Six Helpful Tips To Create a Vibrant, Exciting Relationship With Your Loved One

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Does Your Relationship Need a Tune-Up?

Every so often, it's a good idea to give your relationship a little tune-up. This will keep your relationship exciting and fresh. Sometimes the routine of day-to-day living takes its toll with couples. This is especially true if the relationship is a bit on the rocky side or if things seem to be getting into a rut. While It takes some work to maintain a healthy and happy relationship, most agree that the results are well worth the extra time you give to it. It can be said that the quality of a relationship determines our degree of happiness.

Help your relationship go the distance by following some of the tips and ideas listed below.. Keep your relationship fresh and alive with just a few minor changes. As you read through the following list you'll be able to see where you stand right now in your relationship and what elements may need changing.

A successful and healthy thriving relationship can be narrowed down to 6 main ingredients.

Your Relationship Will Thrive With Variety

Don't get in a rut - plan a variety of activities together
Don't get in a rut - plan a variety of activities together | Source

1. Sharing Interests Together

One of the best things about having a loved one who shares your interests is that you have a built-in playmate. You have someone to enjoy your life with. If this is something you lack in the relationship, it may be time for you to cultivate an interest in something your mate enjoys.

It's not about the activity itself, the important thing is to provide an opportunity for both of you to do something fun together. This time with one another can bring you closer together. Whether it's viewing a movie together, a game of cards or just a moonlit walk hand-in-hand the idea of being alone together brings a new energy and closeness to both of you.

May I have this dance?

Introduce ways to add passion to a relationship

A genuine hug can be worth more than a repetitive " Love you."
A genuine hug can be worth more than a repetitive " Love you." | Source

2. Adding Passion To A Relationship

Passion is important for a romantic relationship. Make time for physical interaction. Even simple actions such as holding hands when you go for a walk can get the adrenaline going. Or offer a back rub after a long day.

Hugging and touching can also make your heart beat faster. And when you give a hug - really give a hug. Hold on and embrace the other person for a full minute, or even longer. To get your passion purring, you have to put action and feeling into a hug. Hugging has been proven to heal and restore both physical and emotional problems.

One reason I loved living in Hawaii is the way hugging is shared by all as a way to say hello and goodbye. I wish other states and countries would do the same.

Listen to Your Partner

Really learn the art of listening.  Avoid interrupting and making the conversation about you.
Really learn the art of listening. Avoid interrupting and making the conversation about you. | Source

3. Empathy Gives Support to Relationships

Empathy is a real and honest authentic desire to view the world through another person's eyes. It does not mean that you agree with the way someone sees things. Instead, it means that you take the time to listen. You try to understand and consider the other persons point of view. It is a form of validation.

Stop being so quick to give suggestions and solutions to the other person. People don't want their problems solved, they just want their concerns to be heard. Avoid defending yourself at all cost. Instead, reflect what the other person is saying.

To master the art of empathy, do the following:

  • Be open-minded.
  • Try not to take anything said, personally.
  • Be an active listener.
  • Allow the other person to finish his or her thoughts and sentences without interrupting.
  • Be courteous and undemanding at all times.
  • Realize that there is more than one way to see things.
  • Be respectful of the other person.
  • Avoid showing contempt for the other person's point of view.

Share Intimacy Without Sex

   Intimacy
Intimacy | Source

# 4 Intimacy - Not Just About Sex

Intimacy ~

When most people see the word intimacy, they immediately think of sex. But the type of intimacy that leads to happiness in a relationship isn't necessarily physical and therefore applies to platonic, loving relationships as well as romantic ones.

It means:

Letting your guard down and trusting that your loved one won't take advantage of you.

Being cozy, warm, friendly and comfortable.

Having a closeness that is not found in other relationships.

Sharing confidences that matter most in life.

Knowing what the other person's desire, fears, personal secrets and vulnerabilities are.

If your relationship is lacking intimacy, spend some time together alone each day. Simple romantic times together such as going for a walk, meeting for coffee, talking on the phone, or a picnic.

Three Things to Stop Doing In a Relationship

A Balanced Relationship is Crucial To Success

An example of a "we" activity is going on a bike ride. Change the "me" to "we."
An example of a "we" activity is going on a bike ride. Change the "me" to "we." | Source

5. Maintain a Balanced Relationship

In a balanced relationshop both parties retain their own separte, individual identities. You may need to change the me part of the relationship to more of the we part. Balance is crucial to a successful, healthy relationship.

Examples of we activities are as follows:

  • Working in the yard together.
  • Going for a bike ride.
  • Going to the movies together.
  • Attending church together.
  • Meeting others for dinner.

The bond of partnership grows stronger as you balance the me time with the we time.

