Harry's Apology

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By: Wayne Brown


What if Harry Reid apologized? For what, you asked? Oh, possibly you have not heard that Congress packed up and left Washington after their exhaustive debate over the debt ceiling. In their rush to leave they overlooked approving a bill to fund a portion of the Federal Aviation Agency leaving literally thousands of workers without paychecks until the problem can be rectified. Actually, it really was not the Congress that was responsible as the House under the leadership of the Republicans did their part and passed the bill prior to the debt debate and struggle. The bill then went on over to the Senate for approval and that’s where the screw up came.


You see Pigeon-Hole Harry was so busy tossing out bills coming over from the Republican dominated House that he just plain forgot that the folks over at the FAA need to be paid. So, like all the other bills approved by the House Republicans, he tossed it into file 13 and continued to do what he does best…supersede the will of the American people.


Even with Vice-President Biden close by to remind him of the importance of this bill, Reid still managed to file it under Republican trash. Of course, who can depend on Biden for anything except some kind of smart comment at the wrong time? In all likelihood the bill was over looked while the Vice-President was out referring to Tea Party members as “Terrorists.”.


Of course, no much slips by our Magna Cum Laude Graduate President. Even when he was up to his ears planning his 50th birthday party bash in Chicago, probably at taxpayer expense, he had the gumption to note that the bill to pay the FAA had not been sent over for signature. Now it was readily apparent that the House had done their job and that Wild Horse-Pigeon-Hole Dirty Harry Reid and his support staff had dropped the ball in terms of getting the bill processed. But that wouldn’t look good for the Democrats if the President pointed out that fact so in traditional Magna Cum Laude manner, he called for entire Congress to return to Washington and take care of the job to cover Reid’s mistake. Never mind that we are supposed to be looking for ways to reduce spending, it is better that the whole bunch show up than it is if only the spotlight is on the Democratically-controlled Senate.


So, now that you know, what if Harry apologized to the workers over at the FAA? What would he say? If you were his speech writer, how would you spin it for him? Even better, just think of a lie, Harry is not much of one to spin, he just flat out lies. I have given it a bit of thought and I may have at least one approach that Harry can use. Let’s give it a go.


Reid steps to the cluster of microphones assembled hurriedly on the steps of the nations’ capitol building and clears his throat. He has that familiar expression about him and those shifty eyes which dart about looking for the law enforcement officials who, in his mind, he is convinced are coming for him sooner or later…and for good reason. Finally, after looking down and consulting his notes, he speaks into the microphones.


Ladies and gentlemen of our country and specifically all those employees who serve our country so well over at the FAA, I, Democratic Senator Harry Reid, from the great State of Nevada and Democratic Majority Leader in the Senate, am here today at the behest of the President of the United States. I specifically come before you today to bring recognition to all these fine folks over at the Federal Aviation Administration, many of who are among my constituency from the great State of Nevada, These little people work hard at their middle income jobs keeping the skies over America safe day in and day out 365 days per year. As you know, we are in the process of funding our debt obligations and payments. It was this particular item that inspired my thought processes to think ‘what a wonderful time to recognize these wonderful people of the FAA. So, as most you are aware, we approve the pay process over at the FAA on a regular basis and today is no different with one exception. I, the Senate Majority Leader, have placed an amendment to this bill and it has been approved by a majority of those who serve in the Senate. This amendment will extend the pay benefits of the FAA employees for one more year and add a 10% raise for each one beginning with the 15 August pay period. Now, hold you applause please, as we still have business to do on this particular subject. As I stated, the bill and the amendment have passed the Senate and now must go back to the House for approval. Unfortunately, the House did not return to session on this subject therefore I would both challenge and encourage Speaker of the House Boehner to quickly order all members of the House to return to Washington and take care of the needs of their government and its employees before continuing any personal efforts at enjoying a vacation. Speaker Boehner unfortunately is not with us here today as he has already begun his vacation. I urge patience on the part of the FAA employees everywhere and I am sure that I am not speaking out of turn by standing here and apologizing for Speaker Boehner for this significant oversight in the discharge of his duties as Speaker. May God Bless America!”


