Do you think homosexuality is a choice

1. 81

   Spongy0llamaposted 10 years ago

   Do you think homosexuality is a choice

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2. 80

   TJSMITHposted 10 years ago

   Not sure if I am walking in the lion's den with this answer but as a gay man, I do not think it is a choice.  When I was young, I was suicidal, went into a depression, tried everything to "cure myself".  I had sex for the first time when I was 29!  I have removed myself from the human race when I was young and therefore have no social skills.  I went to Exodus (Christian Church that cures Gays)  who claims through the power of Jesus, you can be cured for God did not make you this way.  I have spoken to many ex-gays and yes some of them look like the "SOUTH PARK" cartoon characters flaming queens and jumping up and down like Richard Simmons saying meet my wife Susan, she is also an ex lesbian.  Rightttttttt.
   I asked one of the deacons, what do you do when see an hot looking guy, blonde hair, blue eyes, toned, and tan, with a nice sweat rolling down his hard chest.  (okay I just explained my type) and the deacon said, I turned away and fight off Satan's temptations and pray to Jesus.  So in my mind, you are not cured, you are suppressing, there is a difference.
   When I came out, it was not Club Med.  I lost childhood friends, was written off by some of my family members and put a wedge in the relationships with my siblings that never recovered.  I was not welcomed in my church in which I enjoyed helping behind the scenes in Easter and Christmas services with the lighting equipment.  I have been called names, lost promotions, and can go on.  I am not looking for pity or anything, the point is, if this is an choice, who in their right mind would choice this life.  Being gay is not easy,   Being a gay man is hard.  At one time, if there was a pill I could take to be straight I would take it in a  heart beat but not anymore, I am proud of who I am.
   To quote my favorite character, Captain Kirk.   "I want my pain, I need my pain, it is my pain that makes me who I am"  Well not sure if the exact quote but it is from "Star Trek: The Final Frontier"
   I am sure I will start getting the Bible scriptures responses too from people who wished I would die and disappear and God Hates Me yida yida.  Yes, I am used to these and yes I can also fire back with other Bible scriptures so, go ahead fire away but I will not respond.  I do not have to convince you otherwise or justify my existence.  I thought for many years, why was I born to go to Hell and cried many lonely nights away, no family, no friends, alone, co workers my only interaction with the human race.  Not a CHOICE

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   1. 60

      Kiss andTalesposted 10 years agoin reply to this

      We are all free moral agents .what we allow ,what we do is always a choice. That is simple unless some one raped you. Are you looking for people to agree with your choice or do want to know why you feel unhappy and where does it say it is wrong ?

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      TJSMITHposted 10 years agoin reply to this

      Assuming you are straight, did you make a choice to date the opposite sex?  You just did. Same as  I. Funny how man is paid to kill in war but it is immoral to love a man.  I was unhappy, was past tense because I was not the norm.  Continued...

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   3. 60

      Kiss andTalesposted 10 years agoin reply to this

      As an example if you have a buffet of food before you ,what do you do ,do you eat what you want and like , or do you just eat anything because you can  ?
      Without consequences of allergies.

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   4. 81

      Spongy0llamaposted 10 years agoin reply to this

      Thank you for sharing your story TJSMITH. I am sorry to hear that you have grown up in such a difficult place to be yourself. I was lucky to be born in Canada where the law is incontrovertibly on the side of the LGBT community.

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   5. 60

      Kiss andTalesposted 10 years agoin reply to this

      I listed the scripture not just in one bible but more . this is how the Heavenly Father feels about the subject,and others as follow! In consideration
      Things happen many times not under our control as little ones, and surly our Heavenly Father will

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   6. 81

      Spongy0llamaposted 10 years agoin reply to this

      I am not religious. I am not someone with whom you will get anywhere on the subject of God and the bible.

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3. 78

   Mark Leesposted 10 years ago

   I am heterosexual and I also don't believe it is a choice, although to me it doesn't matter either way. People have every right to do what they want with other consenting adults.

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      Kiss andTalesposted 10 years agoin reply to this

      Well people do have the right to walk in a body they was born in that was not a choice. But what they do with it is still a choice. So would it be right to conclude a person who think it is a right to kill other humans because he want to is right.?

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   2. 81

      Spongy0llamaposted 10 years agoin reply to this

      There is a difference between blood lust and sexual orientation. You will convince nobody that murderous inklings are comparable to sexual orientation. It will always be wrong to kill, and never wrong to love.

