I expect #9 to be as powerful as a karate chop.


dohn121 profile image

dohn121 7 years ago from Hudson Valley, New York Author

@prettydarkhorse-Yes, there is much to uncover when Part 9 makes its debut...Next week! I won't reveal what happens next, for obvious reasons. I'll of course try not to let you down! Thank you, Maita. It's always great to hear what you think.

@Kiera7-It's great to hear that you found Part 8 waiting for you once you got back. It's always great to be home again after a long trip, isn't it? Thanks so much for the wonderful comment. I hope you enjoy your weekend as well :)

@dusanotes-Hello, Don. No, this isn't the ending yet (I'm not that cruel). I'm not sure as to exactly how many more parts there will be, but rest assured, it will be some time before the curtain closes. Thank you for the great comment! I sure hope that I could do this for a living!

@juneaukid-Ha! Thanks, juneaukid! I always look forward to hearing from you. Hopefully, I won't let you down! Until next time...


Enelle Lamb profile image

Enelle Lamb 7 years ago from Canada's 'California'

dohn - just finished this installment - great plot! I'm not sure if you check comments you leave on other hubs for answers, (lol I do - is that weird?) anyway, check out my answer to your last comment on my writing hub. Again - great story! Waiting for the next installment!


dohn121 profile image

dohn121 7 years ago from Hudson Valley, New York Author

Thanks, Enelle! I definitely will check out that out and yes, I usually do and rate the hub up again :) I really appreciate your following this story by the way.


alekhouse profile image

alekhouse 7 years ago from Louisville, Kentucky

Dohn, This is really the first time I've read any of your writing at length. I went back an read your earlier installments. Really good writing. Like the story line too.


Paradise7 profile image

Paradise7 7 years ago from Upstate New York

I'm wondering what comes next. This is a good story, and I guess it had to stick with the revenge theme. No forgiveness, but preparation for attack.

I guess I can understand why.

You've got me hooked. Can you tell?


dohn121 profile image

dohn121 7 years ago from Hudson Valley, New York Author

@alekhouse-Thank you for reading me. I'm happy to hear that you read the story from the very beginning (in truth I hope everyone does!). I appreciate the compliment!

@Paradise7-Just to hear that you're following this story means a lot to me. Your support of my writing is inspiring. Thank you so much for doing so. I'm glad that you are hooked as well :D


ralwus 7 years ago

Gripping and thrilling Dohn-san. The tension and excitement now builds as trouble has arrived anew upon the beach. I really anticipate something grand here. Now, as to the story written; I figure you may want to send this off to an editor for publishing. I will help you right now, 'I had to forced myself not to smile...' force. 9th para, second line down from picture. First one I have noticed. Thanks Dohn old boy! Have you had martial art training? Reads like it. CC


Lady_E profile image

Lady_E 7 years ago from London, UK

Oh my goodness... 12 Figures dressed in black. Now what?

Sounds like there is trouble ahead in the story.

Looking forward to reading how things will unravel.

Thanks and Well done on a captivating story. :)


dohn121 profile image

dohn121 7 years ago from Hudson Valley, New York Author

@ralwus-Ha! Thanks, Charles for letting me know when my fly's open! I did 'zip up' so to speak. Thanks for that great compliment. Your not the first to suggest that I submit this story...I certainly have more than three chapters, but before I do, I'll have to prepare a proposal package. As far as training goes, I've only trained in Judo and some Kung-Fu (two weeks, hahaha) but aside from that, I've not learn any other forms. However, I did watch a crap load of martial arts movies :D Thanks so much, kind sir.

@Lady_E-Yes, the mysterious figures are going to be very important in the upcoming installments. I'm happy to see that you are riveted! I expect to see you back here next week ;) Thank you so much for your compliment!


Pamela99 profile image

Pamela99 7 years ago from United States

dohn, Very good, much suspense. I think you could get this published.


dohn121 profile image

dohn121 7 years ago from Hudson Valley, New York Author

Thank you Pam. That would be amazing if I could. As many (of my audience) have suggested, I could also see this as a movie as well. Thank you for following this series.


SweetiePie profile image

SweetiePie 7 years ago from Southern California, USA

You definitely have a gift with words!


dohn121 profile image

dohn121 7 years ago from Hudson Valley, New York Author

Thank you for your kind words SweetiePie!