With the closing remarks, Nancy Pelosi takes her left hand from over her heart, turns and salutes the Vice-President and yells “Play Ball!” Reid quickly takes hold of her arm and pulls her away from the micro-phone to prevent any greater damage.


That is the way I envision it taking place and for good reason. Harry Reid will never apologize to anyone for anything because he has never been wrong about anything. Well there was one time that he was wrong but that was only when he thought he actually was wrong but it turned out that he was right in the first place. Good thing he did not rush forward and apologize to anyone.


If Harry Reid apologizes, things will get strange. Pundits will run forward and again confirm that indeed the world will come to an end in the year 2012 and the change in behavior displayed by Harry Reid is living proof of that fact. America will cringed and hide in their root cellars in fear while Harry continues being Harry. The tides will disappear. The will go out the night after the apology and never return. There will never be a high tide again. Ships will be stuck in the harbors and river channels of America and the world due to Harry’s apology. The stars will shift in the sky and all the familiar constellations will disappear. Scientists will be baffled by this occurrence and realize their studies of the universe have been all for naught.


If Harry Reid apologizes, global warming trends will shift so significantly that members of the Green Peace movement will actually get sunburned. Gold and oil prices will come crashing down with the shift of behavior. Financial markets will wallow and lose ground and the Moody’s will downgrade the American credit rating. Inflation will go through the roof as depression comes to every corner of the economy as a result of Reid’s confession.


But, the single most significant indicator of the impact of an apology from Reid would take place right in his home state. Everyone there would have to go out and buy a new coat in the middle of August. Though the temperatures in Nevada would be well over 100 degrees there would be a chill in the air for you see, as close as Nevada sits to the front gate of Hell, if Hell indeed were freezing over, Nevada would at the very least be getting a dose of ice and snow. If Reid apologized for his error, hell indeed would freeze over and we cannot allow that…too many unknowns and not enough government grants to study the phenomenon.


So while I sit here and day-dream about Dingy Harry Reid apologizing to those innocent folks down at the FAA, it is only a fantasy and I know it. The potential damage from such an action of the part of Mr. Reid would most certainly create social upheaval and imbalance throughout America thus it is in the welfare of all good citizens that we just let it lie and get on with the business of America.




© Copyright WBrown2011. All Rights Reserved.


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Comments 27 comments

manthy profile image

manthy 5 years ago from Alabama,USA

Great hub man - Keep em coming


dahoglund profile image

dahoglund 5 years ago from Wisconsin Rapids

I remember a radio host several years ago labeling Reid as 'the undertaker" which I think of everytime I see and hear him.


Old Poolman profile image

Old Poolman 5 years ago from Rural Arizona

Wayne - I'll bet you when the dust settles on this, they will find a way to blame it on Bush.

I hope our dear friend Harry is squirming a little bit right now, at least I hope so.


CMerritt profile image

CMerritt 5 years ago from Pendleton, Indiana

I'm SURE Keith Olberman is going to attack Reid for this blunder......RIGHT? I mean Chris Matthews is surly going to lead off with this one tonight, ... RIGHT?

There will be a committee formed to find out WHY this happened....RIGHT, a formal investigation?....YEAH?

S M A C K!!!!!!!!

Okay.....I'm better now....

This would make a great letter to the editor of all the newspapers across this country.....so many are not even aware of this idiots actions.


sheila b. profile image

sheila b. 5 years ago

He's ga-ga. He wants to go home to his trees and roses. Let's hope he decides to stay there.


Cardisa profile image

Cardisa 5 years ago from Jamaica

Hi Wayne, I figure with all your "American" hubs, that things are heating up in the US. I don't really follow the US politics but I thought I would just leave a comment to let you know I have been reading your stuff.


