Consensual Incest

Charles Darwin
Charles Darwin
Edgar Allan Poe
Edgar Allan Poe

Gives meaning to the term – “Kissing Cousins”

There are adults who feel consensual incest should be the right of adults. Unlike the child abuse of Incest in the Family, the adults don’t think there is a problem with having sex with close family relations. Can sex between close relatives ever be acceptable? As a matter of history, incest was and is an acceptable practice. There’s a myth that incest is a practice of ignorant, poor, socially disadvantaged people. Not true, right here in America well known, famous individuals married their first cousins.

Gives meaning to the term – “Kissing Cousins” Individuals Who Married Their First Cousins

  1. Josiah Bartlett, second signer of the United StatesDeclaration of Independence, and his first cousin, Mary Bartlett
  2. John C. Calhoun, seventh Vice President of the United States, and his first cousin once removed, Floride Calhoun
  3. Charles Darwin and his first cousin, Emma Wedgwood. Their grandparents, Sarah Wedgewood and Josiah Wedgwood, were also cousins
  4. William Ellery, signer of the Declaration of Independence, and his first cousin once removed, Abigail Cary
  5. William Crowninshield Endicott, former US Secretary of War, and his first cousin, Ellen Peabody
  6. Carlo Gambino, a mob boss,and his first cousin, Catherine Castellano
  7. Charlotte Perkins Gilman, American author, and her first cousin, George Houghton Gilman
  8. Jesse James and his first cousin, Zerelda"Zee" Mimms
  9. Francis Marion, American revolutionary leader also called the "Swamp Fox," and his first cousin, Mary Esther Videau
  10. Abraham Maslow,father of humanistic psychology, and his first cousin, Bertha Goodman
  11. Jerry Lee Lewis, rock and roll musician, and his first cousin’s daughter, Myra Gale Brown (age12-13)
  12. Edgar Allan Poe and his cousin, Virginia Clemm
  13. Martin Van Buren, former president of the US, and his first cousin’s daughter, Hannah Hoes
  14. H. G. Wells,author, and his first cousin, Isabel Mary Wells (first wife)
  15. William Whipple, signer of the Declaration of Independence, and his first cousin, Catherine Moffatt


Queen Victoria
Queen Victoria
Charles II
Charles II

European History

Take a look at European history. In Ancient Greece, Spartan King LeonidasI was married to his niece Gorgo,daughter of his half brother CleomenesI. Roman Emperor Caligula is rumored to have had sexual relationships with all three of his sisters Julia Livilla, Drusilla, and Agrippina the Younger. Emperor Claudius killed his first wife and married his niece Agrippinathe Younger after she was finished with her brother. Claudius changed the law to allow for the illegal union.

Continuing with more modern European history, many European monarchs were related due to political marriages, often resulting in cousins being married. Marrying a cousin was also a way of keeping land, money, power and property in the family (endogamy). This was especially true in the Habsburg, Hohenzollern and Bourbon royal houses.

The House of Habsburg is an example of genetically induced disease as a direct result of inbreeding. The last Hapsburg King of Spain was Charles II of Spain. His ancestry was so intermarried, that he had a higher inbreeding ratio than if he had been born to a brother-sister couple. Let’s try to explain. Normally, there are seven marriages in the preceding three generations of people’s family tree. Charles II had three uncle-niece marriages and 2 sets of grand-parents (cousins) in these seven marriages. His father and two of his great-grandfathers married their nieces. His father’s parents were first cousins once removed. His father’s parents were part of the seven marriages BECAUSE they were also parents to his mother’s parents. His maternal grandparents and the final marriage of great-grandparents were between first cousins. The family tree of Charles II only had 32 different people in the 62 positions.Going back two more generations he only had 82 different people in 254 positions. Charles II gene pool was so corrupt; he was sterile with severe disabilities.

There are no reported marriages in British royalty closer than first cousin. The British royal cousin marriages are considered an example of endogamy,or the practice of marrying within an explicit class and societal group often for monetary gain or power in affairs of state. So that justified the practice. Apparently if you are royalty you decide the norm. The practice of first cousin marriages was not out of the custom. It is predictable that approximately 80 percent of all marriages historically have been between first cousins! We see the practice carried over to founding fathers and American leadership if we back at “Kissing Cousins”. Queen Victoria's marriage to her first cousin was merely based on the appeal between the couple. There was practically no strategic or economic advantage. This marriage produced 9 children, and 40 grandchildren and over 1000 total offspring that comprise an extensive segment of the royalty in Europe over the last century and a half. The deadly genetic disease, hemophilia started with Victoria.

Let’s leap forward to Elizabeth II and her husband Prince Philip who are both related to Christian IX of Denmark. Queen Elizabeth II and Prince Philip are also 3rd cousins from their descent from Queen Victoria. Prince Charles and Diana's most recent common ancestor was William Cavendish, 3rd Duke of Devonshire and his wife, and hundreds of ancestors in common. Prince Charles and Camilla's most recent common ancestor is JamesI.

Consenting Adults

There are actually at least three ‘first world’ highly Catholic influenced countries – Spain, France and Portugal – that do not prosecute consenting adults for incest. These are not ‘third world’ countries. Romaniais considering following the example of Spain, France and Portugal. It’s understandable that people migrating to the United States would continue the practice of ‘consensual incest.’

In Forbidden Love by Johann Hari, the consensual adults have a much closer relationship. Alas the account on the Guardian blog recounts the unfortunate discovery of a bridegroom-to-be and his ‘blushing bride.’ Apparently he walked in on his 22 year old woman having sex with her biological father. The father-daughter couple did not understand the problem.

In a Boston Globe 2005 article, Allen and Pat were lovers, but a Wisconsin statute enacted in 1849 made their sexual relationship a felony. They were convicted of incest; they were biological brother and sister. They didn't meet until Patricia was 18 because she was raised from infancy in foster care. They became a couple and had four children.

Daddy: An Erotic Memoir, author Raul Schmidt (pen name) records his consensual sexual relationships with both of his adult daughters.

The Kiss, by Kathryn Harrison gives her story of the consensual sexual relationship she had with her father as a young adult.

Incest between Adults on the Small Screen

In the medical drama House featured two young patients, a husband and wife, who share the same symptoms Fools for Love. It is revealed that they are half-siblings and they suffer from hereditary disease inherited from their father. Another episode, Skin Deep, a teenage supermodel admits to an incestuous relationship with her father to get what she wants.

The cartoon, The Simpsons, Springfield's rival town Shelbyville was established exclusively to allow men to marry their cousins. According to Shelbyville Manhattan, the organizer of the city, he found cousins attractive.  There was a relationship between Cletus Spuckler and his wife Brandine, who may be siblings, mother and son, or even father and daughter.

In the series drama Lost features two step-siblings, Boone and Shannon engaged in an incestuous encounter. Most viewers are lost trying to understand the plot and purpose of the show!

 British soap Family Affairs portrayed a plot involving Gavin and Polly Arnold, a brother and sister in a consensual incestuous relationship.

 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation crime investigation show has several episodes depicting incestuous relationships.

Conclusion

Consensual Incest is an accepted practice in today’s American society, so much so that the storyline is included in cartoons and comedies (?) on TV. Many shows on the major networks and even PBS have shown adults in incestuous relationships.  Such relationships can be found in movies, literature and heard in songs. One song that comes to mind is Afternoon Delight.  It is a 1976 song by the Starland Vocal Band, written by Bill Danoff, featuring close harmony and sexually suggestive lyrics. The song was used in several episodes of shows depicting consensual incest.

What video games are your teens playing? Just to name one: Grand Theft Auto: Vice City Stories is a game where Victor Vance's important ally, Phil Cassidy, acknowledges that he was trampled by his father under the idea he was sexual attracted to his sister and cousin, which Phil denies.