6. Three most Powerful Words In A Relationship

While the words, "I love you" are valuable in any relationship, there is yet another phrase which is more powerful. The most important three words are "I am sorry." Phrases such as "I'm sorry I forgot about our anniversary" or "I'm sorry I hurt your feelings" shows that you accept responsibility for your own actions.

These words are the basis of all mature relationships. In order for your apology to be effective you may want to include these suggestions:

  • Acknowledge the hurt or damage done.
  • Include a statement of regret
  • Take responsibility for the situation
  • Ask for forgiveness
  • Promise that it won't happen again
  • When possible include a form of restitution

Final Remarks

Even successful relationsnhips have their ups and downs. Go that extra mile for your partner. Treat her or him special. Learn to say "I love you" in a variety of ways. Show your love in your actions. Leave him an "I love you" sticky note on his bathroom mirror. Or leave her a box of chocolates on top of the stove (a cold stove). Get creative and have fun.

A good speech has a beginning, a middle and an end, the best example being, "I love you." ~Robert Brault

© 2011 Audrey Hunt

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Comments 32 comments

Charlotte B Plum profile image

Charlotte B Plum 5 years ago

How true! Simple tips yet they are so important. You always give great advice, and I love to read your hubs - they are full of joy, encouragement and love, even though you might not always be writing about happy topics.


vocalcoach profile image

vocalcoach 5 years ago from Nashville Tn. Author

Charlotte - Thanks for being the first to read my latest hub. You are one of my best followers and I am beginning to feel like I have really been blessed to find you here on hub pages. I appreciate your honest comments and loyal support. Have a fabulous day Charlotte. Sending you a hug.


dallas93444 profile image

dallas93444 5 years ago from Bakersfield, CA

Words of wisdom. Awesome article. I am living your words... I have renewed a relationship I had 32 years ago. We have aged to not "perfection," but to a state of mind of "being..." Our being is sharing and doing the things you have outlined... It is a process...

See: http://hubpages.com/literature/Why-I-Love-Connie-J...


ThunderKeys profile image

ThunderKeys 5 years ago

Very simple and beautiful advice. Voted up and more. Thank you.

- Duddy.


Hunbbel Meer profile image

Hunbbel Meer 5 years ago from Karachi, Pakistan.

Simple tips which often people forget, which ultimately ruins relationships. One more thing that I would like to add is sincerity and honesty/transparency as a key ingredient too. Without it, a relationship cannot last much longer.

Good work done here. Voted up!


Movie Master profile image

Movie Master 5 years ago from United Kingdom

Hello Audrey, some great tips here for a good 'tune-up' I love that term!

I very often leave little love notes around the house!

Many thanks for sharing another great hub!


vocalcoach profile image

vocalcoach 5 years ago from Nashville Tn. Author

Hunbbel - Thank you for your excellent insight and adding your thoughts here. Honesty is most important in a relationship. I think that if we can't be honest with our partner, it's time to bail out. I appreciate your dropping by and hope to see you again soon!


drbj profile image

drbj 5 years ago from south Florida

You may have salvaged a few relationships with these meaningful tips, Audrey. I used to leave little love notes around for my sweet hubby, but my poodle was so jealous he found and destroyed them before my sweetie came home. Finally had to get rid of him. Hubby, that is.

JUST KIDDING!


Lady_E profile image

Lady_E 5 years ago from London, UK

Beautifully written. Thanks for sharing.

I love the photo on top. Cute...


embee77 profile image

embee77 5 years ago

Wonderful, VC! "Try a little tenderness" by Bon Jovi is great. You have very relevant advice for those who've been together for a while AND those in a new relationship. I love your suggestions for reconnecting with our special loved ones. Thank you!


Hyphenbird profile image

Hyphenbird 5 years ago from America-Broken But Still Beautiful

This advice works for all relationships. I recognize ones my son and I have and some my best friend and I have. Intimacy should always create respect and bonding, if it doesn't, something is wrong. Awesome Hub, just awesome.


always exploring profile image

always exploring 5 years ago from Southern Illinois

Good advice Audrey, now if we'll just do it.. Just knowing someone is there for you, no matter what, gives you a feeling of peace and comfort. Thank you. Great Hub......


neeleshkulkarni profile image

neeleshkulkarni 5 years ago from new delhi

like i said no Bobbi's rant today love needs working on.we tend to be selfish to work at love and closeness and hence most things that go wrong do so and we then keep up nights crying that we are loveless.

thanks for taking this further and giving practical tips on how to go about it vc.we all know them but need to be reminded at times.


