Political Correctness for Dummies

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Tevya Brings the Bagels

Good Morning, Breakfastpoppers. Today is Monday, August 31, 2015. Our dear friend, Wasp Tevya, is at the breakfast table this morning. Tevya is here to educate us on the proper way to speak in the year 2015. What was once acceptable is now banned, and it is imperative that we all catch up with this strange new world we are living in. Tevya has brought us an astonishing assortment of bagels this morning. We have every type of topping to accommodate everyone's different tastes. Please join us and bring a notebook and pencil. We have a entirely new vocabulary to absorb. We hope to see you soon.

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A Few No-Nos

Thank you all for joining me this morning. If any of you are considering attending the University of New Hampshire, please be aware that certain words are no longer allowed on campus. First on the list is the word "American." For those among you who are curious about just why "American" is a no-no, consider the fact that America is not the only country on earth. What if someone in the seat next to you in class is from Mexico? Hearing the term "American" would be extremely offensive. It is better to describe yourself as a resident of America. You get the idea, right? Now you have been reduced to just another insignificant member of the world. Surely, you understand, don't you? Moving along, let's remove the word "foreigner" from the dictionary. Apparently, "foreigner" is a chauvinistic term, so take your eraser and get rid of it. The same is true of "homosexual" and "illegal alien. I'm not sure, but I think it is okay to refer to an 'Illegal alien" as a resident of Mexico. Forget about the term "mothering" and "fathering". In today's world a father could actually be a mother and visa versa.

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XE?

Schools in Vancouver, Canada have abandoned the words "he" and "she" in favor of the more politically correct "xe." At first glance, the word is unpronounceable, but fear not , just say "ze." In order to be perfectly politically correct, replace "them" with "xem. "In case you didn't get the memo, boys and girls are exactly the same. You need to understand that referring to a male as a boy might be problematic if he identifies with the female sex. Play it safe and don't identify anybody. As an added plus, the schools in Vancouver are leaving it up to the students to decide what toilet facility they want to use. One day a kid might feel like a boy, another day, a girl. Using the right bathroom becomes important under such circumstances.

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Some More Banned Words

The list of banned words is getting quite extensive. Getting it correct in today's world is going to require constant study and practice. The next time you are tempted to refer to somebody as a "gossip", hold your tongue. Xe is actually, a "transmitter of near factual information." A "natural disaster" should be referred to as a "global warming experience." A "lazy person" is really just "motivationally deficient", a "jailer" is a "custodial artist", a"fat person" is "horizontally challenged" and a "drunk person" is "chemically inconvenienced." From now on no one is "ugly." Instead the formerly ugly Xe is just "cosmetically different." Political correctness is hard work. It is imperative to get up to speed lest you insult somebody who will then contact either the ACLU, the Westboro Baptist Church, PETA, the Justice Department or Black Lives Matter. It's dangerous out there, so pay attention and think before you speak. Better yet, don't speak at all!

Tevya's Song

Dear God (am I allowed to say that?)

You made so many intellectually challenged people

It's no shame to be intellectually challenged

But it's no great honor either!

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Comments 63 comments

gmwilliams profile image

gmwilliams 13 months ago from the Greatest City In The World-New York City, New York

Yes, the grown ups have gone.....vanished to be replaced by whiny immature brats. Oversensitivity has gone to a new level. One has to be so careful what h/she says lest h/she hurts someone's wittle feelings, boo hoo. The idea of being tough and able to handle situations and say it as it is has been replaced by avoiding the more harsher aspects of life because it will "damage" one. Also life is always be rosy and good. Well, the real world isn't that way. Well, America is what it is now because as children they have been so mollycoddled and pampered that they have developed an entitlement mentality. Also, people do not want to say certain words because they seem "discriminatory" when in fact, they aren't. We are now living in a nation of whiny babies.


Jayfort 13 months ago

And I find myself having to explain the difference between the "Melting Pot" concept and "Multiculturalism" to these folks who seem to thing they are the same thing. Good grief! What has happened to this country?!?!?!


