Damaged Goods

The best of all that money could buy

You gave my brother, sister and I

Blue collar work and sacrifice

Love is always worth the price

---------------------------------------------

Don the uniform, time to say bye

Afraid and uncertain, ready to cry

Buck up, be strong, your best advice

And love is always worth the price

---------------------------------------------

Hard to be brave when you are shy

New place, new faces and no ally

Nuns with stern frowns, eyes like ice

Don’t tell me love is worth the price

---------------------------------------------

Tight ship was steered with a lie

Bad child turned into a butterfly

Turned my stomach over twice

Don’t tell me love is worth the price

--------------------------------------------

Surprise attack when dare to defy

Crack of a ruler, who, where, nearby

Pain in my gut, the fear I excise

Don’t tell me love is worth the price

--------------------------------------------

Bad, bad, boy the teacher did imply

Thrashed in the locker, afraid he'd die

Epilepsy it seems was his only vice

Don’t tell me love is worth the price

---------------------------------------------

No one to believe, you must comply

Uniform, nuns and church belie

Their sinister, secret holding device

Don’t tell me love is worth the price

---------------------------------------------

Truth, someday, once met with a sigh

Promises broken no way to deny

Damage control will not suffice

Don’t tell me love is worth the price

---------------------------------------------

Find it hard to take

28 comments

TheManWithNoPants profile image

TheManWithNoPants 5 years ago from Tucson, Az.

Dark but beautiful and awesome Amy. I'm the first commenter!!

jim


Amy Becherer profile image

Amy Becherer 5 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

I just got this one published! Thanks for checking it out and I love your awesome comment, Jim. Thank you for your support. It is very important to me


epigramman profile image

epigramman 5 years ago

......yes deep and mysterious so I must read this once again - but you write with such pride and conviction -(and perhaps between the lines - sorrow and regret) but every line speaks of passion and intelligence that it's hard not to recognize great artful writing when you read these words - and if it deserves another read (as all of your writing does) the reader knows one thing for sure: there is a complex, intricate and brave mind working here (and sometimes like life itself - a work in progress!)


epigramman profile image

epigramman 5 years ago

..yes and I love your choice (once again) of a telling video as your visual and musical theme ....... it's a MAD WORLD ....because people are in control ....and then again, perhaps not!!!!!


Micky Dee profile image

Micky Dee 5 years ago

I see so much love in your work. It shines through. Your words, your videos, your passion. Love may be worth the price. So much love pours out of you - and yet - I know you feel empty as you write so beautifully. But "this" will hone and temper your beauty. God bless you!


Amy Becherer profile image

Amy Becherer 5 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Dear Colin, I appreciate beyond words your beautiful appreciation for my thoughts. You give me the gifts of validation and understanding. Merry Christmas, my friend.


Amy Becherer profile image

Amy Becherer 5 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Dear Micky, Thank you for giving me your time and thoughts. You give me food for thought, And though many of my pieces are dark, writing here makes me full rather than empty. It brings the dark to light. You and everyone that read my offerings give my experiences meaning and fill me with courage. Thank you for that gift. Merry Christmas


vietnamvet68 profile image

vietnamvet68 5 years ago from New York State

Amy it's great that you can share your feelings in these Poems. Some of us have seen those dark places in life and understand your feelings. God Bless you my dear friend. May you find the Peace and Happiness you seek in lifes joys. Enjoy your holiday


Amy Becherer profile image

Amy Becherer 5 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Dear sweet vietnamvet68, As always, thank you for your most generous comments and best wishes. I am so glad you visited because we all need all the friends we can gather, especially at Christmas. All the hustle and plans and high emotions make this a particularly difficult time for the lonely, those without family, friends or homes. I miss and worry about my homeless friends, who I had the pleasure of seeing everyday from my window on the world on Locust Street. They had so little and just a smile and "how are you" made them so happy. They never knew how much they gave me...the ability to make a difference with the little I had to offer. Blessings are all around us and I am truly grateful for what I've been given. Merry Christmas, vietnamvet68, and thank you for being a friend.


