I am Not a Modern-Day Adam

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Explosion of courage

Walking around in the nude, and living in the nude has its drawbacks for a man in 2015. And so it is with the woman in the same situation. I never fully-realized this obviously-awkward way of living until recently although I was taught about Adam and Eve at youth.

At some times in my young life when I was eager to learn more about this famous Biblical duo, that for a young male dealing with puberty, (a male's serpent. Now think about that), it was really exciting to look at Eve without any stitch of clothing without receiving a fiery scolding from my mom. To her it appeared that my interest in Eve was the first step in my learning about Biblical times.

Adam and Eve
Adam and Eve
Adam and Eve in Paradise
Adam and Eve in Paradise

I was drawn to Eve

I was never that interested in Adam. No offense, God. I just wasn't wired to admire a nude man and for that matter, I still don't.

That goes double for Satan who was also in The Garden of Eden, but a talking snake? I know that if Satan, in the form of a snake, could talk, only God could pull that off, but in day-to-day life in Eden, I am still in a cloud of not understanding.

For me, living nude in a fast-paced, laser-tech society would be very impractical even if it were not illegal. Some think being nude is liberating. And it is to a point. But allow me one example. Let's say that on my day off I plan on enjoying myself just loafing around in the city park. Then, what a wonderful surprise. A pretty girl introduces herself to me and she never loses eye contact with me. I am visibly-moved by her statuesque demeanor.

"Let's sit down and talk," she says in such a nice voice.

Eve in the Garden of Eden
Eve in the Garden of Eden

What a mistake

I agree smiling as I bend over to find a nice spot of grass, but as soon as my behind hits the grass, I have mischosen a safe location in which to sit. I didn't notice the rag weeds growing and this plant's leaves scratch my tender skin and makes me squirm and scratch while the pretty young lady is probably entertained by my constant-moving. Finally I find a soft place for my butt. I smile with happiness.

"Nice welts. Red and swelled," she comments.

"Well, I tell you this," I respond. "If I had been wearing my jeans, this would have never happened."

This was just one of my own inconveniences of living in the nude. I told you I was taking a day off from my work. Well, my coworkers in my office at first were shocked at my nudity. But over time, the vulgar jokes and sexual enuendoes stopped. My boss explained that it was policy for employees to wear at least (one) article of clothing, so to skirt-by that problem, I just wear my Florsheim's and look natural.

The Creation
The Creation

Other adversarial areas

Ordering meat selections from my butcher, keeping a doctor's appointment are two more areas where I experience annoyance with living nude. Although most of these people have already seen me nude, they laugh like crazed mules each time I swagger inside their offices to do business with them.

I did want to comment about Eve before I finish this touchy essay. For me as a nude man in 2015, I would find it very difficult to ask a woman of Eve's station in life out for coffee. But in all honesty, she and I are both nude, so I will not experience self-consciousness. But Eve was personally crafted by God, our Creator and I would be so in awe of her perfect features, my nerves would eat me alive.

I have though found two benefits of living nude: I get to help pretty girls in peril in the bit city. True. When it rains, taxi drivers will not pick them up. What a selfish breed of men. But when I step off of the sidewalk in the nude and signal them to stop, although they stop out of curiosity, they do stop and each pretty girl in peril appreciates my gesture.

The other benefit is that I save a ton on buying clothes and washing powders.

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Comments 17 comments

Randy Godwin profile image

Randy Godwin 20 months ago from Southern Georgia

If God wanted us to go around naked Ken, we'd have been born with no clothes on. Whew!! I was afraid you'd have some naked "selfies" on this hub. :o

Seriously Ken, you must have done some real research on this hub. :P


Barbara Kay profile image

Barbara Kay 20 months ago from USA

LOL, but it was funny that I was thinking about this same thing this morning. Don't ask me why, but I was. I was thinking in terms more of how our clothing protects us and how uncomfortable it would be weeding the garden etc. What if you sat on a thistle or sat on a seat where someone not so clean sat! Ugh! In nudist colonies they have to sit on towels.

I'm happy not worrying about it. Besides, I like clothes.


gmwilliams profile image

gmwilliams 20 months ago from the Greatest City In The World-New York City, New York

What a good sartorial synopsis. Being nude can be QUITE a RISKY venture. It takes boldness, even daring. Great story as usual.


MizBejabbers profile image

MizBejabbers 20 months ago

It's risky all right. You would have to forego black vinyl seats in cars, especially convertibles. Thanks, but I'll keep my clothes on. Heck, I enjoy finding bargains in pretty clothes. After all, what's money for, to keep in a room and play in it like Scrooge McDuck, but in the nude. Now that could get cold on body parts, you funny man.


The0NatureBoy profile image

The0NatureBoy 20 months ago from Washington DC

Kenneth, my friend,

Adam and Eve were nacked but not nude, they didn't become nude until they were made "coats of skin" by the hair being removed from their bodies upon leaving the garden.

Before I explain the fact relative to the story I want to point out that every boy and every girl are Adam or man per Genesis 1:26-29 & Genesis 5:1-2, our genders are bolys and girls and any Adam/man offspring is called a man-child (Revelation 12:5). In that light you, and everyone of our specie, are both Adam of the 20th century, there'd are few "Genesis 1" man if any anymore. The Aboriginals of Australia took an oath of celibacy to die off -- they must live in civilization to determine if they are to be "Jews [chosen] to Israel [endure]" civilization's end (Matthew 24:13). Remember, "the unseen can be understood by the things made" (Romans 1:20) and there are sightings of big hair man.