Work Cited

Consensual Incest

Should consenting adults be allowed to marry/sexual relations regardless of kinship?

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Comments 96 comments

creativeone59 profile image

creativeone59 7 years ago from Gold Canyon, Arizona

Thanks for very disturbing but informative hub, thank you for sharing. creativeone57


Waren E profile image

Waren E 7 years ago from HAS LEFT THE BUILDING............

It's been practiced be the ancient Egyptians and also the Romans as well or so I've read..LOL!

so long as such present day persons are not messing with the kids,I guess it's none of my buisness ..LOL LOL!

Thanks for sharing Claire!


Jess Killmenow profile image

Jess Killmenow 7 years ago from Nowheresville, Eastern United States

In the days of ancient Egypt and Assyria, there was no such concept as incest. So I read in an academic study of the origins of Abraham. Sometime between then and the Mosaic laws, incest started to be really frowned upon.


dashingclaire profile image

dashingclaire 7 years ago from United States Author

Thank you all for the comments and added information.


James A Watkins profile image

James A Watkins 7 years ago from Chicago

There have been mountains of marriages between cousins in human history, that's for sure. Between a parent and a child seems sick to me. Brother and sister? Doesn't strike me as something that ought to go on but I'm sure it does, though not commonly.

This is a fine article about an unusual topic. I like it. Well written, too. Thanks!


dashingclaire profile image

dashingclaire 7 years ago from United States Author

James thank you for your comment and insight.


stricktlydating profile image

stricktlydating 7 years ago from Australia

There is one line in your Hub which particularly worries me. Where you write "Incest is an accepted practice in today’s American society". I'm in Australia, where it's certainly not seen as socially acceptable, and find it doubtful that it would be socially acceptable in the USA, isn't incest illegal there?


dashingclaire profile image

dashingclaire 7 years ago from United States Author

Dear stricktlydating,

Social and legal issues surrounding Consensual Incest are very different. There are no federal laws making incest among adults illegal. That means that 50 states can make their own laws.

Lawrence v. Texas, the Supreme Court's decision in 2003 that the Constitution protects the freedom of Americans to engage in ''the most private human conduct, sexual behavior," when it is part of a willing relationship between adults.

The very fact that this case went all the way to the Supreme Court means that some people find the issue socially acceptable.

Thank you for your comments.


stricktlydating profile image

stricktlydating 7 years ago from Australia

Thanks dashingclare, I also found Wikipedia useful about this subject. It states in part that consensual adult incest is "a crime in most countries" although it is rarely reported, there are people who have been repeatedly prosecuted for this and served prison time: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Incest


dashingclaire profile image

dashingclaire 7 years ago from United States Author

Stricktlydating, thanks so much for your interest in this hub. Other readers will appreciate the additional link.


Ras Allah profile image

Ras Allah 7 years ago

Great eye catcher!


Tucci78 profile image

Tucci78 7 years ago from New Jersey

There is really no question of "allowed" in sexual relationships among consenting but consanguineous adults. Consider the only legitimate purpose of civil government, which is the reliable (and hopefully dispassionate and objective) management of lethal force in deterrent retaliation against criminals - foreign and domestic - who seek to violate the rights of people within that government's jurisdiction. How does "incest" (however it might be defined) constitute any sort of violent aggression against any person's life, liberty, or property? Has the officer of government ANY true authority to intervene in such matters? Let's forget about "allowed" and have the common decency to leave people alone.


Kim 7 years ago

If it revolved around ONLY the conssenting adults, I say to each their own. But medical science has proven many times over that to bear children within these relationships significantly increases the risk of mental and physical deformaties.

In the name of "consenting adults," is not a reason to subject an innocent child's well-being to the consequences of their parents' lust.


jill of alltrades profile image

jill of alltrades 6 years ago from Philippines

A rather disturbing topic but it's very well written. Is it really that "accepted" in the US already?


oldenuf2nobetter 6 years ago

Thomas Jeffersons family married their cousins more often than not from what I've read.I don't know,maybe I'm biased but I have a problem with it.You're entitled to your opinion though,and it was a good hub.


dashingclaire profile image

dashingclaire 6 years ago from United States Author

Jill of Alltrades and oldenuf2nobetter, thank you for your comments. oldenuf2nobetter not quite sure what you meant by your comment, "you're entitled to your opinion." Yes I am entitled to my opinion, but this hub was meant to be objective, with everyone reading coming to their own opinion.


v_kahleranderson profile image

v_kahleranderson 6 years ago from San Jose, California

Wow! I have to agree with creativeone59, "disturbing!" However informative. With cousings, once and more removed, perhaps I can see that, but closer than that...well, that's a whole other world!

Great topic, so I rated this UP!


Diane 6 years ago

for some people this topic may be disturbing but for me who experienced consensual sibling incest (puberty to adult circa 1980s) i take it as an "important" experience. it brought us closer as siblings and diminished sibling rivalry. although i strongly would not encourage anyone but my experience have taught me many things. at the end of the day it all depend on the people involved. thanks nicely done!!


dashingclaire profile image

dashingclaire 6 years ago from United States Author

v_kahleranderson, thanks so much for the positive review.

Diane, thanks for taking the time and feeling comfortable enough to share your experiences.


erojr1 6 years ago

I know it is going on worldwide; guess the only drawback might be that genetic reproduction could have some issues ? I have heard of a thing called; "inbreeding", that can create health issues. If true; that kind of puts a burden on the offspring. Still, I believe that mutual & equal understood consent is all that should be involved.


dashingclaire profile image

dashingclaire 6 years ago from United States Author

Thanks erojr1 for your comments. "Inbreeding" can be a serious side effect as I noted with Charles 11. The family breeded themselves out of exist because of sterility. There's a family chart under his pictures that shows what I mean.


mustqualify 6 years ago

Creating children with major illnesses, disabilities and defects by choice if uncest is violent, cruel and unusual punishment. Since there are so many doctors and medical researchers who are trying to cure diseases, disabilities and defects, incest by choice is vicious, haneous, selfish, degrating. Science has proven that to strengthen biological survival, it is best to make children out of own race, creed...As a childhood incest survivor, I am happy I was not in childbearing years. The stigma, trauma and embarrassment was enough the way it happenned, that bearing a child out of incest would have been much more disturbing and traumatic.Please Stop diseases/defects created by incest


mustqualify 6 years ago

To clarify an unclear sentence in my first entry: Science has proven that to strengthen biological survival and decrease chances of genetic diseases, defects it is best to procreate 'outside' of your own family and instead have children with other races, creed....Please Don't Be Stupid!Please Stop Incest, consensual or unconsensual. With 6+ Billion people to choose from do you have to choose your direct blood relatives? Be smart and don't be lazy, or continue low self-esteem, choose outside of your family for sex!!!! Incest is not best, it's mortifiying spiritually and biologically. If you love your family, you won't create more hymophiliacs, or other defects or diseases. I guess if you like incest, your DNA has probably been compromised from too much incest in your ancestry!!!!!


Red Dragon 6 years ago

I have always had feelings for my mom, She and I have always bee more like best friends than mother and son. She had me when she was 15 and she's one of those women who look about ten years younger than she is because she's in really good shape. After my dad dropped dead at work of a massive coronary I confessed to my mom that I was really glad that "the moron" was out of the way an that I was excited about the opportunity that his croaking gave us. We're both adults and with 'you-know-who dead and buried now we can enjoy each other.


Chaotic Chica profile image

Chaotic Chica 6 years ago

Wow! You did a fantastic job doing your homework for this one and it has paid off. You have certainly given me some food for thought in regards to a topic I have typically considered completely inexcusable. I still have no intentions on entering into this practice but it interesting to see the other side of the picture.


