What to do for a teen boy who refuses to do any activities??
Force him to do things? Let him sit around and waste his time? Something in between?
asked by helenathegreat 5 months ago
flagLisa HW says
Many teens just don't like activities. I was one of them. I wasn't athletic, had outgrown dancing school, and wasn't interested in "thing-centered" clubs. I preferred working part-time and being with the "additional set" of friends at work, and then my few closest friends from school. Although most little kids love activities (I did), a lot of teens just feel they've outgrown them; or else that there aren't any that interest them.
Some kids don't like competing or being in large groups. They prefer closer relationships with a few friends. Some kids just like to find their own interests, rather than feel as if they're "forced". Sometimes, if a kid has his own interests that he really values, he wouldn't want to "ruin things" by "joining a club" centered around what he feels is "his own, special, thing".
There's a difference between "doing nothing" and "not participating in activities". I'd just make sure my son had lots of things to do on his own that were constructive. Having things like skis, a bike, exercise equipment, interesting books, or something to collect or work on that DOES interest him can help keep a teen who doesn't work part-time from being bored. If he's got a couple of close friends and enjoys his time with them, I wouldn't worry about it.
Lady_E says
You could ground Him or reduce his pocket money. Alternatively, on the positive side, find him a Mentor (preferably a man). Someone who will be able to talk to him, challenge him and have a positive impact on his life. You will then notice changes and he'll be more than willing to help you do things.
Cry Havok says
Try to find a connection between the stuff he does enjoy, and some sort of activity. For instance, I was a big video gamer as a teen. I was into all sorts of Street Fighter-style fighting video games. I found a correlation to the real world: I ended up taking karate 4-5 times a week, 2-3 hours a day. It was fun, like my games, but it got me into shape and boosted my confidence.

\Brenda Scully says
My grandson is not quite a teenager, but decided he wanted to shut himself away a bit...... He didn't want to do things on his own, but would go and do things with his dad,,,,,
They found a hobby they both liked, cycling, and then joined a rock climbing indoor group. Dont know whether this is possible .........
Do you know why he wont do anything?
sneakorocksolid says
Hey Helen! Lots of good answers here! We made it mandatory our son play a sport. It could be ping-pong or football but it had to be something. We didn't have a problem with that he loved any type of compitition. We wanted him to learn about handling success and failure. We wanted him to interact socially with his peers make friends and do outside activities together. We had no problem with our son he took to sports like a duck to water. Our back-up plan was to make him do chores until participating would have been a better deal. Kind-of a this or that scenario. We were for compitition and so was our son and this didn't set well with the less competitive families. So choose a level that best suits his level of motivation. Good Luck!
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