Talking about my generation

"Talking 'Bout My Generation"

Who the Phuque Are You?
Who the Phuque Are You?

My Generation Rules! Your's Rulez...

Talking ‘bout my g-g-g-g-generation (and why yours sucks!).

Growing in the wilds of the shadows of the Haight-Ashbury generation, with free love, freer pot and cheap, pure cocaine, ours was a generation that sent men to the moon (could have been a woman’s idea), and sent moonies to the loonie bin (or just outright kille 'em!)...

We had the Beatles, Pink Floyd, The Who *(The Freaking Who!), David Bowie (The Thin White Duke, for Pete's sake!), The Band, CSNY and Simon and Garfunkel – you have Justin Bieber and Miley Cyrus? Really? There’s really an argument about which generation's music was the best?

We read Tennyson, Shakespeare, Dostoevsky, Hemingway, Poe, Salinger and Stephen King, and you get R. L. James and J. K. Rowling… (vampires and homely hogwarts) - we had books, you have tablets and smartphones (they don’t call this the “smart Generation”, but the “connected generation”, even though this generation has barely touched another person, had a conversation in person or actually laughed out loud at Saturday Night Live. We had “Jane, you ignorant slut!”, and you get “I love all my Beliebers!”..

In the 1960’s, people smoked on airplanes (as did the pilots – I know, my dad was one) and in their doctor’s office (my doctor actually smoked, a full ashtray at his elbow on his desk), today you can’t even smoke at a beach, a park or a bar (even when the bar is outdoors!). Okay, maybe smoking’s a bad comparison, maybe there’s a reason cancer is so predominant today, but the picture is what counts: freedom was being able to do what you wanted to do, not what you were allowed to do.

Oh, and back then, ratting out on people for minor violations (like pot possession, consumption and growth) was a near death sentence, now you get a reward!

With US involvement, get ready for tripled prices

With American inclusion, say goodbye to cheap holidays in the tropics!
With American inclusion, say goodbye to cheap holidays in the tropics!

Cuba, It's Been Nice Knowing 'Ya

During the 60’s to 8o’s, a generation known as “the pot pour we” generation, we knew that sex was over when a cigarette was lit. Now, we have to wait for that gawdawful new invention, “the female orgasm” to know when we’re done. For us, a man in a boat was visualized with a huge whale and the cry “Call me Ishmael!” ( a prelude to “Alahu Akhbar”?).

Now, that little man in the boat’s something you have to search for, not knowing what the heck it is, where to look for it, or what to do with it when found. Ask any girl, all she says is “It’s down there somewhere, just keep looking, honey”…

Sexism? Ha! That wasn’t even invented yet!

We fought for freedom: we freed a world from possibly being overtaken by a rude little twerp with a silly little moustache. We stopped the commies from ruling the banking system (oh, okay, that didn’t work out too well, but still… we tried!) and we watched as the USA’s mighty war machine alienated the nicest little tropical island from American influence. And, Canada thanks you from the bottom of our sun-soaked, sand-warmed butts. Cuban cigars and Havana rum are enjoyed daily by Canadians, yet the Americans, who ensured the Russians couldn’t deploy nukes from Cuba against them, just couldn’t get over what almost happened and forbad their citizens from any interaction with the Island, especially their cigars and rum!

Yet, the 'Yanks enjoy the world’s longest unprotected border with Canada, a country they waged actual war with, not just a “cold” war, and are really jealous of our unfettered access to that island gem. So much so that the US are now in the process of opening up unilateral ties with Cuba, opening the door for Billions of US dollars in investments, and the eventual and uniquely required tripling of the costs of our, until now, extremely cheap and overly friendly tropical paradise.

Damn 'Yanks... Couldn't leave Cuba for us Canucks, eh? Ah well, we'll help them with their obesity with our great poutine meals! We'll horde our oil until it triples in price, then sell it all to them damned Yankees!

What Cuba now has to look forward to!
What Cuba now has to look forward to!

So, Why is My Generation Better Than the late 80's to present?