Old Poolman profile image

Old Poolman 13 months ago from Rural Arizona

Good Morning Patti - I fear I am too old to learn a whole new language so I will most likely be in violation of the new rules on a daily basis. gmwilliams has it right, the nation has been taken over by whiny babies.

The only good part is they will have to live the rest of their lives in this new culture that they created. They may live to regret many of the PC changes they have made.


breakfastpop profile image

breakfastpop 13 months ago Author

Good Morning gmwilliams,

Boo Hoo is right on! With each passing day we are being dumbed down to a level once thought unthinkable. If I had to have a so-called politically correct conversation, I would fail miserably. I would also be proud of such a failure. See you at the Inn.


breakfastpop profile image

breakfastpop 13 months ago Author

Good Morning Jayfort,

Our country has been hijacked by the new left who can't think their way out of a paper bag! See you at the Inn.


breakfastpop profile image

breakfastpop 13 months ago Author

Good Morning, Mike,

Having to navigate the polluted politically correct waters is punishment enough for those who subscribe to it. For people like us, it is cruel and unusual. It's a good thing I have decided not to participate! See you at the Inn.


taxlarry 13 months ago

This is the dumbing down of America.....North America.


breakfastpop profile image

breakfastpop 13 months ago Author

Good Morning taxlarry,

You are no longer allowed to use the expression, "dumbing down." First of all, it offends people who are actually dumb and the use of the word "down" offends people who are depressed. It would be better to say that this is the "dismantling of the intellectual mind." See you at the Inn and please feel free to use any bathroom you want.


Old Poolman profile image

Old Poolman 13 months ago from Rural Arizona

Sadly, the whiny babies actually believe they are making this country a better place to live. Can you even imagine the culture shock they will experience when they visit other countries that don't believe in Political Correctness? Some of them may even end up in Mental Institutions.

Oh wait, I believe we closed all of those and turned the inmates out onto the streets didn't we?


Tom Whitworth profile image

Tom Whitworth 13 months ago from Moundsville, WV

Pop and Tevya,

I can remember a few years back wondering what ever happened to the descriptive term oriental. I always thought of words like mysterious, inscrutable and other things I considered positive. Imagine my surprise when I found that oriental had been banned as racist. WOW.


gmwilliams profile image

gmwilliams 13 months ago from the Greatest City In The World-New York City, New York

Old Poolman, a mental institution will do the whiny ones good. Better yet, a swift kick in the you-know-what would be so much better!


breakfastpop profile image

breakfastpop 13 months ago Author

Dear Mike,

First of all if mental institutions existed anymore, they would be facilities for those that find life too challenging. Second of all, I think we should build more of these facilities to accommodate all the fools that think they are on the right track.


breakfastpop profile image

breakfastpop 13 months ago Author

Good Morning Tom,

I use that term a lot and i too found out that I am not supposed to. I'll never get these things right and that is just fine with me! See you at the Inn, no XEs allowed!


breakfastpop profile image

breakfastpop 13 months ago Author

Dear gm,

I agree!!!!!!!


billybuc profile image

billybuc 13 months ago from Olympia, WA

Mark this day on your calendar....we are in complete agreement. :)


breakfastpop profile image

breakfastpop 13 months ago Author

Good Morning billy,

I think this is the third time we were simpatico! See you at the Inn.


savvydating profile image

savvydating 13 months ago

Xe? Are you kidding me? I could just see myself going around saying that. Ha! For crying out loud. How do you even put it in a sentence? Do you say, "Hi Xe" Or, "The class is full of Xem....?"

Things are getting too weird for me.


bradmasterOCcal profile image

bradmasterOCcal 13 months ago from Orange County California

BP

What is really Dumb are the people that believe they have to follow this trend.

And really dumb people wouldn't know that dumbing down was referring to them. After all they are dumb, and if they did know it was referring to them, then they would be smart.

Don't come to America if you are offended in finding it full of Americans.

If there is no difference between male and female then why do we have separate public restrooms for them?