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   3. 60

      Kiss andTalesposted 10 years agoin reply to this

      I am not asking anyone to respect me ! You can not because you do not know me. But if you love the Heavenly Father then that respect is due to him. So is your opinion and views

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      Spongy0llamaposted 10 years agoin reply to this

      I am not aware of the Heavenly Father. If you want me to take your words seriously, I will only do so if they are your own.

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      Kiss andTalesposted 10 years agoin reply to this

      There is no need for me to post to you because you do not recognize his opinion or authority ,Which I very much respect. My words mean nothing. For I am human as you are. And I did not write Liviticus 18:22 and other scriptures as to right and wrong.

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      Mark Leesposted 10 years agoin reply to this

      KisandTales, there is no substance to your argument and I can say with 100% confidence that you don't follow all the teachings of the bible. And if you don't want to listen to non-believers don't comment on their posts.

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   junksellerposted 10 years ago

   Our sexual desire is no more a choice than is hunger. It is rooted, like a blade of grass. The OBJECT of that desire, like a blade of grass, may sway a bit over time and space, some more than others, but really, it doesn't matter. Who cares if it is a light switch that someone flips on/off every other day? They are human beings. Treat them as human beings. It really isn't complicated.
   
   All flesh is grass.

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      Kiss andTalesposted 10 years agoin reply to this

      Reference Bible Le 18:22 “‘And you must not lie down with a male the same as you lie down with a woman. It is a detestable thing. Kingdom Interlinear The selected verse is not present in this Bible. Byington Le 18:22 Neither shall you lie with a male

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   2. 81

      Spongy0llamaposted 10 years agoin reply to this

      I do not respect people who hide behind bible passages rather than take the time and effort to think for themselves and offer up a valid point.

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      Kiss andTalesposted 10 years agoin reply to this

      You can not hide behind the truth. You can reject it because it  does not speak your point of view . That is your choice also , I believe in the bible ,and what it says ,you believe in something else.

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   4. 81

      Spongy0llamaposted 10 years agoin reply to this

      You are right about that.

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      Kiss andTalesposted 10 years agoin reply to this

      The same one who said it is wrong to kill is the same one who who wrote Leviticus 17:22. How would you know it is wrong unless it was written. And how would you know about the word love for it is written also.  but it is clear you worship another.

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      junksellerposted 10 years agoin reply to this

      The Bible is written, interpreted, rewritten, edited, and propagated by men, not a single one of which I have ever found worthy of speaking about God. The Heavenly Father is bigger and better than any word and well above the pettiness of condemnation

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   7. 81

      Spongy0llamaposted 10 years agoin reply to this

      Your quotation is barely relevant to my question anyway. This is not a discussion about whether or not homosexuality is right or wrong. This is a discussion about whether or not it is a choice.

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5. 78

   jlparkposted 10 years ago

   To put it simply - No, I don't think it is a choice.
   
   To expand on my answer:
   Just as heterosexuals do not choose to be attracted to the opposite sex, nor do homosexuals.  Homosexuals cannot choose to be attracted to the opposite sex, just as heterosexuals cannot choose to be attracted sexually to the same sex.
   
   This is what is being discussed.  Unfortunately, those who disagree with homosexuality often take this particular question as an 'action' rather than an orientation question.
   
   Orientation means that one is attracted to either one own sex, both sexes, or the opposite sex. Is this a choice? Do you choose to be attracted to the opposite sex? Can you make yourself be attracted to the same?
   
   Not even commenting on the Biblical verses - read my hubs on said topic if you wish to know my position.
   
   Did I choose this orientation? No.
   Do I care what you think? No, not really.
   Live your own lives, and let only that which affects you directly affect you. If it doesn't affect you, or your loved ones - is it any of your business?

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      Kiss andTalesposted 10 years agoin reply to this

      What ever is open for discussion on Hp is anybody business once you post it. If you did not want it to be then people should not post , I do agree about your buisness, So mabe you should tell the one over the post . Or let Hp know you have a problem.

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   2. 81

      Spongy0llamaposted 10 years agoin reply to this

      You are free to voice your opinion, but sometimes in so doing, you open yourself to criticism. I find your arguments and rhetoric to be weak and of little substance. Your bible quote is also barely relevant to the discussion.