Wayne Brown profile image

Wayne Brown 5 years ago from Texas Author

@manthy...Thank you! I am trying! WB

@dahoglund...Great info, DA...I think the man would make a perfect undertaker as long as someone cleaned out the pockets of the deceased before Harry arrived on the scene. WB

@Old Poolman...Yeah, that's the reason Obama said that all of Congress should return so that he can cover this gimp's butt politically. Of course, most of his constituency is made up of illegal Hispanic voters who I doubt read the newspaper or watch television, so Harry has not lost anything.

@CMerritt...You know all that is going to happen don't ya, Chris. Sure! Play Ball! LOL! WB

@sheila b. I am sure glad I don't have any flowers and trees that were bought with tainted taxpayer money. Of course Harry would say that he does not have any either...maybe he should contact Disney and see if he can be a greeter at Fantasyland. WB


Wayne Brown profile image

Wayne Brown 5 years ago from Texas Author

@Cardisa...Thank you. I write on the political side because I get impassioned by particular processes. At heart, I am not a real political guy and I have respect for most perspectives that apply any common sense. The current crop in Washington really toasts me as they are willing to lie, cheat, scheme or whatever to continue the status quo. It it time that we, as voters, became more enlightened and cut through this doublespeak. This recent action on the debt ceiling was disapproved by up to 75% of the voters as shown in a recent survey. When Washington misses the mark that badly, they are basically thumbing their nose at the American public and daring anyone to try and stop them. This bill just passed did nothing more than meet a 30 billion dollar debt service obligation and hand Obama over an additional 800+ billion to spend just as he did the original stimulus package. That is like having a child who needs $20 to go to the movies but giving him/her $1,000 instead. Who is getting hurt here. Sorry...my soapbox is out! Thanks again for reading and commenting. I hope a lot of people read all of this and start thinking for themselves. WB


FitnezzJim profile image

FitnezzJim 5 years ago from Fredericksburg, Virginia

My guess is, if we look around, most of us were not politically oriented people five years ago. To his credit, Obama has changed that.

Remember in November 2012.


Wayne Brown profile image

Wayne Brown 5 years ago from Texas Author

@FitnezzJim...I'd that would be the legacy of Obama, Reid, and Pelosi...the re awaking of conservatism across the nation. Thanks Jim. WB


breakfastpop profile image

breakfastpop 5 years ago

I think that Harry and Nancy may inhabit the same body which would explain why they look so strange and act even worse. By the way, Wayne, hubpages hasn't notified me that you or anyone else wrote a hub. I have to find out what I missed.


Wayne Brown profile image

Wayne Brown 5 years ago from Texas Author

@breakfastpop...I am not getting the traditional notification like I was before either. I occasionally get something but not on the frequency that people are writing and I don't get anything on a lot of the folks that I am following. WB


breakfastpop profile image

breakfastpop 5 years ago

Dear Wayne,

I wrote to hubpages to complain. I'll let you know what happens, if anything.


drbj profile image

drbj 5 years ago from south Florida

Speaking of mucked-up minions, Wayne, Reid wins my vote as the sneakiest and most mucked-up of them all. Let's give him an award!


Wayne Brown profile image

Wayne Brown 5 years ago from Texas Author

@drbj...I think he would be an excellent "used casket" salesman. LOL! WB


Becky 5 years ago

My father, a real Nevada native, hated Dirty Harry Reid for 30 years before his death in 1996. My father had impeccable taste.


Wayne Brown profile image

Wayne Brown 5 years ago from Texas Author

@Becky...Ha! You dad did have good taste and a keen ability to spot an "honest man". I am amazed that he can get re-elected...makes you question the validity of the results. WB


The Frog Prince profile image

The Frog Prince 5 years ago from Arlington, TX

Wait a minute. What is so damned important that it would cause Demwit Harry to miss his pomegranates?

I'm just askin...

Harry knows how to tug on those heart strings!

Great work.

The Frog


sam3m profile image

sam3m 5 years ago from New York

i agree that there has been an awakening of conservatism in the country, and your hub is a good reason why.

reid doesn't have anything to apologize about. the gop in the house attached riders to the bill which made it more difficult for workers to unionize, and to eliminate subsidies for rural airports more than 90 miles from a major city.

your conservative readers don't mention those things, rather group together to fault a liberal because of lack of information or refusal to believe that there are 2 sides to the problem.

i'm sure we'll keep this kind of thing up because it's intellectually attractive to some conservatives and profitable for others.