Ask not for whom the Bell Tolls, it tolls for xe and the rest of xem.but not for Yew, or Mew.

This doesn't chill the 1st Amendment Freedom of Speech, it makes it a Popsicle of Pathetic ProNouns. It makes the American Concept of FreeDom into FreeDumb.

Let us throw away the dictionaries, and just randomly concatenate random letters of the Alphabet. They don't even have to be our Alphabet. It doesn't mean anything because these new words have no meaning. What they do have is an arrogance and a disrespect for the US Constitution.

Don't look for the Jelly Donuts at the Inn, they are with me. But none of them will make it out alive. :(


izettl profile image

izettl 13 months ago from The Great Northwest

Oh BreakfastPop, how I've missed you! It's been a while since I've done much on hubpages. I have my own site now...kind of going for the advice columnist thing/blog thing. http://honestlylaura.com/index.html

Anyway, I love how you approach a subject. Always have and this is great stuff. I'm not sure I could write about this topic in a non-offensive way, but you have done it justice and a fine job! I just read an article in The Atlantic magazine about this topic. ("The Coddling of The American Mind").

Cheers

Izettl


Big E 13 months ago

Let me let you in on a little secret. You don't have to watch what you say nearly as much if you are black. It would be awesome to be a black man in america today.


Old Poolman profile image

Old Poolman 13 months ago from Rural Arizona

I have to ask who in their right mind would even go along with these rules? What the heck would they do if you refused to follow something this stupid?


fpherj48 profile image

fpherj48 13 months ago from Beautiful Upstate New York

LMAO!!! Oh pop...you are Soooo funny. I laughed so hard...you are quite the comedian!! You...........what??!! You mean, you didn't make this up? This is a not an intentionally FUNNY hub that you created by using your loony imagination? HUH???

This is all for real? This is not a transmission of near factual information?

Oh dear.


breakfastpop profile image

breakfastpop 13 months ago Author

Dear savvy dating,

Actually, you are right on point That is exactly what is required now. How does Costa Rica sound to you I hear thongs are still normal there. I'll wait for you at the Inn. There are no Xes there.


breakfastpop profile image

breakfastpop 13 months ago Author

Dear brad,

Clearly, you understand the new lingo better than the average bear. Understanding this garbage and believing in it are two entirely different things. You and I don't plan on conforming and I like that. See you at the Inn.


breakfastpop profile image

breakfastpop 13 months ago Author

Dear Izetti,

How wonderful it is to see you at the breakfast table. I've missed you. I will most certainly check out your blog. See you at the Inn. We really need to catch up.


breakfastpop profile image

breakfastpop 13 months ago Author

Dear Big E,

You have a point.


breakfastpop profile image

breakfastpop 13 months ago Author

Dear Mike,

Perhaps if we refused to submit to this insanity we would be sent to GITMO!


breakfastpop profile image

breakfastpop 13 months ago Author

Dear fp,

Get prepared for the new norm. I'll see you at GITMO when the PC Police round us up! Forget the Inn.


Old Poolman profile image

Old Poolman 13 months ago from Rural Arizona

Well at least we built them a very nice soccer field at GITMO. Perhaps we will be able to stand in the "free speech zone" and talk normally while we watch the terrorists play soccer.


breakfastpop profile image

breakfastpop 13 months ago Author

Dear Mke,

Okay, I'll pack some hotdogs and fries!


FitnezzJim profile image

FitnezzJim 13 months ago from Fredericksburg, Virginia

How many men out there would get threatened with being fired if they used the women's bathroom at work?


lambservant profile image

lambservant 13 months ago from Pacific Northwest

Good grief! You must change your HP moniker now too! There are two other meals- lunch and dinner, or supper, plus dessert and snack! How offensive of you to be so specific! Think of all those people in the world who don't do breakfast! This is blatant bigotry! I must report you to the HP political correctness review board! Once again, good grief!!!