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   3. 78

      jlparkposted 10 years agoin reply to this

      Spongy - last comment wasn't' 2 u - but 2 those who spout bible verses. Thats what my Bible comment was about 2. Not sure if u meant me or K+T
      K+T - you missed the point. It's not abt the question itself but why if it doesn't affect u, why care?

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   4. 81

      Spongy0llamaposted 10 years agoin reply to this

      Yes, that was addressed at KT, not at you.

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6. 84

   wychicposted 10 years ago

   No, it's not a choice. I have many gay friends and some family members, and none of them have ever chosen their attractions any more than I have mine. My own attractions aren't criticized or illegal anywhere in the world, but that doesn't make them any more or less real than another's, and it doesn't mean I could change them to please anyone else. I have a close friend whose grown son is gay, and she is quite adamant that, in hindsight, she knew he was by the time he hit 5 years old. That same son confesses that he'd give anything to be "straight" so he could live in our closed-minded, backwater town without hateful people constantly berating him. Every day, people are persecuted for being gay, and sometimes are killed for it. Gay people have fewer human rights, and their relationships have less legal standing in much of the world. Why would anyone choose that for themselves, if they could choose?
   
   Maybe I'm just reading a different Bible, but I seem to remember something about "Love all God's creations, and let Him be the judge" (paraphrasing). I like that a lot better than the "bludgeon verses" people are so fond of handing around to justify their trying to control the lives of others.

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   aliasisposted 10 years ago

   I'm gay, and no, it is not a choice. Sexuality is absolutely a part of our nature. Is it possible that people's interests can be fluid, and that in the right situation, or for the right person, people can fall in love with someone or be attracted to someone outside their normal gender preference? I think so, too.
   
   The most important thing is that... it doesn't matter if homosexuality is a choice or not, because there is nothing wrong with it in the first place. It is natural - homosexual activity has been observed in hundreds of animals, even same-sex couples raising children. It is perfectly healthy - as any leading psychology agency would attest to, the only unhealthy thing about being gay is the stress we have to endure from a homophobic society. Gay people can have perfectly healthy families, relationships, and are otherwise the same as any other person.
   
   So it's not a choice, but that's the wrong question to ask. Even if it were a choice, it isn't important anyway because there is nothing wrong with being gay. Just like there's nothing wrong with being straight.

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   1. 81

      Spongy0llamaposted 10 years agoin reply to this

      I think it is an important question because it is often a contentious talking point for anti-gay rhetoric. The widespread belief that sexual orientation is not a choice would be an important factor in the struggle for acceptance and equal treatment.

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   2. 76

      aliasisposted 10 years agoin reply to this

      I know anti-gay people will often try to claim it's a choice, so I suppose it's important to understand it's not. Gay-to-straight therapy never works, etc. I just don't see "choice" as the problem, I see homophobia as the problem.

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   3. 81

      Spongy0llamaposted 10 years agoin reply to this

      "choice" alone isn't the problem, but it is part of it. I wanted to take a moment to focus on this specific aspect of modern LGBT matters. It is through understanding the parts so that we can better deal with the whole.

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      junksellerposted 10 years agoin reply to this

      That line of attack has two points: people choose to be gay and being gay is bad. Defeating that attack can be done by defeating either element. If being gay isn't bad then choice/not choice becomes irrelevant.

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   5. 81

      Spongy0llamaposted 10 years agoin reply to this

      Understanding that it is not a choice is a step toward making it okay to be gay. I don't think any sort of attack is the approach I would seek to take. I seek to unearth what constitutes the various roots of modern social issues, and start there.

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      junksellerposted 10 years agoin reply to this

      Well, I admire your approach, and wish you the best of luck, but for all the stones I've turned up, I have only ever found fear, hate, and dependency, and I just don't have the patience or interest to look anymore.

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      aliasisposted 10 years agoin reply to this

      The thing I don't like about the "choice" argument is that a lot of things aren't choices - mental illness, for example, which homosexuality is called by haters. But being gay is not sick or wrong, it's natural and okay, that's the important thing.

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   8. 71

      lone77starposted 10 years agoin reply to this

      Ego is the problem. Everything is a choice. Denying this makes us irresponsible. Hate does not come from nature; it's a choice. And we can choose not to follow nature. Love really is the answer and I'm not talking about physical acts.

