Eight Tips For How To Be A Real Best Friend

Best friends forever.
Best friends forever. | Source

A single rose can be my garden... a single friend, my world.

Leo Buscaglia

Eight Important Tips For Being A Best Friend

Friendship is truly one of life's greatest treasures. A best friend is always there, ready to listen and give a helping hand.

Ralph Waldo Emerson, poet, is known for his quotes of wisdom. This is what he had to say about friendship: "The only way to have a friend is to be one." Sounds simple enough but as you look at the list below be sure you aren't coming up short on what it takes to be a best friend.

Here are eight important tips found in a good friend:

  • Be a good listener.
  • Be empathetic.
  • Try to be non-judgmental.
  • Display patience.
  • Be forgiving.
  • Have a sense of humor.
  • Unconditional love. A good friend knows your faults and loves you anyway.
  • Communicate Acceptance

I also believe:

  • The love of a friend will ask how you are and really listen for your answer.
  • The love of a friend stays with you when others dessert you.
  • The love of a friend is a gift from God.

What Is A Genuine Friend?

Friendships can be the most important relationships we ever have. I'd like to share a poem I ran across one day. The author is unknown.

Ageless Treasure

In life we’re given gifts
For which we’re truly blessed
Some fade with time
And lose a sense of purpose
While others increase in value
And always seem near perfect

An ageless treasure
Without limit
Nor with measure
The gift of a friend
Is one with many layers
To be opened agand and again
And handled with care

To put a price
On the heart of a friend
Is to limit its ability
And to never fully know
Or completely see
The love and warmth of a soul
Which harbors boundless generosity

A genuine friend encourages and challenges us to live out our best thoughts, honor our purest motives, and achieve our most significant dreams".

Dan Reiland

Friendship Is Like A Rose

True friendship is like the rose.  It radiates beauty in each of its own seasons.
True friendship is like the rose. It radiates beauty in each of its own seasons. | Source

True Friendship

No one criticizes the young rose when it's only a small bud and not yet open. It is beautiful right where it is, in the course of its growth.

No one points at the thorns and complains that they are sharp and dangerous. No one complains that the rose needs water and sunshine to grow and someone to cultivate the ground. We simply gaze in wonder at its beauty, from bud to full blossom.

The same is true of friendship. Like the rose, it is beautiful in each of its seasons.

Here is another quote I am fond of by Emily Dickinson - My only sketch, profile, of Heaven is a large blue sky...larger than the biggest I have seen in June - and in it are my friends - every one of them.

About Friendship

  • Don't point out it's shortcomings or potential faults.
  • Never focus on its weaknesses.

With time, love, nurturing, and faith, friendship will grow. Take time to stop and breathe in its fragrance and appreciate its development. (John C. Maxwell)

So it is with true friendship...friends are the music of the heart.

My only sketch, profile, of Heaven is a large blue sky...larger than the biggest I have seen in June - and in it are my friends - every one of them.

Emily Dickenson

Famous Friendship Quotes

True friendship...is infinite and immortal - Plato

We make a living by what we get, but we make a life by what we give. - Winston Churchill

My best friend is the one who brings out the best in me. - Henry Ford

Tell me who you frequent, and I will tell you who you are - French Proverb

But do not forget to do good and to share, for with such sacrifices God is well pleased. - Hebrews 13:16 (NKJV)

One of my favorite quotes about friendship comes from John C Maxwell - "Being a friend is easy when times are good or when you benefit from the relationship. But a true friend sticks by your side even when things get tough. This is the kind of friend you desire. But to have one, this is also the kind of friend you must be."

In prosperity our friends know us. In adversity we know our friends. - Unknown

The Velveteen Rabbit

Have you read the Velveteen Rabbit?
Have you read the Velveteen Rabbit? | Source

A "Real" Friend

"What is real?" asked the rabbit one day. "Does it mean having things that buzz inside you, and a stick our handle?"

"Real isn't how you were made," said the Skin Horse, "it's a thing that happens to you.

When a child loves you for a long time, not just to play with, but really loves you, then you become Real. It doesn't happen all at once," said the Skin Horse.

"You become. It takes a long time...Generally, by the time you are Real, most of your hair has been rubbed off and your eyes drop out and you get loose in the joints and very shabby.

But these things don't matter at all, because once you are Real, you can't be ugly, except to people who don't understand." - Margery Williams from The Velveteen Rabbit


How I Spell Friendship - More Tips

My closest and dearest friend, Julie, loved me un-conditionally. She accepted me 100%, faults and all, it made no difference to her. She never criticized, controlled or judged me. She made me believe I was perfect just as I am. Julie always defended anyone who was gossiped about or mis-understood. She found the good in all people.

