48th Weekly Pop Awards Acceptance Speeches
Hello, I’m David Axelrod; I’m here to accept this award on behalf of Obama Motors; I mean General Motors. As you are aware our Chairman just quit; something about the label Obama Motors hurting sales, so I’m here to tell you just as was the case during the good old bail out days; we’re not interested in sales or, God Forbid Profits, we’re only interested in protecting our UAW jobs. After all that’s what the buyout was predicated upon. As far as investing 500 million dollars to produce a new vehicle as well as 8 cylinder engines in a plant in northeastern Mexico; all I can say is we had to figure out a way to repay Mexican President Felipe Calderon for his support in our condemnation of Arizona for its recent passage of that outrageous Immigration Law. After all to prosecute anyone on the basis of their illegality is; well illegal!
Hello, I’m Bill Weir, the former co-host of weekend GMA and now the anchor of Nightline; and I’m ABC president David Westin. We’re both in agreement with the seagull reference but let us further elaborate from whence it came. All of you are aware of the three most distinguishing characteristics of the seagull which exemplify Barrack Hussein Obama. Seagulls spend their days eating, defecating and squawking; Barrack Hussein Obama spends his days eating; defecating on the American People and squawking. So in conclusion we would just like to add, Barrack we’re the wind beneath your wings so keep soaring and dropping those waste bombs on the American People.
Hello Darlings; I’m back; my name of course is Dianne Sawyer and I’m here on behalf of ABC News; and I’m Tom Brokaw from NBC News. We can both state unequivocally that George Bush corrupted Rosty. Sure Rosty lifted a few harmless stamps but after all he was Chairman of the Ways and Means Committee and he was from Chicago. Rosty thought the Chairmanship of the Ways and Means gave him the Ways to establish his means! As for our personal knowledge of good ole Rosty; he’s supplied us with green paper which was stamped with Benjamin Franklin’s picture on more than one occasion. And what was your point; that he was a Democrat; Tom were you aware that he was a Democrat; I know I sure wasn’t; my teleprompter never flashed that for me to read!
Uuuuh I’ve been asked to remain on the stage as the recipient of the fourth award; on behalf of General Electric which owns 80 percent of NBC Universal. All I can say is I can’t believe the fact the CEO scolded NBC reporters for negatively reporting news about Obama ever leaked out. I can tell you in my day we would have had the head of that young wiper snapper leaker on a spit. Just who does he think he is some Woodward and Bernstein wannabe?
Hey, I’m Melissa Bean; you wanna make something of it? Just give me the damned award and shut your pie hole. Of course I was; as you say rude to my so called constituents at a town hall meeting. You nailed it sweetie; how dare those bumpkins ask me questions. As for as my persuaders convincing the rabble to be quiet; well, you gotta agree we have an obligation to maintain order. When people are too stupid to realize what we’re trying to do for them; well; we just have to take matters into our own hands.