The truth about looking within!
In response to a fellow hubber regarding tv versus personal development :
In some people's minds the realities are that we live busy lives that are demanding on so many levels. My philosophy is a little different. Growing personally takes time, effort and demands that we look inward before looking outward. By thinking of locus of control (who/what in our lives make our lives the way they are) people become scared to admit to themselves they can be better or different. The old addage of "Do onto others as we would have them do unto you" is probably one of the toughest things to do. Not because we don't all want to be treated with respect, feel heard and listened to, have a sense of belonging(beyond our families), feel worthy and have some self esteem. No, its because we feel on times (no matter who you are and what you do in life) that someone owes us. Don't tell me you never thought "I'd let that guy get into this lane had it not been for the idiot who cut me off back there". We see the world as 'dog eat dog' instead of one long continuum of events that we have total control over. We like to give 'others' (boss, wife, husband, mother, father, brother, sister, power company, tax man) power over us as a means to blame and shirk responsibility for our own actions. That way we can justify our actions to ourselves. It makes things more palatable when things go wrong... moreso not go our way than wrong in some instances.
All of this plodding and scheming leads to a life that is comfortable, where things 'just don't go my way', where 'people are to blame', and that 'can never turn around'. For if we were to take control back from 'others' then we would have no one to blame,nothing but ourselves to fall back on. We become accountable for our way of living, our way of dealing with others, and our short comings. And really, who wants all that responsibility?? I'd rather watch CSI:NY, that way I'll see others living more crappy lives than mine, getting what they deserve because they didn't take control of who they were/what they did. We choose to live blinded by guilt, shame, disappointment, envy, greed. And it is all because we are afraid of what that accountability will mean for us in the long run, but also what that accountability will mean for situations in the past.... We were at fault. we could have done differently, we could have chosen a different path, but we were too selfish to go that path. So we chose the lazy path... one that is comfortable and easy, one that we've been living for a long time. We have little motivation to consider alternatives to our thoughts, philosophies, our beliefs, because we believe no one else is doing it... why should 'I' be the one to change... 'they' should take a good look at themselves not me.
Odd thing is that if everyone were to take a moment and rectify a wrong they had committed (no matter how big or small) then people would start thinking "hey it's okay to be accountable".... "that guy is a stand up guy"... and not only would you be changing yourself, but you'd change other peoples understanding and perception of us. Sounds like a win-win to me.