A Guide For People Visiting Patients in The Hospital

THIS SUMS UP THIS HUB . . .

just look at the "party" going on in this sick man's room in the hospital. This behavior is not acceptable to the well-being of the patient.
just look at the "party" going on in this sick man's room in the hospital. This behavior is not acceptable to the well-being of the patient.

Doctors and nurses have important work to do. And by you dishonoring the rules for visitation, their jobs are only made harder.

THE CARE OF THE PATIENT IS THE NUMBER ONE PRIORITY FOR ANY DOCTOR OR NURSE.
THE CARE OF THE PATIENT IS THE NUMBER ONE PRIORITY FOR ANY DOCTOR OR NURSE.
DOCTOR: "YOU LOOK GOOD, JIM!" JIM: "THANKS, DOC. I FEEL GOOD BECAUSE MY ROOM WASN'T FULL OF PEOPLE KEEPING ME AWAKE."
DOCTOR: "YOU LOOK GOOD, JIM!" JIM: "THANKS, DOC. I FEEL GOOD BECAUSE MY ROOM WASN'T FULL OF PEOPLE KEEPING ME AWAKE."
"DOING GOOD, SIR?" ASKS THIS CARING DOCTOR. THIS DOCTOR APPRECIATES HOW YOU HONOR THE RULES FOR HOSPITAL VISITS.
"DOING GOOD, SIR?" ASKS THIS CARING DOCTOR. THIS DOCTOR APPRECIATES HOW YOU HONOR THE RULES FOR HOSPITAL VISITS.
THIS LITTLE GIRL WON'T BE SMILING AS MUCH WHEN HER ROOM IS FULL OF PEOPLE YAKKING, LAUGHING, AND DISTURBING HER SLEEP.
THIS LITTLE GIRL WON'T BE SMILING AS MUCH WHEN HER ROOM IS FULL OF PEOPLE YAKKING, LAUGHING, AND DISTURBING HER SLEEP.
REST AND SLEEP ARE KEY INGREDIENTS IN ANY PATIENT'S RECOVERY.
REST AND SLEEP ARE KEY INGREDIENTS IN ANY PATIENT'S RECOVERY.
"LAY STILL, MA'AM," SAYS THIS REGISTERED NURSE. TAKING TEMPERATURE OF A PATIENT IS AN IMPORTANT JOB.
"LAY STILL, MA'AM," SAYS THIS REGISTERED NURSE. TAKING TEMPERATURE OF A PATIENT IS AN IMPORTANT JOB.
WORKING IN TANDEM, A DOCTOR AND NURSE CHECK-OUT THIS PATIENT'S CONDITION.
WORKING IN TANDEM, A DOCTOR AND NURSE CHECK-OUT THIS PATIENT'S CONDITION.
THIS GIRL IS SICK. REALLY SICK. SHE DOESN'T NEED A CROWD IN HER HOSPITAL ROOM TO  "CHEER HER UP," JUST REST, SLEEP AND MEDICAL ATTENTION.
THIS GIRL IS SICK. REALLY SICK. SHE DOESN'T NEED A CROWD IN HER HOSPITAL ROOM TO "CHEER HER UP," JUST REST, SLEEP AND MEDICAL ATTENTION.
"HANG IN THERE, DAD," SAYS THIS CONCERNED DAUGHTER. SEE? ONLY ONE VISITOR TO THIS SICK  MAN'S ROOM.
"HANG IN THERE, DAD," SAYS THIS CONCERNED DAUGHTER. SEE? ONLY ONE VISITOR TO THIS SICK MAN'S ROOM.

One day you are going about your daily business, catching up on that needed-office work that the boss has been riding you to finish. Then, as if the world has stopped in its axis, you get a phone call, an urgent phone call from your uncle "Thad," who informs you that your first-cousin, "Joby," has been admitted to the hospital for emergency surgery. You panic.

You dash to your office manager and tell her that you are "gone for the day," as you have to be with "Joby," when he comes to after his harrowing-surgery. What a good cousin you are. All heart. You are a tribute to "caring people" everywhere.

On the way to the hospital, you stop off at a fast-food restaurant and buy "Joby," a double cheeseburger, fries, cheese sticks and a drink. Then you whiz over to TARGET to get his needed-things for his hospital stay. Things such as: men muscle-building magazines; chewing gum; toothpaste; several sticks of beef jerky (the chewy kind) and a funny "get well soon," card with a lazy dog on the cover. All out of your own pocket. What a gal you are.

But, (you just knew there would be a 'but') upon your arrival at the hospital and you are lugging the items for "Joby," down the hall, almost dropping his beef jerky, an orderly stops you and sternly says, "miss, you are not allowed to bring those things on "this" floor. This is the Recovery Unit for surgery patients." You are stunned. Dumbfounded. Hardly able to speak to "Robb," the orderly, but you manage to form these words,"seriously? I am here to see my first-cousin, "Joby," who had to have emergency surgery, so stand aside, mister, this gal is going through." Wrong. And so wrong that the hospital administrator is called-in for back-up to handle your outbursts.

