What are your thoughts on being alone in a crowd?

1. 86

   midget38posted 11 years ago

   What are your thoughts on being alone in a crowd?

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2. 70

   clark farleyposted 11 years ago

   in the terms of the Doctrine:
   
   this is axiomatic (to the point of being an oxymoron) for clarks
   is non-sensical (having no reference points, in the question) for a roger
   is not a bad thing (as a predator, alone is optimal) for a scott
   
   the key is perspective, of course...not only on the concept of 'alone' but also 'a crowd'

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3. 62

   TNT Huskyposted 11 years ago

   Clark there is right. It's all about perspective of both of the terms. In my case, a crowd is usually more then twelve people, and alone would mean, for me, that I don't know any of the other people here, nor have  ever met them. I tend to get very nervous in such crowds. I used to have panic attacks as a kid, too.

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4. 80

   kallini2010posted 11 years ago

   I think, a crowd means more than 12.
   
   I remember having said that I find it inappropriate (to do a certain thing) in public, only to learn from my friend, that legally, "in public" means more than 50 people.
   
   Which is funny because when my son who was young and dared by girls to expose himself got into trouble for doing it in front of four people.  He told me about the incident,  I had a talk with him about it, and I thought the case was closed only to be summoned by the principal to discuss it again.  Those girls, the very same ones who dared my son, told on him.  Lesson #1, lesson #2, ....  but again to refute the principal's arguments about the difference between "in private" or "in public", my son said "But there were only four of us!"
   
   One is always alone.  Sometimes you pretend to fit.  Sometimes nobody asks you what you think unless there is a point of decision how to act - if the crowd decides to burn witches alive, what do you do?
   
   Again, using my poor son as an example.  Now is Easter time, when bunnies chase chocolate eggs - I know it makes no sense, but that is how ideas degrade.  I am a non-believer and I once made a mistake of giving my son too strong an explanation why I will never become a Christian.  He took it the wrong way so far, but his views on religion will certainly evolve later.  But now - alone in the crowd - the whole class ostracizes him for being a non-believer.  All these nine-year-olds who don't understand religion if you ask them a single question, tell my son that he will burn in hell.
   
   The wise person would not advertise the views that oppose those of the crowd, but my son is too little (immature) for that, too.
   
   Blending in the crowd is easier and maybe wiser.  Standing on your own is courting the disaster.

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5. 70

   MartieCoetserposted 11 years ago

   I was taught that 'two is company and three is a crowd'. I am not afraid of being 'alone' in a crowd. Depending on my mood I may simply observe and ponder about the individuals - each and everyone of us is 'alone' in a crowd. We were born alone, unless we were twins, and we will die alone. Or maybe I would start a conversation with another 'alone' individual, and maybe more will join the conversation, and whalla, there we would be a crowd in a crowd. Of course, I don't feel comfortable in all crowds and I will get myself as fast as possible out of a 'negative' crowd.

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   1. 80

      kallini2010posted 11 years agoin reply to this

      Good point about 2 and 3 - the most stable combination is two people, adding a third changes group dynamics. It becomes weaker.  That is why when the first child arrives, the family is never the same.

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   2. 59

      Lor's Storiesposted 10 years agoin reply to this

      I think two is fine.
      12 or more is a disaster. You can't hear anyone but loud voices.
      A negative crowd, that's my HS reunions. They are disasters.
      So if anyone wants to get together, 3 is fine but 2 is better. Liked your answer.

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6. 41

   Borsiaposted 11 years ago

   To me the thought of being alone in a crowd takes me back to some of my travels and places I've lived.
   I can remember one day being in China in a crowd of many thousands and suddenly realizing that I had absolutely nothing in common with anyone. Not just those near me but nobody that I could see, hear or even call.
   I can't say that it bothered me it just struck me as a thought.

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7. 68

   joanveronicaposted 11 years ago

   I'm very often "alone in a crowd" I don't usually find people that share my interests. One learns the social graces, so that one's sense of isolation doesn't show. This situation has increased as I grow older, my contemporaries aren't around so frequently.

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   1. 59

      Lor's Storiesposted 10 years agoin reply to this

      I agree. As I get older I'm on a different path than most friends.
      They have families and other people in their lives.
      I'm not married and don't have kids and when I was younger that bothered me. It doesn't now.

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8. 61

   Healthy Mikeposted 11 years ago

   I didn't quite get the drift of your question but i would try to explain it. Unless you are really the freaky type, i don't think there is really anything to worry about being alone in a crowd. My understanding is that people tend to be so preoccupied in their small worlds to notice that you are an odd ball..well unless you invite them. So act like you are part of the crowd even if you feel left out or else, slowly slide out of their view and take a back seat.

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9. 59

   Lor's Storiesposted 10 years ago

   I don't mind being alone in a crowd.
   I chose to be alone.
   But I don't like being lonely in a crowd.
   Being lonely means no one really cares if you are around. I look at it from Reunions and social gatherings.
   I was dragged to my 25th HS reunion and I just sat there feeling lonely.
   You can't make yourself popular,
   I like my "alone" time though. It's a time for me to just relax and not worry I need to impress anyone or to sit with others I haven't seen in thirty years.
   I guess it's a matter of perception.
   When I'm alone I don't need to hurry up. Or always put on a happy face.
   One of the loneliest feelings is being at a wedding with no date. And you watch e eryone dancing. I'm glad that part of my life is over.
   Being alone can be fun!
   You can crank up the music,
   Dance around
   Make a mess
   Move furniture
   Or just do absolutely nothing.
   And just be you with you.

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