A Few More Things That Irritate Me About Britain. (Part two).

Where's Guy Fawkes when we need him!

The House of Lords.  Can you spot the Queen of Hearts!?  Or the Mad Hatter!!??
The House of Lords. Can you spot the Queen of Hearts!? Or the Mad Hatter!!??

"Hey, blood, call me Pope, heah!"

 Queens, Kings and the Undeserving Titled Heads.

How are you today mlud?

Yes, other maniacally deep hates of mine are queens, kings, (except Clark Gable) princes, princesses (except good old Di), lords, ladies, (except Ga-Ga), dukes (except John Wayne), duchesses, barons, baronesses, squires and even sirs. I mean, imagine, cousins, walking around and expecting blokes to call you Lord, Your Highness, Your Majesty - and nearly all titles signifying respect that is unearned. That’s the crux of the matter isn’t it? Most of this interbred shower of nincompoops have never done a full day’s work or done a darn thing to earn the toadying they receive. Regard Phillip, the queen’s consort, and Charlie, their son: career polo players! Look at the British House of Lords. About 300 fat, jowly old trough-feeders who have one foot in the grave and the intellect of Guinea pigs...brain damaged Guinea pigs. And the worst of them are the “Grace and Favour” members, some of whom have even bought their peerage from the very temporary members of Parliament, after donating huge sums to election campaigns.

Looking into the pasts of these greedy scions of privilege is an education in itself. If you have the time, patience and good sources, you will find many of them have outright crooks and pirates as ancestors. The British royals own property, both real and moveable estate, purloined from all over the planet when Britain was the big bully on the block. Ask good old Liz where the Koh-I-Noor diamond came from and how it was obtained. (Taken from India...they want it back). And that’s just one bauble (worth about as much as Ireland though).

Then there are the other blood-suckers, the church hierarchy. “Hey, blood, jus’ call me Pope, heah!?” Popes, Arch-Bishops, High Priests and all expecting to be called “Father!” Father my patootsie! Try asking “father” if he can slip you a fiver, lend you the car or run you to school. Not a chance, because all this lot are born with their hands firmly held out and expecting them to be crossed with silver, as it is their birthright; their privilege, or their divine right. They don’t pray for us as much as prey on us!

Like they say you know when a politician’s lying...his mouth is moving; you know when any of these titled pricks aren’t worth the time of day. That’s when they insist on anyone using these dumb titles. I personally never would, even your majesty, but most British are serial forelock-touchers and love to grovel before their “betters.!” But there are a few - and they are usually the ones who are war -heroes, or leaders in medicine and the arts who have earned some respect - who refuse to use the titles conferred upon them and insist on being called “Mr/Mrs” or even by their first names. Do you breathe a sigh of relief, Aussies? (if ever a land was free from this crappola it’s our buds from the Antipodes). A queen means one thing down-under, mate, and it don’t wear no bloody crown!

Americans, too, don’t support this nonsense hardly at all in their own land (except for the religious lot), but they do rather like to see it in England. A bit like coming to the zoo, I suppose, all those smelly creatures are fine in their cages (read tiny islands) but we don’t really want them in Peoria!

Many UK citizens have also really had enough of much of it. The royals have behaved badly of late, (always, actually), and all politicians are looked down upon at the moment as liars and thieves. The British are not generally very religious, so the pomp and pageantry of the high church doesn’t play a huge part in the society. (Except papal visits which are huge con jobs netting much money).

We do have one black spot on the horizon, the marriage of William and Kate Middleton next year - another trainee king and queen. The planning amuses me in a country practically on the edge of extinction. All the little royal bum kissers are in full flight; the expenses to each and every man in the kingdom will soon be levied. Why can’t these super-rich twits pay for it all themselves? Liz could sell just one bauble and pay for the wedding ten times over (and fix the palace roof she is whingeing about). But, no, they can’t sell a stick or a bean, this is...wait for it...the Nation’s Heritage and must be passed on down the royal line...for you and me HAHAHA!

Well, all these bootless cries and I haven’t even reached the wan, er, bankers. Maybe we’ll go to a part three as the hated aristocracy used up our time herein...Whew!

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Comments 20 comments

Mr. Happy profile image

Mr. Happy 5 years ago from Toronto, Canada

This is the first blog ever where I hopped on all the buttons. Bloody brilliant! Thank you.

(Check-out my "Hunting politicians: Season Opened" blog if you have time lol.) Cheers!


diogenes profile image

diogenes 5 years ago from UK and Mexico Author

Cheers Mr Happy...will do...Bob


Dolores Monet profile image

Dolores Monet 5 years ago from East Coast, United States

They aren't paying for it themselves? That seems stupid. It's the way of the world, Diogenes. The super wealthy use taxpayers hard earned money for luxury. It's everywhere. At least the wedding will be entertaining for the serfs and commoners! Maybe the royal couple can distribute alms for the poor - throw some coinage off the royal whatever it is they will ride in!