WillStarr profile image

WillStarr 13 months ago from Phoenix, Arizona

I'm a red-blooded American man, married to a Latina woman born in Mexico of American parents. I'm a he, and she is definitely a she. I'll say whatever the hell I want, and so can you. No one is ever going to shut me up.

Have a nice day.


fpherj48 profile image

fpherj48 13 months ago from Beautiful Upstate New York

Will....APPLAUSE!!! BRAVO!!! YA HOO!.....KUDOS......100% CORRECT. 100% agreement!

I never bought into that PC CRAP from day one....never will. I will speak as I have spoken my entire life.....using the same verbiage I was taught and raised using.....the words & terms that educated me, introduced me to my careers, comforted me and helped through everyday life.

I will speak in the manner I choose to whom I please, using the common sense, manners, and social skills I have always used. I will NOT walk on egg shells in my own country, skirting around vital issues that need to be addressed.....people who need to HEAR and words that MUST be said. I AM,~ have always been and will always be a free American entitled to my rights according to the Constitution of the USA. If you cannot tolerate what you hear.....train your listening skills, develop a spine, face reality, accept the truth and deal with HONESTY. Wake up, Shape up, grow up and step up to the plate. Be a man or a woman of substance. Give respect to receive it....Work to earn...Play to laugh....and LOVE to have the good life. Say what you mean and Mean what you say.

Stop your whining, your tantrums and your cowardice. !!!


WillStarr profile image

WillStarr 12 months ago from Phoenix, Arizona

Political correctness has but one goal and that is to silence opposition to progressivism by intimidation. One university professor told students that they would fail the class if they used 'derogatory' words like 'man' or 'woman'.

Progressives also claim the sole right to determine what is and what is not acceptable speech. For instance, whites (AKA: gringos) cannot use the term 'wetback' (which refers to swimming a river to come here illegally), but Latinos can and do use it on each other all the time with PC blessings, because it's their 'culture'.

My question is why the hell we are putting up with this crap? Why are we allowing these twits to dictate what we can say?

Tell them to go to hell. Tell them today.


Old Poolman profile image

Old Poolman 12 months ago from Rural Arizona

As usual WillStarr is 100% correct with this. They can talk however they want among themselves, just leave the rest of us alone.


drbj profile image

drbj 12 months ago from south Florida

Your comedic but tragically true hub made me realize, bp, we have finally navigated the Looking Glass and are now living in the land of Wonderland where NOTHING makes sense.


breakfastpop profile image

breakfastpop 12 months ago Author

Dear FitnezzJime,

They ought to be worried about the women pulling them to pieces! See you at the Inn. We do have separate bathrooms there unless the PC Police changed them to unisex.


breakfastpop profile image

breakfastpop 12 months ago Author

Dear lamb servant,

I know you are right. I also have to consider the feelings of those who shun bagels,or breakfast pizzas. Others may despise Bloody Marys and want to report me to AA. It is a minefield out there. I'll see you at the Inn. At least at the Inn we can be normal and call a he she and a she a she.


breakfastpop profile image

breakfastpop 12 months ago Author

Dear Will,

That is exactly what I expected you to say. All I can say is Bravo! See you at the Inn. Let's celebrate being politically incorrect.


breakfastpop profile image

breakfastpop 12 months ago Author

Dear fp,

You are woman, hear you roar! I love what you said and I applaud how you said it. I think the root of all this garbage is stupidity, and it is pretty damn scary. See you at the Inn.


breakfastpop profile image

breakfastpop 12 months ago Author

Dear Will,

The road out there is so filled with PC potholes that just getting through a day without offending some idiot is getting harder and harder. America is finally dumbed down enough to accept all this insanity. I'll never accept it.


breakfastpop profile image

breakfastpop 12 months ago Author

Dear Mike,

Amen!


breakfastpop profile image

breakfastpop 12 months ago Author

Dear dr,

When I read your hubs about insane laws in some of our states, I begin to realize that way too many people have been entirely too crazy for a very, very long time. I'll meet you at the Inn where we are free to say whatever we want.


