Welcome to my eBay

Great New for Shoppers

Here's great news: I have accepted eBay as an advertiser on my hubs. Patrons of my work will now have access to a veritable plethora of amazing bargains. Anyone browsing my writing will find a universe of new and used items for sale at mind bogglingly low prices. If you haven't heard of eBay, please read on: you will learn more about this amazing web site. If you have heard of eBay, please read on anyway because you probably have nothing else to do anyway.

What's the catch? There's no catch. You don't have to place a sign in your yard or sign up for a contract. No salesman will call. No application is required. All you need to do is peruse my hubs to experience a galaxy of purchasing opportunities. eBay and I accept PayPal and all major credit cards.

We are pleased to be joined together in this ballet of capitalism. Everyone will benefit, especially me and eBay. You, as the active participant in this process, have the opportunity to get in on the ground floor of our nascent relationship. Don't miss the boat. Don't be left on the pier when the boat sails. Climb aboard for our journey to Profitability Bay and the Auction Islands. This will be no three-hour cruise: The Skipper and Gilligan are not on our crew.

Any questions? Good. Prepare for the sale of your lives. Welcome to my eBay.

Cars

My eBay is replete with used cars. Feel free to wander the lot for hours. You'll never know what you'll find because the inventory changes in real time. Cars come and go like sitcoms on NBC. A used car offers much more economy than a nasty overpriced new car. Someone else has already paid the astronomical depreciation and breathed in all that new car smell that probably causes some mild form of euphoria, but only for a little while until the payment book arrives.

Tools

Every cool tool is available in my eBay store. Look no further for exotic pliers, screwdrivers, wrenches, and really straight nails. Throw in a toolbox to carry everything back to your double-wide. No tool is too old or too new to be found on my shelves. Antique tools are one of our specialties. When an estate sale occurs on an estate, my buyers are there. They eagerly acquire examples of classic hand tools and power tools that will complement your collection of such. Shop 'til you drop, then stop by the snack bar for a hot dog and a walking taco.

Sports

Be a good sport: pay a visit to my sporting goods department. Left-handed tennis rackets abound. Over-sized swim fins and camouflage bathing suits in all sizes will tickle the fancy of even the most ardent shoppers. Online shopping at my eBay store represents an experience like no other. Don't be a dumbbell: shop my comprehensive selection of dumbbells.

Computers

Everyone needs a computer. Actually, everyone needs about 10 computers, so my eBay store stocks about 10 computers for every man woman and child with a credit card. Spend a leisurely weekend perusing my selection of used hard drives or choose from a wide array of USB flash drives disguised as cartoon characters and presidential candidates.

Want to go online? Many people do. My selection of routers, switches, and patch cables will inspire you to wire up your neighborhood and provide Internet service to total strangers. You'll never tun out of items from which to choose.

DVDs

People watch DVDs. Actually, they can't see the actual DVD because it's spinning on a little tray inside the 'DVD Player' but people enjoy watching the data stored on the DVD after it's passed through special hardware and software that translate the binary information into a full-motion video referred to as a 'movie.' Regardless of your level of technical expertise, my eBay store contains oodles of used and new DVDs guaranteed to be round and flat at the same time. Most will play on your computer, your phone, your car, and probably even your pacemaker if you have the proper drivers.


Antiques

People like old stuff, such as furniture or Andy Rooney. Depend on my eBay store to stock more antique items than you can possibly jam into a storage locker that you will forget about and eventually it will be sold to scavengers on a reality TV show. It could happen.

Old coins, old clothes, and old books can all be found on my eBay pages. We are extremely pleased to offer a Very Special collection of extremely old antiques that are extremely valuable but we are selling them anyway, to you. Take advantage of us before we come to our senses.

Survival Gear

For some odd reason, survival gear has emerged as an astoundingly popular product line and we sincerely want to cash in on the craze before the world ends and we get stuck with too much inventory. We plan to be around, selling our eBay stuff, long after the apocalypse, but you'll have a tough time finding us if you're eking our a meager survival by scrounging for discarded recyclables in a burned-out major city.

Set yourself up with quality survival gear from my eBay store, then worry about the end of the world in a more relaxed frame of mind.

Thanks for shopping

I honestly look forward to serving .01% of you. We will have a great time together.

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Comments 7 comments

drbj profile image

drbj 4 years ago from south Florida

I have been waiting anxiously for this news, nicomp. Could that heavy bag stand be used to tether a rambunctious kid?

I'm referring to a young goat, of course.


nicomp profile image

nicomp 4 years ago from Ohio, USA Author

@drbj: my eBay does not presume to judge. How you restrain your livestock not our concern.


Scribenet profile image

Scribenet 4 years ago from Ontario, Canada

nicomp..You are my Hero. I never could fathom how I would be able to "sell" an eBay capsule...I love your approach...is it patented? I want to copy it shamelessly...lol


Austinstar profile image

Austinstar 4 years ago from Somewhere in the universe

I'm speechless.


nicomp profile image

nicomp 4 years ago from Ohio, USA Author

@Scribenet: Thank you for your kind words. Your concern is also a puzzlement for me. If the eBay listings are dynamic, as auctions expire, I'm not sure how to write the copy. The Amazon hubs are pretty easy for me to bang out, but I've sold next to nothing so evidently the rest of the world doesn't get it...

@Austinstar: You're welcome!


sheila b. profile image

sheila b. 4 years ago

I love a sense of humor!


nicomp profile image

nicomp 4 years ago from Ohio, USA Author

@sheila b.: gIVE US AN aVATAR!

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