Julie's body was attacked by cancer. She faught a brave and courageous battle- and lost. I never once heard her complain or cry out from the never-ending pain. When Julie passed away, I knew I had lost the one person who taught me how to love myself. Whatever good and decent thing I have learned, I learned from my friend.

I spell friendship, J-U-L-I-E.

But for those of you who did not know this loving and generous person, here is another way to spell friendship:

  • Forgive each other
  • Help each other
  • Invest in each other
  • Inspire each other
  • Refresh each other
  • Encourage each other
  • Depend on each other
  • Share with each other
  • Pray for each other

Ralph Waldo Emerson , one of my favorite poets, said it all.

"The only way to have a friend is to be one."

Love Stevie Wonder's Harmonica!

What Do You Love Most About Your Best Friend?

See results without voting

Just want to say...

Thanks a million for being here! Be sure to say hi in the comment section below. I read every comment and look forward to hearing from you.

Your friend,

Audrey

© 2010 Audrey Hunt

More by this Author


Comments 66 comments

msorensson profile image

msorensson 6 years ago

Beautiful and very touching to the core. I would love to be your friend since I already know how loyal and honest you are.

Much love, Melinda


creativeone59 profile image

creativeone59 6 years ago from Gold Canyon, Arizona

Thank for a very beautiful and heart felt hub, thank you for sharing. Godspeed. creativeone59


vocalcoach profile image

vocalcoach 6 years ago from Nashville Tn. Author

creativeone59 - It is easy to see that you are a person with many friends - it is a blessing to get to know you through your hubs and comments. God bless and thank you creativeone59.


vocalcoach profile image

vocalcoach 6 years ago from Nashville Tn. Author

Melinda - I consider you to be my dear friend and am honored. I have been very impressed with you since the first time I read some of your remarkable hubs. To be loyal to you,dear Melinda, is to be a blessing for myself. Thank you for your comments, my dear and precious friend.


tonymac04 profile image

tonymac04 6 years ago from South Africa

You are a special and wonderful friend here, and I thank you for being how you are!

Thanks for a lovely Hub on an important subject.

Love and peace

Tony


Scribenet profile image

Scribenet 6 years ago from Ontario, Canada

A beautiful Hub, vocalcoach! I have never had the pleasure of reading the Velveteen Rabbit as a child or adult, so I enjoyed the quote from it. So sorry for the loss of your friend Julie, an un-conditionally loving friend, the best kind of friend there is!


cjv123 profile image

cjv123 6 years ago from Michigan

I LOVED your quotes and I loved your example of your friend. I am so very blessed to have a friend like your Julie - they are rare indeed.

I will say this though - the Lord taught me that sometimes I am to be a friend who gives more than I will receive from that friend. Sometimes, we're to be a friend for them, the Lord gave us a "position" if you will and we are not to "expect" the usual things of friendship back. And that's OK - I have managed to live with such a friendship as well through Christ.

Thank you for such a lovely glimpse into what most friendships should be like. I loved your rose opening - just beautiful! Carol


Micky Dee profile image

Micky Dee 6 years ago

A true friend,

will help you move,

take you to the airport,

help you groove.

A friend,

is there to the end,

and in that darkest hour, may make you grin.


Judicastro profile image

Judicastro 6 years ago from birmingham, Alabama

Audrey I truly count you as one of my friends here on hubpages. You are a joy. I too lost a very dear friend to cancer and Connie is forever in my heart. I rejoice in the knowledge that she is with Father and our precious Savior and we will all spend eternity together. Bless you sweet sister. I finally got around to writing another hub (-: please stop by of you haven't already.


anonymous 6 years ago

Thank you for this post. Very beautiful. I would like to add that part of being one of those friends that you describe is doing all those things and expecting nothing in return. That is what I strive for in my friendships with others. To BE that friend without receiving back. This can only happen with the help of God through Jesus!


MartieCoetser profile image

MartieCoetser 6 years ago from South Africa

Vocalcoach, this is a heart-warming hub about friendship! Every word so true. The excerpt from The Velveteen Rabbit is also one of my favourite metaphors for friendships. You were really fortunate to have had a friend like Julie. Sad that she is no longer in flesh with you. True friends are very scarce, like chicken teeth. Mostly our so-call friends don’t need/want US in their lives, but only our actions - whatever we can do to help them reach their personal goals and/or make their lives more comfortable. Thanks for a beautiful hub about friendship. It is so nice to know you are one of my friends in cyberspace!


stars439 profile image

stars439 6 years ago from Louisiana, The Magnolia and Pelican State.

