How to not come a millionaire in 30 days

This intends to be a funny hub, if you really want to become a millionaire this hub can give some ideas how other people are famous and other are rich, but you are special and such as special person you should find your own way to make money.

Day 1 - Buy a lottery ticket;

Day 2 - Cut an ear and sell paintings;

Day 3 - Make a video-song and put it on YouTube;

Day 4 - Search for your family tree to see if there is anyone rich;

Day 5 - Seek rich people and try to share their wealth;

Day 6 - Try to contact Pitbull and do the Day 3 song with him;

Day 7 - Try a sport in which you are good and get paid;

Day 8 - Sell what you have;

Day 9 - Create an website;

Day 10 - Create an Adult Website;

Day 11 - Tell your neighbours you need money to buy something for the street;

Day 12 - Look for cats and photograph them;

Day 13 - Video record cats and other animals;

Day 14 - Start trading in the Stock Exchange;

Day 15 - Take photos of yourself;

Day 16 - Walk all day;

Day 17 - Go to Hollywood;

Day 18 - Go to a magic fountain;

Day 19 - Go to an airport and help tourists

Day 20 - Bite a journalist in the ear

Day 21 - Start a new art movement

Day 22 - Do the Dadaism of 21st century

Day 23 - Break a Guinness record

Day 24 - Sell sticks and garbage;

Day 25 - Sell Fresh Air in a bottle;

Day 26 - Help people with car parking;

Day 27 - Put a Parking Meter somewhere;

Day 28 - Find a rich person to marry with;

Day 29 - Sell things that aren't yours;

Day 30 - Buy Monopoly;

Day 31 - Play monopoly while you wait...

The magical numbers are out there
The magical numbers are out there

Day 1 - Buy Lottery Ticket

You have to start by something, so how about buying the lottery and trying to be a millionaire by the easy way.

The probability may be low but it's start.

You can do it today, just go outside and do it, but spend just a little, since you will need the money for food and others.

Day 2 - Cut a ear and sell paintings

Years ago there was a painter that cut his ear, but still he died without being known. You can be an alive Vincent van Gogh.

Maybe cutting a ear is too violent, but it will be hard to think of something new, since there are already people painting with rotten tomatoes, poo, tongue and other kind of eccentricity.

My suggestion is painting with crayons, your competitors will be kids... or Jeffrey Robert (I discovered him as I am writing).

Maybe you should appear on Ebay with a fake ear cut and the painting next to you.

Day 3 - Make a video-song and put it on YouTube

Choose a famous song and do a video of it, preferably with you as the star. Something unique.

As an inspirational video I will put here the "Wrecking Ball" by Portuguese Nursing Home. It got more than 100k views.

Day 4 - Search for your family tree to see if there is anyone rich

Now that you have bought the lottery and tried your artistic vein, time to do a little search. Do your own family tree and search for rich cousins, even if you only share a great-great-...-great parent with them.

After that, you can go to their house as family.

Now good luck trying to be rich, you will probably find you are related to your wife than to a rich person.

Day 5 - Seek rich people and try to share their wealth;

Do what Non-Profit organization do, search for THE money but then you don't spend it on what you are supposed.

Go talk to rich people and tell them a story that you need money to do something big, like a statue for them or sculpting their face in a beach. Wait for their reaction.

Day 6 - Try to contact Pitbull and do the Day 3 song with him;

You have already done a video song on the 3rd day, so now it is time to contact someone famous and do the same, but with a famous person in the video.

If you cannot contact or the famous people cannot be reached, you can always try to Photoshop them in your video.

The perfect way to ski...
The perfect way to ski...

Day 7 - Try a sport in which you are good and get paid;

Are you good in any famous sport? Even if it only exists in other country, you can always try to be a professional, after that you just have to do something unique to be famous and start appearing in the ads.

The problem here is entering the sport. Football (soccer) is one of the cheapest ways and has lots of fans in Europe or you can try something like Ski, and wear a unique outfit to get you famous. Something like in the picture...

If you are good playing curling or throwing rocks, probably it will be very hard for you to get famous and money.

Day 8 - Sell what you have;

You already tried seven different things to do and none worked. I guess it is time to be a merchant and start selling things that you have. Anything that you have at your house or with your probably can be sold on eBay or craigslist.

It is time to do it, start your way to get rich and go on a selling spree.

You will end up with nothing but money, and after that, you may want to buy some clothes. Still I guess there are things no one will buy, but you never know, your used underwear could be very valuable to other people, specially if not clean.