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   9. 81

      Spongy0llamaposted 10 years agoin reply to this

      It may be a choice whether or not we give in to our nature, but the question is whether or not you think having a homosexual orientation is by nature or by choice.

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   mahwishjanposted 10 years ago

   we we are so eager to know others. its about personal preferences. i like hermaphrodite, are u going to take interest in my hobbies, ooh ayah do it but i wont because i have my life and its awesome.
   
   coming to ur question. yes sometimes its by choice and some times its by birth. i have many friends who are married but they are gay because they are being born with it, and some of other friends are gay by choice.

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   1. 81

      Spongy0llamaposted 10 years agoin reply to this

      Well, whatever works.

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   Pamela N Redposted 10 years ago

   No it isn't a choice. I'm straight but know that we can't help who we are attracted to or who we fall in love with.
   
   People should be free to love whomever they want and not be judged based on those decisions.

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10. 61

    duffsmomposted 10 years ago

    Generally speaking no, I don't. ..........................................

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    cindyyy94posted 10 years ago

    No, homosexuality is not a choice. We don't choose who or what we are attracted to. This is just as specific to a person as is a persons taste. Some people like chocolate, and some people like certain foods while others don't. Some people like hard rock and metal, and some prefer classical music. It is all in our nature and it's something I believe is determined while we are in the womb. It isn't something we learn, it isn't something we choose. It just is.

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    wba108@yahoo.composted 10 years ago

    I believe that there are some are born with a greater proclivity towards a gay lifestyle but I ultimately believe it to be a choice or a series of choices. Now these choices could have been conscious or unconscious.
    
    A comparison could be made with a criminal lifestyle. I believe you could dig up some scientific evidence that certain genes make a criminal but ultimately crime is a choice.
    
    As a Christian, I refuse to believe that God would create a gay person only to condemn their lifestyle in His word.

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       Spongy0llamaposted 10 years agoin reply to this

       You assume that the prophets from whom scripture allegedly originates are a reliable source of His word. Not to mention the subjectivity of translation from one language to another across wide expanses of space and time.

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       Mark Leesposted 10 years agoin reply to this

       And Spongy0llama forgets to mention the fact that the scriptures were hand chosen and edited to fit the patriarchal desires of Emperor Constantine in Rome some threeish centuries after Jesus. Also evolution trumps god.

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    lone77starposted 10 years ago

    Everything is a choice.
    
    Those who say it isn't a choice are deluding themselves. They are claiming that they are not responsible. This is the biggest kind of cop out. This kind of lunacy has crept into our society and needs to be brought out into the bright light and shown for what it is -- a lie.
    
    That said, I think everyone should have a choice in how they live their lives. I think that the gay lifestyle is wrong, but I'm not the judge. God is.
    
    Another, related fallacy, is the idea that people don't want to take full responsibility for things that happen to them. Beyond the fallacy that "my behavior is in my nature," we have people claiming that they are not responsible for what others do to them. Really?
    
    Hold on a minute and think about the following details. Sure, some people erroneously blame the victim. But I'm not talking about blame, which is a negative activity. I'm talking about responsibility, which is entirely positive. Ego likes to blame; love does not. Ego does not like to take responsibility for anything, but loves to dish out blame.
    
    The problem with this kind of illogic is that it misses the real source of our problems. If you don't take 100% responsibility for what happens to you, then you open yourself up for being a victim. That's a tough one to master, I admit, but it can be done. I've experienced it and miracles have happened. It's transcendent.
    
    God created us in His image and likeness and He is _not_ Homo sapiens. Think on that. What does that tell you about us?
    
    When we take 100% responsibility for _everything_ that happens to us, then we parallel the actions and behavior of God. We become spirit, instead of flesh. We become love, instead of ego.
    
    Everything is a choice. You can choose to save your life, even if it means killing a thousand others. You can even choose to give up your life to save all of humanity, as Christ did. These are choices. Certainly our bodies have built in urges and distractions, but we can choose to follow them or to ignore them. We can be a cog in the machine or we can rise above the machine.
    
    Ego is the problem. Ego is a cog in the machine. Love is spirit and truth.
    
    Choose well.

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    1. 81

       Spongy0llamaposted 10 years agoin reply to this

       Yes, people can choose whether or not they act on their inborn sexual orientation. However, my question is whether or not you think homosexuality is a product of nature or of conscious choice. Not the act itself, but the state of being homosexual.

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