Joe the Plumber for President

We All Care About Joe

Joe the Plumber doesn't want to pay more taxes, and he doesn't want you to pay more taxes, either! In fact, he doesn't want ANYBODY to pay more taxes. In fact, he is going to give you money. How could you even think of voting for those other two? Are you nuts?

Why Joe?

Who better than a plumber to unclog a stopped up economy? Who better than a plumber to get the cash flow flowing again? Who better than a plumber to relieve the pressure our health care system is putting on our society? Who better to solder together the widening divisions we see in our society?

Yes, friends, Joe represents the common people. What does he know? He knows what I know! Not much! Just like you and me! So when we elect Joe to be the next President of the United States, it will be just like we elected ourselves. And who better to represent our interests then us?

And Joe's not stupid, either. He knows that in order to make it in this country you can't just be a plumber. You've got to go into business before you start to make any money. And that is what America is all about, too. Pushing the the envelope until you push your way right the heck out of there.

Of course, when Joe starts his business, he won't exactly be the same guy. He'll still be Joe the Plumber all right, but he won't be Joe the Plumber working for the Acme Plumbing Company anymore. Nope, he'll have to quit that job because he won't be able to make any real money until he's his own boss. Why not? you might very well ask if I poke you hard enough. Well, I'll tell you. Because his boss takes a little bit of money that could go into employee pay and benefits and instead invests it back into the company or takes it for himself, because he's the boss, the greedy so-and-so! So what will Joe do when he's the boss? Why, he'll do the same thing, of course! So in effect, Joe will BECOME his boss. And just in time for Hallowe'en, too.

Vote for Joe!

So remember, a vote for Joe is a vote for you! This is a great thing! Here you've been grumbling all these years about what you would do if you were president and now - shazam! Here's your chance! Joe already represents us in the media and in the minds of both major presidential candidates. He may as well represent us as President of the United States. So, come election day, remember to write in Joe the Plumber for President.

While you're at it, write in John McCain for Vice President. I've got a feeling Joe will be glad to have someone with lots and lots and lots of experience around to help him out.

I guess that would make John McCain a plumber's helper, wouldn't it?

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Comments 23 comments

R. Martin Basso profile image

R. Martin Basso 8 years ago from California

I laughed and laughed a this concept.  well done. you sire a re being added to my favorites and I am now a fan!

HA!


Tom Rubenoff profile image

Tom Rubenoff 8 years ago from United States Author

Ya gotta laugh, these days.


funnebone profile image

funnebone 8 years ago from Philadelphia Pa

I wouldn't be shocked if joe ran for a local office soon.


Tom Rubenoff profile image

Tom Rubenoff 8 years ago from United States Author

Hey, if Jesse "The Body" Ventura could be governor of Minnesota, why not Joe "The Plumber" Wurzelbacher for president?


Amanda Severn profile image

Amanda Severn 8 years ago from UK

I think I must be missing something here. My nine year old came in to the kitchen this morning after watching the breakfast news, and he said to me 'Mum, if Barack Obama gets in as President he's going to raise taxes, but if you're a plumber, you don't want to be paying more taxes!' This is quite intellectual stuff coming from my boy. Usually his conversation revolves around Star Wars and Pokemon! We're in the UK so we obviously don't see all your news, but it sounds as though there's been a news item that I've obviously missed. Can anybody fill me in?


Constant Walker profile image

Constant Walker 8 years ago from Springfield, Oregon

Joe the Plumber... Sarah the Gun-Toting Christian... Really, what's the difference?


sschilke profile image

sschilke 8 years ago

Tom,

Why not? Joe the Plummer for President, it's not totally unreasonable. There have been worse choices.

sschilke


Constant Walker profile image

Constant Walker 8 years ago from Springfield, Oregon

Really. And Joe isn't a "politician" so he would definitely be a good president.


Tom Rubenoff profile image

Tom Rubenoff 8 years ago from United States Author

I think Joe would be as good a president as anyone. Do you think he is related to Joe Sixpack?


Amanda Severn profile image

Amanda Severn 8 years ago from UK

Hi Tom, I finally caught up with the story! And yes, I think I'd prefer Joe the plumber to Joe Six-Pack, He's probably got more of a clue about what's round the next s-bend, and how to avoid it!


Tom Rubenoff profile image

Tom Rubenoff 8 years ago from United States Author

And probably best at navigating the cesspool of Washington, too!


Shadesbreath profile image

Shadesbreath 8 years ago from California

They had an expose on Joe on the news last night. From the looks of it, he was just trying to muddle Obama up. Turns out he's in debt and not really in a position to be buying the business he made it sound like he was about to buy. I mean, I'm all for rattling politicians if you can, but, the "Joe the Plumber" they were speaking to in the debates is an idealized guy. The real guy seems about a sharp as the corners on a marshmallow.