Day 9 - Create an website;

Everyone talks about how you can earn money with an website or a blog. I guess it is time to start one.

I will just give you some links on hubpages. Can you think of something unique and creative? Like a special website for salesman calendars.

Day 10 - Create an Adult Website;

You have already learnt to create a website but your idea does not seem profitable... time for something more spicy.

Nowadays adult websites are not as famous as before, but they will exist forever so you will create something that will always have interest.

Now that your creativity came with several ideas, remember that an adult website can always be about moms taking care of children, I said an website for adults not some necessary spicy.

Hear some music while you become a millionaire

Day 11 - Tell your neighbors you need money to buy something for the street

This is easier if you live with lots of neighbors. Living on a street or in a building this is always achievable.

Find something that would make everyone like easier, like a street lamp or a carpet in the building entrance. Now that you have something to ask money for, go to your neighbors and start collecting money for this "special request".

After doing your work, you have two possibilities, flee with the money or buy something cheaper and keep the rest of the money.

If you want to do it large scale, become a politician and you can tax!!!

Day 12 - Look for cats and photograph them

Cats... one of the most famous animals on the internet. You can finds thousands of images and videos of them over the internet and several dedicated websites.

Now it is time for you to take some time and start taking photos of them, after that you have to share. The only problem for you is to get rich or famous... maybe you should put your face in the cat's face.

Getting rich will come when you do an ad for a cat food brand, so be prepared for anything, maybe you will be the one eating cat food.

You could be the one capturing this moment.
You could be the one capturing this moment.

Day 13 - Video record cats and other animals

You have taken thousands and thousands of photos and they have taken you nowhere... time for plan B. Start video recording their stupidities, but now, for any animals that you see.

Who knows what will you find, maybe a cat hunting a pigeon or a seagull flying with a cow (maybe this one is hard.)

Day 14 - Start trading in the Stock Exchange

There are many rich people that made their fortune on the stock exchange, why don't you give it a try?

The problem here is that you have to have money and there is a risk to lose it all. Since you want to be a millionaire, you have to think big, so risk it all, but always act informed.

You can always try illicit ways, like inside information, you may go to jail, but you get free food and healthcare!

Day 15 - Take photos of yourself

You just spent everything on the stock exchange and lost almost everything? No problem, time to use your camera (or a friends, or a tourist) and take pictures of yourself.

Your body and face can be something useful and maybe sold for artists.

Getting famous can be easy, just try to be everywhere or put your photo on the street, people will think "who is this?" and soon your face will be known.

Now you just have to convince someone that you are famous.

Day 16 - Walk all day

This one may seem award (the other ideas are perfectly normal) but walking all day may turn you famous and a commercial person, like "The Day Walker". So how can you use that for your profit?

Start selling advertising on your cloths, companies are always searching for new ways to promote their products. If you can reach companies like Nike or Adidas for shoes, they will probably want to advertise in you, with the logo "365 days walking and counting".

The sky is the limit and there are several options, you can be dressed as "The Johnnie Walker" or promoting a new movie. Just give it a try, it is simple.

Day 17 - Go to Hollywood

This one may seems expensive if you live outside the US. However it is not impossible, just try to hitchhike and get there somehow, you will have an amazing story to tell.

When you get to Hollywood you can start trying to sell your story, or just try to be a secondary actor, or maybe start simply by cleaning the streets of the famous.

You are in one of the most famous places around the world, but now you have to profit from that.

The first thing is to dress properly, if you want large tips, start dressing properly and accordingly, now you just have to be somewhere parking cars or swiping the floor to people (start by the less famous). Maybe in one year you will be living with a millionaire... cleaning their house.

The Trevi Fountain
The Trevi Fountain

Day 18 - Go to a magic fountain

Time to try your luck again. It seems the lottery ticket gave you nothing, so in the eighteenth day you can just go to a magic fountain, throw a coin and make a wish.

If you are considering taking money from the magic fountain, it is probably too much coins and not so much money as you may expect. Except the Trevi fountain in Rome.

Day 19 - Go to an airport and help tourists

This one can be hardworking and it can be quite difficult living in a city without tourists.

First step is going to the arrivals and wait for tourists. Now you have to convince them to give you money which can be hard. Tell you are a specialist in something. You can also just move bags from one place to another and expect tips, look for bigger and rich looking baggage, like LV and Hermes, they will probably tip you more.

The problem here is tourists are normally well informed and don't believe a random stranger will help them.

