Dealing with inappropriate advances from your boss.

Is the boss honest at all time?
Is the boss honest at all time?

If you were to accept an advance from your boss you must first find out all the conditions that underline the advance.

In a tough economy where money is hard to come by employees who have received advances from their bosses may accept it because of their inability to pay their bills on time. However, to know whether or not an advance proposed by your boss is inappropriate your boss would have had to initiate the offer without the employee suggesting the advance. If this definition satisfies the notion being addressed than under such circumstance the boss gesture is either out of good will or he maybe securing his asset.

We must also keep in mind that “inappropriate advances” does not always imply sexual harassment. Inappropriate advances whether it is from your boss or a coworker simply defined an action that has occurred. To know whether or not the advance implies sexual harassment we must be able to identify the act of “inappropriate advances” as being a physical contact that led to sexual harassment or a verbal disrespect. As we should notice, the word advance only defined the act of moving forward it does not by anyway described the action of which is inappropriate.

Advances means to bring or move forward as to say "progress". The word that is in question here is “advances”. In this case advances can mean anything. Inappropriate advances from my boss can mean that he subliminally offered to give me a pay raise if I finish his work for him. There is no sexual harassment there, but no one can argue that this is not another form of harassment. A boss who is egotistical can be overwhelmingly aggressive and therefore makes inappropriate advances towards his employees by way of intimidation. Since we live in a sexually oriented society a boss's advances mean sexual intent.

As far as sexual harassment is concern that can be a problem in the workplace. Men & women are both susceptible of being sexually harassed by their boss. The boss inappropriate advances in this case may imply an offer suggested to the employee for return of sexual pleasure. Or it may involve inappropriate verbal communication between the boss and the employee. To prevent inappropriate advances from the boss the employee must keep a professional work attitude at all times.

To occasionally engage in playful name calling with the boss may invite him to initiate an inappropriate advances. I am no way implying that you should be serious at all times, the workplace is suppose to be a friendly environment. To some extent your coworkers are your distant family. Come to think of it you spent more time with them than your close relatives. Most often the boss will not initiate inappropriate advances if the employee does not invite it. But I do understand that sometimes certain bosses can be irrationally aggressive.

Employees are assets to a company their skills are like anchors of chains that hold a boat (a company) steady without them the boat the company won’t stay still they market shares would fluctuate like a traffic light. When business are slow the good employees are always the last to let go. At times, a boss will do whatever is necessary to keep these employees satisfy. In which case giving these employees an advance may not be viewed as inappropriate, especially if the boss and the employee shares good relations.

Since the notion in this context suggest that the advance is inappropriate, it may be advantageous to look at it from that perspective. Although a detail explanation as to what constitute an “inappropriate advances” would be helpful for this argument, not having to mentioned it in the title sort of live us to imagine otherwise. In which case I have imagined that the inappropriate advances that is in question involved an egotistical boss who makes inappropriate advances towards his employees via intimidation.

Further more, if we should look at the advance as being inappropriate, we must then consider a few conditions. First, we can assume that the boss has ulterior motives that are formatted to deceive the employee. Second, we can conclude that the boss advances are simply a probe designed to search from the employee's life existing economic weakness caused by this recession. The latter can be viewed as a technique used by the employer to identify the employees that have become codependent of the employer. Those employees who have become totally dependent on the employer can now be used to do functions that they would not have done had they had an alternative to diverge into other industry.

The first option mentioned above implied that the employer may look to deceive the employee into having him / her think that it’s Ok not to panic under this recession. Meanwhile, the focus is to initiate an incentive for the employee to work longer hours for the same pay. This technique work because under a recession the opportunity for the employer to mislead the employees into having them think that they may lose their job can easily plan.

Exploitation is always a key factor to be aware of no employer wants to pay more than they should and no employee wants to received less for their hard work. Therefore, the way the employee should deal with this kind of inappropriate advances is not to accept it. Knowingly accept an advance from the boss does not makes it inappropriate, but if the employee knows for sure the intent behind the offer then accepting it would be the same as consenting to the consequences that comes with the offer. By accepting, you the employee have given consent for your boss to ask of you to do a favor that may seem inappropriate.

If you were to accept an advance from your boss you must first find out all the conditions that accompany the offer. Any failure to know ahead of time what those conditions are may cause you the employee to find yourself in the same situation as AIG. This administration is serious; every transaction is under the microscope. Any company that has accepted money from the Obama’s administration has virtually asked for the government hands of marriage. Although it is help the stimulus money that the government offer these companies seems somewhate like an invitation to a joint venture lol.

Likewise, by accepting inappropriate money from your boss you have asked him for his hand of marriage. Now the term “employees are asset to a company” becomes more literally acceptable in your case.

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Comments 33 comments

Coolbreezing profile image

Coolbreezing 7 years ago from New York, New York Author

I wrote this article for Helium but out of all the people, I’m the only one who got the title confuse.  For some reason, I immediately thought that the title implied advance offered  by a boss for some ulterior motives. I know that ulterior motive may involve sexual intent but never came to mind that the title was meant to talk about sexual harassment at work. Perhaps it’s because I’m a man or is it because I never work an environment where the boss made advances on me. Perhaps they did, I’m just too out of it to have notice it.  Well maybe I should change the tile.


goldentoad profile image

goldentoad 7 years ago from Free and running....

