Furniture Fit For Kings and Queens!

 I like to live in an online fantasy world, and whenever I'm at work, sometimes I get bored and go looking at multi million dollar homes on the Internet. Although I couldn't even afford the taxes on these homes, they are still a real pleasing orgasm to the eyes.

Houses with indoor pools, indoor balconies, decks made of marble, bedrooms the size of standard 1 family homes and instead of a parking spot, these homes come with lots.Fine lots, with golden colored brick gates, and initials embedded in the stone of some fine Italian brick building company; or the rich homeowner- I've yet to figure out which?

I drool at the lives of these people, andI wonder what they do for a living. Trust fund babies, oil investors, royalty, stock genuises, or maybe lawsuit case winners?

I imagine what it must be like to walk home and open a door that is literately two stories high. I imagine sleeping in their king tut beds, and swimming in their year round piss warm pools, and I imagine wiping my ass with those watering can things. Ahh... it must be the life.

Today I was exceptionally bored at work, and I went on my imaginary shopping spree for fine imported furniture's. Some from France, so from Italy, and some made from only the rarest of exotic rain forest trees (I'm so against that though, but in my imaginary rich world... I'm soo okay with it! Ugh, I make myself sick). 

I always make sure I browse such sites when I'm at work, where my fellow employees can watch as I browse these exquisite furniture sites.  like to imagine that perhaps they think I can afford such things... la la... oh course dah'ling, kiss, kiss. I'm a secretary.

At any rate I came across a few spectacular pieces I thought I would share with my fellow readers. Here is the first one below... I'm charmed!!!

This lovely bed is part of the Tuscano Collection, retails at a jaw dropping $1,700 for a queen size, or $1,929 for King size.
This lovely bed is part of the Tuscano Collection, retails at a jaw dropping $1,700 for a queen size, or $1,929 for King size.

See that bed. My, my, my. Had I a bed like that I'd never wake up. This one is the bed of all beds. A bed for a queen, for my royal secretary ass.

Sadly, for this secretary, this bed would cost me a whoppin $1,700. I could possibly afford it, true, but my room would literately bust at the walls if I dare squeeze this charmer into it.

In my fantasy world though, this bed is just too cheap. Good God, what a rag. I'd have my maid sleep in this ugly thing.

'Hampton Court' Mansion Bedroom Collection By Collezione Europa
'Hampton Court' Mansion Bedroom Collection By Collezione Europa

 Oh, wow this is a nice bedroom set, it would simply look divine in my fantasy mansion. Still though, it's not quite the 'IT' bed for the level of richness I fantasize about. It would though make a killer set for my butler.

Monte Carlo Queen Poster Canopy Bed Medium Brown Finish $2,809.00
Monte Carlo Queen Poster Canopy Bed Medium Brown Finish $2,809.00

Well, well, well, this is mighty expensive for my secretary's wage, but if I were rich royalty, this bed would be suiting. However, I think I could do better...hmm...lemme dig a little deeper.

Villa Valencia Grande Marble King Size Poster Canopy Bed Classic Chestnut Finish $4,839.00
Villa Valencia Grande Marble King Size Poster Canopy Bed Classic Chestnut Finish $4,839.00

 Va...va...va...room!!! Now that's what I'm talking about. A bed I could sink my rump into, a bed where all worried would be absorbed by the fine imported rare woods it is carved of. A bed where dreams would be of swimming in Scrooge's money vault, a bed that screams, 'look at me, so fluffy and warm, and expensive! Come lie down, and never wake up, sleeping beauty.'

Hell, I'd feel awkward just laying in this thing. I get goosebumps just looking at it.

Still though, in my rich fantasy world, Paris Hilton would call this a bed for a poor girl. So it's close; but no cigar... not in my fantasy world. This one gets an A- though. An E for effort.

Chateau Beauvais Queen Panel Bed $2,425.00
Chateau Beauvais Queen Panel Bed $2,425.00

 If I had a kid, this would be his bed, or hers. Which ever. A bed for a royal pain in the spoiled keester. A bed for a prince, or princess. It's nice, kinda reminds me of a lion. Big, bright, and mean to the core.