Bolthorn profile image

Bolthorn 6 years ago

For those that try to raise a religious objection to incest, they might want to skim through their bibles. Its full of it, ostensibly condoned by God. The problem with it is genetics. Its simply a stupid idea that causes problems and others here have covered that quite well. I disagree with the conclusion you have arrived at, however. Incest is not an accepted practice. It is a social taboo. Whether or not that is down to culture or if there is a moral basis is arguable, but mainstream society does not accept it.


dashingclaire profile image

dashingclaire 6 years ago from United States Author

Thank you all for your comments.

Bolthron whether you believe mainstream society accepts or not, 69% of the 110 people who voted in the poll above don't agree w/you. You'd have to prove they were not mainstream. I just present documented facts.

Thank you all again for your insightful comments. Keep the comments coming of all points of view.


Bolthorn profile image

Bolthorn 6 years ago

The poll on this hub is anything but scientific for a number of reasons. I'll name just one: the topic itself, for the most part, will draw a unique crowd to reading it since most people would avoid the topic because it is considered unsavory by most. I went ahead and did a poll of my own, asking at least 15 people I came in contact with today what their opinion is. I didn't get a single answer that it is socially accepted. That is a 100% not-accepted rate. Find me a scientifically conducted poll that states otherwise and I'll rethink my perspective. I applaud the exploration of the topic and think you did a great job, but no, it really really isn't socially accepted.


dashingclaire profile image

dashingclaire 6 years ago from United States Author

Dear Bolthorn,

I don't have to find you anything. Do your own research. The poll was just that - a poll - for anyone feeling comfortable enough to answer it. It's raw data. If I wanted a scientific poll I'd do an entirely new hub or better yet publish findings in a research journal. This poll is not nor was it meant to be applied research. The poll does not have a

Hypothesis

Conceptual definitions

Operational definition

Gathering of data

Analysis of data

Test, revising of hypothesis

Conclusion

I will not be doing any qualitative or quantitative research. You are free to do or think what you want because this is America and no one has come up with a law restricting that - yet. I do enjoy your comments. They’re very enlightening.


180309love 6 years ago

I think as long as it is consented and does not hurt anyone in the process there is nothing wrong.

Love can happen to anybody whether you allow it or not and there is not much a person can do once feelings are already involved. Although it would not be right to 'intentionally' look for love within your family.

I have a close friend who is in a relationship with her half brother and frankly it is no different from any other 'socially accepted' relationship.

The issue on wanting to bring and raise a child into the world knowing that the child may suffer a difficult or different life healthwise may be selfish or however else described but surely the issue and consequences should have been discussed well before conceiving and a remedy thought up incase of the sad possibility of a defect in the child.

I think that these kinds of relationships are not harmful to society so society should not be harmful to these relationships. It should not be for people to judge or interfere.


grungy 6 years ago

I have known several close relationships .Most are like anyother. One was 1/2 siblings, Girls in costody of Father. Brother oldest,2years younger girl BUT She was the aggressive mature one.they 'played' a lot as tweens. in visatations. but at 14 the boy moved into the home Father -1/2 mother were absentees. over night some times the three teens slept together in one bed when they were uot of town. I was the wakeup for school friend . the seldom were dressed when I go there.two mornings /I found them in coutis with the younger girl watching and masturbating. tey didn't stop for me being in the house.

My first Cousin and I explored the possibilities of an adult relationship.

two of my Female cousins married cousins from there maternal side.My step nsices had teen flings with my blood nephews after the parents were married and divorced. My own step father married a lady with grown offspring.. She was drug addicted he civorced her after 5 months ,but the two teen girls stayed with him and slept in his bed. I went for early work detail one morning, arrived at 5:30, went in made coffee. sat in the dark kitchen. at 6:00 the alaem went off . They mae lots of happy sounds and then she came out of the open bedroom naked and drippy wet went across the kitchen to the bathroom, left the door open no lights on, did the basic clean up and returned to the bed of my step father. then as if in a dream she looked back in to me at the table and told Him I was there and had seen her leaving the room. she put on a towel and went into HER own room to get dressed.I was noy shocked or angry. he gave 35 years to my ailing mother and I he deserved his right to a life as good as it could get.He then married my EX Aunt[not by blood] the sister to the divorced naked Girls mother[=Aunt}.I know three girs under 20 today who were taught by Brothers or taught them in fine points of sexual encounter.

In a Foster Care Group home that is rural.I watched as two sisters made out with their biological brother to orgasm with out penis penetration, but all other avenues of pleasure were exhausted.they are happy to be in the same home till they are 'all' 18.


chig_3114 6 years ago

My Mom is possibly the best first sexual experience I could have found. It was not only sexually erotic but incredibly pleasurable I've never felt anything to compare with it...


dashingclaire profile image

dashingclaire 6 years ago from United States Author

I want to thank everyone who felt comfortable enough to leave comments, whether pro or con. It is only from intelligent exchange of ideas that we will learn. It doesn't mean we agree, accept or condemn - just learn!


Parul 6 years ago

I think it works best when both partners, irrespective of relations, are above thirty.


Parul 6 years ago

It is like getting in to a new horizon of pleasure for a

son 36 and mother 54


dashingclaire profile image

dashingclaire 6 years ago from United States Author

Parul interesting concept.


Hans 6 years ago

It doesn't matter if consensual adult incest is "acceptable" or not because it is a private matter. If two adults have sex together, and never tell anyone, then how are they to be punished for it?

Laws that have no hope of being enforced are nothing but an expression of disapproval by the state.


dashingclaire profile image

dashingclaire 6 years ago from United States Author

Hans thanks for your viewpoint.


Kaitou 6 years ago

Tucci78: the reasoning behind the social and legal taboo of incest is derived from the genetics, over time society began to notice the effects on ofspring of closely related members, unlike the rest of yall ive no good links to the hard data and research on the matter though i believe the wiki on incest does go a bit into detail about it.

if you think there is no violence committed, that is a point of arguing, though we do not stop people with known genetic disorders from getting married and thus having a higher chance of a defective offspring, close relations within a family have been genetically proven to result in otherwise recessive genes manifesting and most commonly in a negative manner. the crime committed you could say is against the child who didn't have a choice to be born, though if one were to argue that then marriage between those with known genetically transferable disorders should probably also be limited.

that said i for one have been for most of my life considered fairly intelligent however at a young age i became sexually aware, and accidentally found out the difference between boys and girls when i attempted to teach my own sisters how to ejaculate... though i never had full on intercourse with my sisters, i grew up looking at my sisters as women, given the chance i dont think i would deny a chance to have relations with them. thats part of the reason i dont talk to them much heh...

(sorry for the double post could yo disaprove the first one i forgot the important part of my post in response.)


6 years ago

With relationships and marriage I think that incest is not a good idea. Interbreeding leads to birth defects and all kinds of problem. However, sex is a huge part of soceity and life in general. I think that there is no problem in having a strictly sexual relationship a family member is fine as long as its practiced safely, no matter what they are to you. Maybe that's just me. I haven't had any type of relationship with a family member, I haven't really thought about doing it either. I just feel like if its going to happen with other people around the world that's how it should be.

X


Silent Witness 6 years ago

I know of a man and daughter that are hush-hush about their relationship. She disappreared out of his life when the mother was upset because he didn't want to be with her. Roughly 10 years later when she turned 18 the reunited and things took off sexually. They have been in a sexual relationship for 8 years now and still going on without any issues. The daughter doesn't want any children and seems very happy. The daughter and father are both educated persons.