Very loving, beautiful, and elegant writing , and wonderful sayings, and poem. Your love for beauty and magnificense in a stunning world of so much beauty and color in it is awesome. Your good taste parallels the masters of literature. You are a very gifted angel in the heart. Truly a blessing from our Lord God you are. God Bless You Dear Heart.


anonymous 6 years ago

I apologize for not saying this in my previous post...

I am very sorry for the loss of your friend. May you know the hope and comfort of God. You wrote a great tribute to a wonderful friend.


amorea13 6 years ago

Vocalcoach - thank you - this is a marvellous hub full of love and tenderness of spirit in every way.

The quote from Margery Williams is wonderful and taught me things I had forgotten - just as all your words have. Thank you.


drbj profile image

drbj 6 years ago from south Florida

You are very fortunate to have had such a close friend, and I am sorry for your loss. One thing you will never lose is your special memories of the friendship you shared.

Here's a definition of a friend I once found: A friend will phone you the next day and say, "Didn't we have a great time last night?"

A true friend will say, "Dang, didn't we have a great time last night:" while sitting next to you in the jail cell.


vocalcoach profile image

vocalcoach 6 years ago from Nashville Tn. Author

tonymac04 - Being called "friend" is the highest honor you could give me. I thank you deeply for that and I will always try my best to deserve to be called your friend. Thank you.


vocalcoach profile image

vocalcoach 6 years ago from Nashville Tn. Author

Scribenet - What lovely comments. Thank you for acknowledging my friend Julie. At times I feel that she directed me to HP as she knew I would find friends like you!


ecoggins profile image

ecoggins 6 years ago from Corona, California

wonderful hub on friendship. I love the rose analogy. voted up!


vocalcoach profile image

vocalcoach 6 years ago from Nashville Tn. Author

cjv123 - I too, like you, have been given the admonition to be a true friend to someone who will never be my friend...my sister, my own flesh and blood. I love her so much. She cannot love me or even stand me. I will never understand, but I don't need to...thank you so much for adding this informaation to my hub and I hope everyone reads it. Thank you so much.


vocalcoach profile image

vocalcoach 6 years ago from Nashville Tn. Author

Micky Dee - Thanks for adding your poem to my friendship hub. Very nice of you. Have a great one!


Coolmon2009 profile image

Coolmon2009 6 years ago from Texas, USA

Enjoyed this hub on Friendship. Good writing and I like your selection of images.


vocalcoach profile image

vocalcoach 6 years ago from Nashville Tn. Author

JudiCastro - I, too consider you my very special friend. I loved your comments, especially admiring your certainty regarding that we will all be together, spending eternity together. Bless you.


dallas93444 profile image

dallas93444 6 years ago from Bakersfield, CA

It takes a friend to be a friend... Insightful, poignant warm and fuzzy! Sing it out.. Great hub.


katiem2 profile image

katiem2 6 years ago from I'm outta here

Ah yes there is nothing better than unconditional love we all need it, we both need to give and receive it to be harmonious and at peace :)


Hello, hello, profile image

Hello, hello, 6 years ago from London, UK

A true friend is so rare and yet so precious. You were very fortunate to have found this true friend. Remember all the good time your had and your friend will be with you always.


anglnwu profile image

anglnwu 6 years ago

Love the quote by Ralph Waldo Emerson too. I always tell that to my kids when they complain about not having friends. Enjoyed the hub.


Dim Flaxenwick profile image

Dim Flaxenwick 6 years ago from Great Britain

Beautiful hub. So true. I am blessed with one friend who loves me unconditionally, will not allow me to put myself down when I feel useless.

I thought she was unique until I read this hub. You had and obviously are that kind of friend.

Thank you for putting it into words in such a lovely way.


vocalcoach profile image

vocalcoach 6 years ago from Nashville Tn. Author

drbj - How right you are.I find joy in reliving memories we shared together, Thank you for your ver nice comments.


vocalcoach profile image

vocalcoach 6 years ago from Nashville Tn. Author

MartieCoester - It is because of friends like you, that I am inspired to write a hub from my heart. You have always supported me through our HP friendship for which I am grateful and blessed. Stay close.


vocalcoach profile image

vocalcoach 6 years ago from Nashville Tn. Author

anonymous - You have added the most important element for being a true friend - that of not expectng anything in return when giving. And you are so kind to leave an additional comment about Julie. What compassion you have.

