The Media Monster- Portrayal of Women in our Society

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For a very long time now, I have kept my feelings bottled up and never truly expressed exactly how I feel about the way the media has been portraying women for the last several decades in our society. I guess it's time I voice my opinion and HubPages is a great place to do it. I am not the type of person who loves a debate. I'm just writing about the way I feel about this particular issue. It's okay if we disagree.

As a teenaged girl growing up, this constant media that focused on women's looks kept me in constant turmoil. It was on the TV, in magazines, on the radio. Stick thin women modeling clothes, flawless faces advertising make-up, etc. Here I am over 20 years later and as far as I can tell, nothing has changed. In fact, this media attention towards certain types of women continues to get worse, in my opinion. My 18 year old daughter has grown up in this society and I constantly wonder if she is secretly harboring shame, like I used to because I couldn't be the perfect woman according to society's standards.

Maybe it was just me. Was I much more sensitive than other girls my age? Did other young girls hate themselves as much as I hated myself back then? Did they feel the same way I did about not measuring up? Are there young girls today who feel like they don't matter because they don't look like the models in the magazines or the girls on TV or whatever? Are there girls out there that are a size 7 that secretly hate themselves and withhold eating or throw the food up after they eat because they believe they are too fat to be important or that they would never measure up because they are not a size 0? Absolutely! Nothing has changed. If anything, it's even worse, and I hate it. I'll tell you exactly how the message of the media affected me as a teenaged girl:

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Low Self Esteem

I didn't think very highly of myself in the first place so I always looked for outside sources to make me feel better, I suppose. I never felt like I measured up. I was completely insecure. Some people took it as shyness but it was much more than just being shy. I didn't feel worthy and I was deathly afraid of rejection. It was much safer just to stay to myself.

a picture of me in  high school
a picture of me in high school | Source

Poor Body Image

I was a size 9 and later on went up to size 14. I thought I was completely fat compared to the advertisements. Somehow I got it into my head that everything in life revolves around being skinny and looking perfect. I can't believe everything I did to myself to try to achieve that perfect weight so life could finally be good for me. I keep looking at pictures of myself back in high school and I do not understand how I could have EVER thought of myself as fat.

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Anorexia and Bulimia

In order to obtain that perfect weight, I did terrible things to myself. First it was the diet pills. One three times a day. Breakfast a piece of toast with a slice of cheese. Lunch a side salad and dinner a cup of soup. Then to the track every night to walk as many miles as possible. Then came the small white pills that gave me lots of energy. I took those in the morning and drank 2- 32 oz. cups of water. Water helps us lose weight, right? For lunch I would be feeling sick so I would eat a small hamburger from McDonald's and then when I got back to school from lunch, immediately everyday I had to vomit that up in the bathroom. I did it not because I was sick but because I couldn't possibly lose weight if I kept any food in my stomach. It had to come out immediately! Then I discovered water pills.. I didn't want any water weight for sure! It seemed no matter what I did that I could not achieve the perfect weight. Looking back, I don't think I would have been satisfied if I was a size 0.

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Alcohol Abuse

In high school I was introduced to alcohol and I felt like I had truly found the answer! Every time I drank I felt great and I didn't have that feeling that I didn't measure up. I decided this was the solution to all of my troubles. Drinking made me feel pretty and I finally felt like I was one of those girls on the magazine cover.. this was it! So began my drinking career.

Rage/Jealousy Issues

I have to say that I truly feel sorry for a boyfriend I was in a 2 year relationship with in high school. I put him through hell that no one should ever be put through. I was extremely insecure and in the core of me was a rage that just wouldn't stop. He was supposed to pay attention to me, not other girls! I imagined things, I blew things out of proportion. How dare he tip those girls at Sonic!! I would just go off on him and break down. If he didn't give me enough attention, I thought he hated me. After all, I hated me, why shouldn't he? The good news about this is I haven't had this rage or insecurity to this degree for a long, long time now. You can read here about how the rage came to an end if you are interested.

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I know I can't blame everything on the women in the media but back then it really affected me and my life really did revolve around around trying to be the perfect weight, look the prettiest and things like that. I think now that I've gotten older I realize that there are just more important things in life than trying to look perfect. In fact, I may have gone too far in the other direction of not caring but I'll find a balance. Back then I just didn't have enough maturity to understand that. It really took me quite some time to realize that it just didn't really amount to a hill of beans. In fact, I think the most important thing I've learned is there is just no such thing as perfection. It just does not exist among humans.