Justine76 7 years ago

Hi, me again. :) Yes it was awesome, I love the explination of the strength of the katana. Fire and hammering, to make something so bendable but unbreakable. Like life, huh? Also, I wanted to revise my previous comment just in case anybody else reads the comments. I appreciate your appreciating my comments, but before I said it was rare and after thinking about it I think maybe that was wrong, lots of people out there enjoy comments. So anyway, looking forward to the next chapter!


Useful Knowledge 7 years ago

It is so good. I can't wait untill part 9 comes out. I am so proud of you for sticking this out! You are such a great writer and I am so impressed with this story. I will always be your fan!!


Am I dead, yet? 7 years ago

Dohn--I waited as long as I could before I read this because I wanted to have the shortest wait time until the next installment--so I just said what the heck and read--I just cringe when I reach the end because I know that you will always leave such an ending that I would have to suffer until the next chapter. Damn it, Dohn!

"a man can be defeated in the blink of an eye" --damn it again, Dohn--philosophy lessons in your writing as well!


Shalini Kagal profile image

Shalini Kagal 7 years ago from India

Dohn - there's no flagging of the tempo, the excitement, the action. Just love it - bring on more!


dohn121 profile image

dohn121 7 years ago from Hudson Valley, New York Author

@Justine76-Hello, DM! There's no question. I enjoy and look forward to all your comments, my friend. You should know that. Yes, Master Akira's telling of the Katana is symbolic of its "master." Thanks again!

@Useful Knowledge-You know, I owe it to you for pushing me to continue writing this, otherwise, I would've stopped at Part One. Thank you so much, UK. You know how much it means to hear that from you.

@AIDY-Your opening sentence made me laugh. I tried doing the same thing with some other works as well and failed too ;) I'm glad to see you here and see that you "caved in" to temptation. It's great to hear your enthusiasm for this series! Thank you for the compliment! See you Friday???

@Shalini Kagal-I'm floored that so many Hubbers are enjoying this story! It's great to hear such a compliment, Shalini. I thank you.


cosette 7 years ago

WHOA....

anxiously awaiting the next installment!


cosette 7 years ago

oops duplicate. sorry, Dohn-san. ;)


dohn121 profile image

dohn121 7 years ago from Hudson Valley, New York Author

I usually erase duplicate comments, but I'm keeping this one, because of the humor! Thanks again, buddy!


RedElf profile image

RedElf 7 years ago from Canada

You have quite a story going here. Keep it coming!


dohn121 profile image

dohn121 7 years ago from Hudson Valley, New York Author

Thank you, RedElf. It's great to see that you're now following it!


Duchess OBlunt 7 years ago

dohn121, you have really captured the essence of how to write a series. You ALWAYS leave us hanging. What a great job. I can't wait to see what happens next. I'd love to get a peek at your notebook, but I will just have to wait like everyone else. :(


dohn121 profile image

dohn121 7 years ago from Hudson Valley, New York Author

Ha! Yes, unfortunately you'll have to. To be honest, half of the time, I'm not sure how it's going to go. I publish more than half of each installment within the last 3 hours or so! I do just work on my notes which are similar to storyboards and go from there. Thanks for the compliment. This is the first time I ever tried writing a story in this fashion.


Duchess OBlunt 7 years ago

Well keep it up, it's working!


dohn121 profile image

dohn121 7 years ago from Hudson Valley, New York Author

I'll tell you one thing, I wouldn't recommend anyone doing it the way I'm doing it...Hard liquor might be required :P


Cris A profile image

Cris A 7 years ago from Manila, Philippines

A Ninja fight! You tell the story very visually, makes it more entertaining. Keep 'em coming my friend. You have everybody hooked with a shiruken! :D


dohn121 profile image

dohn121 7 years ago from Hudson Valley, New York Author

Ha! Thanks, Cris. I'm finishing up Part 9 as I'm typing this. I hope I don't disappoint, but rest assured, much has to be established, because...Geez, just wait like everybody else ;) It's coming! LOL


girlpower profile image

girlpower 7 years ago from eugene oregon

as always good writing, loved the last narrative, descriptive and moved me.


dohn121 profile image

dohn121 7 years ago from Hudson Valley, New York Author

Thanks, girlpower! It's great to hear that you like it. Part 9 is published as well ;)