"Robb," an attentive orderly of 24 years, explains that no one, even "Joby," can have any of those things you are holding in your hands. Your first-cousin had surgery to remove a screwdriver that he swallowed on a dare from his best bud, "Flaky Frank," a known delinquent and school drop-out.

See what good intentions can get you sometimes? Trouble. But do not beat yourself up for thinking of "Joby," you are still a good-hearted woman. But you, like most visitors to hospitals, need to brush-up on today's rules for visitors who are visiting their family or friends who have to stay a night or two in the hospital.

So, I present, a few sensible rules (that I researched for a week) that all visitors can use FREE when they have to visit a sick friend of family member in their hospital room.

I proudly present . . ."A Guide For People Visiting Patients In Hospitals" . . .

1.) You are not a doctor. You barely graduated high school, so do not go off telling your friend or family member who is "laid up" in the hospital that "you" think that this black area on his or her arm is just a part of growing up. For decency's sake. The patient is 50 years of age.

2.) Do not start doing a personal comedy routine for your friend or family member lying in the hospital bed with tubes running in and out of him or her. "Aww, Ken, lighten-up. Laughter is good for the body and soul," you argue like any uninformed hospital visitor would. You see, your jokes are not funny. And the patient will be forced into an emotional trauma at "trying" to laugh so not to hurt your feelings. Just be quiet. Talk softly. And leave the comedy to pro's like (some of) us on HubPages.

3.) Pets are a definite no, no! Even if your friend or family member is close to his blue tick hound named, "Dozer," this rule is to be followed to the letter. Your friend or family member needs rest, not a rousing game of "fetch" with "Dozer," who is not able to run due to age and arthritis. Truth be told, "Dozer," needs the medical attention more than your friend.

4.) You are in a hospital room. Quiet. Peaceful. Do not bring your portable stereo system and jam out with "Sweet Home Alabama," by the late, great Lynyrd Skynyrd. If you must play anything, play "After Midnight," by Judas Priest. That type of music sounds more upbeat anyway.

5.) Do not continually ask your friend or family member, "you feel better now?" or "ready to go home?" Oh, that last one is an awful thing to say to a patient hooked-up to a morphine drip. And to get his or her hopes up about going home can be rough when the doctor crudely says, "Home? Seriously? You are going to stay with us for at least two more weeks."

6.) Do not fill-up the patient's room with more friends and family members. And please do not be so cocky that you say to "Robb," the orderly who points out the "One Visitor At a Time" sign on the patient's door, "Hey, man, we are family. That sign doesn't apply to us." Well how do you like making new friends such as "Bill," the ex-Marine who serves the hospital in the capacity as a volunteer security guard?

7.) Do not look for heated arguments with other visitors in "Joby's" room. Just because they do not attend the same church as you do is no reason for you to "call them out" and start a verbal ruckus. There are other patients on this floor besides "Joby," who never darkened a church house door in his 27 years of living.

8.) If you are a guy, do not flirt with every pretty nurse who enters "Joby's" room. She is there to do her job and take care of "Joby," not give you her phone number and agree to go with you to "Zingo's Beer and Wings," when her shift is over.

9.) If you are a woman, do not flirt with the male orderlies or doctors when they come to check "Joby," to see if his condition is better. Doctors are sharp, ladies. They know when a woman is wanting to "hook up" with them for marital security.

10.) Do not turn the television in the room up so loud that the people in the lobby six floors down can make out everything that Scott Pelley, of the CBS Evening News is saying. Use common sense. That always works.

11.) Do not use the phone in "Joby's" room to catch-up with your sales calls you missed for coming to visit "Joby." He will be hurt at your insensitivity and probably never speak to you again. Hey, not a bad idea. Make all the sales calls you want. "Joby" won't mind one little bit.

12.) Do not use "Joby's" hospital bed for a couch. He is recovering from a serious surgery. The surgeons still talk about how a man can get a screwdriver that big down his gullet, so give "Joby," some space. He might want to take on another daring challenge when he recovers.

13.) Please, I beg you, do not smoke cigarettes in the bathroom in "Joby's" room. Or chew smokeless tobacco and spit in Styrofoam cups that you forget about and leave sitting everywhere. Please use the brain that God gave you. And respect "Joby."

Now that I am finished with my heart felt piece that will surely be of help to someone, somewhere, I need to ask you one last question . . .

"When are you and 'Robb,' going out?"

AN EMPTY HOSPITAL BED . . .

That is the goal of everyone who honors the rules for visiting patients in the hospital. An empty hospital bed means that the patient has recovered and now doing well at home.
That is the goal of everyone who honors the rules for visiting patients in the hospital. An empty hospital bed means that the patient has recovered and now doing well at home.