I could get lost in this bed myself; telling bedtime stories to the walls that would listen.

Janjaap Ruijssenaars 1.6 Million Dollar Magnetic Bed
Janjaap Ruijssenaars 1.6 Million Dollar Magnetic Bed

 Now that's what I'm talking about. Here it is, my bed. It's not as snazzy as the carved wood beds you see above, but seeing that it has some sort of health benefits, and it is the world's most expensive bed, I dub this my bed...in my fantasy world that is!

This one floats in the air, and is suspended in place using cables attached to the floor.

I imagine the cables would get in the way, and would likely cause a few trips... or worse, one snaps and cuts me in half; but still I would have this dangerous bed all for myself. Muah, all mine, mine, mine I tell you! Mine!

Cortina Rectangular Dining Table Set Honey Walnut Finish
Cortina Rectangular Dining Table Set Honey Walnut Finish

 Oh and this...this would totally be my dining room set.

Excelsior TV Entertainment Wall Unit Rich Dark Fruitwood Finish $3,829.00
Excelsior TV Entertainment Wall Unit Rich Dark Fruitwood Finish $3,829.00

 Check out my killer home entertainment set though. Tra..la...la...Ohh...Lah, la...

 

And then she wakes up. Sniff, sniff.

Back to my world of piss stained used mattresses, and hand me down blankeys, oh and can't forget them free roadside couch's. We're due for a new one soon.

Haha. It's fun to dream though.

 

 

 

Sources:

www.greatpricedfurniture.com

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Comments 14 comments

goldentoad profile image

goldentoad 7 years ago from Free and running....

I want a bed, one day when I'm rich and famous, that's like an Ultimate Fighting Octagon cage. No escape, and no pain, no gain.


MellasViews profile image

MellasViews 7 years ago from Earth Author

OMG, they have the bed you speak of on extremecoture.com I think. Its a real piece of a UFC fighting cage. Some rich bastard probably already bought it up though, I think it was a one of a kind.


goldentoad profile image

goldentoad 7 years ago from Free and running....

I shall kill him or at least hurt him enough so that he gives it to me.


MellasViews profile image

MellasViews 7 years ago from Earth Author

found it....

a tappout cage bed. lol. http://shop.tapout.com/index.cfm?fa=Shop.detail&am...

thatll run yah ninefitty


MellasViews profile image

MellasViews 7 years ago from Earth Author

Its all yours. When I hit the lottery, or find my real royal parents, this one is all yours. My word is my bond.... ; )


MellasViews profile image

MellasViews 7 years ago from Earth Author

but when you become el presidente, you have to make weed free, and leagalized. m-kay. deal?


goldentoad profile image

goldentoad 7 years ago from Free and running....

Deal.


MellasViews profile image

MellasViews 7 years ago from Earth Author

I cannot make out what it is clearly, but it looks like your new picture is a toad in a toilet. lol.


Lgali profile image

Lgali 7 years ago

wow nice one


MellasViews profile image

MellasViews 7 years ago from Earth Author

Thanks... I wish I could have them all... or just one. Sigh... I should maybe whiddle my own bed from wood or something. Itd take a few years, but its be my own homemade whiddled bed. : )


ANNIE HALL 7 years ago

SEND OUT PHOTOS . THANK YOU FRIENDADDRESS I AM INTERESTED IN YOUR FURNITURE ,MY ADDRESS IS 3870 SOUTH BUDLONG AVE LA CAL 90037 PLEASE


7 years ago

Just google the name of the pieces you like, there should be a local dealer nearby.


little miss sunshine 6 years ago

It can be real. Many of the furniture I have bought for my new house looks like this and I didn't pay such a huge price. I just found a good carpenter and had most of it done. And let me tell you 5 years ago I didn't even dream of it.


Constentina 5 years ago

LMFAO!!!! That was awesome writing!!! I was so entertained by this story I just had to leave a comment and tell you so...perhaps maybe your fortune lies in writing! totally awesome to whoever wrote this entertaining piece!!! love it!

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