Truth From Truth profile image

Truth From Truth 6 years ago from Michigan

You really keep peoples attention. outstanding story Dohn. I am kind of glad I fell behind, now I can read one after the other. Thanks.


dohn121 profile image

dohn121 6 years ago from Hudson Valley, New York Author

Thanks, TFT. I don't think you're the only one. I think that some are actually waiting for me to finally end the story before they even begin! I always enjoy hearing your comments.


marcofratelli profile image

marcofratelli 6 years ago from Australia

Love the suspense...


dohn121 profile image

dohn121 6 years ago from Hudson Valley, New York Author

Thanks again Marco! See you soon!


rmcrayne profile image

rmcrayne 6 years ago from San Antonio Texas

Under attack!? I totally didn't see that coming!


dohn121 profile image

dohn121 6 years ago from Hudson Valley, New York Author

Gotcha again! Yes, the last thing I want to do with any of my stories is to NOT make them predictable (I actually take offense to that!). You're really catching up now! See you next installment?


Freya Cesare profile image

Freya Cesare 6 years ago from Borneo Island, Indonesia

The opening is predictable, but the closing indeed suprising. Next....

"Be like Katana... Be unbreakable."

I love this line.


dohn121 profile image

dohn121 6 years ago from Hudson Valley, New York Author

I'm so happy that you liked that line, Freya. In general, I really enjoyed writing Master Akira's lines. It was a pleasure to. Thanks again.


Mystique1957 profile image

Mystique1957 6 years ago from Caracas-Venezuela

My brother Dohn...

Another wonderful plot twist that spins this story into a whirlwind of new conflicts and the necessity of Cody to prove himself a worthy opponent.

Great storytelling! Thumbs up!

warmest regards and blessings,

Al


dohn121 profile image

dohn121 6 years ago from Hudson Valley, New York Author

Hey Al,

Thanks for continuing to read Revenge, Inc. I'm so happy that you like it! I hope that you don't stop now my friend as there's much to be read still ;) Thank you so much for the compliment! I couldn't ask for any more from you.

Warmest Regards,

Dohn


MyWebs profile image

MyWebs 6 years ago from Sheridan, WY

Wow you leave us hanging so well after each installment. I'm glad I'm so far behind so that I can go to the next one without having to wait. Expect much complaining once I get caught up though. :)

Please tell me you are still currently adding to this series. It must be eternal and never end, it's just too good to end!


dohn121 profile image

dohn121 6 years ago from Hudson Valley, New York Author

Yep, I'm still adding to this series, but I will be finished very soon! Keep in mind too that this is the first draft and there are a few scenes that I want to polish and couple of more that I would like to add.

Complain away, my friend! I'll be sure to listen! Thanks so much for the compliment. Even after this series is over, I might make a sequel or prequel. We'll see ;)


loveofnight profile image

loveofnight 6 years ago from Baltimore, Maryland

now i have to read further to find out what those black figures are, you set me up to go further......shame on you


dohn121 profile image

dohn121 6 years ago from Hudson Valley, New York Author

Ha! I love it when readers proceed to the next part (whether they have the time or not, haha). It's great to see that you're back at it again, loveofnight. Thank you.


valeriebelew profile image

valeriebelew 6 years ago from Metro Atlanta, GA, USA

Now, I guess the two of them will have to fight these guys in black, and it is a good thing Cody has improved his technique or his instructor would be on his own. LOL. Keeping the suspense going. Good job, dohn.


dohn121 profile image

dohn121 6 years ago from Hudson Valley, New York Author

Hey, Valerie. It's great to see that you're continuing to read this and so are catching up. I can't wait to see you at this story's end! Hope to hear from you soon! Thank you.


Just A Voice 6 years ago

It's been a long time...but I've finally made it back. Such a good story. I'm blazing through the chapters!


dohn121 profile image

dohn121 6 years ago from Hudson Valley, New York Author

Hey, JAV. It's great to hear back from you and that your reading like a madman! Awesome to hear.


Annabeth 6 years ago

Great Stuff! I love high-quality stories!


dohn121 profile image

dohn121 5 years ago from Hudson Valley, New York Author

Thank you, Annabeth! I'm glad you enjoyed this.

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