I'd like an advance of any kind


Pest profile image

Pest 7 years ago from A Couch, Lake Odessa, MI

I was a store manager at a W*l M*art type store in Michigan...When i took the avcdvance it seemed great! I had finally arrived...then the company cut all upper management Co-mngmnt positions...I lost my job...somwhere in aisle 13. I never worked there again. Toad go to one of my Hubs so that I can tell you that you have mail. Polizei !!!


AEvans profile image

AEvans 7 years ago from SomeWhere Out There

I would never do such a thing, I was a boss and I work with others in charge and I certainly wouldn't accept their hands in marraige.LOL:) By the way the little dog I chose was adorable, you should read the comment I left for you, next time I will make you something BIG!!!:)


Coolbreezing profile image

Coolbreezing 7 years ago from New York, New York Author

I did read it, your comment was nice ....were you making an advances at me? From now on I'm going to keep my mind open for those who might be making advances at me. I think one of the reason why I confuse the the above title on Helium was because I haven't been aware of those who makes advances at me.


Pest profile image

Pest 7 years ago from A Couch, Lake Odessa, MI

I soooo confused...


AEvans profile image

AEvans 7 years ago from SomeWhere Out There

Coolbreezing: Are you saying I am your boss???Lol:)

Pest: You should have read the most recent article , you were also a star in it, where have you been?? My goodness you were probably ice fishing again...Lol


Pest profile image

Pest 7 years ago from A Couch, Lake Odessa, MI

what ???  your hub??  Where??/   I think I was on a four day bender and didn't know it! Email me!


AEvans profile image

AEvans 7 years ago from SomeWhere Out There

Pest you didin't know it , now you have to find it!!! hehehehe!!!Lol


Pest profile image

Pest 7 years ago from A Couch, Lake Odessa, MI

I would not want to be involved in the corporate world at all today. i am happy with my own hell right here on the farm. I am my own boss.

AE You has a mail from me!


Coolbreezing profile image

Coolbreezing 7 years ago from New York, New York Author

You may very well be my boss, you never know, it might be a good thing. I certainly wouldn't mind you taking advances at me.


Christoph Reilly profile image

Christoph Reilly 7 years ago from St. Louis

Find out what?  What happened?  It's not that I'm nosey, it's that I'm...um...a sociologist studying the effects of writers working on the same "Writer cum Social network", and this just feels like something that should be included in my research.

Nice hub, Coolbreezing. I had never thought of the "money advance" angle, just the sex one, so it was interesting to read and your conclusions make perfect sense.


Pest profile image

Pest 7 years ago from A Couch, Lake Odessa, MI

I have a specimen for your research Chris...


Christoph Reilly profile image

Christoph Reilly 7 years ago from St. Louis

You aren't looking for a sociologist, Pest, you want a proctologist.


AEvans profile image

AEvans 7 years ago from SomeWhere Out There

Pest: "You've Got MAil"!!!!!!:)

CoolBreezing: We will never tell aaahhhh so many secrets , I need a treasure box to hold them all. :)


Coolbreezing profile image

Coolbreezing 7 years ago from New York, New York Author

Thanks for your comment Christ, I guest I'm the only low wage worker here,  because anyone who doesn't make enough money certainly knows what an advance is. They may pay it back in a different way than I would but an advance is what they look forward to.


Pest profile image

Pest 7 years ago from A Couch, Lake Odessa, MI

Chris...is that a butt dr?? I need a head removed.

Coolbreaze you can kick us out anytime you want! Especially that Chris dude...

AE you have more mail...


Pest profile image

Pest 7 years ago from A Couch, Lake Odessa, MI

Now i am not confused...I have taken many advances...Yeh, beware, those creeps will ask the world from you once you take an advance, then you feel obligated. i worked like a dog for six months paying off an advance..


Coolbreezing profile image

Coolbreezing 7 years ago from New York, New York Author

Someone is finally on the same page as me. I was beginning to think I was alone in this matter. Now as my friend Pest said, him too has taken advances.  Advances could be tricky, if you're really a good worker, your boss may offer you advances on top of advances trying to place you in a position where it's hard for you to pay it back. Once that happen, he owns you literally, no joke aside.  Some folks have offered the backdoor as a repayment.  Advances can led you to do many things. I'm glad Pest that you work to pay back your advances.


Christoph Reilly profile image

Christoph Reilly 7 years ago from St. Louis

Coolbreezing: Well, I know what an advance is, but have only heard the term "inappropriate advances" when it was applied to advances of the sexual nature, much as you discussed in the beginning of your hub. After restructuring my thinking, I can see how a boss could use advances to get work out of you that you should not be asked to do, hence "inappropriate". In short, I am just agreeing with you and your premise. I didn't mean to come off as though I didn't know what an advance on my pay is...and I could certainly use the money.