I am one that knows of their relationship. They hide it to the rest of the family and are doing very well living in a city with no other relatives. Their neighbors see them as a couple but don't know they are related because the father is very handsome and looks young. The daughter 28 and the father is 44. I've never seen a more happy couple in my life.


Becca D 6 years ago

As a participant in consensual incest I strongly recommend not doing it! After a night of drinking I engaged with sex with my younger brother (age 30). In the morning the guilt was horrible We were so close before but after that night things have never been the same. .


dashingclaire profile image

dashingclaire 6 years ago from United States Author

This hub been published for a while, but continues to get comments. Thanks to everyone for sharing your thoughts, feelings, concerns - most important - personal experiences.


sex4seniors 6 years ago

Consider a brother and sister who found themselves a wife and husband respectively, and each raised a family. Years later, the brother's wife died, leaving him alone. He did not wish to get married again. The sister's husband became abusive and they divorced. She did not wish to find another husband because of her bad experiences. But she had been very close to her brother. She was post menapause, so childbearing was out of the question.

If they choose to fill each others emotional and physiological needs without pressure or coercion, why should they fear condemnation or legal penalty?


dashingclaire profile image

dashingclaire 6 years ago from United States Author

sex4seniors thanks you for coming by and leaving your comment. From your screen name it seems your are a mature individual w/more experience than a teen. I am pleased you felt comfortable enough to leave your opinion.


Cotton Candy 6 years ago

I just recently became reunited with my family.

When I was 4 years old, my real father sexually molested me. I had no idea what was going on, but my father threatened my life for a long time if I told anyone. He held me over a bridge and told me he would catch me on fire and throw me in if I told my mom what happened.

When I got old enough to realize he more than likely wasn't going to throw me into the water, I told my mother.

My mother of course got me away as quickly as she could, tearing me away from my three sisters and my two brothers.

Come to find out now, out of the the 5 children, 4 of them were older than me, and one of them 9 months younger than me., Meaning my father didn't want me born, he cheated on his wife with my mother and here I came along.

Well, I am 23 years old now, and I haven't heard from the brothers or sisters or anything ever since my mom took me away from them. I couldn't remember their names/faces, I was always wondering if I would run into them or anything, but I knew I wouldn't recognize them if I did. I have almost NO childhood memories of my brothers and sisters, I've blocked the idea of them out of my headd as much as possible.

So I very recently got back into contact with this family of mine, via facebook. (My father got married AGAIN, and had two more children. One of those children found me on facebook when she found out that I existed).

I am a very educated, non -promiscious person. I mean, I enjoy sex as much as the next person, but I don't just have sex with anyone, I'm usually in commited relationships before having sex with a person; & this is something I never phatomed could happen, I have never thought things like this could happen., but upon the first time meeting my sisters&brothers in person, I had the most intense connection with my brother. More intense than I have ever had in any relationship, it felt like I had known him my whole life, and I felt insanely safe and comfortable next to him. Around everyone else, I felt the normal nerves you would feel upon meeting a family you haven't seen for so many years, but I was right at ease with my brother.

Well, he felt it too, definitely, as we have now met maybe 5 different times, all in group situations with our other relatives, but we always have the connection, and we don't even have to say what we are thinking. It's a very intense thing.

The first few times I met him, I couldn't stop myself from thinking; "I know if I met him in any other situation and had no idea we were brothers, something would have happened with us, we would have got in a relationship, or had sex, or soemthing".

The thoughts are VERY uncontrollable, and take over my mind. When we are all hanging out, when we leave, I feel sad because I know I won't be around him for awhile.

We recognize that we miss each other when we are apart. Nothing has happened, but I must say it is a possibility. The thoughts are there.

It's very akward, and weird. It's not like I want the thoughts there, but I can't make them go away, and I know he is the same.

So this is why I was researching the topic, and came across this forum.

My thoughts on the topic are as follows:

Could some of it be some sort of psychological thing for some people? I mean, did my father mess with my brother as a child also and it's a subliminal thing?

Or maybe genetics somehow. Like some families got away from their bloodline a very long time ago, and others did not.

Whatever it is, I WILL tell you, the thoughts are very hard to control, like it hurts to have to hold the thoughts in.

It's not something to brush off as disgusting, or to belittle, because all situations need to be looked at; like from everyones point of view.

I mean, I didn't mean to meet my brother and have feeligns for him, but what would have happened if we had met, let's say, at a bar, and had no idea who the other one was?

So this is the point of view coming from someone who experienced both consensual and non consensual incest relations.

And my sisters and brothers from that side are very close, and they would never dream of anything like this happening, so it's a very akward place for my brother also.

&, he has a girlfriend of seven years who is very close with the family. He doesn't want to mess that up, what he has had his whole life.. just his family, and his girlfriend. And I don't want to mess that up either.

What do I do, if I can't make the feeligns go away, and wwhat does he do, if he can't make the feelings go away? They are so strong, it's ridiculous. A very uncontrollable thing.

It's a very tough struggle, and it is very REAL. We know that either, we are going to be hurting forever on the inside because of it;

or, we are going to rip up the family, and hurt everyone.

We are both very quiet people, who don't need to speak to know all of this. We have NO desire to hurt anyone in the family, but we know in doing so we are hurting ourselves.

As of now, I believe that nothing will happen, because of how strong the desire is NOT to hurt the family, and his girlfriend who is a part of this amazing family, his life.

But I'm not sure if it's a pain that we could cope with forever.


dashingclaire profile image

dashingclaire 6 years ago from United States Author

Cotton Candy It seems you know what the right decision is w/you and your brother. Speak w/a professional regarding your father's actions and how it effected you. Sounds like you are in a lot of pain.


Cotton Candy 6 years ago

Thank you for responding.


dashingclaire profile image

dashingclaire 6 years ago from United States Author

Good luck and blessings to you Cotton Candy. May you find peace.


Bill 6 years ago

My older sister and I had consensual sex for 4 years in the late 1970's and have partaked a few times since with the last being 2007. I am 54 she is 57 now.


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dashingclaire 6 years ago from United States Author

Bill thank you for sharing your experience


dreamer93 6 years ago

i have never had any incenstrous relationships with anyone in my family but i need to speak my mind about something.

i love my brother more than anything, growing up we were the typical brother and sister. he teased me, i cried and so on. but later on when i was about 14 or so we started hanging out more than just me watching him play computer games. we started watching series together, and are today still.

I noticed something a few months back that he started being comfortable touching me, not in a sexual way. what I mean is just ordinary touching like more hugging and being able to sit closer, seeking my comfort when watching a scary movie even if he is 2 years older than me. maybe i was being paranoid and I tried very carefully not to make it into something it wasn't. I guess I succeeded, cause nothing has happened.

but a while it did bother me, and it still does sometimes. for example: the fact that I, during two weeks of last summer, cried every night because i missed him so much... now he is at home once a week and i never cry. I hope that means i've grown up and the fact that I once worried was mostly because my brother has never had a girlfriend and has been uncomfortable hugging me (maybe he was just being a typical brother). I on the other hand have had one and a half boyfriends, not very succesfull relationships if I may add, but it makes me relax, a bit.


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dashingclaire 6 years ago from United States Author

dreamer93 I hope there is a trusted adult with whom you can explore your feelings. You seem to be uncomfortable. Best wishes


Cotton Candy14 6 years ago

Hello, Cotton Candy here; I would just like to update my situation for anyone who may be researching this information for theirselves and are curious as to how the relationship with my brother has progressed:

My brother & I now have a very beautiful relationship like none other that I have experienced. It is very discreet, but I wouldn't trade it for the world.

This has been an extremely painful, emotional thing for me to go through, and has consumed a lot of my life. I wouldn't take a second of it back.


