How I Used to Have a Great Time Confusing My Teachers

Class and teachers from circa 1900-1920

Source

This is a grade-school class (circa) 1900 - 1920

You do not need a program to tell you that this photo of sweet children who are obviously students of some school somewhere in America because of how straight they are standing. And their perfect posture is due to the strict-discipline taught by these serious-minded teachers.

Do you know how I recognized that the teachers were serious-minded right off? By their hairdo's. A sure give-away. And although I will never meet these teachers and students, I can tell you that these teachers had little or no trouble with these students.

Wardens of our federal prison system (back then) could have learned a thing or two from these teachers.

Beverly Hills High School, 1936

Source

Stereotypical art of a grade school teacher

Source

Can you see where I am going with this?

I had one good time researching the photos for this story. And I feel great now because most of the photos were way before I was born.

But I can relate to the students in the early grade-school's of America by way of having to adhere to strict discipline, and I am not in any way, diminishing the discipline that was handed-out by teachers of this timeframe, because discipline was, and still is, important.


A caring teacher was always appreciated

Source

But many times a teacher

will get caught-up in her own power and before she knows it, she has administered too much discipline to her class and therefore stifling what spirit and creative-energy that the class has to offer by a teacher who deals in moderate-doses of discipline.

I had teachers from 1964 through 1972 that were honestly, a mixture of both moderate discipline and some teachers who didn't trust me as far as they could throw me. This was an awful day to wake-up to. No wonder that I was a nervous wreck in those days, but there was no one to talk to about this. My parents worked so hard to put me through school that they didn't have any room for any more burdens, especially by those burdens that young people carry and old people never see them.

This class has this teacher's full-attention

Source

If I had been taught by teachers who looked this good, I might have made better grades

Source

Most of my teachers

were near-retirement age and should have retired before my class entered their teachings. Some of our teachers were very short-tempered and to match that trait that made us all on-edge, they were short-spoken to complete the package.

Looking back, the teachers I am referring to should have just "called it a day," and drew their pensions instead of taking out their resentment on us and we may never know why they resented my class and I.

I will give you one example. When a teacher is considered so mean that she is nick-named, "The Dragon Lady," behind her back, she needs to go home.

This teacher loves her job. You can tell by her demeanor

Source

Modern-day teacher 2014

Source

Typical teacher in 1958

Source

Quiz: Can you tell me the name of this student?

Source

This teacher would get no trouble from me

Source

You can spot a gentle-spirited teacher a mile away

Source

The All-American class

Source

Someone had to do something

about these hard-nosed teachers, and that someone was "me." Not that I am one to "toot my own horn," but I figured a little distraction or two just might cause these elderly teachers who had forgotten to smile to think more of "my" diversions, than trying to pounce on my friends and I who were just being ourselves--young people who hadn't reached the maturity level of adults.

So here are a few of the things that I did and I lovingly-call it . . .

"How I Used to Have a Great Time Confusing My Teachers"

