Why does my husband refuse to do anything around the house?

Just tell him how it is, you go out to work, he does work at home. It is only fair. When he gets a job, you can split the work at home.

He could be depressed and therefor slacking. In which case sitting down and letting him know that he must pitch in one way or the other may help too. Should be a partnership. Good luck.

Sorry, but I don't see any care here or maybe he resents the fact that you are the breadwinner. Try not to carry heavy stuff....

It sounds like he could be depressed. He has no job and is not doing any work around the house, spending his days sitting on the couch playing playstation. It might help to encourage him to do some things for you while you're at work - for example by writing him a shopping list (to get him out of the house) and list of other things you need done. You could even make the list look like a little love note. Try to get him an appointment at some Employment Agencies so he has his name down for at least some casual work. If all fails, he might see the seriousness of his behaviour if you insist he see a Doctor or Councellor regarding his possible depression symptoms. Also try to communicate with him about your current circumstances, because even though it might be tough with him being without work at the moment, he could look at the situation in a positive way such as if you could look at it as a good opportunity in time for him to get some odd jobs done that he might not have the chance to do if he was working full time.

There is surely lack of love, communication and mutual understanding. Talk to him. Love him. See if there is any change or get him to a good doctor.

He needs to understand that it takes two to take care of a home and since you are working outside of the home, he needs to do his part by helping inside the home. This does not mean you will not help when you get home, but it does mean that he also has a responsibility to the household and marriage. If he doesn't understand this and it is a consistent problem creating a lot of arguments, I would consider seeing a marriage counselor or your church leader if you are a member of a church.

He obviously feels that it's your house, your money, your effort... your everything. He is even living your life. To have 'ownership' of your own life, you need to make an effort. So far, he is just your tenant. He is not even pay rent. Why should he make an effort? What would he get from it? He's got everything already without having to own it.

If you stopped earning, cleaning, cooking and providing, he'd have to do something pretty quick smart.

If talking about it does not help, it's probably because you do not really understand the situation either. Think about it, talk about it, then make some plans that involve you both.

Good luck

Probably just because he can, and because he's a man. I don't think it's a lack of love, he's just doing what most of us do if we can get away with it. The traditional method of dealing with things like this is to stop having sex with him, thus punishing him (stick) and giving the promise of rewards if he helps out more (carrot).

Like I said in my other answer talk to him if you dont love him anymore then leave if your so tired of his BS but i think you do love him because you are asking for help and are still with him

Hey Kmac, He should do the chores and cook too! On the other hand I have been schooled by the master. My wife makes learning painful if my son or I left our shoes laying around my wife would pick them up and hit us in the head with them! Then she would say, " Oh look! The house fairy is putting your shoes away!". It got so bad that any time she walked behind my son he would duck.

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The best lesson she ever taught me was when she had her wisdom teeth taken out ,all of them, and she was miserable. Well I was young and figured no sense both of us suffering so I went fishing. She never said a thing until about 3 weeks later when I severly sprained my ankle. Well that women made me suffer, she wouldn't get me a drink of water! She made me hop to the kitchen in pain and acted like she didn't even notice. Lesson learned. The next time she was down I made jello and whip cream, hot choclate, soup, cleaned house, changed the channel, and let her pick the show.

You need to be creative! Oh yea! KeBe this is another example of short people being a problem. Peace.

What I have found is that men will treat women however they are allowed to. That is not to say he does not love and respect you, simply that he thinks what he is doing is ok.

I believe strongly in the sactity of marriage and I certainly don't get the impression that you are looking for an out. It seems more like you are hurt and want to understand. I would recommend a couple of things:

1. Tell him how you feel in a very non-threatening way. Try not to cry when you talk about it, but he has to know, he can't fix what he doesn't know and he can't be held accountable if he doesn't know. Once you tell him, he knows.

2. Ask him to help. You may have already tried that...but often as women we tend to think they should notice and just offer. Surely he sees you struggling with the TV and will offer to help? And yet sadly so often they do not. If you ask him to help and he still won't, that changes things becasue then you know he isn't just "not noticing".

wow listen in no1 ti judge but you should talk to him and tell him whats going on do not argue is not worth it but telll him he should atleast get a jab not to sound rude but hes the man not you hes just letting himself down and lazy the only way you 2 could feel better is if you 2 work as a cuple not just u honey in a marriege or relationshit w,e you 2 should work everything out half and half the same or help him get a JAB he needs to change for himself nd for you.. you cant be doing everything urself is not fear go ahead nd help urself i hope i help

You are being taken advantage of. Don't hold back sex that's silly and you both are punished. Most men don't talk about things. Maybe he does feel bad that he is not bringing in the bacon. But don't try and do everything either. Don't cook if you dont feel like it, make yourself a sandwich for dinner, wash your own clothes and leave his in the basket. Be loving and don't act resentful....this will confuse him. Don't be like me and act out when angry and say things that are on your mind but you can't take back. He might approach you with a simple question like, "what's going on, or what's your problem?" He might even approah you in anger...but let him come to you and then say, "Do you really want to talk?" Remember.....marriage is work. You want to get these things on the table now because when kids come OH BOY! YOU THINK YOU GOT IT BAD NOW!.

Good luck....M