Scott 6 years ago

Parents taking advantage of their own children sexually, is RAPE!!! Even more disturbing than this, is that the majority of society doesn't see the crime in it, which would lend itself to explain why our "SOCIETY", is INSANE. Maybe THAT, which created everything, really will end human life on December 21, 2012 because after all of the human hype about being superior, humans are really in denial of their true, average, lowlife worthlessness. The best parents, never become such. If you truly love your children, you would never have them to begin with. Only users bring offspring into existence, something that Cockroaches do so well. People go to jail for trivial nonsense, yet, "PARENTS", get to rape their children while "RAISING" them, and are innocent in most of society's eyes, which bleeds itself into the way society conducts its affairs, which explains, in great part, why "WE'VE" achieved nothing. If you think that there is nothing wrong with licking, and dicking your child, throughout their lives, from deliveryroom, to cap, and gown, then you are the epitome of EVIL, and need to leave this planet. Stick that in your pipe, and smoke it.


dashingclaire profile image

dashingclaire 6 years ago from United States Author

Cotton Candy posted your update.

Scott you sound like you have unresolved personal issues. Get the help you seek now, don't wait.


angsgurl 6 years ago

Wow, great find. I believe every situation needs to be looked at for what it is. I for one, would never ever be able to have sex with my father or brother. However, I have been in a sexual relationship with a family member. My half sisters son, my half nephew. I know what it sounds like but we didn't plan on this happening. My father had children from a previous marriage. I never even knew my half siblings and they are much much older than I am. My nephew and I are the same age and the first time we met, we were 17 years old. The connection was strong then, but we were kids. Fast forward 10 years and our paths crossed again. This time, it was almost impossible to fight the urge and the love we had for eachother. If we had met in any other way, there wouldn't be any doubt that we were meant to be together. He came to visit my father and instantly we were inseperable. This was two years ago and we have been together every since. The thought of not having him in my future has my friend, lover and partner is simply UNBEARABLE. For the first year, we hid our relationship from the family, out of fear. It was hard because we are deeply in love with eachother. Now, the family knows and are supportive. It wasn't like we grew up together and crossed over boundries that had been set. We never knew of eachother, never met and when we did...we fell in love instantly. I know a lot of people may judge us but when you have something so incredible, I could really care less. I have met the man who takes care of me, loves me and the man I cannot live without. The world may look at us like we are doing something wrong but we never once felt like this was a bad thing. Our families were already seperated so this isn't hurting anyone. They barely knew of him before our relationship. My father passed after our relationship started and it was very hard on me but he would have been the only one directly affected by our relationship as he was his grandson and I am his daughter. Losing my father was hard, but he was there for me all the while. My mom is supportive and wants me to be happy. I just wish we could live our lives together without the judgement and heartache given by the outside world. :(


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dashingclaire 6 years ago from United States Author

Thanks for sharing angsgurl your interesting encounter.


Kalle from Sweden 5 years ago

Consensual incest happens a lot more often than we think. I don't have a sister (just two brothers), but I have a good friend who told me that he had sex with his twin sister when they were teens. And an ex-girlfriend hinted about having sex with her brother. As long as it is consensual and happens with people at roughly the same age, then I don't see a problem. But I think we all agree that sexual abuse of children (by adults) must stop, and the abusers should be put in jail.


dashingclaire profile image

dashingclaire 5 years ago from United States Author

Kalle from Sweden I think you are correct in your observations thanks


Bruce 5 years ago

I don't know if it is considered incest or not but my neice and I have been in a relationship for 5 months. She is 35 and I am 51. We both went though messy divorces about the same time. We are both into running and started to hanging out together and going on runs together. She has a 3 year old daughter so we are very careful,usually have sex once a week after a workout. I first I felt guilty about this but as it was her that made the first move I no longer feel this way. I know someday we are going to have to stop. I never want my sister to find out. We have both been looking into the subjuct of incest( it's how we came upon this sight)and want to know more about the taboo in the USA. We live in Massachusetts and have been toying with the idea of moving down south.


dashingclaire profile image

dashingclaire 5 years ago from United States Author

Bruce she's your niece, your siblings child. It's incest.


papalovy 5 years ago

dashingclaire,does something necessarily have to be socially accepted for it to be morally upright?instead,i think that something has to have a sufficient reason for it to be right in order for it to be accepted socially.


FERDINANDO 5 years ago

THX

I have had a sexual relationship with my sister for ten years, after she got widowed.

We began when kids and continue when young, no sex at all.

I love her in a filial manner and our sexual intercourse are remarkably exquisite as never experienced before in our respective marriage.


tugbo200-5 5 years ago

Wow

the comments blew me away.

some very sad

some upset

some relationships which are truly incest

Well written hub


killedbyapanda 5 years ago from Princes Risborough

i just want to say that on the whole i believe incest to be wrong! however irrespective of this statement, i have a confession.

I Have A Sexual Relationship With Several Members Of My Close Family.

1. My Brother, i dont usually go for him but sometimes when he's really feeling down and he needs my support, thats when true joy comes into play! (No pun intended!)

2. My Mother, she is a fairly regular sexual encounter for me, just after another dissapointing night shes someone for me to go home to! someone i know will be holding down the fort and will love me no matter what!She is my rock! (pardon the pun!)

3. My close friend (i know this isn't technically incest but its also important to me) my best friend, a man named john, has been there for me since my youth and we regularly experiment sexually. he is a physically attractive man and i have no shame in saying that we often get naked and perform intercourse! both of us are married and neither of our wives or families are bothered by our activities so if someone wants to look down on me, look away!!! (if you'll pardon the pun!) Sam Birch, im all in for this one! X


dashingclaire profile image

dashingclaire 5 years ago from United States Author

killedbyapanda your statement is an oxymoron or a pun!


Danny hazle 5 years ago

I was raped when i was 14 by the local paedo in vange and due to being high on coke i didn't mind it, it was then i realised i was gay.

My little brother's terry and tony laughed when they found out cos they new i was gay before i did, but i knew they was as well so one night i got them drunk and we had a fondle, that went on for 10 years in secret till terry told his mate and everyone found out.

Now im back in the closet and dont recommend insest, alough my daughter is 16 now and looking alright...

There are many things going on behind closed doors in this world and i bet we aint alone.


Carmen 5 years ago

My brother and I are incestuous lovers. We've been a couple since I was 15 and he was 17. We both entered into the sexual relationship willingly, there as no power play, no coercion. Once i became 26 and he became 28, we decided we wanted children, so we adopted in our native Costa Rica. Neither of us wanted to bring a defective or deformed child into the world. Adoption was our solution. Recently, my brother and I each had sexual relationships with other people for the purpose of procreation. My brother's partner is expecting, as am I. When these children are born, they will become part of our family. My brother and I have resumed our sexual relationship.

We feel no shame, we have no remorse, and no regrets about our incest. We love one another. Our bond is stronger that that of many "normal" married couples. But we did do the responsible thing in adopting and procreating with other people.


eLow1 profile image

eLow1 5 years ago from Lost Angles

Thank you dashingclaire, for your informative hub.

I have been attracted to "Consensual Incest"; indirectly, so sometime now.

What I mean by saying indirectly is that, I had once dated a girl (she was 24 @ the time) that I eventually, stumbled upon her ongoing affair she was having with her father. At first, I was freaked out about it but later, I was extremely turned on by her on-going relationship w/her father. Not to mention, he was always a great guy to me. Not only did he fully support her and her lifestyle but, even gave us a cruise to Hawaii and several weekends to Vegas at one of the luxury resorts...