Jewels profile image

Jewels 7 years ago from Australia

It's good advice to know all the conditions that apply to any work agreement. This recession is bringing out the truth and you can see the best and worst in people, especially in the workplace. In Australia for example, there are many businesses closing, in totallity. There are also those businesses hanging on as best they can and in doing so are negotiating less days work, with of course less pay, but it means for the moment you have a job. This leaves hope at least. It is better than retaining your current rate of pay and hours, but there is absolutely no guarantee you will have a job in a month. At least if we can cut the current outlay for wages, we may ALL have a chance to keep working and earning.

At least this recession is sorting out the humane from the inhumane. And it makes one wiser the next time advances are made and in whose interests are they being made.


Coolbreezing profile image

Coolbreezing 7 years ago from New York, New York Author

Yes Jewels, I agree with you ...in hard time anything you get count. But one thing you should keep in mind is that the recession didn't bring some of us down, there are those who were already doing bad before the recession. However, those who have a job during this recession, although it may not pay much at least it is better than nothing.  Nonetheless, from my explanation, those who are familiar with "inappropriate advances" are those workers who are at the bottom.  The reason why, is because that worker is experiencing hard time to pay his bills, he is often late on his payments. He sometime asked the boss for an advance so that he can make is payment on time. In this case the advance is not inappropriate. However, when it is the boss who initiate the offer for the advance, they maybe some string attach to it. This type of "inappropriate advance" is not always present in big companies. It is something you'll see in small businesses where the bosses knows the employees by name. Another meaning for the dictionary.

Yes Christ. i understand where you coming from. Your point is well taking. However, if you're only going by logic, you might get the statement confuse too.  As a man, I'm not thinking about being sexually harass because to my knowledge, I have not been harass.  However, my immediate response was to apply the statement to my life as a low wage worker, and what i dug out is those experiences.


Coolbreezing profile image

Coolbreezing 7 years ago from New York, New York Author

Rex on Helium said:

You didn't include the url, but with this title, I'd say that it would include advances for ANY improper reason. In that case, your article would be on the mark. It doesn't have to be sexual advances in order for it to be wrong.

I've been sexually harassed by a supervisor (I never reported it, but I did deal with it, and it never happened again....she was married, and hinting that we could always talk to her hubby about a threesome put an end to it REAL quick! Hahaha) More difficult to deal with was a boss that wanted me to do all his work for him, which he of course took credit for. That behavior was also wrong.

To most people, since this is such a sexually oriented society, a boss's advances mean sexual intent. But that isn't the only thing they mean. So I don't think you misinterpreted the meaning. It is simply that a lot of others are focusing on only one aspect of it.

I will inject here that there was another time that could have been considered sexual harassment, only I was flattered. I declined anyway, but the woman in question was very lovely and very picky. In that case, I took it as a pat on the back rather than an insult.

Suggestion; why not leapfrog and also mention the sexual aspect while emphasizing that this is not the only inappropriate behavior that is encountered? Get through to people that sexual harassment is only one kind of harassment...an important one, but that there are others too. Does this make sense? You could edify quite a few people.


Coolbreezing profile image

Coolbreezing 7 years ago from New York, New York Author

I took my man Rex advise to restructure my argument,  so how do you like me now.


Coolbreezing profile image

Coolbreezing 7 years ago from New York, New York Author

By the way Rex  I wasn't able to leapfrog this article again.  I have done it three times already. They wont allow me to do it again.


sophiewf profile image

sophiewf 7 years ago from US

excellent hub, thaks for sharing this information and advice.


Coolbreezing profile image

Coolbreezing 7 years ago from New York, New York Author

You welcome love.


Single Mama profile image

Single Mama 7 years ago

You guys are silly (in regards to the comments). I likes it. It's very uncomfortable when one of your superiors makes any type of inappropriate advance, sexual or not.


Coolbreezing profile image

Coolbreezing 7 years ago from New York, New York Author

Mama I know you're not serious right.  At least I hope not.


Lisa HW profile image

Lisa HW 7 years ago from Massachusetts

Coolbreezing, I'm smiling now that you have explained the meaning of "advances" - because as I was reading your Hub I was thinking of the lecherous boss harrassing the employee, which, of course, made your Hub so odd I couldn't help but keep reading it. :)

I was thinking, "Bad economy or no bad economy - if some boss makes advances people should walk out, never return, sign up for welfare or unemployment or whatever, until they could sue his/her head off in a big bucks lawsuit." :) Now that you've cleared up what you meant by "advances" - well, that's a-whole-nother thing. :) So, in that case, excellent Hub.


Coolbreezing profile image

Coolbreezing 7 years ago from New York, New York Author

Thanks Lisa ....I though I was wrong at first until I read Rex comments.


linjingjing profile image

linjingjing 7 years ago

Good article


conundrum profile image

conundrum 7 years ago

Along the same lines are job-hunters like yours truly feeling they are at the mercy of POTENTIAL employers. I've never been asked to do anything inappropriate (or if I would do so if hired) during interviews, but I can't help wondering if some people have been, and if so, did they feel they had no choice but to agree out of sheer desperation?

Good hub, Coolbreezing. I like the title, btw.

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