Mr. Happy profile image

Mr. Happy 5 years ago from Toronto, Canada

The Royal Scum want your money - just throw coins to (at) them when they pass by ... lol


Austinstar profile image

Austinstar 5 years ago from Somewhere in the universe

I wonder how you REALLY feel about it? Do tell. Rated up ol' chap. Cheerio, ta ta.


diogenes profile image

diogenes 5 years ago from UK and Mexico Author

Dolores Monet: I think he bought the ring! Or it was borrowed from the Crown Jewels. This crap has being going on for a 1000 years...Bob

Yes, Mr Happy...it might get to them faster in a 12 bore Bob

I am actually royalty myself, Austinstar...this is all disimulation...Bob


Eiddwen profile image

Eiddwen 5 years ago from Wales

A great read.

Thanks for sharing

Take care

Eiddwen


diogenes profile image

diogenes 5 years ago from UK and Mexico Author

Thanks Eiddwen...you too...Bob


Jaymeyaroch profile image

Jaymeyaroch 5 years ago from Somewhere between today and yesterday.

Not often am I grateful to be an American when it comes to how our government is titled, but this made me glad I don't have to remember who is what title!


diogenes profile image

diogenes 5 years ago from UK and Mexico Author

Yes, Jaymeyroch: So far, the Marquis of Bath, and Lord Adonis, have made an appearance in the press today. It's like the Mad Hatter's Tea Party here. Thanks for dropping in...Bob


Hello, hello, profile image

Hello, hello, 5 years ago from London, UK

You definitely got it off your chest, Bob, and I agree with you. Especially that Pope nonsense. Did you know the Vatican banks launders money for the Mafia and Gomorra? How far away can you get from Jesus and his preaching? I think the Princes are going to be a complete different kettle of fish once that old cochroach died. Thank you for a great read and laugh.


diogenes profile image

diogenes 5 years ago from UK and Mexico Author

I didn't know that, but I do recall a scandal re the Vatican bank some years ago and someone was hanged under a London bridge. Bunch of stinking greedy pedos...Bob


Hello, hello, profile image

Hello, hello, 5 years ago from London, UK

He was the so-called "God's banker" which was the Vatican bank. He ran for his life to London and committed "suicide" with two bricks in his pocket. They chosen the Blackfriers Bridge because of its name. Of course, it was never found out who did it. A pope died of stomach problems and they wouldn't give permission for a post examination. He was only 43 days in office and wanted to open all the books. It was only a few popes back. I have forgotten his name. They telling people this is a sin and that is a sin and something else is a sin. That mob is the most hypocritical. There is a shop in Rome which is the most expensive cloth in the world and it is only reserved, guess whom, for the Vatican. The pomp alone makes me sick. Now I believe in God or whatever there is up there and if you look at Jesus just with white linen clothes and look at that mob. Behind the Vatican is the most poverty stricken area in all Rome and that mob can't a penny to help.

I better stop otherwise I will still be writing tomorrow.


Rebecca E. profile image

Rebecca E. 5 years ago from Canada

well, you've gone and done it, I laughed myself silly. Although I am of a mindset that this Queen deserves a bit of repect ( she's 84-- and had to put up with a lot when she could have left... 60 years and counting on the job, I do respect.. but that is the only thing!) it's teh others which frankly I've no time for, well done!


diogenes profile image

diogenes 5 years ago from UK and Mexico Author

The Queen is a bloody old boiler without the intellect ofa wombat, in my opinion, (the wombat is even better looking). Why should she be respected? I mean, I don't hate her, but she has had anything she wants with the click of a finger all her life: her horses, her dogs, a very clever robot - the Duke, and all the rest. I save my respect for the ordinary men and women of the world who really have it tough from the cradle to the grave and whom the establishment couldn't care a fig about...a digested fig! Thanks for comment...Bob


diogenes profile image

diogenes 5 years ago from UK and Mexico Author

Hi Hanna. Just caught your rant...totally agree...Bob


Amanda Severn profile image

Amanda Severn 5 years ago from UK

Bob, this is a rant a half! Not sure I agree with all of it, but it certainly made me chuckle!


diogenes profile image

diogenes 5 years ago from UK and Mexico Author

Hi Amanda: Keep watching for part three: we'll make a believer out of you yet! Bob


BobbiRant profile image

BobbiRant 5 years ago from New York

Great rant, and believe me, I know a good rant when I see one. Well President Obama here is having a Super Bowl party, with, I'm sure, our dime. Sounds like Britain has much of the same mentality toward excesses. Love this one!


Rebecca E. profile image

Rebecca E. 5 years ago from Canada

ha ha-- I do agree with that =) but I suspect i have this gentic thing where I respect the older ones-- she's had to deal with some nincompoops in her time (in Canada my view is mr Jean Cretain--- and to deal with him painted on smile notwithstading--- well...) (never ever will I suggest the duke! never!) but you've said some pretty fair things =) still enjoying this! =)

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