The Hebrew word, עירום, translated to English means both naked and nude but they were not ashamed of their bodies because before being evicted from the garden they were as hairy an any other animal (Daniel 4:33). It was their being made "cows of skin" was he removal of that hair. If you have noticed there were no children until leaving the garden which suggests their nakedness was their not knowing how to mate with a hairy foreskin. An erected boy's penis doesn't extend out of the foreskin like other animals and Eve would not allow him to use the hair in mating, so they were naked rather than nude.

Once the hair was removed they could mate with the hairless foreskin so they began to have children. Whenever the Bible say some boy "knew" a girl it talks about mating during her ovulation for at no other time does a girl conceive. Once naked, of hair, their playing wit heath other created a sexual desire at times other than during ovulation so they mated at will is why the Bible states "he knew his wife."


kenneth avery profile image

kenneth avery 20 months ago from Hamilton, Alabama Author

Hi, The0NatureBoy,

Thank you for the very interesting and deep comment. I always get a new nugget of wisdom from your comments.

So according to Hebrew, there is a difference between nude and naked. Okay. That is so interesting.

I admire your I.Q. and points of study.

Your friend, Kenneth


kenneth avery profile image

kenneth avery 20 months ago from Hamilton, Alabama Author

Randy,

Thank you for your humorous comment. And no, not for you to worry about Me downloading videos of this subject. That was a perfect line.

And the only research I did was just sit and live the imaginary trip down the halls of society 2015 without clothes.

Awful!


kenneth avery profile image

kenneth avery 20 months ago from Hamilton, Alabama Author

Hey, gmwilliams,

Thanks for your nice and uplifting comment. It made me feel good.

And yes, it would be quite the venture and a source of a lot of attention.

I am not about to try this.

Come back anytime.


kenneth avery profile image

kenneth avery 20 months ago from Hamilton, Alabama Author

MizbeJabbers,

Gardening? Oh, my. I never thought of this area. Or weedeating. Sheesh. I want to stop thinking of this subject. Now Tom Green of MTV, the street prank comic genius would love to do a skit on film about a man going to his family reunion without clothes. And keeping a poker face.

Thank you, MizbeJabbers for being my friend and dear follower.

Come back anytime.


kenneth avery profile image

kenneth avery 20 months ago from Hamilton, Alabama Author

Hey, Barbara,

I feel as if I need to apologize to you for planting this topic in your thinking as you were getting ready this morning. I am sorry.

I admit that "I" would not do this personally, but the comedy bits of this are almost limitless.

But I won't list them here.

Thanks again, Barbara for the visit and come back again.


The0NatureBoy profile image

The0NatureBoy 20 months ago from Washington DC

No, not according to Hebrew but English, in Hebrew the same word is translated to nude and naked. In English nude is relative to having one's body covered but nakedness means "ignorance" or not knowing. What Adam didn't know was how to mate with the hairy foreskin, because of smelling her ovulation called "heat"in other animals, and was to embarrassed to ask the voice since he was standing there erected and not knowing what to do. That's why they covered themselves.

Your friend,

Elijah


MizBejabbers profile image

MizBejabbers 20 months ago

I was already having a good laughing day exchanging childhood jokes with a friend, but Elijah's explanation of naked and nude just capped it off. Hilarious, man.


The0NatureBoy profile image

The0NatureBoy 20 months ago from Washington DC

Thanks, MizB.


kenneth avery profile image

kenneth avery 20 months ago from Hamilton, Alabama Author

The0NatureBoy,

What some profound diggings in your comment. I am with MizBejabbers about nude and naked. Very interesting indeed. In Adam's view, I can see how he as well as Eve would have a tough time doing something they had never done before.

Very deep, my friend. Very deep.

Thanks for such educational comments.

Peace.


kenneth avery profile image

kenneth avery 20 months ago from Hamilton, Alabama Author

MizBejabbers,

Thank you too for your funny comment. And The0NatureBoy, my thanks to you also for putting a smile on my face.

You both have a safe weekend.

Kenneth


The0NatureBoy profile image

The0NatureBoy 20 months ago from Washington DC

Thanks you, Kenneth, one does not reason things out to keep it to themselves, they do it to assist others finding understanding where there was previously none.

MizBejabbers, I was always amazed at how stupid I had been every time some new revelation came to me, they always made me smile.

Thanks to both of you,

Elijah "the0natureboy"


The0NatureBoy profile image

The0NatureBoy 20 months ago from Washington DC

By the way, I failed to explain the talking serpent.

If you recall Yoshua's (called Jesus) words in Matthew 10:16, "… be ye therefore wise as serpents, and harmless as doves," you should realize he is saying serpents represents wisdom rather than evil, although to the world it's the power to destroy the world's beliefs and why it's considered evil by worldly minds. Also, in Isaiah 5:20 we find "Woe unto them that call evil good, and good evil; that put darkness for light, and light for darkness; that put bitter for sweet, and sweet for bitter" which is the way of the world.

Thus, the serpent was the messenger whose responsibility was to show Eve the opposites and instead of her seeking understanding she chose to like half of each category and hate the other which has become good/evil, bitter/sweet, pretty/ugly positive/negative and the like. That was the purpose of the "flaming sword," the fire to purify their minds of good and evil and the sword to cut us away fro all attachments before obtaining everlasting life.

Peace,

Elijah

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