  1. The Pencil Poke - imagine how nerve-racking the sound of a faucet dripping through the night making sleep impossible. Now imagine the sound of one pencil gently rapping on the side of a wooden desk and when the teacher would look alarmed, it would stop. This was my favorite "tool" to save my classmates from the wrath of our over-zealous teachers.
  2. Clearing Throats - one student in the front of the class and one in the back of the room taking turns clearing their throats but not at the same time. I have witnesses one of our teachers so irritated that she would try to glue her eyes on my buddy and I who were clearing our throats, but we would never look up from our work.
  3. Humming a Tune - in a low tone can drive even the most-disciplined teacher to drink. I hope not. That's what I did when we had been given an assignment to finish while in class. The tunes varied from "America," to "Jesus Loves Me." I never confessed to doing these things, but I always suspected that my humming was appreciated.
  4. Scuffling Feet Boogie - when you are a poor person, you do not have the best shoes to wear. That was me. So sometimes the sole of one of my shoes would tear loose and it would make this slapping sound if I pulled it back far enough, so when the teacher had her back to us while she wrote on the board, "Mr. Shoe," would do his thing. Some of my friends knew it was me, but they were having such a great time, they didn't think of "ratting me out."
  5. The Diverted Reaction - was another favorite thing to do to pass the time in class. I could tell when it was time to do something off-the-cuff, for our teacher, (a) Mrs. Handley, would almost split her lips from tightening them up for having to explain things twice. So when she would ask us, "Do you have any questions?" I would look at the work in my book and literally create a problem for her to explain. And since it was the beginning of the so-called "New" Math, she wasn't that up on it yet, so I had her at a direct-disadvantage and we loved to hear her stammer and mumble.
  6. Sign My Paper - I wonder why my teachers never paddled me for this one. All I did was do a few math problems and take it up to my teacher and ask her to sign it for my parents to see. What was funny was these math problems were not even in our lesson plans.
  7. Tell Us a Story - And when things got really boring, we would have someone to do some research our teacher's background, then pick-out a certain thing that she might love to talk about then ask her to tell us about that time in her life.
  8. If it Smells Like a Duck - this one took guts to do. All it involved was someone bold enough to bring a rotting egg to class and then for a handful of co-conspirators to get her attention while the student with the rotting egg to put it in the trash can that sit at the front of the class and when the heat came on in the winter time, what a smell it gave off. Sometimes the teacher would try to question us to see whom brought this disgusting item to class.
  9. Steam Goes Wild - this trick was not recommended for the feint of heart. All you needed was a seventy-five cent water pistol-small enough to fit into your hand. And at recess, you hit the boys' rest room, fill the water pistol, and when class resumed, shoot the steam pipes that ran along the edge of the classroom ceiling--sending puffs of white steam into the air. What fun.
  10. Gazing Into Eternity--what was also fun to do was sit and gaze without moving, out the window and sure enough, when the teacher's curiosity got the best of her, she would ask, "What are you gazing at?" I would reply, "Oh, ma'am, you didn't see that deer running across the grounds? Look! There it goes again." That was worth about twenty-minutes of good distraction.

Class dismissed.

Coming soon . . ."The Simplicity of Being Out of Place"

More by this Author


Comments 16 comments

wordswithlove profile image

wordswithlove 2 years ago from Pennsylvania, USA

And despite it all, you graduated! Now that is an accomplishment, Kenneth! :)


Ericdierker profile image

Ericdierker 2 years ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

We always said that if you were not raising hell you were catching it anyway.


craiglyn profile image

craiglyn 2 years ago from Ontario, Canada

Oh yes, brought back memories of my school days. The good, the bad and the ugly. I had them all - and one or two of them were nuns. LOL - both bad and good. I once got the strap in grade 1 or 2 for throwing a snowball at recess, because some kid tattled on me, and all I did was form a snowball in my mitts and then drop it to the ground. Nasty nun that was. And then there was the time that a really nasty teacher hauled me out of my chair by my ear (which was bandaged because of a coffee burn) because I turned to look at someone who was laughing in the back. She felt the rath of my Italian grandmother - another good LOL. But then I had some amazing teachers, one of them being a homeroom teacher in grade 11 or picked me up every morning (after we moved out of the area) and dropped me off every night rather than see me quit school. Thanks for the reminiscing Kenneth.


ocfireflies profile image

ocfireflies 2 years ago from North Carolina

First, I wish I looked like the pic for the 2014 "modern-day"teacher."

I am sure you and your little buddies would have driven me mad if I was not already...but I can think of a time or two when I heard a student ask a neighbor if I had "eyes in the back of my head" for I had the knack of knowing my kids and loving them all the same. And then there were times when the kids would get away with their shenanigans before I caught up with what they were doing. Trying to get me off on another topic was used on more than one occasion before I finally caught on...

