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Do you think that Father-Daughter dances should be canceled because not everyone

  1. Der Meister profile image79
    Der Meisterposted 4 years ago

    A school district in Rhode Island banned Father-Daughter dances after a single mother complained that her child felt excluded because she does not have a father figure to take her: http://shine.yahoo.com/parenting/school … 0262.html. What do you think of this whole situation?

    1. Jean Bakula profile image96
      Jean Bakulaposted 4 years ago in reply to this

      It doesn't seem fair to cancel a tradition because of one person. She must have a relative, a neighbor, or a trusted friend of her Mother's who can take her. I think everyone is trying too hard to be politically correct, and in the meantime, are just acting silly.

  2. Shanna11 profile image91
    Shanna11posted 4 years ago

    Yeah, it's unfortunate that this girl doesn't have a father to take her, but seriously... the ONE thing that irritated me in school was when everyone was punished for one, or when everyone had to set aside everything for one person.

    I'm not advocating tyranny and exclusion, but for ONE student? Make an exception and allow her mother to take her, or hold a mother-daughter dance or something. Why BAN it for everyone else? When the rest of the classmates find out that this was why it was banned (is this for forever?), how do you think they're going to feel toward's this girl? She's going to feel responsible, guilty, etc.

    BTW, the URL doesn't work...at least for me. If the mother made a fuss out of this and the girl didn't, then that's even more inappropriate.

  3. Billy Hicks profile image90
    Billy Hicksposted 4 years ago

    It sucks, and it's completely wrong, but I can't blame the school. If they hadn't canceled, I guarantee you that this lady would have filed a discrimination suit against the school/principal/district and gotten a settlement out of it, which I doubt this school (or any school for that matter) could afford right now.

    And I'm sure that now, since this story has gotten so much National attention, the other kids at this little girls school aren't going to kick the living hell out of her, or torment her because her mother ruined something that they'd been looking forward to; no I'm sure that won't happen... we all know how reasonable and understanding little kids can be...

  4. rrhistorian profile image60
    rrhistorianposted 4 years ago

    Another rediculous lawsuit that should be thrown out of every court in the USA.
    Why not sue over the fact that they did not permit the father daughter dance which is discrimination against father and daughter?
    These rediculous people need to be taught that their rights do not trump the rights of others.
    In fact, I would hold the dance at another site if the school would not permit it.
    I would also boycott all school activities and campaign to remove the school board for their lack of judgement.
    Maybe when the young fgirl is left completely to herself, she and her mother will realize just how they ostracized themselves by declaring themselves superior to others.

    1. MelissaBarrett profile image61
      MelissaBarrettposted 4 years ago in reply to this

      I think you are being way too soft...  You forgot picketing the school board's homes, sacrificing a goat on the school steps and boiling the girls bunny.

      Geez... darn liberals.

      1. Charles James profile image85
        Charles Jamesposted 4 years ago in reply to this

        What have the goat and the bunny done wrong?

        1. habee profile image90
          habeeposted 4 years ago in reply to this

          Animal cruelty alert!! lol

        2. MelissaBarrett profile image61
          MelissaBarrettposted 4 years ago in reply to this

          Consider them collateral damage in the war against... well whatever it is that rrhistorian is fighting against.  We cannot stand idly by and watch...well whoever it is that has caused this gross travesty of justice by doing... well whatever it is they did.

          This is no time for half-measures!  We must be diligent!  We must be strong!  America can't afford to take prisoners in the battle against... this sort of stuff.

          Where is your backbone soldier?  Grab your weapons!  Man the gates!  Boil the pitch!  The enemy is...err... vaguely that way.

  5. habee profile image90
    habeeposted 4 years ago

    I sorta understand the thinking behind this, but wouldn't it mean that proms/dances would have to be cancelled because not everyone had a date and felt left out? Cheerleading and team sports cancelled because not everyone makes the squad/team? Where do we draw the line??

  6. Charles James profile image85
    Charles Jamesposted 4 years ago

    Terribly sad if the girl does not have a father figure. Happens to lots of people through parental death or divorce.
    No uncles, cousins, neighbours? Ex-boyfriends of mum?
    I think a father & daughter dance a bit yukky.
    Does the school have a Mothers and Sons dance? Why not?
    What a shame to cancel the dance that other people were hoping to enjoy!