Jayfort 12 months ago

WillStar is on target! Political Correctness is just a means for the Liberal/Progressives to control the "conversation". We don't have to accept PC or put up with it. Donald Trump is showing the way...we must fight back!


fpherj48 profile image

fpherj48 12 months ago from Beautiful Upstate New York

Congratulations!!! Princess of Politics!!


Faith Reaper profile image

Faith Reaper 12 months ago from southern USA

Congratulations on your 2015 Hubbie Award! Well-deserved ...Wow, this hub here is awesome : )

Go girl!

Blessings


breakfastpop profile image

breakfastpop 12 months ago Author

Dear Jayfort,

We have to fight back.If we don't the idiots rule the day. See you at the Inn.


breakfastpop profile image

breakfastpop 12 months ago Author

Dear fp,

If I am a Princess, you are my Queen!


breakfastpop profile image

breakfastpop 12 months ago Author

Dear Faith,

Thanks so much. Actually, I had no idea that I won until you told me! See you at the Inn.


WillStarr profile image

WillStarr 12 months ago from Phoenix, Arizona

Congratulations, Pop! Well done!


Old Poolman profile image

Old Poolman 12 months ago from Rural Arizona

Way to go Patti and bugs.


Jayfort 12 months ago

Congratulations! Well deserved!


breakfastpop profile image

breakfastpop 12 months ago Author

Dear Faith,

Congratulations to you as well!


breakfastpop profile image

breakfastpop 12 months ago Author

Dear Will, Mike and Jay,

Thanks so much for your support! Drinks are on me at the Inn!


WillStarr profile image

WillStarr 12 months ago from Phoenix, Arizona

BTW, just where is 'The Inn"? I keep getting lost!


breakfastpop profile image

breakfastpop 12 months ago Author

Dear Will,

The Inn is in your imagination which, in your case, is amazing. I'll be there awaiting your arrival.


fpherj48 profile image

fpherj48 12 months ago from Beautiful Upstate New York

pop......I was totally surprised about my award too, until I got an email congratulating me!! LOL BTW...My husband used to refer to me as the "Queen." I never liked the TONE of voice he used, but the Title was accurate!!! LOL

Will.....about that PC crap: A lifelong friend of mine told me her 5 YEAR OLD grand daughter corrected her by telling her not to refer to me as her "girl friend" So my

friend told her GD..."but she's been my friend since grade school!" The grand daughter remarked, "It doesn't matter, Grandma, just say "FRIEND," not girl friend."

FIVE YEARS OLD....and the poor kid has been brainwashed. I don't like it. I don't like it all.

I DARE them to even THINK about messing with the terms "Grandma and Grandpa".......they'll have to fight an enormous Army of Senior Citizens armed with vials of prune juice!!!


breakfastpop profile image

breakfastpop 12 months ago Author

Dear fp,

With what is going on in the schools starting with 5 year olds and continuing through college, we will be facing a generation of idiots who can hardly spit out a coherent sentence. I am at the Inn. I want to toast to your Hubbie whether it exists or not!


nicomp profile image

nicomp 12 months ago from Ohio, USA

Xe is a trigger word for me. I need special treatment and a special word that I can use. Please form a Congressional Committee and invite George Clooney to testify on my behalf.


bradmasterOCcal profile image

bradmasterOCcal 12 months ago from Orange County California

BP

Is PC really Political or is it mind and behavior control. The P then becomes People instead of Political, and the C becomes Control instead of Correctness.

An analogy for PC would be like the fabricators of the PC would carry empty leashes and the people would see the leash and run to it and attach themselves to it just because it is there.

The command words are Political Correctness but that is the Master meaning People Control.

BTW, when has Politics had a line drawn where you could tell where you are, and where you should be?


breakfastpop profile image

breakfastpop 12 months ago Author

Dear nicomp,

No worries! I'm on it!


breakfastpop profile image

breakfastpop 12 months ago Author

Dear brad,

Political correctness is neither political or correct. It is stupidity pure and simple. Now it is a form of control because people who break the rules face hideous consequences. What a crying shame!

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