Watching my daughter grow up and seeing her at the age I once was, it just worries me. Although, she is much, much more healthy minded and adjusted than I was at her age, the media still continues with this message that only those skinny, perfect women matter in this society. If you are not a size 0 and flawlessly beautiful, you just don't matter much. I know that really isn't the truth but for our teen girls, growing up in all this, I think it's confusing and there is no question that it is harmful- at least to some of them. I wish the media would portray normal women or at least stop airbrushing and making these women look like they are flawless when they really have flaws just like everybody else.

My husband and I were talking about it the other day. I guess some things will never change. When it gets right down to it, sex sells and it's all about money. I don't really ever see it changing but I hope we can at least bring more awareness and teach our young girls that there is no such thing as perfection and it's not really all about physical appearance. It's what is inside the really counts the most.


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Comments 38 comments

Jamie Brock profile image

Jamie Brock 3 years ago from Texas Author

Jamie- Thank you :) Wow, I'm really getting weirded out by how much we have in common!! Its nice to know someone else who understands that kind of jealousy. I cringe at the thought of how I treated that boyfriend... no one should have been put through what I put him through. I was CRAZY but even back then I knew it wasn't about him.. it was about me and my insecurity. I don't know if it was the hormones related to be a teenager or what, but I am so glad those years are over! Thank you for reading this... I'm so glad we've met here!


MissJamieD profile image

MissJamieD 3 years ago from Minnes-O-ta

Omg girl, we've got some chatting to do. You and I could've almost been the same person!! I went through almost every single thing you did, in the 80's even down to a boyfriend I had for two years that I tormented with my jealousy. Poor guy couldn't even watch Baywatch. Oh HELL NO! I've been over that for many years too but it was such an incredibly horrible feeling at the time, knowing I was being unreasonable, but not feeling worthy either. Great hub Jamie!


Jamie Brock profile image

Jamie Brock 3 years ago from Texas Author

sanxuary- I didn't see any of the commercials this year for the Super Bowl but I'm not surprised. I am bored with all of it as well. I do understand WHY it sells but it is damaging and in the long run, contributes to the decline of this country, in my opinion. I agree with you about the consumer thing too... to me, marriage is supposed to be about unconditional love or at least trying your best. I mean it's OK to have expectations but not to the point that if you don't get what you want, it's time to throw away your spouse like yesterdays trash and I know this happens a lot and its just sad to me that people do not take their marriage vows seriously. You make some great points. Thanks for dropping by :)


Sanxuary 3 years ago

Did you notice that not one advertisement during the Super Bowl did not sell sex. I have such little interest in sex on TV that it puzzles me that this crap sells anything. The only message they present is that sex is a joke. Its the butt and punch line on practically every show. I would be alone and just as insignificant regardless of what I own. Reality is wondering what ridiculous hoops and issues am I going to have to deal with to get into the pants of the next BSCW. You know Bat ______ Crazy Woman. If she is amazed by my new truck and the beer I drink we are both crazy. Friends by benefits is the number one relationship builder today. All it tells me is that we are now consumers even in our relationships. We sell ourselves and reap the benefits and throw people away when the benefits run out. We are no longer Citizens or People, just Consumers.


Jamie Brock profile image

Jamie Brock 3 years ago from Texas Author

cheerfulnuts- Thank you so much for reading and for your beautiful and honest comment :) I can see how being underweight can be just as traumatic as a girl being overweight. I also could relate to having the protruding front teeth and being called names. I had that too and was treated horrible. I got called names like "Bucky Bess" and "beaver". Kids really can be SO cruel sometimes. I never knew that being a darker color was regarded as unattractive to the Chinese and I can only imagine how bad it felt to be compared to your twin constantly :(

Honestly, I do still struggle to accept myself.. but I've given up on the idea of perfection because like you said, it just doesn't exist. In fact, it's just ludicrous the thought of it now..Wanting to be the best looking, most skinny person is not even important to me anymore but I still have negative thoughts about myself in general and I think it is because of a feeling of being unworthy on the inside (if that makes sense) and I don't know if it will EVER go away. Seems like it's been with me my entire life.