In the 60's to mid-80's, obesity was something that was rarely seen. Maybe it had something to do with many people growing up during wars that lasted for years? (think food rationing, hard work and so many people enlisted or "invited to join" the armed forces? Maybe they were more active in bed during those earlier generations?

And, just maybe the earlier generations played sports with their friends (actual, real friends! Not imaginary, binary friends of the FaceBook variety!), instead of playing sports on the couch with their PlayStation or X Box paddles in one hand, headphones and mic boom on their heads with a bag of Doritos and/or Hot Pockets in the other hand?

Aside from obesity, during the earlier generations (again, people born or in their mid-teens to mid-twenties during the 60's to mid-80's) people changed how people of different skin colours were treated, and we allowed women to vote (and to strip for tips, but that's a story for another day, and for "Penthouse Forum"). People took peote, mushrooms, LSD, nearly pure cocaine and Heroin, and still just made love, not war. Today's generations get 3 beers in their bellies and want to nuke Islamic State.

And girls weren't so damned self-conscious about having some sexy curves; even the pictures of "models" (model of what?) in the girlie mags were "real girls", not touched-up pictures of nearly anorexic girls.


We really do need saving!

Okay, we killed the planet! Now, it's time for you to start finding ways for humanity to survive the inevitable doomsday!
Okay, we killed the planet! Now, it's time for you to start finding ways for humanity to survive the inevitable doomsday!

How Can the Newer Generations Do Better Than the Earlier Generations?

Well, definitely not with music and outdoor, multi-day, multi-top act music concerts! They tried to do a "Woodstock 2" but it failed miserably. How could you possibly beat the first one? There will never be another Woodstock, but they could still have great, outdoors weekend concerts with the best bands of the day. Just don't call it "Woodstock" - that was a weekend that defined and defiled a generation. Just like no other Boston Bruins player will ever wear #4 again (for a darned good reason!), no other concert should be called "Woodstock" with any extension to the name (think "Woodstock 202: featuring Justin Bieber, Taylor Swift, Pharrel, Adam Levine and Rihanna).

Okay, yes - we made nukes and other weapons of mass extinction, and even used some on oppressive forces (the Japanese). Hopefully, that's one area where the newer generations can do a much better job! We made many weapons that were better than the previous weapons - trillions of dollars were spent and made designing better ways to kill other people - way more than the amount of money spent trying to cure diseases!

Today's generations would rather see pot smokers spend 10 to 20 years in prison for holding a small baggie of crappy Mexican pot. They build for-profit maximum security prisons, and make sure the laws that keep them full stay on the books. Today, Big Pharma makes sure that you have to take 6 to 16 different pills a day instead of just smoking some medically beneficial marijuana; hey, if marijuana were made totally legal, even if just for medicinal use, then Big Pharma would lose Billions, if not Trillions of dollars a year!

When we got caught with pot (or hashish), we spent a few weekens in the local correctional facility... when you get caught, look out! Especially if it's your 3rd time (three strikes and you're out! Life in prison for a pot joint? Yes, there are literally over 15,000 people serving that sentence in the USA today!

The percentage of people in jail versus on the streets was minimal in the earlier generations, yet it's astronomical today. Looks like we should have invested in super-max prisons instead of those stocks and bonds that our financial advisors at the bank pushed us into, huh?

So: How can the newer generations be better than ours? Thay can repeal the silly laws that put people in jail for smoking pot, and put the more dangerous alcoholics in their place. We can put "boots on the ground" and put the boots to Islamic State, and once we're done, pull out of the middle east and stay out. They've been fighting since Biblical times - they're not going to stop now because the country they hate the most (yes, those damned 'Yanks" again!) wants them to, so they can get the oil under the desert to run their vehicles, plants and manufacturing sectors.

Oh - and, you could cure cancer and all other life-ending diseases, invent a battery that never dies, a way to get free electricity and that damned spacecraft we need to save the human race!



Pick an asnwer, any answer! (well, the one you believe in, please)

DO you think humanity can be saved?

See results without voting

© 2015 aladinsane

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