    1. livewithrichard profile image84
      livewithrichardposted 4 years ago in reply to this

      Unfortunately, this type of dance is an outdated tradition started in an era that has long since past in the US.  The Rhode Island school handled the cancellation wrong by making it look as if it were cause by only one person.  But in that one person's defense, sometimes it takes one person to stand up when others would not. Even if all of the other daughters have fathers, could there be 1 or 2 fighting in Afghanistan, temporarily incarcerated , or otherwise engaged?  Also, what if one of the daughters has 2 dads... which one should she take?  It's a changing world and where better to learn how to deal with that change then at school?

  7. peeples profile image89
    peeplesposted 4 years ago

    I was the child in high school who didn't have a father or mother figure. I hated when the school did these types of functions. However I could never imagine making everyone miserable for me. That would have made me feel worse. This girl's mother has good intentions but she's not thinking it through. Now this girl will be known as the one who ruined the dance.

  8. John Holden profile image60
    John Holdenposted 4 years ago

    Is it only the two Englishmen contributing to this thread that think there is something decidedly distasteful about father/daughter dances?

    Remember the primary purpose of dancing.

    1. Billy Hicks profile image90
      Billy Hicksposted 4 years ago in reply to this

      Perhaps I missed something, was this dance taking place in Rhode Island, or the town from "Footloose"

      1. habee profile image90
        habeeposted 4 years ago in reply to this

        lol lol lol

    2. Josak profile image61
      Josakposted 4 years ago in reply to this

      Trust the English to bring propriety to the conversation tongue nice to see you btw John, no I don't think they should be banned, being a kid is tough, being a person is tough, no point over sheltering kids only for them to find out full force once they leave school.

    3. EmpressFelicity profile image84
      EmpressFelicityposted 4 years ago in reply to this

      Add an English woman to the list of people whose initial reaction is "ew!"

  9. Novel Treasure profile image86
    Novel Treasureposted 4 years ago

    I think we are too quick to ban things, so in the off chance we don't actually offend someone somewhere.

    As a woman who grew up without her father, I can attest that it does cause some heartache to know that you don't have your father with you to share these fun moments but there are alternatives. I wouldn't want to stop all father daughter dances and rob others of that joy, simply because my father was not in my life.

    I think instead of banning it, an option would be to allow that young lady the option of bringing a male role model; whether that be a grandfather, uncle, big brother, pastor, whomever.

  10. Uninvited Writer profile image83
    Uninvited Writerposted 4 years ago

    It is rather an outdated concept. I was watching the Talk and they suggested changing it to a Parent/Child dance... allowing fathers, mothers, uncles, aunts, whatever you will... I agree with that.

  11. Greek One profile image79
    Greek Oneposted 4 years ago

    I think dances in general should be banned..

    They are a total waste of time... most men i know prefer to just get on with the post-party coitus

  12. Dame Scribe profile image60
    Dame Scribeposted 4 years ago

    Wow, that is sad. This is where the school should be providing 'teachers' to 'step up' to the role for those missing out. For me, my parents were shocked to hear I didn't go or invite my dad (he was my hero) to our father-daughter dance tongue I was a rebelling hmm tongue lol

  13. kathleenkat profile image90
    kathleenkatposted 4 years ago

    This seems silly, that a fatherless girl would want to go to a father-daughter dance.

    I'm not jealous of disabled people for being able to participate in Special Olympics, or Mormon people for being able to attend Mormon dances at their church, or of boys for being able to participate in Boy Scouts...

  14. Charles James profile image85
    Charles Jamesposted 4 years ago

    Must be quite a boring dance if you dance with the same partner all night BUT I would not want my daughter dancing with a man old enough to be her father.

    We English have to be tactful about some of these strange American customs.

    After all this is the land where they take toddlers, dress them up as princesses, and have beauty contests for pre-schoolers. Not that they exploit  the sexuality of children of course.

    And throwing peranuts at journalists.

    I am sure the Americans have positive customs, too.

  15. rebekahELLE profile image92
    rebekahELLEposted 4 years ago

    I've never lived where schools had father-daughter dances.  It sounds quite boring if you ask me.  What age group does this?

  16. John Holden profile image60
    John Holdenposted 4 years ago

    I must admit to being a little put out when an American friend castigated me for not sending my teenage daughter a Valentine card!