Garcia The Cat. And His Family . A Fantasy Tale.
Tuesday, January 31, 2012
Garcia the cat was and inventive sort of critter, and he was well known for his unique, tricky, and occasional deceptive little ways. He married a lovely French Italian dancer named Fiona.
One day while Garcia was browsing through the local classified section of "The Daily Wisdom" newsprint he caught sight of a really great deal on an old school bus that was for sale for only one hundred dollars so he had to run as fast as he could , and took off like lightening speed to " Bud Winks Used Cars And Vehicles ". And it was at Bud's place where Garcia called Fiona to bring the kittens to see if they liked the bus, and they did. The kitties were all excited, so thrilled, and happy that Bud gave an additional discount just for the kids, and dropped twenty five dollars from the original price tag . Fiona was excited when Garcia drove the large bus home by the front yard. Fortunately the local town police turned their heads the other way when they saw the old yellow bus because Garcia, and Fiona voted for the chief of police.
Fiona was happy because she knew that the kittens were going to school for mechanical engineering in the the first grade at " Fundamental Elementary School For Cats ," and educational outlet for poverty line kittens. The kittens barely had shoes to wear, but Fiona made it her business to quickly race to the Salvation Army Store right before the doors opened in order to buy the best mittens, jeans, cream , cheese crackers, toilet tissue, corn flakes, plastic spoons, cotton candy , watermelon seeds, hot dogs, cough drops, at low low prices. On Thursdays she stacked up on peanut butter, jam, paper plates, Prince Albert In A Can Tobacco for Garcia, powdered milk, ear ache medicine, rice, lip stick, and matches for Garcia's pipe .
Fiona pestered Garcia about his tobacco habit, but he insisted that he needed his bad habit to help him keep his weight down , but the kittens begged their father to stop smoking because Italian gravy with pasta could help him loose weight. The kittens were thrilled when their daddy said he would quit. The money could be used to buy delicious ravioli from large cans. The kittens loved ravioli with Rigatoni pasta noodles with ground beef chuck, and they loved lemon flavored ice tea. Dad's tobacco money could buy chocolate candy that Fiona liked as well.
Dad would have to settle for just beer on Sundays while watching football as his new habit.
The kittens worked hard on the bus. All of their seven kittens hauled tools to their dad while he repaired the transmission, carburetor, and over hauled a head gasket. The kittens also carried brand new spark plugs to their daddy. The kittens also painted the bus by hand with fine colored paint after they sanded it , and put primer on it.
Well finally the day arrived when Garcia, Fiona, and the kittens all jumped into their bus with camping gear, fishing poles, and brought along a grill to fry chicken. They planned on a weekend of swimming, and canoe riding too.
However the most important thing they needed was bus vehicle insurance so Garcia drove to Micky's Discount Insurance Company. Garcia noticed a parking spot in front of Micky's place so he stopped at a red light, and told Fiona to hold her foot on the brakes while he quickly raced to measure the parking space. In a flash Garcia took off like a streak of lightening with his tape measure, and precisely measured the parking spot in order to parallel park the bus, and made it back quickly to the bus before the light turned green . Garcia then turned the block , and then he began to parallel park. Perfectly he parked the bus, and he did not touch either bumpers of the two parked cars that he squeezed the bus in between. Garcia then took the ace of diamonds from a deck of cards and placed it between the bumpers, and said, " Fiona, I think we have plenty of room here so we may as well go and take the kittens to " Kitty's Cheese Burgers , and Milk Shakes Restaurant, " and so they did.
When meal time was over, the kittens , and Fiona crawled into their bus while Garcia noticed a scratch on the front bumper of their family transportation. " Lardy Lardy Lardy look at the size of that foot long scratch on our bumper," said Garcia, who was all upset as he marched right back into Micky's Insurance building to file a claim. The kittens and Fiona had their little cute noses pressed against the bus windows as they watched daddy raise hell by Micky's Insurance.
Micky could not believe it as he scratched his head in disbelief. The ink of the insurance papers was not even dry yet before Garcia filed a claim . The kittens, and Fiona wondered what was taking dad so long.
Finally the worry , and the heart throbbing task was over. Garcia the cat filed his claim , and soon and insurance adjuster would drive out in a few weeks to examine the scratched bumper.
As for the family, they all went camping, and two weeks later the insurance adjuster determined that the scratch could not be repaired so the bumper on the bus would have to be replaced which could cost as much as four hundred dollars , and an allowance of repair labor would be considered so Garcia received a check of seven hundred dollars. Well it turned out that instead of replacing the bumper, the family decided to spend the money on whatever they wanted to do with it.
Garcia gave the kittens , and his wife Fiona the seven hundred dollars , and they invested the money wisely in stocks in the stock market. And it turned out that the kittens became really good at wheeling, and dealing just like their daddy, and over the years they eventually earned one hundred million dollars on Wall Street.
As for the bus, the family decided to keep it parked on their beautiful patio. You see they had and extraordinarily modern place of residence where they loved playing in their bus whenever they felt like it.
God Bless Everyone.