Recently, I was dating a woman; 38, was I met on craigslist; on the kink board, who was sexually active with her 19yo son. After weeks of heated emails to each-other, detailing her loving & lustful relationship w/her son, we eventually met and soon after starting dating. I eventually met her son; a great guy, and we all would hangout all together. We even had 4 threesomes before our friendship/relationship ended. I think she just had no time for me, lol!


dashingclaire profile image

dashingclaire 5 years ago from United States Author

Danny hazle and Carmen thanks for being so open in your sharing. eLow1 Thanks for comment. Sorry you got pushed assigned so to speak in your relationship. Wishing you a more wholesome relationship.


fantasized 5 years ago

I have fantasized about my own mother. I would love the opportunity to get into it with her. I am 25 she is 56...even if it's wrong, I'd still do her.


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dashingclaire 5 years ago from United States Author

fantasized I have no comment except a girlfriend may help - one that resembles your mother maybe.


NSAroommate 5 years ago

I do believe that consensual incest should be legal AND acceptable. I would be thrilled to hear of some mother/son sexual relationships.


Oldngrey 5 years ago

I grew up at a time when children do a little sexual exploring wasn't sterio typed as sexual abusers. Those involved were simply considered to be "checking things out". What I find extremely distribing is a young child being labeled as a mostered/sexual preditor simply because they happen to be caught in the act of "show me yours and I'll show you mine" with a sibling. I personally find the so called "do gooders" that created the present situation and veiw point as pathetic and a risk to human rights. Yes my thought concerning this matter are guided because of what I experienced during my younger years, no doubt about it..So I vote that ANY CONSENTING ADULT have the right to do as they please behind closed door. Nuff said...


Dr. K 5 years ago

As a doctor of Psychology for 22 years I have specialized in cases of incest, both consensual and non consensual. While the ramifications of nonconsensual sex are quite clear, there remains a wide grey area as to which is consensual and which is not. My most fascinating cases are those of mother and adolescent son, most of which seem to go on for many years in complete secrecy, well into the sons adult life, primarily because men are more seldom viewed as victims when it involves a relationship with a woman; his mother for example.

I categorize these cases in two groups. Healthy and non-healthy. The healthy type being a relationship where both consenting parties seek unconditional love. These involve lovemaking in its romantic sense, apposed to raw pornographic sex. In these cases it is paramount that the adult parties realize this can not continue forever and contraception is a huge responsibility.

The second group is that which I consider degrading sex, and this opens a psychological can of worms that most often bothers me when I deal with it. These are harmful relationships that end in disaster and deep mental scaring that is rarely reversed. Where there are unhealthy mother and son relationships (even normal everyday relationships without sex) there are doors opened into the bizarre.

Jane and Kenny are by far my most interesting patients. Kenny being a son who fantasized about his attractive mother since the age of 15. Jane having no problems meeting men after her divorce to Kenny's father, was attracted to the wrong type of man. Abusive men who beat her in jealous rage to her provocative style of dressing. That which attracted them to her to begin with. At 17 years of Age Kenny beat up one of these men in her defense causing Jane to become obsessed with her son in sexual fantasy. On his 18th birthday they over indulged in alcohol and cocaine and had sex at home in her bedroom for 3 days. Today, they enjoy sober and "sweet" lovemaking, which climaxes into passionate physical sex, and then back to hugs and kisses.

Jane regards her relationship with Kenny as continually respectful and sees him as her son, lover, and best friend. Kenny feels the same.

They laugh most of the time they are together, enjoying each other's company in a way I wish my married patients did with their spouses, more often complaining of disillusioned love. Furthermore Kenny is not jealous of the looks Jane receives from men. He asks

"how can I blame them? She is so sexy." My only fear is that the relationship will continue for life, most likely with James timely death (being 19 years older than Kenny) and Kenny unable to replace it with new love. Finally there is Jane's fetish with semen and wanting Kenny to climax inside her, both orally and vaginally, creating risk for pregnancy.

NK


ProfessorJeff 5 years ago

I’d like to offer three things to this discussion. These may help people who are struggling with certain related issues:

1) First cousin marriages are not condemned in the Bible. They are not considered illegal under Mosaic law. About ½ of the states allow cousin marriages. For example, Nevada does not allow them, but California does. So if you live in Nevada and want to be legally married – get hitched in California. I think most people would not regard cousin marriages as incest. It is not such a taboo topic because so many families have some history of cousin marriages. I think the genetic danger really comes in when you have repeated cousin marriages for several generations.

2)Inbreeding is arranged all the time by Dog Breeders. If you want to strengthen certain traits in a breed you might mate a grandfather dog with a granddaughter dog. My understanding is that the negative affects seem to come in with the 8th generation of dog inbreeding. That is when the ability to produce offspring starts to go down. I am not sure what generation it would be for consecutive human inbreeding. I would like to hear from an honest geneticist as to what the real story is regarding human inbreeding. The example of Charles II of Spain and the examples of most of European Royalty in general is that they have so many generations of close marriages. Of course they are going to have problems. Humans are different from dogs, but I wonder if the talk of risk to a first generation of an incest pregnancy is exaggerated. How many abortions were needlessly conducted out of fears that may have little basis in science? How many generations does it take for the risk of defects from inbreeding to exceed the normal risk of defects in the general population? One of the worst cases of genetic defects I have witnessed had nothing to do with inbreeding, but appears to have been created by too much “Out-breeding”-- She was the product of 4 different races and had an incredible number of physical and emotional ills.

3)Mosaic law condemned close marriages. However, the bible tells us that Moses himself was a product of just such a marriage. His father married his Aunt. This would be considered illegal under bible (Mosaic) law. Abraham married his half sister, also considered illegal. Their son Isaac married a cousin who was descended from another illegal marriage: her grandfather (brother of Abraham) married his niece. All these marriages and others in the bible happened before Moses made them illegal. These marriages are not condemned or punished in the bible record. I get the feeling God was orchestrating a breeding project for about 3 generations. He started with Abraham who was the 10th consecutive first born son of Noah. That meant something to the ancients – it meant he was the best representative of the spiritual and genetic heritage of Noah in his generation. That is like starting with a champion horse or champion dog and breeding from there. He used successive cousin marriages and closer marriages, and the results were good.

Like dashingclaire, I am leaving most of the opinions up to you. But I will say this, if you are involved in close relationships, don’t let the bible people get you down.


josephine Scholes 5 years ago

WOW, such a great novel exploration of extending joy to persons ( man & women both)by innovating presentation like this. It shares partly to one of my sexual fantasies. Never care for hypocrates of society for consenting incest amongst adult consenting partners either two or more. 80% people like incest with other consenting adults if safe chance ia available. Such sweet sex to be tried with horse is some thing of added innovation really. Keep on making such documentaries please.


Sara 5 years ago

Sex is a personal thing and with whom it is done should be personal choice. It does not mean sex with minor should be allowed. Two adults consenting for sex and doing it should not be punished just because its incest.


letlovedecide 5 years ago

As one who actively engages in a first cousin relationship, I see no harm in consensual sex among kin. I do agree however with an earlier post saying that one shouldn't preconceive the notion to have sex with kin for the hell of it. It'd be better to at least be into each other, if not in love with each other. With modern genetic services such as genetic counseling being offered nowadays, having a child with kin can be a safe option.


broluvslittlesis 4 years ago

why all the fuss and debate regarding consensual adult sibling incest? In this society where so many more destructive lifestyles and personal freedoms are condoned, why interfere with the sexual behavior of consenting adult brothers and sisters behind closed doors.I find it amusing , and quite ignorant, when so many attempt to explain the "why" of consensual adult incest. Or attempt to stereotype the individuals or family history of such individuals. I know for a fact that consensual adult sibling incest can be both a very positive relationship and experience; that it can exist between individuals which this society would consider exceedingly "successful" by any other standard. The individuals who find such behavior so vile and repugnant, should ask themselves why do references to incest exist within our lexicon? The most intuitive example(and in my opinion, perhaps most accurate) may well be :"Incest is best". I do not profess that sibling incest is for "every one", nor do I think it should be so highly publicized or debated as homosexuality has been ( "not that it"s a bad thing", as they would say on Sienfield!). I would say that for those with enough intact ego, with enough moral courage, and with the right inter-personal relationship with their sibling, consensual adult incest can be a very, very satisfying experience. Like Pandora"s Box, however, be warned. The individuals about to embark on such an endeavor must choose this type of behavior for themselves. The key here is both "adult" and "consensual". Once this has been well established I would then add: hang on!! Because you could very well be in for the ride of your life!