Smiles,

Kim


sheilamyers 2 years ago

I never did any of these things, but always got a good laugh when other kids did. There's just something hilarious about a flustered teacher.


wordswithlove profile image

wordswithlove 2 years ago from Pennsylvania, USA

Well, I was a teacher once, briefly, but then I was in my twenties and the kids I taught were too young to play pranks on me. :)


teaches12345 profile image

teaches12345 2 years ago

As a teacher, I have come across a couple of these thoughts. We tend to also see them as humous but have to be the bad guy and keep order. Someone has to be the grown up!


kenneth avery profile image

kenneth avery 2 years ago from Hamilton, Alabama Author

Hi, teaches12345,

I know. I always tend to see the humor in things, and I am sorry if you thought that I was a rowdy student. I was. Some. But not all of the time. And you are 100% right. Someone needs to be the adult.

Thank you for your nice comment.


kenneth avery profile image

kenneth avery 2 years ago from Hamilton, Alabama Author

WordswithLove,

Hello. Where have you been for so long? I have missed you. You were a teacher? Wow. This was a great job wasn't it--molding young minds into the right ways of life.

Oh, how blessed you were that your students were not like my buddies and I in the not pranking you.

Thank you so much for your sweet comments.


kenneth avery profile image

kenneth avery 2 years ago from Hamilton, Alabama Author

Hi, sheilamyers,

Now I want to clear my slate.

I did NOT design or participate in ALL of these pranks and I agree. It was sometimes more fun to sit back and watch our teachers lose it with frustration than to actually lead in the prank.

Thanks for the nice comment. Have a safe Sunday.


kenneth avery profile image

kenneth avery 2 years ago from Hamilton, Alabama Author

Hi, Kim aka/ocfireflies,

I think that YOU DO look like the modern-day teacher of 2014. Thank you for stopping by for a comment.

You be careful out there when travelling through Hubville.


kenneth avery profile image

kenneth avery 2 years ago from Hamilton, Alabama Author

eric . . .

And I cannot argue with a friend who tells the truth. And your comment IS the whole, unvarnished truth.

Thank you, good friend. Sincerely.


kenneth avery profile image

kenneth avery 2 years ago from Hamilton, Alabama Author

@ WordswithLove, again,

Now you have really hit it on the head. I never even thought of this ever in my life outside of school.

Thanks for the sweet confirmation. And God is good and merciful.

Me graduating is one of His finest miracles.

Come back anytime to visit.


kenneth avery profile image

kenneth avery 2 years ago from Hamilton, Alabama Author

Dear craiglyn,

I have to be honest. Normally, I look for the humor in comments and while I really enjoyed your comment, part of it made me very sad. The part about the teacher hurting your injured ear. May I? What a low llife! I say this due to the fact that I sense that you are too much of a lady to say this, but I am NOT a lady. I tell the truth.

I faced teachers like this. And one believed in the Humiliation Factor to teach unruly kids lessons such as taping a paper tongue to their chins for talking in class like all kids will do.

I know of one girl a jerk of a teacher did this way, and today, she has some inner problems that she said later, stemmed from the embarrassment this "teacher" caused her.

Oh, thank God for your Italian grandmother! Wish I could have met her and shook her hand for taking up for you.

And I am proud of the good teachers you had.

I am a bit sorry for getting irate, but when friends get hurt or tell of a hurt, it touches me.

Okay?

Thanks for stopping in.


wordswithlove profile image

wordswithlove 2 years ago from Pennsylvania, USA

Hello Kenneth, I have been gone for a while. I unpublished all my hubs and intend to start again....one day, in the future. I now just come by to read!


kenneth avery profile image

kenneth avery 2 years ago from Hamilton, Alabama Author

My Dear wordswithlove,

Why did you unpublish your hubs? Oh, I see. You intend to start again. Great. I do not want to lose a wonderful friend and follower as well as a very talented writer.

I look forward to you reading this hub and all of my current hubs.

I appreciate you very much.

    Sign in or sign up and post using a HubPages Network account.

    0 of 8192 characters used
    Post Comment

    No HTML is allowed in comments, but URLs will be hyperlinked. Comments are not for promoting your articles or other sites.


    Click to Rate This Article
    working