Thirty and single. Part 6 - tango is a dance for two.

Tango - a recognized symbol of passion, a forbidden dance, a roleplay and a foreplay... A dance of control and submission. A dance of a MAN, though not possible without a woman.

Rumours (and not only rumours) are that people (especially women) tend to fall in love with their tango partners. At least have a crush on them.

Intensity, eye contact, physical strength. Challenge and submission. Love. Passion. Hate and desire. Magnetism. Lust. Arrogance. All these at the same time - no wonder it makes a dangerous "cocktail" even to the hardest of hearts. I dare to assume that if you are capable of resisting that, you must be denying some part of your own self.

And tango takes two. A man, who would be the leader, and a woman, who would accompany him anywhere he leads her. Of course, in order to fully enjoy this performance, both partners should have more or less similar level of skill and experience of tango dancing. And though in Argentina they say only a man needs to be skilled (woman should only relax and submit to his leadership), I believe they say so assuming it's very natural for any woman to know HOW to submit to his will. Honestly, it does look more like a hard job (watch them dancing!), at least to me..

Just like tango, a mating game (call it love if you prefer) requires the same - a man, a woman, passion, skill.. Only we don't need to spend hours trying to be skilled here - we already have it, from birth, we only need to release it (see Part 4 about inner sexuality).

And here comes the start of all problems - "what will she/he think, if I...", "should I...", "is it appropriate to...", etc. Other party thinks the same way, and we get involved in such a cobweb of all those "ifs" and "maybes", that we forget to enjoy the process itself. Outcome - most of the times we just conclude: "he/she was not my type". Next in line, please.

Of course, there are many truly incompatible people, but what I'm talking about is this: you looked into each other's eyes, you started communicating and you felt that little something, that later just vanished somewhere. That means your body together with your subconscious mind decided that he/she is attractive, and later on your conscious mind made a conscious decision to drop it due to some reason(s).

Long time ago I read an article about how to find your future partner. This was oriented towards women, and the advice was quite simple: smell him. Not the perfume, but his natural body odours, including sweat. If you do not feel sick - he should be ok. And they put lots of scientific research to back this idea.

Yep, I know how this thing sounds..."how to find a perfect man for you - just sniff him out" - well, such title would at least make me read that article, guaranteed :D

However funny this sounds, there is a lot of truth in it, and much of it is very connected to subconscious perceptions. Subconscious mind has a goal - to have children, and it suggests this person would be a good candidate for that (has the right selection of genes), in such strange way. In any case, they base all concept of pheromone perfumes on that - make sure the sniffed does not cheat ;)

Back to the subject. So subconscious mind knows who's right for you much sooner (love at first sight?) than your conscious mind. The latter evaluates prospective candidates in a different way - wealth, social status, manners, any other objective criteria.

For men that's a bit different - their genetics push them to have as many partners as possible, but as much as I know, "sniffing rule" works for them also (if they manage to catch us without perfume/creams/scented soaps). Objective criteria though are quite different - car doesn't matter, but bra size does :D

There is one more thing: unlike women, men have two brains - upper one and lower one. Sadly, they can not use them both at the same time :D And this fact, despite being a good joke, helps men. It's us, women, who are mistaken when choosing a partner, at least most of the times we certainly put too much emphasis on objective criteria, ignoring what our body and subconscious mind tell us (society pressure gets its share). I admit making that mistake myself many times, and I can't say there will be no more.

And now let's get back to the moment where a man meets a woman. Just this time let's dream a bit - what if there are no "ifs" and "maybes"?

Then they both understand where it goes and what are their roles. A simple shop assitant becomes just a man - a leader of the tango. A strict and dominant head of PR turns into a woman - ready to follow him anywhere, if only for those few minutes of the dance. World is just them, nothing else matters. They know it, understand it, and it's their world - world for two. They just dance, flow with the music...

And then already it doesn't matter whether it's just until the music stops, or for whole life..


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