I want to thank you again for opening up and sharing your experience. I think you are a beautiful lady and super smart too! I hope things are going well for you. Come back and visit anytime... It is always nice to "see" you :)


cheerfulnuts profile image

cheerfulnuts 3 years ago from Manila, Philippines

Hi Jamie, this is really a nice hub.:)

I used to be a very insecure teen. But unlike you, I wanted to gain weight. I was too skinny that I looked like a boy LOL. I was also very insecure about my face. I had lots of acne and because of my constant exposure to sun, I became slightly dark-skinned (to the Chinese, dark-skined girls are perceived as ugly). My family wasn't rich so I couldn't afford going to a dermatologist. I couldn't even afford a good facial wash or sunscreen. One of my classmates (who had a crush on my twin) would even call me "rabbit" because of my protruding front teeth.

I wasn't really trying to be perfect that time, I just wanted to look good. Now, my teeth has been straightened and my skin is much better than it used to be. But to be honest, I'm still struggling to accept myself. I was probably traumatized by being constantly compared to my twin. I have never tried to be as perfect as the models. I am just trying to be as good as my sister.

What you said is true - perfection doesn't exist. We should embrace our imperfection because that's what makes us interesting. Perfect people, if they do exist, sound boring to me.

I agree that the media plays a big role on how we feel about ourselves. There are still TV shows that encourage us to accept ourselves, such as those romatic-comedy dramas with an average-looking female protagonist. When I have my own children, I'll let them watch a lot of those shows that send the right message. :)

I think you're a beautiful person. I'm glad you have accepted yourself and no longer try to be perfect.


Jamie Brock profile image

Jamie Brock 3 years ago from Texas Author

Sanxuary- I'm sure you are right... there are a lot of women who are into the "superficial" thing and now that I think about it, I don't see a lot of advertising targeted for men. Ultimately, I think it is about the money.. and sex sells.. and I guess always will. I just hate the message. Now that I'm older, I can give a care less but when I was younger and impressionable, it was emotionally damaging. I probably need to consider there were many factors involved. Maybe if I had more encouraging family it wouldn't have been as much of an issue or maybe I could have gone to counseling if I could have felt like I could talk to someone about it. It was just such a horrible time for me.


Sanxuary 3 years ago

The questions we never ask. I am only guessing that the majority of media and advertising about women is most likely created by women. No one sells a real product its all about selling an idea. Shop at my store and you can be all sexy and change a diaper. Buy a car and you will have prestige and the lady. Every thing is about sex and every thing you buy is associated with it. Contrary to popular belief almost 90 percent of advertising is aimed at women and not men. Spend a day at any mall and you will struggle to find advertising directed at men. Since men know practically nothing about women and the culture in this country believes this, I am betting that women have probably created this image more then anyone else.


Jamie Brock profile image

Jamie Brock 3 years ago from Texas Author

Sanxuary- You make some valid points. Thanks for reading and for your comment here.


Sanxuary 3 years ago

Perhaps women are just more likely to narcissistic and glued to materialism. Then again young men are more likely to be glued to the perfect female, whatever that is. Probably the worst thing happening is the fact that advertising is not doing much in promoting equality. They never promote it and always depict one over the other. Can you be a feminist and an equal at work in your perfect make up, hair and clothes. Still being a ball breaker while throwing your feminine qualities all over the place. Maybe a little team work, balance and most of all real life. We work, we get sick, have a life, were not always rich or poor. We get up, we fall down and we eventually find somebody who helps us up and does not care about a little dirt.


Jamie Brock profile image

Jamie Brock 4 years ago from Texas Author

isenhower33- Ya know, I didn't think about guys and how they might feel... I'm sure it can be a problem for them too. Thank you for reading.. and I so agree with what you said- it's what is on the inside that really matters. That really is the truth. Thank you for dropping by:)


isenhower33 profile image

isenhower33 4 years ago from Crothersville, IN

Ok i had to skip their argument. It was way too long and drawn out. Girls just have to remember, you are beautiful if your own way. You don't have to be perfect. Guys worry about how they look just as much as girls do. Beauty is not what's on the outside its what's on the inside, that's where it really matters. Good hub though :)


whowas 4 years ago

Hi Jamie,

Thanks for your response, I really appreciate it. I wouldn't ever expect anyone to be in total agreement with anything I say! I'm glad that you could find and value what we do have in common and I'm especially delighted that you enjoyed Amy's video (I have to confess that I'm a bit of a fan - my daughter introduced me to her music and I was blown away and just thought, this is so important for young women, what she is doing.)

I'm sure you are right, that the dollar signs in people's eyes are very often the fuel in the machine.

Kindest regards.