Saiya 4 years ago

In response to must qualify,

I believe that while you have valid concern for the possible children of incest, you have disregarded the relationship part between two cousins, siblings what have you. I don’t believe it’s always about creating babies but about exploring your body, learning the difference between male and female, and developing respect for the opposite sex with people you are close to and feel you can trust. I’m not saying that all relations among relatives are good, I understand that there are many people out there that have been hurt and abused by family members in ways I can never understand. But I do not believe that is a solid reason to condemn all relations between relatives. I’m mostly concerned about coming from a perspective where absolutely no children are ever conceived and the relationship in and out of the bedroom is stable, spiritual, and healthy for both parties. With that said what are the points and arguments? Can siblings and cousins have healthy, respective, and loving sexual relationships? What is the main taboo behind having sex with some one that you share genetics with? I understand that reproducing with a relative has many social and evolutionary consequences, but as I said before, I wish to remove the offspring from this discussion. If no child results, is it still ethically, morally, and spiritually wrong for siblings and relatives to have consensual sex?

Please understand I am against children having relations with their parents and uncles and aunts being involved with nieces and nephews. That is just my personal opinion. I do have reservations about siblings engaging in sexual acts, and I have the least reservations about cousins interacting sexually but I do still have some. Part of the reason I say this is from personal experiences. I know some of my relatives that have been involved with each other in good, bad, and abusive relationships, and last but not least, I have been personally involved with a family member.

It was my first time actually but my hymen was not intact. It had been broken by a tampon years ago and I believe that makes a difference. I was in my early 20s when my cousin and I had sex. I had always been physically attracted to him throughout my formative years but I never said anything because I was young, overweight and insecure about myself. Years later I’m very sexually frustrated and while I feel better about myself image, I still have insecurities about sex. Over the years I had masturbated and watch a lot of porn, sometimes thinking of my cousin.

On a side note I feel the need to explain a little about haw culture plays a role in how families interact with each other. Many conservative white Americans have this thing about personal boundaries, physical and mental. While in Latin and European culture we don’t worry about such things. Grown strait men who meet for the first time will exchange hugs or even kisses. Families’ at large gatherings will puppy pile on the floor and/or couch. When I use the term puppy pile I am referring to when you walk into a pet store and puppies are all asleep in a big pile. There is nothing sexual about it. It is simply a desire for closeness and comfort that my culture is accepting of and often practices. That said during our family get together the sleeping arrangements predestined that my cousin and I were to share a bedroom. Being Latin meant we didn’t sleep on opposite side of the room but with each other on the same bed. My cousin and I were close so of course before going to bed we talked. The subject came up and I tried to explain to my cousin that I was insecure about my body and that I had low self esteem. After several minutes of him trying to say that I have a great body and that I’m crazy for not thinking so, he said. “Here let me show you what you do to me.” He took my hand and put it on his erection. Things progressed from there and we had sex that night and the next. I will admit I had my reservations about it, I had my questions and of course wondered if I had crossed some sort of line. But the act its self felt great, I felt safe and my cousin gave me plenty of opportunities to back out and say no. I don’t feel like I was taken advantage of or that I was somehow manipulated, but if I was it was my own fault for not seeing it and saying no while I had the chance. And I know without a doubt, that if I had said no, my cousin would have respected that. In fact the next night after having sex twice I wanted to continue and it was I that made the conscious decision to get him back in the mood and hard again. He even said that he was surprised that I was willing because as I had always been the most level headed innocent and pure of my sisters.

My cousin in gone now (he lives in another state) and I have no Idea if the sexual relationship is going to continue or not. Whether or not it does I still have my questions which brought me to this article. I really wish there was more research and literature on the subject mainly centered on the functioning, health and spirituality of the relationship between the parties without the subject or possibility of children. I am grateful to have the opportunity to share my story and opinion. And I will do my best to keep anyone posted on the unfolding of this very rocky journey.

Sincerely, Saiya.


mathematics 4 years ago

Incest is a part of absolutely everyones geneology. It has to be. If it wasn`t, and we calculated back 1000 years, which is about 32 generations, that equals more than 4.2 billion people (equation, 2 to the power of 32). Meaning that 1000 years ago more than 4.2 billion people would have to had been living at the same time to end up with a human today who is not at all imbred. So it`s impossible that not a single person in the whole world doesn`t have histories of this in varying degrees in ancestry.

The closer the relations are the more chance of defects in the resulting child (in terms of procreation) so it`s better if the relations are further apart.

All sexual acts between children and adults is criminal. Consenting adults is something completely different, and as long as it`s consensual and mentally and emotionally acceptible for all involved parties it`s okay.

I have a friend who was mortified about her secret sexual relationship with her brother, it is consentual but she`s deeply traumatized about it. I don`t know how much of that comes from society or what, but she`s terrified of getting found out and going to jail, even to afraid to tell her psychologist. Sometimes the secret is worse than the actions you know?

Anyways, there`s a lot of stigma about insest, I personally think sibling and cousin relations is gross, but that`s my own opinion, like I wouldn`t do it. But if we think about it, everyone has this in their ancestry, it`s absolutely impossible that no one doesn`t. If we calculated 2000 years ago, there would have to had been more than 18 (what`s the number bigger than quadrillion?) population on the earth.

Anyways, we shouldn`t stigmatize so much.


bort 4 years ago

Me and my half sster have a consinting relationship. The problem we have though is the fact that socioty deems it wrong so it tears her up inside and fears reprocutions of getting caught. We both love each other very much but she fears family and friends not approving of us.


william 4 years ago

The subject matter importantand It is fact that sex is not only for producing the offspring but to associate one sex with other to be naturally completing one other desire. The body is charged particle it tries to meet with opposite sex to become neutral.. It do not have any meaning of relationship, brother , sister. mom dauther. niece , nephew all name is given by society. these relation makes the people sick. If sister is to have sex realtionship with boy distant long for sex requirement why it can not be with her brother not all time but occasionally , not for offspring but sex requirement , at least kissing and rubbibg , openely talking for sex . I do not think there will be any problem if both are agree for sex relation when both are exfcited for sex . Even many time it has been observed that girl have sex with her brother secetely . why it so restricted or taboo made for sex relationship. In modern time the ae boy and girl goes up 30 years and they waiting for marriage but nature do not wait for it when thay need sex and it is not available they are frustrated and spoils there carrier whereas sex was is available in there house thay can have sex with there mother. and sister aunt and young daughter can have sex with her brother what is harm after sex thay will be as pure as goldi but society makes them sicks. concluding it that sex can have with any body , no relatrion even if animal do not have adverse effec on health thay can try with sex wth any animal and socety should celelbrate it as good things . Sex should be celebrated by socielty. there must be have sex naked dance in one two day in week then person become more excoted for work.


dashingclaire profile image

dashingclaire 4 years ago from United States Author

I personally don't agree with sexual relations between close family members. I have gotten many comments from people that agree and engage in consensual incest. Everyone has a right to their personal opinion because they have to live with the decision and consequences. The hub was a historical review of "kissing cousins." The hub has turned out to be much more.


dom-scott 4 years ago

Personally, i think, 2 people, who consent, regardless or kinship, should be free to enjoy sexual pleasure if they practise safe sex. As for relationships, parental and sibling incest isn't right due to the genetic issues. Cousin... They can do as they please. But as i see it, no matter what is said, it will all carry on. You cannot stop love. They shouldn't be looked down on or judged for their actions.