Amy Becherer profile image

Amy Becherer 5 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Micky Dee, I was thinking about your commentary and I had an epiphany at the kitchen sink. Yes, you are right. Initially, I thought, wait a minute, I'm not empty. Yes, yes, yes, I get it and you are very perceptive. Right now, I am "running on empty"...not empty as a person and there is a big difference. Thanks for the shake up and a wake up call from my friend, Micky Dee! Merry Christmas to me!!! Thanks, dude.


sligobay profile image

sligobay 5 years ago from east of the equator

Catharsis requires us to vent our anger and pain and when we are cleansed, to write anew. I loved your musical selection and the "moving images of youth" constructing escape vehicles, horse, auto, sailboat, home; etc.. So much pain and anger can be processed through poetry for the poet and the reader. As you know, I had great identity with your theme. There is no price on love - it is worth it for its own sake, but comes in a variety pack. Merry, Merry. Thank you for your beautiful words and fine mind.


Amy Becherer profile image

Amy Becherer 5 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Dear friend, Sligobay, your writing was the inspiration for this poem. Thank you for your understanding, as I knew you would. Although, I was one of the fortunate to have escaped sexual abuse, I did not escape unscathed. I vomited every morning before school until I entered the 4th grade. I saw the worry and agony in my parent's eyes and I choked back and never did again. But, it was sheer will and my love for mom and dad that kept my secrets. Your words and example lead my way. Thank you for your eloquence in writing about a topic of such ugliness. You give me courage. Merry, Merry to you.


A.A. Zavala profile image

A.A. Zavala 5 years ago from Texas

Such a beautiful form of disclosure, in the form of poetry. It's my hope that your able to make peace by sharing your pain in prose. Thank you for sharing.


saddlerider1 profile image

saddlerider1 5 years ago

It's a mad world for sure, I shared my pain of abuse often enough in my poems and short stories and it releases the darkness in one's soul.

There is so much to be thankful for and to look at your fellow man/woman with love. I have met a few homeless in my time and it's not a pleasant site to be on the streets, and many of us are one paycheck away from joining them.

I hope you have found peace and love in your life especially this time of year. You write with passion and artistry. Merry Christmas to you and yours.


Amy Becherer profile image

Amy Becherer 5 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Augustine, thank you for your words and, yes, there is validation and release in writing it down. It somehow cements it as real, which it is, but when given form it can be put away. Of course, there are those still silent and the church has not recognized it in the manner it warrants nor taken adequate responsibility. Their admissions have been "like pulling teeth" and quickly glossed over with the "more important" issues of the Vatican presiding. What the church doesn't seem to grasp is the most important of their tasks is the well being of the children. After all they will be the future church and, if nothing else, the financial future of this big business. God could not be pleased and one wonders how the pope sleeps at night. I would imagine once the coffers are empty, he will rely on Ambien. My issues were more "control through fear"; abuse of a different sort, but it affected me and should not have been the modus operandi for a learning environment. Mostly, I learned mistrust and fear. Thank you for reading this and have a Merry Christmas, A.A.


Amy Becherer profile image

Amy Becherer 5 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Dear Saddlerider1, I don't know how I've missed you, but from here I am going to check out your writing, because it definitely is a subject close to my heart. I figured out at an early age that I did not like the ambiguity I saw in the Church, with all due respect to those who find comfort and peace within. I remember the abject fear I had of the nuns. In second grade, Sister Angela was already in her mid 70's with 42 young ones in the classroom. She first made sure we understood that all things are possible with God. Once understood, she proceeded to tell us that one fine Spring day, she had a student in her classroom that was disobedient and she and the rest of the room watched as God turned him into a butterfly and he flew out the window. As a gullible, impressionable 2nd grader, I lived in fear of seeing or having that happen to me. One just never knew! As ridiculous as it sounds, in the classroom, at that age, I believed that this "woman of God" only spoke the truth. Hell, I still believed in Santa Claus. So, although I was a good student, I hated school and that never went away. Thank you for stopping, reading and sharing. I look forward to reading your work, and, Merry Christmas, saddlerider1, to you and yours.


sligobay profile image

sligobay 5 years ago from east of the equator

Why Amy, am I to surmise that you no longer believe in Santa? He never hurt anyone. LOL Before I entered the third grade at a new parochial school, the 'public school kids' next door told me they left Catholic school after Sister Justina threw a boy out the window and he died. She taught third graders.