Jamie Brock profile image

Jamie Brock 4 years ago from Texas Author

whowas- Thank you for dropping by to read my hub! You bring up some great points and I agree with many of the things you wrote. There were a few things you mentioned that I don't not see it in quite the way you do. I think this is more about humans acting on self will. I don't really feel like God has much to do with why these people do this, at least not the God that I know.

You mentioned this happening over dominance and control... Yes, I think you are definitely right but I still feel like it all boils down to what is going to make the product sell.

Thank you for stopping by and sharing your point of view. Also, for the links.. I really enjoyed the video of Amy McDonald and it's such a wonderful message!! It is SO refreshing to see that!


Jamie Brock profile image

Jamie Brock 4 years ago from Texas Author

Au fait- Thank you for stopping by to read this and for the vote up and positive feedback! Ya know, I've been focused on the media in general for so long, I just never did look further than that but I definitely see what you are saying. I believe too that you are right about the women who may actually have a say probably do not speak up. I just feel like regardless of peoples feelings about it, whether they can relate or not, the main point is it's going to make money and that's why they have done it for so long and that's why they continue to do it. So many times morals and money just don't mix.

Also, something else you got me to start thinking about is that the women who participate by choosing to put this image out there are just as much to blame too. I know we all have to make a living but geez.. I wonder if any of them think about what they are creating in the minds of young girls?

I agree, it's got to start at home with the parent's.. hopefully both of them but at least the mom or whoever the primary caregiver is. I do not let it affect me anymore these days but I know it may have helped if I had been able to talk to my mom about it. This makes me think about that saying, "mothers are God in the eyes of children". So true!

Thank you again for dropping by and for sharing your point of view! It's always nice to "see" you :)


Au fait profile image

Au fait 4 years ago from North Texas

Whowas: Whatever you say.


whowas 4 years ago

Au Fait, you write "Neither you nor I owe each other any explanation or justification for our beliefs, and so I see nothing to argue. As I have previously stated, you are welcome to believe or not, what you wish."

My original comment was not addressed to you or your beliefs, but was a response to this hub by Jamie.

With real and sincere respect, if you see nothing to argue I don't understand why you are arguing. If I'm welcome, as you say, to believe what I wish and I owe you no justification or explanation for my belief that the image of a divine almighty father is a very negative, unbalanced and damaging one, then there's nothing to say. That's what I believe after many years of experience and study of religious belief and its consequences. You believe otherwise. That's all there need be to it. But that was not the main thrust of my original comment. It was not my intention to get into a theological debate and I have no further interest in pursuing one here.

All that was in my mind when I wrote my comment was to support Jamie (this is her hub, after all!) in her outspoken liberation from male oppression through media imagery.

Jamie, obviously you have the right of veto over these comments so I can only assume that you've been happy to go with this so far but I just want to try to get back to my point - All I was trying to say was that I understand and applaud you and wish to offer you and all others in a similar situation to you every possible support in resisting the kind of damaging negative media imagery that has caused you so much suffering.

I have a daughter of my own and the more women speak out the less she will need to feel oppressed by these things.

Thanks for your hub, there is nothing silly about it and I wish you all the best in the future.


Au fait profile image

Au fait 4 years ago from North Texas

Assure you whowas, that I did read your comments in their entirety before making comment.

Not being a Christian you are apparently not aware that "Almighty Father," refers to God for He is the only person who is almighty. You can call that my personal interpretation if you like, but I think most of the Christians on this site and around the world would agree with me as to who "Almighty Father," with caps yet, refers to in their minds.

I managed to make my comment prior to yours without bringing religion into it. Religion to me is indicative of ritual. I have no rituals and I belong to no particular Christian denomination.

As for a debate? About what? There is nothing to debate in my mind. I've read and studied the Bible extensively compared to most Christians and I know what I believe and why.

Neither you nor I owe each other any explanation or justification for our beliefs, and so I see nothing to argue. As I have previously stated, you are welcome to believe or not, what you wish.

It has been my experience on hubpages that when people who are not knowledgeable about Christianity, but determine to write about it or argue about it anyway, just look foolish.

I wouldn't dream of writing about Islam. What I know about it would fit on the point of a pin. I recognize that and don't even attempt to tell Islamists what they believe, or don't believe, and why they may be right or wrong for so doing. Neither would I make any attempt to convert them to Christianity. If they want to know more about Christianity, OK, but if they do not, that's OK too.

