A Casualty of Casual Intercourse

Are you a victim or have been one from casual sex? How does it feel? Are you rather blase about it and simply disconnected? Is it someone you have known not more than 24 hrs?

The airwaves in all forms of media point to that having casual sex, by any definition, is no big deal. Listen to almost any kind of music tweens or teens listen to and be prepared to be shocked. Some of the songs (rap songs are notorious) promote one night stands, no relationships, and drum a steady theme of sex messages like, "passion in my pants", "Doing it in the backseat", "Hey boy, can't get it up", "Alien sex, I'm going to probe you". The mix of sex messages when combined with some very catchy melodies and music make the casual sex messages like a mantra.

It makes you wonder about what kind of adults they will become. Many adults, of course, are already there. They meet somewhere, share some good times, smile and hook up for sex of some sort, somewhere. After the sex, they share some time and say thanks, see ya later. Not much better or more satisfying than a prostitute, except it was free. Even though it did satisfy a physical need, the emotional and love was absent. Even having a real casual relationship with the sex partner become problematic if one party wants more, wants real love. If the other party has not interest, they become a casualty of casual sex.

That is one type of casualty. Then, there is the more serious STD outcome that can ruin your remaining life, all from just from a quickie because in the heat of the moment precautions were "tossed to the wind". It is about the last thing on anyone's mind-but it has got to be!

There is still a more personal casualty of casual sex- yourself. No matter how much of a facade you use to cover your own inner personal feelings, there is a lack of respect for yourself. Wherever that feeling came from, that feeling of not feeling real love, makes you continue doing the same thing. Maybe in the casual sex lifestyle you will find real love, the kind you see in movies and in real life.

If you spent your 20's in casual sex adventures, but by the 30's, you seriously wonder if real love will be ever found. Like anything in life, the casual sex becomes routine. It becomes horribly disconnected, void of meaning. You meet, have fun, do it and then their gone. Then, its on to the next one. You become cynical about love.

If short term, casual sex is fine as long as some sort of relationship exists. But just doing it to fill a need without wanting a relationship indicates something is seriously wrong with you as a human being.

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Comments 5 comments

flacoinohio profile image

flacoinohio 4 years ago from Ohio

Interesting ending, while I am no longer a single person, in my youth I was exactly the person you are describing. Having casual sex without the emotional attachment worked for me, especially after having a bad relationship or two where there was infidelity and ultimately a loss of assets. I may have something wrong with me, but how do you know your opinion is correct? Man has been around much longer than religion, man is an animal just like any other creature with sexual urges and multiple partners. Casual sex evolved from instinctive mating, man just happened to be smart enough to figu


flacoinohio profile image

flacoinohio 4 years ago from Ohio

I think people having sex without a committed relationship is perfectly natural. Prior to the creation of morals and religion, humans were just as instinctive as animals when it comes to mating. Not every sexual encounter produces a child and our natural instinct is to mate with as many people as possible to spread our genes. Casual sex is as old as we are, I believe that having casual sex makes people more human. Standards for sex have changed simply because the men making the decisions were not having sex or were sexual deviants and had the power to impose their beliefs on the population. I believe the ten commandments indicate that as long as a man does not covet another man's wife, the rest of the women are fair game, even if the relationship is purely sexual. Then again everyone is entitled to their opinion and beliefs.


perrya profile image

perrya 4 years ago Author

I agree, but I think there IS a reason for it. Something is pushing not to have a relationship. Usually past bad relationships.


FGual profile image

FGual 4 years ago from USA

A lot of wisdom in your words, but the real world is another story. Eliminating the commercialized pornification that so many profit from would be great. At the end of the day, men are not monogamous by nature and naughty girls lose it early.


perrya profile image

perrya 4 years ago Author

But, hey, we all have gotta try!

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