An Unlikely Romance: An Older Woman's Story of Love With a Younger Man
40 and Counting
On the occasion of his 40th birthday, I thought it was high time I introduced my readers to Anthony, my best half. While his beard shows signs of gray and the hair on his head has seen more luxurious days, his countenance is one of perfection to this, still hopelessly enamored, older woman. Our 13 year difference in age has been troublesome to some at times, but to the two of us, it has meant little, if nothing. But it has been quite a ride for us, and I mean to share some small snippet of this fantastic story here intending to show that the 'impossible' is not always so.
OMG, Watch Em Fly!
One year after studying language and medical delivery systems at the University of the Pacific and in the People's Republic of China, I met and became engaged to a man in Southern California. He was an up and coming executive who worked with troubled youth in his community. My family couldn't have been happier with my choice, and we were to be married in Orange County's Crystal Cathedral. I arranged for doves to be released upon the completion of our vows-drama all around.
Looking back, I realize that this pending wedding had more to do with familial approval than personal desire, for I was not in love with the man. But, carried away by the grand plans, I continued to fool myself into thinking this was what I wanted, so all went according to plan-that is, until I met one of his 'charges.'
Enter Anthony...In a Sense
When I first laid eyes on Anthony, it was far from love at first sight. Here I was, a 33 year old engaged woman, he, a 16 year old kid with a stunning array of pimples on his still childlike face. My fiancé at the time was intent that this young boy and I get to know one another, since he prided himself on helping such wayward boys-my feminine perspective was what he wished for the child. I had rented a townhouse in Torrance, California, in preparation for the nuptials. My fiancé suggested that Anthony move into the spare bedroom since he had no home. And so, the boy moved in to my domicile, and we began to get to know one another.
Ahh, My True Love...
And So It Went...
I don't recall when it happened exactly, but I found myself falling in love with a boy. Now, close quarters can encourage the oddest of alliances, but in our case, it was something more. In retrospect, I see it as the perfect symbol of 'Camelot,' however at the time, it was both illegal and untoward for a woman my age to display love for such a young thing. We continued to grow as platonic friends as my engagement fell to pieces. My fiancé was nonplussed, and within a year, Anthony and I hoofed it to the California's Central Valley, where I became his legal guardian.
One More Year
We were the very best of friends, and I can't tell you how difficult it was to remain 'just pals.' He was 17 by then, and I am certain that his hormones were in overdrive. I must say that this was a true test of our friendship, and we managed to maintain a platonic relationship with one another. To some extent. Ours was an intensely insinuative relationship, full of teasing and play...
Our Wedding Picture
...which remained that way until January 29, 1988, when Anthony and I married. He had been 18 just shy of 2 months, but it was time for the torture to end. And it did, indeed! Within a year, we became the proud parents of a little boy. Anthony and I were an oddly matched duo, often met with questioning looks, but lovers and parents nonetheless.
This Hub is not meant to encourage such age discrepancy. However, I hope to show that the most unlikely pairings can become successful relationships. We have been married now for 28 years, met with many obstacles, and yet are still the best of friends. My 'troubled youth' has become a successful and earnest man whose humor and love has kept our relationship thriving.
I write here, today, for my love.
More by this Author
Why, and certainly when, do we as human beings choose to put our pets 'to sleep?' There are many individual instances and situations one must keep in mind when considering such a decision. There has been much discussion...
To some, this may be a presumptuous move, but I would like to dedicate this piece to a woman who has written her heart out and in turn, touched mine. Her name is Anne Lamott, and her books, "Bird by Bird,"...
This piece conveys the angst and curiosity faced by a woman beset with unusual physical pain. She learns later that she needs total hip replacement surgery.