What do you know? Proper English IS important in money-making Hubs!
wuzup wit u? how u ben? wut u doin 2maro? wna cbr?
Chatspeak is just soooooo attractive, isn't it?
And yet people use it anyway.
For the life of me, I cannot understand why proper English has died, not only within my own generation, but with the older ones as well. I've seen many a learned man and woman turn to chatspeak and "n00blish" in an attempt to speed up their WPM (word per minute) and get texts out faster, and to seem more at ease with their younger coworkers, family members, and peoples of society.
It's a wasted effort, but they do it anyway.
The problem is, it makes the younger kiddies think that this chatspeak thing is good, and that it's worth typing like 5 year old imbeciles. And it makes the older peers thing it's alright to learn this "hip" new language.
There is nothing hip about it. There is nothing cool about it. There is no worthwhile point in using it or learning it.
So why do people use it on their hubs and websites?
Simple: they think they can attract a bigger audience.
But don't let this erratic train of thought run you down! You don't have to type like a moron to get a higher hub score or more clicks off Google!
THERE IS HOPE, AND IT IS IN THE FORM OF PROPER ENGLISH!
Let me tell you a few ways you can improve your English quickly, write articles that don't hurt others to read, just possibly make a little more moolah on your hubs and websites, and maybe get yourself into college. And if you are in college or have been in college ... Why in the world are you typing like that?!
Okay, bad joke. But still, we're gonna try and reform you anyway. :-D
Spell Check is your friend.
Hell yeah it is! Spell check has got to be the best friend any semi-illiterate fool can have! I know that's a bit harsh, but it's a fact. Even us elite literate nerds use it when we have to.
Microsoft Office & Works word processors have spell checks in them that also come with grammar checks and a thesaurus.
... What do you mean, "What's a thesaurus?"
A thesaurus is kind of like a dictionary. The difference is it'll give you words with the same meaning, or close to the same meaning, as the word you're using. So instead of calling someone "stupid," you can call them "an idiot," "a moron," "an imbecile," "a pathetic excuse for oxygen waste..." Alright, that last one's mine, so don't go and steal it, okay? Point is, it makes the written work more interesting by using a variety of words instead of using the same one over and over and over.
The grammar check is nice, too. It will tell you if you have proper punctuation, syntax, form, and chronological tense (meaning you're not using "has" when you should be using "had").
Basically, spell check is your own personal editor. But you'll still want someone else to go through your work to make sure it flows, as well as checking for fragments (which most spell checks have) and good verbage. We'll talk about flow later.
Watch what you say.
Do all your sentences start with the same word? Do you want to sound like your vocabulary's less than 50? Do you even know you're using the same word for the first word of your sentences?
Depending on your written piece, you want to avoid repeating the same word or word phrase over and over with every sentence. If it's to emphasize a point, sure, that's fine. But if it's every single flippin' sentence, you need to change that. It gets old fast.
This might work well for you if you're going into journalism for the county newspaper, though; the average reading level of an average newspaper is equivalent to 6th grade books, so you won't have to worry too much about big words and fancy sentences.
Also, remember who your audience is. If you're aiming for the teen crowd, stick to their lingo (to an extent). Don't go off on some scientific study verbage if you're writing a children's novel, and vice versa; writing for a very intellectual group of adults should take some intelligence on your part. This is a great place for that thesaurus we talked about earlier.
Don't drag the audience along.
Some people don't have a problem with this; they're able to tell an anecdote and then continue on into their piece. Others go on and on and on with no end in sight, before coming to the point. By then, people have lost interest in whatever it was you wanted to tell them, and only those determined to read your work are going to push themselves to continue.
I know I have one hub where I did this, and I had someone point it out to me. I'm very grateful they did, because I would have never thought someone wouldn't read what I had to say. Then again, I'm extremely full of myself when it comes to my writing (just go ask my mother; she'll completely agree with me here).
If you do drag on and catch it in time, try breaking the section up a bit. You can move a paragraph or two to another section, or you can delete some you find may not be necessary to the article or piece you're writing. Not everyone wants to hear about your Great Aunt Sally.
Go with the flow.
Flow is everything. Literally.
If your work doesn't flow, it's going to be a long and bumpy road for the reader. And not many readers like long and bumpy roads in their reading.
You want the sentences and paragraphs to flow effortlessly. This can take some time to understand and maybe more time to perfect, but once you've got the hang of it, people will line up to read your handiwork. Think about it this way:
Imagine you're telling your best friend a story. You tell her one part, then jump to what seems like a completely irrelevent part, then jump back to the second part, then jump to another part... and it continues until you reach the end of your story. Your friend then asks you a bunch of questions about said story, and you get frustrated and say, "Why didn't you listen to me the first time? I already explained that."
Your friend didn't understand because the story didn't flow.
You have to consider the fact that your reader may not know what it is you're trying to tell them. If you start talking about, say, boat motors, then move to a paragraph about how to pull an intertube behind your boat, then go on to something about boat lights, you're going to confuse your reader. Sporadic train of thought is fun and all, but not when you're trying to convey a point. You must keep your thoughts clear and concise and to the point. A few bits about a hilarious boat trip you had might be nice to add, but consider doing it after you finish the first draft of the article, and put parts of the boat trip story in with parts of the article the story can help explain.
Flow is everything. If you can't make your article flow, you probably need help.
Where can I get more help?
It's a good thing I thought to put this in here.
Most communities have things like Community Education classes anyone can take for a small fee, or even free courses. They can range anywhere from simple animal vet care (such as signs your dog is sick or your horse needs new shoes) to making crafts like candles and homemade furniture, to language courses. They can be through colleges in your area or just average people volunteering to teach others what they know.
Most Comm. Ed. curriculums contain courses on English and writing skill training. They are wonderful classes to consider if you're still having trouble with writing. Some will even have more specific courses oriented towards genres of writing or types of writing, or even writing styles you can learn and use. It's up to you what you want to learn.
If worse comes to worse, there's always online textbooks and help aids.
So, have you abandoned your old ways?
Are you done with that lame chatspeak notion? Have you moved away from the txt talk of today? I really hope so, because if I have to deal with one more idiot telling me to "chillax" or "stfu ur bein a nurd", I'm going to have to commit mass genocide.
... ... It was a joke, people... ...
Point is, proper English does mean a lot in today's world, even though emphasis on it has dwindled to dang near nothing. Please help keep the true English language alive with me, and may your future writings be worthy of Hawthorne himself. :-D
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