Thank you for both of your much appreciated comments.


vocalcoach profile image

vocalcoach 6 years ago from Nashville Tn. Author

stars439 - Your beautiful and loving comment brought tears to my eyes. I am truly blessed to have such a friend who appreciates and recognizes the depth to which my love for humanity goes. I shall always do my best to live up to your kind words. Thank you and blessings to you.


vocalcoach profile image

vocalcoach 6 years ago from Nashville Tn. Author

amorea13 - What joy I felt as I read your kind and supportive comments. Does a person need more than this? Not this person. I feel so good, I think I could climb Mt Everest. - Almost...:-)


gjcody profile image

gjcody 6 years ago

Just a lovely hub. Enjoyed the beautiful thoughts!


masmasika 6 years ago

Wow, this is truly beautiful and it touches the heart. I love how you compare friendship to a rose. Thanks for sharing.


vocalcoach profile image

vocalcoach 6 years ago from Nashville Tn. Author

ecoggins - For me, friendship is like having a beautiful flower garden, each one unique and beautiful. Thank you.


vocalcoach profile image

vocalcoach 6 years ago from Nashville Tn. Author

gjcody - Thank you for reading my hub. I am pleased that you enjoyed it and happy to find you here.


epigramman profile image

epigramman 6 years ago

...I was thinking about you the other day - I picked up a mint condition copy of The Sound Of Music on VHS for one dollar - and I thought of you as the school teacher Maria who taught the baron's children - My Favorite Things - and Do-Re-Mi - funny how life is and how the mind works - so here am I totally enchanted by your lovely ode to friendship - and when that music comes from the heart of someone like you - it is a very special place indeed!!!


vocalcoach profile image

vocalcoach 6 years ago from Nashville Tn. Author

masmasika - Friendship is truly to be treasured - I am so thankful for my friends and you, dear friend.


vocalcoach profile image

vocalcoach 6 years ago from Nashville Tn. Author

anginwu - You are a very good mother. I'm so very glad that you dropped by. I look forward to seeing you again. Thank you.


saddlerider1 profile image

saddlerider1 6 years ago

A truly blessed hub on friendship and it's meanings. I am blessed to have had 3 wonderful friends in my lifetime. Friends are the foundation of our souls, without them we are lost in a very deep abyss. It has been said that if we could be fortunate enough to count our best friends on one hand in this life, we are truly lucky. I see you as a person of that nature, a true friend to many. Peace and hugs to you.


vocalcoach profile image

vocalcoach 6 years ago from Nashville Tn. Author

epigramman - I now feel so very special - that you would think of me while finding "The sound of music". Awwwwwwe.

The memory of the great Julie Andrews, opening her arms so very wide as she sang The Sound of Music. The way the camera caught both Julie and the gorgeous green hills in the very first scene will forever be implanted in my mind. Surely, heaven could not be any better. You are my friend and I am indeed grateful for you epigrammen. I like your new avatar.


epigramman profile image

epigramman 6 years ago

...and yes a wonderful friend to me that you have become - I am very lucky and blessed - remember another great musical when Rex Harrison was trying to coach Audrey Hepburn to speak/sing in proper English - well you are - MY FAIR LADY!!!!


vocalcoach profile image

vocalcoach 6 years ago from Nashville Tn. Author

epigramman - I remember that scene so very well. If only I could be coached by you, then I truly would earn the title and be your Fair Lady. I have so much to learn and am so thankful for hubpages where I have the opportunity to dwell among the "great guns" like yourself Thank you for your support. "I could have danced all night" :-)


vocalcoach profile image

vocalcoach 6 years ago from Nashville Tn. Author

dallas93444 - You leave such beautiful comments which I so look forward to reading. Thank you, my friend.


vocalcoach profile image

vocalcoach 6 years ago from Nashville Tn. Author

katie - You are absolutely right. And who would know better than you. You are the perfect example of friendship and giving. Blessings to you Katie.


vocalcoach profile image

vocalcoach 6 years ago from Nashville Tn. Author

hello - Thank you for such beautiful words. Yes, my friend, Julie, is always with me. She taught me how to love myself...and therefore, others as well. Blessings to you.


vocalcoach profile image

vocalcoach 6 years ago from Nashville Tn. Author

Dim Flaxenwick - Your words touched me so. I appreciate your sharing with me about your friend. She sounds like a true and beautiful friend. Thank you


vocalcoach profile image

vocalcoach 6 years ago from Nashville Tn. Author

coolmon2009 - Glad you like my hub and the photos. I so appreciate your taking time to read this. Thanks so much.


katyzzz profile image

katyzzz 6 years ago from Sydney, Australia

I guess I've still got a lot to learn, unfortunately, it's been a long journey. Great hub, as all your many visitors attest.


vocalcoach profile image

vocalcoach 6 years ago from Nashville Tn. Author

katyzzz - We all have so much learning to do in one way or the other. You appear to be a really wonderful person and I am looking forward to knowing you better. Thank you.


naturalsolutions 5 years ago

Your quotes make me smile generously, we have to value the friends we have. I know some of them comes to our life make a good bonding and memorable moments the suddenly they will leave. But it doesn't mean that your friendship will end. Even you are apart you will stay forever to their heart. It's really nice to have a true friends who will embrace your faults and weakness and always there whenever you need them.

