Helping An Alcoholic That You Love
Loving someone is the best feeling in the world, and to be loved by someone is just as great. Love is something that you must work on and you need to find that perfect relationship that can grow over the years.
Growing your relationships make us stronger people and the more it grows you then feel as if two are now one. Many people think that love is just kissing, holding hands, having sex, buying fine jewelry and it goes on and on. By doing these things do we really think that is true love?
Don't get me wrong, yes all of those things do mean love, but is it true love? We do but these things to show our appreciation and our love for our spouse on special occasions like valentines day, birthdays, wedding anniversaries, but some may only show that love during those special occasions. True love should be celebrated everyday whether an occasion or not.
Personally I really don't see that this is the true meaning of love. When we were married we took our vows and repeated to each other, "for better or worse, for richer or poorer." I don't think that too many married people these days really stick by their words and promises.
Many families run into a situation that one of the spouses may be led to abusing drugs or alcohol for one reason or another,and this may turn into somewhat of a problem if not stopped.
So, here we have the wife or the husband abusing drugs or alcohol and one does not do eigher of the two. They see their spouse abusing, but says nothing at all in the beginning. As time goes bye the drinking or using of drugs becomes more and more each and everyday.
The clean and sober one can only take this to a point until words start to flow from their mouth and sometimes from other family members. They truly love the other, but the addiction is pushing their relationship slowly apart each and everyday.
We start to speak to the one we love calming regarding their addiction, but they don't want to listen. They continue on using and shutting out their spouse, because they have found a new love to replace their first love.
Sometimes helping an alcoholic that you love is so hard because you know you love them, but you hate their life style and the addiction. You don't want to get the alcoholic mad so you have to be very careful in your wording so that you do not upset them. As you are being careful of that it's then harder to get your point across firmly to them.
What must be done is to be firm in what you want out of them which is to stop drinking or using. The alcoholic is not only ruining their life they are ruining the spouse as well.
We just have to say to them that they will have to stop and get the help or our relationship is over. I will not support or approve your addiction and you must get help in order to save our marriage.
If the addict truly loves their spouse they will listen and get the help they need in order to not only save their relationship, but their own life as well.
Don't continue to wait and delay this because it will not get better only continue to worsen each and everyday.
So in the long run you will be helping our loved one and you will be helping yourself. It is a very hard decision to give a spouse the ultimatum, but it will save his or her live and your relationship. Stay strong and stick to your decision and by doing so if your relationship is truly strong and full of true love it will work out for both people.
Always remember, keep that positive attitude, stay strong to yourself and believe and you will achieve.
© 2010 Mark Bruno
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