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How to set boundaries around a cantankerous, self centered mother in law?
Told me I was to care for my father in law, while she attended her class reunion- didn't ask if the dates were even free. I am so angry I cannot call her until I sort this out. "Just say no", leaves me vulnerable to future attacks.
asked by Storytellersrus 2 months ago
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C.J. Wright says
I have read a book by Henry Cloud named Boundaries. It was very helpfull in family matters such as these. Simply put, don't allow yourself to be dictated to. No is a perfectly acceptable answer. You don't have to explain. Has saying yes all the time gotten you better treatment? Probably not. We get what we tolerate. Where is your Husband in all this? Is he aware that his Mother is a bully?
Whiteiris42 says
Simply tell her that you will be unable to. You do not owe her an explanation; just say “I’m sorry, I won’t be able to”. It would be better if your husband were willing to back you up, preferably with the simple “I’m sorry mother, she won’t be able to”. If you absolutely must give, inform her that you are unavailable on the dates. This also needs no further explanation.
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