Saint 4 years ago

Good


norberto 4 years ago

I have read all the comments. Very interesting. I respect all opinions.

I conclude that we must not mix abuse with incest ( incest is not necessarily abuse ). I talk about consensual incest. Those of Mackenzie Phillips and Kathryn Harrison have amazed me, because of the personalities involved. The former involved in a world of drugs the latter in a " normal" world. Both of long term. We, humans, feel the necessity of satisfying our sexual instincts, respecting the rules of our society.

To my mind the Kathryn case was absolutely GSA, and that of Mack.. was absolutely a mutual morbid desire. Both consented to and participated in willingly.

Sex experts say that this kind of sexual intercourse is at a higher level than a normal one, in the sense that the pleasure underwent in orgasms are multiplied by ten.


incest4ever 4 years ago

My sister and I have three babies.All are fine and perfectly normal.We started when she was 9 and she had first at 13.We couldn't be happier and our parents are now ok with our incest love.


Abbies 4 years ago

Cousin marriages are very common in many part of the world currently


Blahh 4 years ago

Poor charles wasn't even his fault :(


badrider337 3 years ago

My oldest step daughter who was 20yrs old at the time,met her real brother for the first time after 16 years of seperation.my stepdaughter at the time was well on her way to a promising career in chilfrens services..it wasn't long beforemy stepdaughter was full into a sexual relationship with full brother,she quit her fromising career studies,and came down tohis level of existance involving lies,and drugs and living on the dole...As i hav been asingle but responsible working perant for the last 11 years,and had single handadly raised my step daughter and her 4 younger brothers and sisters,the correct way,it was a big shock to the rest of the family members..The end result was my stepdaughter moved in with her real mother,who prior to our break up..showed her own abnormal attraction to her own brother i might add...here my step daughter continued her relationship in secret with her brother under the approving eyes of her mother..until her current husband was caught out with his dick in a 15 year old ralitive.....lol,now that love nest has busted up..i guess its natural justice..but the end resultof mystepdaughters and herbrothers actions is that it has anything but destroyed our family..i have dishowned my stepdaughter,and heryounger brothers and sisters have no wishto see her at all.The stepdaughter is often the butt of incestuous jokes within the family now..I guess she made her bed,now,she can lay in it!..she has ruined her life,how can she ever face her family,her grande parents or her uncles,aunts and cousins knowing we know what she did...the shame she must bare for the rest of her life...morals still exist here in Australia,but that doesn't mean our kids will take them on board and inbrace these morals.


step-sister (continuation of badrider337) 3 years ago

in continuation to badrider337's story...

Sonya was my step sister who had everything going for her in life. she was bought up for about 20yrs in the care of my father which was the only person she ever knew as her father. her mother, cindy was a drug addict an was rumored to be having sex with her brother craig/dritch. sonya ran into her full blooded brother Conan, after 16yrs of no contact with him. they began a sexual relationship an sonya wanted dad and the rest of the family to support their "relationship". she admitted everything, about how they were having sex behind the rocks at Frankston beach and how they were "in-love". Soon enough they both ran off to Sydney as none of the family would support their "relationship". then sonya rang dad wanting to come home as they ran out of money, food and they had no where to stay. cindy was meant to drop conan off somewhere far far away from sonya and sonya was practically under house arrest for her own good. couple months down the track sonya moved in with her mother cindy an was still in contact with conan we soon found out. but we also learnt that conan an sonya's monther CINDY was letting them continue their sexually incest disgusting relationship! and to this day they are still continuing it.

(names changed in this to protect true identity)


3 years ago

I have to wonder, why do people care at all about incest? They say it's because it's the genetic damage that is done. But studies have found that children born of first generation incest (two consanguinous parents who are not themselves the result of incest) have just a 1% increase in probability of having birth defects, 4% instead of the normal 3%. That number jumps when children of incest begin incestuous relationships and conceive (2nd generation incest), but is still under 10%. (I think it was 6 or 8%.) It is only after that, that genetic anomalies begin showing up with regularity.

The taboo against incest is not rational. People become very irrational when they discuss this subject, and that irrationality is (in my experience) based in fear, guilt and shame. All three negative, and all three used for control.

Negative incest (nonconsensual) is damaging. But positive (consensual) incest is frequently empowering and enabling in a way that is not understood because of the taboo and the guilt, shame and fear that surrounds it.

Incest is a means to a level of love, trust and intimacy that cannot be achieved any other way, if it is done mutually, consensually, and with respect and consideration for all involved.

In many cases where incest is negative, the fact that it is negative can be traced not to the experience itself, but to the response from others when the incest is revealed. They throw guilt, shame and fear upon the persons involved, and essentially do them emotional damage and then make them think the damage was done by the incest.

Is all incest positive? No. But many times, it is turned negative because of the reaction from others, when the experience itself was either positive or neutral. It is the projection of fear, guilt and shame that many times is the damaging part, not the incest itself.

In cases where incest happens nonconsensually, that constitutes rape, just as would any other form of non-consensual sex. But consensual sex is just that, and the responsibility for the repercussions falls upon the shoulders of those who consented to it.

I do not personally engage in incest, and I never have. I also do not know of anyone in any branch of my family who does. Ironically, I have two female cousins I would very much like to have sex with, neither of whom is related to me by blood at all (their father was adopted), but I will never have a chance to be intimate with them, despite the fact that I know they both would like to have sex with me also, because they believe that it is inappropriate since we are cousins. Even though they both know we are not related by blood at all! In such case, the ONLY reason there is this barrier is that they experience guilt, shame and fear. Imagine what a beautiful relationship could have been between one of them and myself if not for this foolishness.

Incest is a fact of life. It is not going away, ever. No matter how irrationally it is responded to, how much it is unreasonably feared, associated with shame or guilt. It is happening, and it will always happen, and that is so because it is simple human nature. We are made to have sex when we have the chance to have sex with someone we find attractive.

Consensual incest is the domain of those who engage in it as a choice. It is not your business or mine if they do so, as long as nobody is hurt. And if they happen to have a child, the chance of it having birth defects from incest is very nearly statistically insignificant.

So when you think of incest,and you get your knickers in a twist, stop and think for a moment. WHY? There's no rational, reasonable answer - unless it's nonconsensual.

I'm in the United States, and I can tell you this is hands down the single biggest taboo here. It is alive and well, both as our biggest taboo and as something people engage in regardless. When people grow up and realize that it's not their business, the world will be a better place. Most of the damage done isn't done by the incest, it's done by the "do-gooders" who over-react after the fact and make it something people learn to feel bad about.

Unless it's nonconsensual... leave the sex to the privacy of the people having it. It's not your business. And stop spreading guilt, shame and fear: they only make the world a worse place.


whyshouldiworry 3 years ago

On Dallas Series, John Ross Ewing just married his 1st cousin in this late episode ending this season. It was common on plantations because they mainly originated from royalty in UK. They didn't want them to marry outside of their royal bloodline. Jerry Lee Lewis was not married to his first cousin. I think she was his 2nd cousin. Their marriage would not have been legal at that time if she had been 1st. I think in the movie of his life, the wife was depicted upset because she was actually a 2nd cousin and it remained reported wrong for hype. I know two different couples that were married because they were 1st cousins on the mother's side and wasn't noticed when getting their marriage certificates.

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