Amazing Things That You Can Do With a Skeleton If You Have The Courage

"Hello. My name is 'Skull.'

It is so nice to meet you. Kenneth has told me so much about you. Oh, ha, ha. It was all good. I am here to not just thank you for reading his past hubs, but thank you in advance for reading this one. Have yourself a safe weekend and come back soon."

- - "Skull"

I'm an old-fashioned traditionalist. No more. No less. I like potato salad with real potatoes and real chicken when I eat baked chicken. Do you see where this is going?

I like being a traditionalist. I do not have to wake up each day and worry if how I feel about certain things are just a passing fad. That is a nice feeling since I have always had a big problem with pressure. There was pressure to pass the tests in school, pass the grade that I was in, and pressure to graduate. I can validate my thoughts on pressure with this statement: The pressure on me in school was so intense that my hair started coming out when I was a junior in high school.

People noticed this change in my appearance. Not many people, namely classmates, made that many nasty, hurtful remarks such as: "Hey, bend over. I need to see how to comb my hair," or, "Put on a hat. The glare from your balding head is blinding me."

High school was soon a blur in my rear view mirror and I was out on the job market. Why, I do not know? This one question has been eating at me for a long time. You may laugh, but it won't change the things that have went through my mind. Was my getting a job so quickly after high school because of my parents pressuring me? Eureka! That has to be it. Case closed.

So I worked for a year and a half in a mobile home manufacturing company. From there I went to work at a bearing factory, both factories were in my hometown. It wasn't long until I found myself working in a garment factory which was also in my hometown. Job changes are not as fun as some say.

Which was working in the newspaper business. I loved it. Actually, I loved every aspect of the newspaper business in 1975. From taking photos to researching black and white artwork to run through a hot waxing machine to stick to display ads that I was designing.

It was at this time of working with artwork that I fell in love with old-fashioned skeletons. That's right. Skeletons. They are as much a part of America as apple pie and mom. Note: I would have mentioned a certain car company, but this piece would be flagged by HubPages' editors, Christy or Matt, and I wanted this hub to run so I could share my love of skeletons with you.

Some people think that skeletons are only made for three things: One, to stick on our front doors at Halloween to scare trick-or-treaters two, to hang in the corner of most doctor's offices. And three, skeletons "are" given credit for the invention of a "skeleton key." And these things are is as far as our good friend, the skeleton goes. Poor thing. Giving so much of itself. Getting so much in return.

But I wanted to do something special for skeletons, so I humbly present . . .

A Few Amazing Things You Can Do With a Skeleton

• Do The Latest Dance Craze - - with a common, full-size skeleton.
• Let Your Skeleton - - be a daring paratrooper by you climbing a tree then when you see your friends coming, at just the right moment, toss the skeleton down at them, but he will be supported by a rope you have attached to his hands. The skeleton will love the interaction with your friends.
• Do Not Be - - over-protective with your skeleton. I suggest letting your skeleton go to a summer camp for guys so he will have a well-adjusted life and gain a lot of self-confidence.
• Take Up The Hobby - - of being a super-talented ventriloquist. You can even charge for your act at birthday parties, anniversaries and weddings. Do I really have to tell you which of you, the skeleton or you, acts as the vehicle for your voice?
• Take Your Skeleton - - on the bus with you as you ride to work. Sure, people will gawk and whisper, but it's your skeleton. But you need to sit near a window so you cannot be seen waving the skeleton's right or left hand at people in cars at the stop light.
• Dress Up Your Skeleton - - like you, in a neat tuxedo and both of you "crash" the nearest party. Hey, some hot girl might love how you think and act.
• Practice Your Facial - - make-up skills. This is for a boy or girl. You might become a make-up technician working on high-budget movies.
• Get a Good Friend - - to snap a few funny photos of you with your skeleton. Then download them to your hard drive. Send them to friends on the internet and social media. They will love them. And then they will start worrying about you.
• Go Horseback Riding - - with your skeleton. Do not start making fun of me. I have compassion for skeletons. And I just happen to know that horseback riding is one of the skeleton's favorite hobbies.
• Play a Festive Game - - of chess or checkers with your skeleton pal. The game you play depends on "your" I.Q., not the skeleton's I.Q. Question: What a thing to share with friends--being beaten in a game of chess by a skeleton.
• Be a Member of - - a tough motorcycle gang. Dress your skeleton friend with a leather jacket with his "colors" on the back. Naturally, the skeleton's "colors" will be a skull and crossbones.
• Take Your Skeleton - - to lunch or dinner. Skeletons love being in public. So any fast-food restaurant or drive-up food establishment (no mention of company name) will be okay with your skeleton. Talk about being the "center of attention."
• Visit Your Local - - Army or Marines recruiter to see if your skeleton can get a cash bonus (for college) if he enlists. Have your camera ready for the look on the recruiter's face.
• Use Your Skeleton - - to do great public service work such as: Going to local schools and giving anti-drug lectures and say (about the skeleton on stage with you), "this is what can happen to you if you start using drugs."
• Go To The - - movies with your skeleton. You went to dinner with him or her, so why not the movies. I will let you in on a secret. Skeletons love action films.
• Let Your Skeleton - - become a member of the New York City Rockettes. But "he" cannot be a Rockette due to his gender, but you can let him be a "Sock-Ette," Get it? Socket, bones, nice work play, huh? (See photo at very top of this piece).

These, my friends, are only a few highlights of the most popular ideas on things you might love to do with your skeleton.

• Oh, you can research the easiest diets to use to lose weight and yes, let your skeleton be at your side. The object lesson will make you (and him or her) the "talk of the town."

"No bones about it."

Famous Old Sayings About Skeletons:

• "You can lead a skeleton to water, but you best not let him drink."
• "A skeleton is man's best friend." (and dogs tried to ruin this humble saying by getting their name involved with its usage).
• "Haste makes skeletons."
• "Loose lips sink skeletons."
• "Make skeletons, not war."
• "I'm a skeleton, not a fighter."
• "One if my land, two if by skeleton."
• "Red sky at night, skeleton's delight. Red sky at morning, skeletons take warning."
• "Throw them bones." - - a gambling term referring to dice.
• "Bone yard." - - a term used in the playing of dominoes.
• "Worked my fingers to the bone."
• "Boning-up on an upcoming test."
• "Bone head" - - a term of disrespect said by one person to insult another person.
• "Skin and bones."
• "Skeleton crew." - - meaning a company only having a few qualified people to do a job.

The Skeleton - Connection with The Bible, Music, Famous People, Television, and Film

• Prophet Ezekiel prophesied to dry bones - - Ezekiel, Chapter 37, verses 1 - 14.

• The Bone Collector a film starring Denzel Washington and Angelina Joline.
• Napoleon "Bone" a Parts.
• "Bones," the television drama starring David Borneanaz and Emily Deschanel.
• Skull and Bones - - secret fraernity of famous people. George W. Bush, to name one.
• "The Thigh Bone is Connected to . . ." - - a funny, religious look at how "man" is made.