Wayne Brown profile image

Wayne Brown 5 years ago from Texas Author

@The Frog Prince...Harry's just needing to carry home a few bags of money that he has accumulated in the the past few weeks. Harry doesn't have the big jet like Nancy Pelosi so he is weight restricted! LOL! WB

@sam3m...I was under the impression that the amendment did away with subsides to any airport WITHIN 90 miles of the major airport. The subsidies average out to a cost of $4,000 per flying customer. Moving the boundaries outward only makes sense in the interest to the American taxpayer. If a person wants better service...move closer to an airport that offers it. I can understand subsidizing airports on the short-term to allow them to build a customer base, etc. but after some period of time, if the airport cannot stand on its own after some period then air service in that area just does not make sense. Also, it is my understanding that the House past this legislation weeks ago and Reid ELECTED to forego a vote on it because he did not want to take away from the focus of the debt ceiling debate. In the process, he apparently did not read the legislation and dropped the ball. Harry is the last one with the ball...it was his responsibility to bring it to a vote and he failed. At what point does he owe us an apology for that oversight? WB


sam3m profile image

sam3m 5 years ago from New York

wayne, i'll take your word for the situation and stand corrected.

however, do you see any possibility of the two sides getting together on anything? this congress is breaking records for inactivity.

i believe, and hopefully i'm wrong, that the gop is intentionally prolonging the recession with the collusion of corporations to insure that obama is not re-elected. and i find it hard to believe that anyone looking at the situation since his inauguration couldn't see the same thing.

i realize i'm looking at it through liberal eyes, but it seems so obvious to me.


Wayne Brown profile image

Wayne Brown 5 years ago from Texas Author

@sam3m...Whoa...that's some heavy stuff to deal with before my first cup of coffee. I am certainly no expert on Washington and up until this administration I have not been a "rabid conservative"...note that I didn't say "Republican". I will give you my best take on it as a guy on the street just looking at things from a common sense perspective. With regard to the right and the corporations getting together to defeat Obama, I just don't see enough singular thought and unity there to accomplish that task. Different companies are in different places at the due in great part to how they were positioned before the financial tumble of November 2008. The company I work for, for example, had already taken a "lean and mean" stance and trimmed a lot of expense out of the operating budget. At present, they are holding their own but the industry is hurting as a whole. At the same time, we Obama and the CEO of GE consulting regularly...so obviously GE is outside the "conspiracy". Also, the approval rating of Congress in general is worse that just about anything else that bears approval in this country. In fact, I think a significant part of Obama's problem is the inability to act in an effective manner as an entity...not just Obama but Bush as well. Congress has always been the gate-keeper of America's finances and of late they have failed us miserably...with some urging from Obama. If I look at Obama's situation from my eyes, this is what I wold tell him:

1. Most every two-term president gets a good footing for re-election by moving toward the center. He just missed his chance to effectively do that and show leadership at the same time. Instead he steadfast demanded not just meeting our debt obligations but with supplying him with approx. two trillion in additional spending. That did not sit well with the majority of America.

2. The first stimulus package was a "knee-jerk" reaction based on the assumption that only the government can save America from economic downfall. The thought to get the government out of the way of the private sector and let it function was tossed aside. Even George Soros predicted that the government would issue at least a 600 billion stimulus...a prediction made prior to Obama's election. Soros was one of Obama's biggest financial supporters.

3. All the secrecy and double-talk regarding Obama's qualification for office were allowed to go on and on and some aspects of it continue as he has his education records sealed. Obama's behavior in this process has caused me, as an American, to question whether our country has a viable process to qualify candidates for the Presidency...who upholds the Constitution. We should all worry about that.