Tom Rubenoff profile image

Tom Rubenoff 8 years ago from United States Author

Ya, Joe is already turning out to be a disappointment, or politician. Those are synonyms, aren't they?


countrywomen profile image

countrywomen 8 years ago from Washington, USA

Amanda,

I guess as far as raising the tax part is concerned which was raised by your son: It could be due to the fact that both candidates assuring that "Joe the plumber's" taxes wouldn't be raised. Of course Barak's plan if the person earns more than 250,000 $ than taxes would be higher (but not many plumber maybe making that kind of money or maybe the best plumbers do... I don't know exactly) If they do then I guess in the top careers plumbing should also be listed...


Tom Rubenoff profile image

Tom Rubenoff 8 years ago from United States Author

I am not altogether certain that Mr. Obama completely understands his tax plan. I believe that both candidates mentioned something about incentives for small business to create jobs, which I think is a good idea.

Plumbers in my area charge about 60 an hour per plumber, 2-plumber minimum, 1 hour minimum charge. At that rate, a two-person company billing out 8 hours a day, five days a week for a year would gross $240,000. Add to that a reasonable profit on materials and you could see a gross income around a half a million. Deduct gasoline, insurances, employee salary, workmans compensation, licensing, building permits, rent, equipment, tools, state and local fees and taxes, you get the picture. In the old days I had a locksmith business. I think grossed around $150K in order to take home $60K. I would be interested in finding out what the margin is on plumbing work, but Google is too clogged w/ Joe to dig anything up.


countrywomen profile image

countrywomen 8 years ago from Washington, USA

Tom,

Good analysis. I have some questions.... Does Barak's plan raise taxes on Gross Sales or Net profit? Do plumber's have their hands full 40 hours per week for 52 weeks? Is the net profit only about 1/3rd of the sales? I guess if the tax is on gross sales of quarter million it maynot be fair then....


Tom Rubenoff profile image

Tom Rubenoff 8 years ago from United States Author

The wording on his web site is unclear, but as I heard it he said that he will give a tax cut to individuals making less than $250K, and no tax cut to individuals making more than that.  For a sole proprietor, net profit is the same as gross individual income for a working stiff like me. 

The plumbers I have known are extremely hard working and charge extra for after hours emergencies and weekends.   As a former business owner, I know that the key to survival is "self exploitation." 

I would like to know the profit margin of plumbers - it would make it easier to haggle with them - but I do not.  I suspect when Joe gets less interesting it will be possible to get a better idea through internet research.  Probably that info is available from the U.S. Census web site. 

On the web site, the main tax increase discussed is the windfall profits tax aimed at the "excessive" profits of large oil companies. While oil company profits are large - billions and billions - they only work at a margin of around nine percent, if my facts are correct.


Kika Rose profile image

Kika Rose 8 years ago from Minnesota

Joe the Plumber sure came up alot in the last debate, and this hub just made me laugh from it. xD

Tom, you have a great sense of humor. This hub is perfect, especially with elections coming up so quickly. Thank you for making me smile! ^_^


Tom Rubenoff profile image

Tom Rubenoff 8 years ago from United States Author

Smiling is definitely as good for the soul as it is for the face.

:0)


Sally's Trove profile image

Sally's Trove 8 years ago from Southeastern Pennsylvania

Great Hub! My financial advisor called me the other night and asked if I would write in Joe the Plumber for president. I took her meaning quite seriously. Joe might be the better choice than the two we are faced with.

But regarding Joe's current or potential income, and how his business may be affected by Obama's platform, that's up to Joe to structure his business as a sole proprietorship or as a partnership or corporation. He needs a tax advisor.

Benefitting from the 250,000 ceiling for earning tax benefits under Obama's plan depends on many factors.

But Joe sure won our hearts, didn't he?

Great Hub!


Candace Morgan profile image

Candace Morgan 8 years ago from New York

Great. Thanks.


plumbers chicago 4 years ago

Joe the Plumber explained Obama's flawed economic plan in three sentences where both Obama and Biden can't explain it at all. And Joe the Plumber connects with working Americans where the Harvard Democrat elitists can't. I think we should all write in Joe the Plumber on the ballot and send the Democrat Party a message.

http://chicago-plumbers.us/


Tom Rubenoff profile image

Tom Rubenoff 4 years ago from United States Author

You know you were doing great until you used the phrase "Harvard Democrat elitist." What about that closet Massachusetts Socialist Republican? Where's equal time, pal? And where did Richie Mitt go to school, anyway? Community college?

Anyway, every American should vote. No American should try to keep anyone else from voting. And go ahead and vote in good old Joe if you want. Whatever you decide, let your voice be heard.

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