Loading... For the married people, why has your marriage been successful?

Honestly, I can not say that we took " active steps" to protect our marriage.

In thirty years, I have not dreamed only of divorce, but perhaps, even murder.( insert marital humor, do not call 911 ) Surely, my hubby must have a similar story.

My husband and I were very young when we married..............My Dad, shook the hand of my new husband and said, " Welcome to the family, son,......no deposit and no return". To this day, my Dad has never, once , addressed me as "daughter"!

We have stood toe to toe, nose to nose, and we have gone to bed angry.

In the end, I think that it must come down to this: we are committed, one to the other..........we know that if we get through the bad times, the ugly times, the hurt feelings, the wayward teens, the college tution.....etc...............the sun will shine on us again.

I have entertained ideas and I expect that he has also...........but before the apartment can be rented and furnished..............the anger has become manageable and we can now address the hurt and pain as adults should.

That little part about, " in good times and bad"............it is REAL. There will be bad times.........just hang on.

Just, ride the tide and go with the flow, and hope in tomorrow.

Learn to accept the little gifts that your spouse offers you.........everything is not diamonds or pearls.

I can't say that my marriage has been successful even though we have endured 25 years.

Because we have put God in the center of our marriage.

My husband and I have been married for 41 years. We married fairly young 19 and 21, but didn't have children until 11 years later. We are lovers but we are also best friends. I have a tremendous respect for him as he does for me. We would never disrespect each other or hurt each other.

We made certain rules when we got married. No one leaves the house angry. And we never ever threaten divorce. No name calling and never anything physical - that would be a deal breaker, period.

We get along very well because neither of us likes the way we feel if we fight. We've had some battles and each one we learned from and didn't repeat what caused it.

And we share a common faith and that is our biggest key to success.

For us it has been 12 yrs of marriage - 16 since when we met, and we are still keeping it on the bright, loving side. One great thing is that I still make him laugh, and so does he. We have our moments, but overall it takes lots of dedication and re-prioritizing from "me" to "us". I jokingly call it "recalculating".

This is a great question, in fact I wrote a hub recently about love in long relationships.

Our relationship has been successful because we make every effort to let the other person inside our brain. We try to explain our thoughts and feelings in every way we can think of so that the other person understands our thoughts 100%. Most importantly, we LISTEN when the other person attempts to describe thoughts and feelings. We also challenge each other (which tends to lead to quite a bit of laughter). We teach each other things which keeps our lives from getting boring. We're best friends, competitors, teachers, students and lovers. We both meet each others needs and if we don't we make every effort to figure out why and how. We completely entwine our lives. We're like vines that have grown together for years and we've become inseparable because of it.

we're married 5 years this July 11. Healthy communication seems to work for us.

It is the lessons we learnt in life.

It is always learning how to forgive and say the 3 words: I love you

Remember that sometimes argument that has no right or wrong so one party has to give way in order not to make things worst.

Learn how to take time off and relax when you are in an argument. We have learnt how to accept the good and bad points for our partner.

Marriage will be successful if you and your partner understand and respect each other despite. And through ups and downs in your life you should help one another.

I got married to my best friend rather than to a lover, so we always had something to laugh about. Its much harder to let go of a friend than to arrange a divorce.

After 18 years of marriage,I would definitely say that a strong marriage takes a lot of acceptance and tolerance of one another.

Don't expect more than what the other is capable of giving.

Working through the hard times together, believing that there will be good times again.

Good team work is important, except that there will be times when one of you is stronger than the other and when one of you needs more support, step up.

And most importantly - mutual respect....

I've been married 10 years and with the same man for 12. For me, that is a success story. I never thought I'd be with one person this long. I think what has contributed to our marriage being successful is me. In all honesty, my husband is hard to live with, but I look at the bigger picture. He doesn't drink, smoke, do drugs, cheat, or beat me up, so it is easy to overlook any other faults. I grew up watching my mom get beat up and choosing the wrong men, so this is the perspective I bring to my marriage. He is a workaholic, so I have had to learn to be solo more often than not, but I love that I have my independence and that I don't have "ask my husband's permission" if I want to do something. In turn, I let him go out with friends when he wants to as well. I don't expect us to be joined at the hip. That's not my style.

I know a lot of women want to change the men they are with or want the passion and romance to go on and on. I don't want to change anyone and I don't expect to be able to maintain the passion and romance we had at the beginning of our relationship. I don't think that is sustainable or even healthy. I accept my husband the way he is, so I make some compromises, as I'm sure he does with me. I don't claim to be easy to live with either.

We both respect each other as well. We both take pride in each other's accomplishments and we rarely get jealous of one another. I don't get jealous if he looks at other women, because I know he would never cheat on me. I look at other men too, so why worry about looking at the menu if you don't plan to eat?

I think it is important to live independent lives and have independent interests from your partner so as not to suffocate one another. I think trust and good communication skills are also important. No one is going to agree on everything, so pay attention to how you work through disagreements with your partner. I know my husband isn't a good communicator, so he lets me vent and then we're done with it. He sulks and I know he needs a hug to make him feel better. Talk about what each of you needs to feel better, but do this when you're not already fighting. I told my husband that sometimes I need to yell and scream but that doesn't mean I want him to do the same. He knows I need to get out my frustrations sometime and that I'm not necessarily trying to pick a fight. I tell him, when I do this, let me vent and then give me a hug and let me know everything is alright. And it really is when he does this!

I appreciate all the great answers from everyone!