Denise Handlon profile image

Denise Handlon 5 years ago from North Carolina

Hi Audrey, I thought that I had left a comment for this hub, but I do not see it here. Excellent points made. Rated up and useful!

Loved the photos and video


b. Malin profile image

b. Malin 5 years ago

In a Good, Successful, Relationship, one really does need all the Six Essential you have pointed out Vocalcoach...and above all... Understand, Respect... and saying your sorry and kissing, and making up...Good, good, Hub, and Great Tips too!


vocalcoach profile image

vocalcoach 5 years ago from Nashville Tn. Author

ThunderKeys - So nice to see you. Appreciate your reading and leaving a comment. I will be sure to reciprocate. vocalcoach


vocalcoach profile image

vocalcoach 5 years ago from Nashville Tn. Author

dallas93444 - You are so blessed. A beautiful "love story". I will go to your link and read your hub. Thank you for taking time to comment.

Movie Master - I love that you leave little notes around the house. You take extra time to show your love. Great!


thougtforce profile image

thougtforce 5 years ago from Sweden

At last, a hub about a more mature love! I agree on every one of your tips here and it is so important that we keep on doing this for each other. I love this hub, it is absolutely brilliant! Thanks for writing down your wise thoughts!

Tina


Maggie-May profile image

Maggie-May 5 years ago from the Island of Cape Breton to the Eastern Shores near Halifax, NS

Words of wisdom here, and very nicely said...I hope one day to practice these practical tools and hope I will succeed with every one, Thanks for sharing you well written knowledge!!


vocalcoach profile image

vocalcoach 5 years ago from Nashville Tn. Author

drbj - Good going...get rid of the husband! Always a pleasure to see you.

vocalcoach~


vocalcoach profile image

vocalcoach 5 years ago from Nashville Tn. Author

embee77 - How are you? Great to see you and glad you liked the song. Thanks for liking my 6 tips... and yes, there are more tips equally important. When you're in a good relationship it's so worth the time it takes to work at it. Guess that's why I'm not in a relationship. :) Take care, my friend and thanks.

vocalcoach~


vocalcoach profile image

vocalcoach 5 years ago from Nashville Tn. Author

Hyphenbird - You have added an excellent addition to my hub with the comment, "Intimacy should always create respect and bonding, if it doesn't, something is wrong."

This is, without question, essential to a successful relationship...perhaps even the most important tip of all. Thank you so much. You are full of wisdom and grace.

vocalcoach~


Ubanichijioke 5 years ago

You ve defined it all. A must ve for a successful relationship. Beautifully scribed. Voted beautiful and awesome


vocalcoach profile image

vocalcoach 5 years ago from Nashville Tn. Author

always exploring - You are right about that Ruby. And you are so fortunate to have that. Just knowing someone is there for you is such a blessing. Thank you, friend.

vocalcoach~


vocalcoach profile image

vocalcoach 5 years ago from Nashville Tn. Author

neeleeshikulkami - It is always so good to see you and to read your wise comments. I hope you are as happy as a hog at suppertime. :)


Peaceful life profile image

Peaceful life 4 years ago from Las vegas

great hub..very useful for all


Daniella Lopez profile image

Daniella Lopez 4 years ago from Arkansas

Fabulous hub! I especially love the picture of the little dog at the end. :) Voted up!


Sheri Faye profile image

Sheri Faye 3 years ago from Chemainus. BC, Canada

Great ideas! It is the little things that count for sure. Thanks for this...hmmm I think I will send my guy a little love email to surprise him at work!


marcoujor profile image

marcoujor 3 years ago from Jeffersonville PA

OMG, wise tips, birthday lady... But I am laughing at drbj's comment...which I would have to agree with, unless hubby is that handsome young BonJovi...!

Well written and balanced...Voted UP and UABI. Hugs, mar


Pamela99 profile image

Pamela99 3 years ago from United States

This is just wonderful advice. Relationships do take some work if they are going to be fulfilling and your advice is spot on. I'm sure this is a bit late, but I hope you had a wonderful birthday.

Voted up and awesome!


vocalcoach profile image

vocalcoach 3 years ago from Nashville Tn. Author

Sheri - Your guy is mighty lucky! And so am I because you took time to read my hub and leave a comment. Will return the kind gesture and thanks!

marcoujor - I laughed too at drbj's comment. She writes the most contagious humor. I'm so glad to see you here Mar! I always feel so special when you come to visit. In case no one has mentioned it today - you are one magnificent person and writer. Thanks my friend.


vocalcoach profile image

vocalcoach 3 years ago from Nashville Tn. Author

Hello Pamela - It's great to see you! I so appreciate your comments and want to thank you for remembering my birthday. I celebrate everyday...all year long. :) Thank you for your votes Pamela.

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