Day 20 - Bite a journalist in the ear

First step is to find a journalist, preferably he will be live on Television. It is your chance to attack and be famous.You can be known as the crazy one that attacked a journalist but you have an opportunity to appear on television and be known worldwide.

After that make some YouTube videos biting fake ears (real ones can hurt) to continue this interest in you. Try to monetize all that viewers and call yourself the Ear Terror. Do this very fast, since in nowadays society you will be forgotten in less than two weeks.

Day 21 - Start a new art movement

Let's call it the John Doedoism, but you can call it whatever you want, put your name of the name of the famous president an say this is something new, helped by someone famous. You can also say it was first started by someone who already died, this will help to get prices a bit higher.

Now you just have to do art. First you need materials, just get something and start gluing, just do something and wait for the final result, don't think too much. Now that you have something (and that seems the appropriate word) decide how you will name it, maybe something as a food.

Now that you have your garbage all glued and called it "The Shrimp", say it is a way to see food in another way, wait for the intellectuals to call it a critic to the famine in Africa and so on...

Marcel Duchamp, Fountain, 1917. A symbol of Dadaism.
Marcel Duchamp, Fountain, 1917. A symbol of Dadaism.

Day 22 - Do the Dadaism of 21st century

If your own art movement has not any followers, try something that already exists, and Dadaism seems the best solution.

Day 23 - Break a Guinness record

The first step to break a Guinness world record is probably visit their website, and search for something you could do, probably something like "Most time spent cleaning a plate" or "Biggest homemade Cookie".

These two would probably not get you on the Guinness Record, so you should just search and think of something, on the end you will be in the Guinness and can sign a sponsorship deal. Think of something like "CarWashLiquid helps John on the Most clean car of the year".

Day 24 - Sell sticks and garbage

Time to get out of your house, start collecting things you see on the street like sticks and garbage people throw outside.

Now that you have a stock of products, dress well and categorize them as special products. A wood-stick can be a special home made broom and a soda can may be a special WiFi amplifier.

You have the products and you are well-dressed, time to start selling these things, sell them on ebay, go to stores, try selling them door to door (this can be hard nowadays). Just try to be everywhere selling that.

Day 25 - Sell Fresh Air in a bottle

For this one you have to make an investment in bottles, but you can always make some profit. Do an essence based on a park, go to the park with the bottles and fill them with air, now you have bottles with pure air from the park or the countryside.

Now that you have your house full of air bottles, sell them online as a special essence. After selling everything you should probably close your new business, people will not buy that twice.

Day 26 - Help people with car parking

Car parking can be quite difficult for some people, so helping them and expecting a tip can be the solution to you money problems. If you want to be a millionaire, just park more and in expensive neighborhoods.

As always dress well, a well dressed person is more likely to receive a bigger tip. Now go to a place where there is always people parking, so you have clients all day. You can also try to go near office buildings during the peak hours, there will be lots of potential clients to help.

You are now one day closer to become a millionaire, but probably only a dollar or two in the wallet.

Day 27 - Put a Parking Meter somewhere

This is a crazy idea that already gave money to someone else, it is based on a true story that I cannot find.

The method was simple, buy a parking meter and put it somewhere that people park. Now you just have to pass by unnoticed by the police and other people that may complain.

The other people, Drivers, have to believe that they are paying because they have to, so the meter has to be well located, not just in the middle of the street.

This can be a bit illegal, but you already tried twenty six different things.

Alba Duchess and her husband
Alba Duchess and her husband

Day 28 - Seek a millionaire to marry you

By this time you will be desperate, you have done so many things and nothing happens in your bank account. It is time to take a short cut, you will not become a millionaire, you will stick to one.

It is time to start lowering your standards and seek someone with money. If you are desperate to become a millionaire, this is now the easiest way to do it. Lose part of your self-esteem and go for it. The best part will come when you can spend all that money.

Day 29 - Sell things that aren't yours

Time to sell everything, but not yours. Start selling things on eBay that you don't have but you know where to find them.

If you are desperate sell flowers from your street or green food (lawn from your neighbor).

It is time to make money, there is something you will buy on day 30...

Day 30 - Buy Monopoly;

Time to give up and buy the Monopoly game. It is the only way for you to become a millionaire.

Day 31 - Play monopoly while you wait...

Just play monopoly and fill a millionaire with lots of houses and streets, and if you play alone, you are the owner of everything, even a bank.

After that, sign up for Hubpages and enjoy your life, you will find many ways to be happy and even earn some money for living.

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