I feel no urge to attempt to change the minds of atheists or agnostics either. Since I can't even save myself, it would be pointless to try to "save" you or anyone else. Not every Christian would agree with that, but the truth is that only Jesus can save. So I put my mind to other things.

I do take offense when someone makes a false statement about God regardless of what if any religion they claim. Christians often attribute things to God that aren't His fault, it isn't just atheists who do that.

If you feel the need to reply, I suggest you send me an email rather than using Jamie's comment section to bore people with our discussion as you so rightly pointed out. You can do that on my profile page, right column, where it says "contact Au Fait."


whowas 4 years ago

Hi Au Fait,

I don't want to use Jamie's comments as a debating ground and I've clearly touched on your religious sensibilities. Will you let me quickly clarify?

As I said in another comment on one of your own hubs, I don't blame God for anything. We are the ones responsible for everything we do. We completely agree on that. I don't think the phraseology of the comment suggested otherwise. That said, this hub is about images that impact negatively on the minds and hearts of women in our society and it is my humble opinion, after much calm reflection, that the image of an almighty patriarch served for the larger part by an order of male priests and ministers who frequently emphasize the sin of Eve and many Biblical quotations from both testaments that treat women as chattels and slaves and concubines etc. doesn't really help.

We agree that images are powerful - the image of the skinny model or the porn queen is powerful, isn't it? That's what we both don't like. So the image of the world ruled over by a super-sized, dominant male might be seen as equally unhelpful in the cause of women's liberation. I was referring to an image, not a person. And that image can certainly be submitted to sociological analysis.

I can't personally talk about any actual god - and your personal version of the deity seems very admirable in many ways. However, there is a strong argument that the 'Almighty Father' image promulgated by people who claim to be his followers and prophets (quite aside from what any actual deity might truly be like) is not one that has had a very positive influence on our society.

I do hope that you read further than the reference to the image of an Almighty Father as it was pretty close to the beginning and I am confident that you will find much to agree with in what remains.

If you want to pursue a conversation about images of God with me, I'd be happy - and always in the spirit of respectful and open inquiry - to respond to a message through my profile page.

With great respect and kindest regards.


Au fait profile image

Au fait 4 years ago from North Texas

Whowas, I agreed with everything you said until you blamed all of this on an Almighty Father. I think everyone knows who you are talking about.

God doesn't want women used and abused as they are being today anymore than you and I do. You are free to have your own religious beliefs, or to have none, but do not characterize God as having the same flaws and weaknesses as humans. He does not.

I promise you, God is more saddened and I'd wager angry, by the objectification of women than either you or I, and given what both of us have said on the subject, that's a lot of disapproval.

You make the mistake of using humans as the measure by which you are judging God. That's backwards. You should be measuring humans by how far short of God's standards we all fall.

People who abuse women or any living thing will one day pay for their evil. It is their evil, and their choice to be evil. God gave us all a free will, and He is not to blame for how we choose to use it.


whowas 4 years ago

I am so happy that you wrote this hub, thank you.

The images that we have pumped at us constantly - in TV, advertizing, films, literature, clothes stores, the drug store, clubs and well, everywhere - are absolutely designed to brainwash and subjugate women to economic, psychological and emotional slavery to their self-appointed male masters. It also serves to brainwash the expectations that our young men have of women: sex toys and servants. We live in a patriarchal society, ruled over by an Almighty Father and it is the closest thing to evil I can imagine.

The 'girly' and 'thin' image is not attractive - at least it is only attractive to a certain kind of man - but it isn't about any concept of beauty or even sexuality, it's about dominance and control. Think about it: what kind of female has no hair on her legs, under her arms, or around her vaginal area? What kind of female is boyishly thin and only able to look shyly out at the world, lacking in self-esteem and confidence? The answer: a pre-pubescent female, a child. One much easier to dominate and control, one to whom are not granted the full range of adult rights. That's what's behind these images. The attempt to make women weak and powerless so that they can be utterly dominated.

The only women allowed to have more full figures are in pornography. But that's not about sexuality either, that's also about domination and control and very violent control at that. It is legalized abuse. You see, those women are just 'whores' and are dehumanized entirely. But now we are supposed to think that porn is the ultimate expression of sexual liberation!

I have been speaking out against this horrific sexism, brainwashing and abuse for years and I say, sisters, don't be afraid and don't be beaten down by this. You must reject this. Stand together, speak out and fight for your basic human rights and those of our children.