4. The healthcare bill was brought into law totally outside of Obama's methodology upheld in his candidacy. It was a backroom deal engineered by Reid and Pelosi and strong-armed through on a late hour vote without debate. Now, we see that costs of the system will run over 65 billion per year (conservative estimate) and will exceed the cost of Medicare. There will be no choice. Favored exceptions are being handed out like candy and in the end about all the law will accomplish is to add further to the financial burden of American taxpayers and undermine the medical industry to a level of mediocrity over time. Here again...a "knee-jerk solution" when Medicare should have been examined more closely as a long term entity with some changes.

5. I am not going to take Obama to task on every aspect of the Gulf oil spill. I think he erred significantly in two areas....in that he did not call off the EPA in a crisis situation and relax some of the environmental pressures in lieu of the people's welfare and secondly, he used the situation to impose a moratorium of an industry which was providing a lot of jobs to that region. Thousand lost their jobs as a result and the economy of the coastal area was further depressed. Long term, he has undermined our off-coast drilling significantly.

6. Obama has invested approximately 400 billion dollars in American taxpayer money in the off-shore drilling and crude oil refining in South America. America doesn't have the money to invest and would someone please explain where the payback for America comes and when?

7. Immigration, especially the issues dealing with the security of our southern border, are being used as a political football in order to gain favor of the Hispanic vote...plain and simple. Obama has had ample opportunity and access to plenty of money to fix that issue...I am not sure he can even say that he has made any progress on it. Amazingly, here is a place where there were potentially plenty of "shovel-ready" jobs and he ignored it using border security as his lever to accomplish the dream act and gain granted citizenship status to up to 15 million illegal immigrants.

8. In his first term, Obama has grown the U.S. government by a factor of 17% and is projected to almost double the national debt to near 20 trillion by the end of his first term in office. He has circumvented Congressional oversight by appointing six-figured salary czars who employ large staffs of workers to do their bidding. In July of 2011 along, Obama's executive ordered regulation has imposed an estimated 9 billion dollars in additional regulatory costs to American businesses...a rate of almost 100 billion dollars a year. Could this be why the private sector cannot see a viable way to get up off its knees, invest some money, and create jobs in America?

9. There are more socialist and communists working in appointed positions in our nation's capitol today than there was when Joe McCarthy was looking for all of them. Coincidentally, most of them seem to just accidently be friends with Obama from his days as a community organizer. Americans don't like socialist and commies.

10. Obama's behavior as a "leader" and a shaper of consensus is severely lacking...a fact which showed brightly during the recent debt ceiling debate. His talents lie in creating division, mistrust, and chaos amidst which he generally declares an emergency, states that we are out of time, and demands his way.

Those are the top ten reasons that I would want the man out of office along with the vast majority of those on both sides of the aisle in Congress. No matter what political name or label is assigned at the present, this government is wreckless, out of control, and long since lost in its desire or intention to support the needs of America and its public. Logic and common sense are long overdue in Washington. That's my two cents as best as I can state it Sam. Thanks for your comments as well. WB


Becky 5 years ago

Wayne, you should have written that comment as a hub. It was very interesting. I have to say that it has educated me some more.


Wayne Brown profile image

Wayne Brown 5 years ago from Texas Author

@Becky...I had the same thought after I posted it. Maybe I'll look at it from a different angle and give it a go. I have one coming up called "American Reality" that you may like as well...should be up today. WB


WhatBigJohnThinks profile image

WhatBigJohnThinks 5 years ago

He was too busy worring about his pomegranate and rose bushes. DANG!!


Jason R. Manning profile image

Jason R. Manning 5 years ago from Sacramento, California

Terrific hub Wayne. Good comments to Sam as well. I think Harry, Pelosi, Biden and Kerry each take turns with “Bone Head Comment” of the week, of course each of them lost track of who was on first so they all chipped in gems last week. Talk about some Hub-nuggets. Thanks Sir.


Wayne Brown profile image

Wayne Brown 5 years ago from Texas Author

@WhatBigJohnThinks...I think he needs to be watching those things full time! WB

@Jason R. Manning...You are welcome...thank you for reading and commenting! WB

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