When September came, I was led into my new classroom and introduced to my new teacher- yes, it was none other than ....you guessed it... Sister Ann Justina. She was older than dirt. I burst out in tears before I was even assigned a seat. Michael Doran had a hearing and speech disorder. He had bilateral hearing aids. During the first month, she boxed his ears from behind with two cupped hands and he let out a piercing scream of agony. None of us forgot the torture and each of us did anything and everything to avoid her ire. She was a terrorist.

Thanks for mentioning the 'butterfly' story. We must feel our fear so that we are no longer afraid. Peace and happiness to you.


Old Poolman profile image

Old Poolman 5 years ago from Rural Arizona

Amy, I read your hub several times, and each time got a new meaning from your writing. I like the style wherein you leave much of the interpretation up to the reader. That is an art it looks like you have perfected. Great Hub, even though it leans a little toward the dark side. Just keep on writing.


Amy Becherer profile image

Amy Becherer 5 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Oh, Sligobay, Oh, Sligobay, Oh, Sligobay, how completely unbearable. I, literally, cannot speak right now.


Amy Becherer profile image

Amy Becherer 5 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Thank you, Poolman (I can't bring myself to put "Old" in front because you are not old). Thank you for expressing enough interest to read this piece more than once! I work at exactly what you describe. I attempt to be concise, dead honest, from personal experience with enough ambiguity to allow the reader to surmise. Thank you for your very perceptive commentary. Merry Christmas to you!


MartieCoetser profile image

MartieCoetser 5 years ago from South Africa

And yet, we are willing to pay the price for love until we eventually realize that we are paying for hate. What a rude awakening! This now reminds me of Jacob, working seven years for Rachel just to be rewarded with the opposite, Lea. Heartfelt poem, Amy. Voted up!


Amy Becherer profile image

Amy Becherer 5 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

You are such an intelligent person, Martie, that your comments are as thought provoking and brain activating as any hub! Thank you, Martie, and have a great holiday.


BobbiRant profile image

BobbiRant 5 years ago from New York

It can be hard, especially as a young person, to find the world can have teeth and it can bite, very hard sometimes. But when we finally discover, hey our voice is as important as the people trying to hold us down, then we finally rise up and be heard, it's a wonderful day when that happens. Rise, rise, my Dear, keep rising, you have much to say and we have much to ponder by what truths you tell us. Keep your voice, never falter for a moment, the butterfly has emerged and is beautiful indeed!


Amy Becherer profile image

Amy Becherer 5 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Oh, BobbiRant, what a beautiful brain you have. Although, the butterfly story was real, I also wrote it to be interpreted exactly as you did. As a writer, I do attempt to create in a way that leaves something to the imagination of the reader so that the piece will not have limited relevance. Thank you so much for your observant and exploring nature. I see that in everything you write and I know when I read a BobbiRant creation, I am going to see an interesting, entertaining, fresh look at something that needs looking at! I value your opinion more than I can say. You are the best, my friend.


Spirit Whisperer profile image

Spirit Whisperer 5 years ago from Isle of Man

A disclosure of very personal and private feelings. Very honest and touches the soul. Thank you.


Amy Becherer profile image

Amy Becherer 5 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Thank you, Spirit Whisperer, which is a beautiful name by the way. I appreciate your time and understanding commentary.


bruzzbuzz profile image

bruzzbuzz 4 years ago from Texas , USA

Your writing is beautiful. I wish I had a tenth of the talent you possess.


Amy Becherer profile image

Amy Becherer 4 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Thank you, bruzzbuzz. I just found your comment here and I am sorry I didn't see it sooner. I got no notice of it.

bruzzbuzz, there is no shortage of talent on your end. You are gifted. Its the differences in all of us that makes writing an art; the way we see things and then give it expression is a gift really, that the writer offers to the reader. I love the way you write.

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