Jamie, you say near the end 'they really have flaws just like everybody else'. I say, no! They do not have flaws. They are fine and beautiful just as they are, however they are. Not measuring up to an abusive image that is forced on you does not mean that you have flaws! It is the image that is flawed - not you. Let us not teach our girls that they are flawed, let's teach them that the TV, the media image is deeply flawed and perverted and that they, just as they are, are beautiful and perfect. Beautiful and perfect just as they are and anyone who doesn't see that is the one who is flawed.

Here's a video of a pop song by a great, young Scottish singer called Amy MacDonald. She is getting more popular over here with young women (and men) than all those plastic, sexualized pop-factory princesses - and that, as you'll understand when you watch this and hear the message, is a good thing. Show it to your daughters and sons:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ph7-BeEQW4Y&list=PL...

In terms of literature for your teens, a great place to start would be with this article from Ms. Magazine:

http://msmagazine.com/blog/blog/2010/10/22/how-i-p...

Jamie, Jamie, you write 'I don't see it ever changing...' But it will change and we can make it change and many people are working hard to bring that change about. Go now without delay to the following website and check out the Vital Voices Project. Get involved and spread the word:

http://www.vitalvoices.org/global-initiatives/annp...

It's never too late. We owe it to our children. We mustn't betray them. We cannot let the bad guys win.


Au fait profile image

Au fait 4 years ago from North Texas

Agree with you that things have not improved but gotten worse for women. It's easy to blame media for the situation because we see the unreasonable, unattainable perfection, and sexual objectification of women in magazines, on billboards, on television, in movies, etc., and that's media, yes? So it must be media that's causing this pervasive attitude about women . . .

But media is a thing. It has no heart and more importantly, no brain of its own. What or who is the brain behind these media messages? Really, it's brains, because there is more than one brain behind it all.

Very few women head companies or hold decision making power within companies any more than they did many years ago. That's true of media companies as much as any other. There are women, who in their desperation to fit in and be accepted, collaborate with the 'brains' behind the media messages, and they unfortunately assist these 'brains' through media messages in damaging women from the day a little girl is born.

Women are not valued in our society and everything screams that message because it's true. Women are so accustomed to hearing that message it has become a part of them and they never question where it came from or why they accept it.

Women need to be discriminating about the messages they accept and take to heart. Women are programmed to believe they have imperfect physical features, and that those physical features are all that matter about them. Their nose, hips and/or thighs are too large, their breasts are too small, and they are taught by the brains behind the media messages that they will never be good enough in any regard.

Women are much more than sex objects, yet all messages that reinforce that fact are short circuited and never seem to get through.

The second you hear these anti-woman messages, turn them off. Recognize that it is a conspiracy of intimidated fearful 'brains' that are trying desperately to hang on to the upper hand they have had for centuries. Teach your daughter not to listen. It's not to late to counter these messages. Challenge the indoctrination of the age old message that women aren't as good, as smart, or as valuable as men. Be the voice that contradicts that message. Be consistent and relentless in countering that message.

Mothers have so much power. If only they would use their power to oppose the many negative messages their daughters -- and their sons -- are bombarded with about women from birth.

Nothing will change until we make it change. Vigilance and consistency in fighting these counter productive messages from media and our immediate environment is better than doing nothing at all and resulting in our daughters growing up bearing the same pain and insecurity we endured.

Voted you up and awesome!


Jamie Brock profile image

Jamie Brock 4 years ago from Texas Author

Thundermama, Thank you for reading and commenting! I'm always happy to connect with people who understand. I agree with you, it really is a miracle so many of us survive those years. Raising 3 girls must be really hard knowing what you know about this society. My daughter is pretty skinny too and I wonder if she hasn't been teased about it.. I'm sure she has. It's really a shame and you are right. You can't win.. If you are not fat, then you are too skinny or there's always something. I'm so glad to be out of those teenage years but I really feel for all girls that go through that time in their lives. It's not easy to get through as we both know. Thank you so much for the vote up! I hope you are having a great day :)


Thundermama profile image

Thundermama 4 years ago from Canada

Fantastic hub, it seems like so many teenage girls share the same story, I know I did. It's a miracle so many of us survive. I am now raising three girls of my own and fear for their self esteem as they approach their teen years. All three of my girls are very thin, they are adopted and thusly didn't inherit my chubby gene, but are still teased mercilessly for their looks because they're skinny. You can't win. Voted up!


