Hitch-hikers: Things to Never Do or Say if a Truck Driver Gives You a Ride

You do not want to make this man angry
You do not want to make this man angry | Source

Important Hitch-Hiking Tip:

Never hitch-hike standing on the highway or you could cause a traffic mishap. Stand off of the highway in a safer place.

Thank you and happy hitching.

An easy lesson

about getting along with a truck driver in the event that he stops and gives you a lift. He has, for the most part, rescued you from being soaked from the rain and waves of water that cars and trucks are throwing on you . . .so you need to engage yourself with a certain amount of self-control.

It's the right and decent thing to do. Respect your newly-found benefactor. Even if you have never shown anyone, not even a struggling beast, any respect. Now is the time you need to exercise plenty of respect for you never know when you will need another ride.

This is the face of an angry truck driver. You must have said or done something  ignorant to cause him such grief.
This is the face of an angry truck driver. You must have said or done something ignorant to cause him such grief. | Source

I've been where you are

and I am only trying to help you "in your adventure" on the road. Do not take it that I am being a smarty and telling you how to live your life, but I just felt like I needed to step-in and give you this vital list of hitch-hiker-related information called . . .

Hitch-hikers: Things to Never Do or Say if a Truck Driver Gives You a Ride

Loaded up and ready to roll.
Loaded up and ready to roll.
Rolling on to delivery time.
Rolling on to delivery time.
Never slip an empty tin can inside the truck wheels.
Never slip an empty tin can inside the truck wheels.
This trucker enjoys his work.
This trucker enjoys his work. | Source
Truckers contribute millions to our economy at large
Truckers contribute millions to our economy at large
A professional trucker always keeps his rig spotless.
A professional trucker always keeps his rig spotless.

Important Hitch-Hiking Tip:

When you get inside the trucker's cab, DO NOT SAY, "Don't worry. I am not a criminal." For when you say this, the truck drive just might tell you to STAY OUT.

Happy Hitching

THINGS YOU SHOULD NEVER SAY:

  • "Hey, bud! Move over. Let me drive this rig. I know that by my younger age, I can outdo you."
  • "When was the last time you brushed you teeth, old timer?"
  • "Do you drive with both eyes open or shut?"
  • "Care if I smoke? Well, I am going to smoke whether you like it or not."
  • "Are you gay?"
  • "I need you to give me $45.00 to gamble at the truck stop up ahead."
  • "Got any daughters of legal age? Care if I look at their pictures in your wallet?"
  • "Does your wife fool around?"

THINGS YOU SHOULD NEVER DO:

  • Drink up all of the poor trucker's coffee he has in his thermos.
  • Solicit every prostitute you see at every truck stop, but say you are asking for the trucker.
  • Play with the trucker's earlobes.
  • Grab the steering wheel and try to drive this huge vehicle.
  • Pillage the trucker's lunch bag or pail and "wolf it down" while the trucker watches.
  • Put your nasty shoes on the dashboard.
  • Turn-up his tape player or radio as loud as it will go.
  • Get on his CB radio and give the trucker's handle and real name while saying nasty things to other drivers.

THINGS YOU SHOULD REALLY DO:

  • Only talk if the trucker wants to talk.
  • Do not move about in the cab of the truck. The trucker doesn't need extra noise.
  • If you should have any loose change or cash, offer it to him for the ride.
  • Compliment the trucker on how good his rig looks.
  • Get his name and address so you can send him some cash when you get on your feet.
  • If he needs it, help the trucker by reading the map for him.
  • If you have experience, trade-out driving with this tired man.

"At this time, I offer a Heart-Felt Salute to All Truckers running the interstates in our country."

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