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Comments 12 comments

dinkan53 profile image

dinkan53 4 years ago from India

I'm impressed. The contents are masterpiece. I care for such information a lot. Voted up and rated as useful. Thank you and good luckā€¦.


shea duane profile image

shea duane 4 years ago from new jersey

Even here, your attention to detail is wonderful! I just hope you were not in the hospital recently!


Giselle Maine 4 years ago

Great work! Aside from pets, I would also say that very young noisy kids might be best not to stay for too long. I mean, a short visit (or even multiple short visits) with kids is probably just fine, but noisy young kids can be very disruptive on the rest and recovery of other patients. I know this because in the maternity ward the person whose room was next to mine had a visitor with young kids for about 4 or 5 hours! It might have been her own kids with the Dad bringing them in, but the noise didn't stay just within their walls! So it was really hard to sleep... every time I'd doze off some kid would drop a toy next door or something. And on a maternity ward there is no such thing as thinking 'oh well at least I'll be able to sleep at night'. In a maternity ward us moms have to wake up multiple times a night to feed baby. Fortunately for me I had an uncomplicated delivery which translated into a prompt return home (yay!) so I didn't have to put up with other patients noisy visitors forever.

Visitors, please please think of other patients if bringing young noisy kids in for any length of time. Not saying never to do it, just to take the kids outside for a walk if they get noisy or upset, etc - be sensible for the sake of others and maybe make a bunch of shorter visits instead of one marathon visit. Or if you want a long visit, have someone else visit with you who you can trade off the kids with while the other person visits the hospital patient.

Thanks for a great hub Kenneth. Although I have to say, I don't think I would object to having a visitor who tried out a comedy routine on me! I would have enjoyed that to take my mind of the pain when in labor for delivering my baby. As always I love the pics and captions. I found the bit you wrote about Dozer to be hilarious, that was my favorite bit of the hub!


RunAbstract profile image

RunAbstract 4 years ago from USA

Alot of good advise, laced with alot of good humor!

Voted up and more!


catgypsy profile image

catgypsy 4 years ago from the South

Another funny, but useful hub! You can take any subject, no matter how serious it is, and make it funny, but still darned good advice. You truly have a special flair Kenneth! Loved it!


picklesandrufus profile image

picklesandrufus 4 years ago from Virginia Beach, Va

As usual, your humor is great and your hub is good info. to remember. Vote up and useful!


kenneth avery profile image

kenneth avery 4 years ago from Hamilton, Alabama Author

Hi, dinkan,

thank you kindly for your supportive words. I do my best to benefit my followers on Hubs. YOU are the ones who count. Not me. And yes, I have been in a hospital for 10 days with a ruptured appendix . . .I will spare you the details. I will say that the hospital I stayed in, didn't fully-grasp what leaving a patient with an open surgical wound in a regular room isnt good for recovery. But thank God I lived.

And I thank you again for taking time to read my works. Have a great Memorial Day!

Kenneth


kenneth avery profile image

kenneth avery 4 years ago from Hamilton, Alabama Author

Hello darling shea,

Glad to see you again, and thank you for your sweet remarks. I did stay 10 days in a hospital for a ruptured appendix and it was not the most pleasant time in my life, but thanks to God and His mercy, I lived. Thanks again for being so loyal and nice to me. I treasure ALL of my followers.

Kenneth


kenneth avery profile image

kenneth avery 4 years ago from Hamilton, Alabama Author

Hello, Giselle,

I have to agree with you on the noisy kids thing. Parents "can" control their kids if they want to. But they have to think first of someone besides themselves. And in your case with being on in the maternity ward, I can imagine how much this chewed up your nerves.

And Giselle, "I" would have been glad to entertain you with one of my many comedy routines, but now I remember that I am only a "Hospital Waiting Room Entertainer," maybe I can take more classes, huh?

Thanks again!

Kenneth


kenneth avery profile image

kenneth avery 4 years ago from Hamilton, Alabama Author

Hi, RunAbstract . . .nice to meet you and thank YOU so much for your encouraging words. I appreciate your thoughts and votes so much. I wish for you, the happiest, safest day possible. Come back and visit me often. There's always some hot coffee on the stove.

Kenneth


kenneth avery profile image

kenneth avery 4 years ago from Hamilton, Alabama Author

Dearest catgypsy,

"Thank you, DEAR friend, for your sweet comments. I savor what you say and take it to heart. I need all the advice I can get."

Maybe one person who is about to visit someone in a hospital will read this hub before they go.

Have a Great day, catgypsy!

Kenneth


kenneth avery profile image

kenneth avery 4 years ago from Hamilton, Alabama Author

Hello, picklesandrufus,

Thank you for your very-kind remarks. And to be honest, over the course of my life, I have actually witnessed some of these infractions in a few hospitals I was in visiting people I knew. And their insensitivity made it hard on nurses, visitors and especially the patients.

Have a great day and visit me often.

Kenneth

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