Jamie Brock profile image

Jamie Brock 4 years ago from Texas Author

Millionaire- Isn't it a shame that we couldn't have seen the truth about our size back then? I would give anything to be that size again.. I wasn't skinny but I wasn't fat either... I hate that I have gone so far the other way now but like you, I'm trying to find that balance. I'm about to change my eating habits. I am having health problems associated with being overweight now so at least my motivation for losing it is valid, unlike back then. Thank you so much for reading and commenting :)


Millionaire Tips profile image

Millionaire Tips 4 years ago from USA

I am so sorry you went through so much as a child. I was about the same size you were in high school, and I did feel very fat and unattractive. In retrospect, I looked really good then. I too have gone the other way with not caring about my looks and am working to find the balance. Thanks for bringing up this important issue.


Jamie Brock profile image

Jamie Brock 4 years ago from Texas Author

Kashmir, LOL! I love what you said about the stick woman! I honestly don't understand how skin and bones is attractive. Thank you so much for reading and commenting! I couldn't agree with you more. I hate the way they use Photoshop in magazines to make women appear to be something that they are not. It's just so misleading and the ones that suffer are young girls who are desperately trying to measure up and look like those girls in the magazines. Thank you so much for stopping by and for the votes! I really appreciate it :)


kashmir56 profile image

kashmir56 4 years ago from Massachusetts

Hi Jamie and bravo,i don't think that these woman that they are trying to sell us as perfection are.Most if not all pictures of these woman are done over in photoshop and they are so thin i would bet most if not all are in poor health, if i wanted a stick woman i would draw one.But it is a shame that teenage girls are lead into believing that these types of woman are perfect woman.Thanks for writing this hub and expressing your opinion .

Vote up and more !!!


Jamie Brock profile image

Jamie Brock 4 years ago from Texas Author

Hi Bill, That is so, SO true... I really have hurt myself more than anyone else possibly could. Glad you reminded me of that...I haven't been to meetings in a while and you often say things that I really need to hear!

So glad you are having a nice day, the day was going pretty smooth until a bunch of tornadoes broke out in the area. Thanks goodness everything has calmed down now but it was pretty intense there for a while! As always, thank you for your encouragement and kind words :0)


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Jamie Brock 4 years ago from Texas Author

Christy, I SO agree.... it really is sad and unfortunately I don't think it's ever going to change. Thank you so much for reading and for the comment :0)


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billybuc 4 years ago from Olympia, WA

Jamie, I learned long ago that nobody can hurt me as much as I hurt myself so they can take their best shot and I can handle it...and so can you! I am having a great day and you do the same!


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ChristyWrites 4 years ago from British Columbia, Canada

Jamie, I think this is an important issue. So many girls are looking to the media for assurance at how they look and only see perfect images. It is so sad.


Jamie Brock profile image

Jamie Brock 4 years ago from Texas Author

Thank you, Bill... Thank you so much for reading and for the kind words. You are right and I'm going to try to remember what you said about those who would speak out against me. Its funny that I'm 38 years old and still scared to voice my opinion, even on the internet! It's really so silly when I think about it. Thank you again and I hope you are having a great day :0)


billybuc profile image

billybuc 4 years ago from Olympia, WA

Jamie, any time you write from the heart and tell how you truly feel then to hell with those who would speak out against you. This is an honest, beautiful hub with information that women around the world need to read. I applaud you for telling your story and helping others.


Jamie Brock profile image

Jamie Brock 4 years ago from Texas Author

Thank you, Mark. It was hard to leave this hub published. I sometimes still find it hard to voice how I feel about things. I appreciate your kind words and encouragement :)


Curiad profile image

Curiad 4 years ago from Lake Charles, LA.

Your feelings and words are true Jamie, there is no reason not to tell them and I am glad you did!


Jamie Brock profile image

Jamie Brock 4 years ago from Texas Author

Thank you Emily, I usually do not write about things like this and I almost unpublished it because I thought maybe people would think it was silly or think I am being overly sensitive but it really affected me a lot when I was younger. Thank you for the vote.. I really appreciate it :)


emilybee profile image

emilybee 4 years ago

I hear ya, Jamie. Great job expressing yourself in this hub. I feel the same way....it is not real what we see on tv and it frustrates me, too....I really don't get it. There is so much bad stuff, violence, media monsters, etc, etc, etc.....it is too much to even think about but really great job with this hub :) votes up.

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