Thanks for the great read.


vocalcoach profile image

vocalcoach 5 years ago from Nashville Tn. Author

naturalsolutions - I am pleased that you enjoyed these quotes on friendships. What you say in your comments is very true. I have made some very good and precious friends here on hubpages. I would like to include you!

Thank you for visiting.


ElenaZadorozhnaya profile image

ElenaZadorozhnaya 5 years ago from Ukraine

Friends are very important in our life!


vocalcoach profile image

vocalcoach 5 years ago from Nashville Tn. Author

Elena - Hello. You are so right - friendship is a gift.

Thank you for visiting!


rLcasaLme profile image

rLcasaLme 4 years ago from Dubai, United Arab Emirates

Hi Audrey,

I have been preoccupied with a friend, and have been friends with this person for almost a decade now. The friendship just grows stronger and stronger through the years, building us up - my wife.

My wife is my very best friend, and my two other best friends are my daughters. I come home and always being greeted with joy that never withers.

My little girl will jump a hundred times shouting out of joy that daddy has arrived.

I have friends, but nothing compared to my best friends.

If I may, please allow me to be a friend.


vocalcoach profile image

vocalcoach 4 years ago from Nashville Tn. Author

Dear rLcasaLme ~ Your beautiful comments brought tears to my eyes. So very lovely. You MUST write a hub about your family being your best friends. Promise me that you will. Thank you, my new friend!


Jools99 profile image

Jools99 4 years ago from North-East UK

Audrey, what a wonderful hub - friendship, real friendship is something that can't be bought and happens naturally and is some thing to be appreciated every time we see our friends. Great quotes and an interesting, beautiful read.


AudreyHowitt profile image

AudreyHowitt 4 years ago from California

In prosperity our friends know us. In adversity we know our friends. - Unknown

So very true Audrey


rcrumple profile image

rcrumple 4 years ago from Kentucky

What a great hub!

Your story of Julie is so sad. It's more than tough to lose someone so close.

I'm not sure what movie said it (as my memory fades with age), but two girls were talking about what it took to be a best friend. Somewhat gross in visual, but funny, one said to the other, "A best friend is one that holds your hair back when you're drunk and puking." The ultimate proof, no doubt!

Again, fantastic job! Up & Awesome & Beautiful


mary615 profile image

mary615 4 years ago from Florida

Beautiful Hub about friendship. I'm sorry you lost your dear friend, but know that you have LOTS of friends here in Hubland, ME included. I voted this Hub UP, etc.


vocalcoach profile image

vocalcoach 3 years ago from Nashville Tn. Author

Jools99 - I truly cherish my friends (especially my close friends.) You are right about how friendship can't be bought. We must never become complacent about our friends. I wish you were closer to me. It would be wonderful to be friends with you :)


vocalcoach profile image

vocalcoach 3 years ago from Nashville Tn. Author

Oh, Audrey, this is a wonderful quote. I love it so much. Thank you my friend!


vocalcoach profile image

vocalcoach 3 years ago from Nashville Tn. Author

rcrumple - Thank you! And I like your quote from the movie. I have another one and I'm not sure who said it. "A true friend is someone who knows all your faults and loves you anyhow." I appreciate your votes so much. And I am calling you "friend." :)


vocalcoach profile image

vocalcoach 3 years ago from Nashville Tn. Author

mary615 - Oh, dear, sweet Mary - I'm so very grateful for you. And to know that you are my friend means everything to me. I couldn't ask for more!


shanmarie profile image

shanmarie 7 months ago from Texas

Saw this gem on FB. Such lovely sentiments here. It's very touching to me. I don't know what I'd do if I ever lost my best friend. You and Julie were both lucky to have each other. It's a gift and a blessing to touch someone else's life that way.


vocalcoach profile image

vocalcoach 7 months ago from Nashville Tn. Author

Hi Shawnmarie

What a beautiful surprise to find you here. It sounds like you are blessed with a fabulous best friend. There's no greater gift on earth. I miss my Julie. She was remarkable. I miss seeing you and your precious daughter. Thanks for being here. Blessings to you and yours.

Audrey

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