I'm sure you've heard this one too many times now... get it on paper...
Pen and paper is the most effective way to climb out of debt... not your bank, not your broker, no negotiations...
Pen and paper... You are having such a hard times because you are yet to settle your mind, to recollect your thoughts from their idleness of nothing and focus on this particular area: Income versus Expense IN WRITING.
If you, as of today play by ear in regards to your family budget, you are driving onto a cliff.
This is what I do to keep my finances under control:
1) I have a book set out for this... A Financial Diary. I normally sit down at it once a month, writing down my plan for that particular month (if I want to do some car repair, or celebrate someone's birthday).
2) If something else comes up during that month I try to put it off for next month, unless is an emergency.
3) I have a savings plan for yearly expenses, like car registration renewal, back to school and Christmas expenses.
4) Beware of the little splurges. Those small take-out orders, eat outs, movie nights and the like are all classic budget killers!
Above all, make sure where do you want to be in regards to your budget. Serves no point to try to be elsewhere when you have no clue of precisely where that is :)...
Thank you for the question, I can feel a hub brewing! :D