Bestfriends = Backstabber

I learned pretty quickly that you have to be careful to whom you give your trust.

Bestfriends is such a sweet and fragile 11-letter word. But once scratched, it turns into an ugly 11-letter word Backstabber. Friendship is a beautiful way of growing memories into our life and keeping treasures in a form of friends.

But sometimes, along the way, we will encounter jealousy and treachery smashing the walls of good friendship into evil intentions.

Experience taught me not to give your full trust no matter how you love or how deep your friendship is.

Nobody can keep a secret. Secrets are made to be found out. Remember that our best best friends can be our worst enemy since they all knew the inside and outside of our closet.

But I’m not talking about spilling secrets here. It’s much more than that. Have you ever felt the worst feeling in your life when you talked to a person whom you thought to be your so-called trusted friend and that person pretends that nothing is happening?

When you already knew that she’s the one stabbing you with a knife every time you turned back? When you knew that she’s the one spilling all the skeletons you’re hiding in your closet even when there are no skeletons there?

When you knew she’s the one stalking you and keeping all your moves into a journal?

Scary huh? And she’s there with you, talking, laughing at your jokes as if there’s nothing wrong – acting innocently and making you feel that she can be trusted.


Looking into the remnants of your past, you feel sorry for the friendship you have built with and not knowing one tweak of jealousy will make that person turn against you.

Just by looking at her face makes you want to scream and ask why.

Sometimes you will try to understand the reason why but when you looked at the mirror, you will see the person ruined and bruised by friends.

You will see a person everybody laughed at and talked about just because you have given your full trust to a wrong person – a person who makes fun of using other people so that she could be on the spotlight.

There are a lot of people around us that pretend to be good and nice towards you but in the end you’ll know that she’s the one who brings misery and sorrows into your life.

You later realized that she’s not the person you thought she was.

Trust, when broken is like a crumpled piece of paper. It can be stretched out once again but you will always see the marks, always there to remind us that something has happened and will never be forgotten.

Well, that’s only my point of view, which experience shared with me.

Until now when I looked back at the past and remember every bit of betrayal, I feel sorry for that person, trying to ruin someone’s life just to be noticed. No one found out the truth, and I will always remain a ‘bad person’ to people who knew.

I did not explain myself, for I knew the people who really knows and loves me wouldn’t care. And that’s all matters, for now.

I don’t know about yours or anybody else. Maybe not all people will turn into a backstabbing monster once jealousy enters the pictures. It’s not that I’m heartless kind of person, actually, if I could give a friend much more, I would but everything had changed since trust for friends have been broken. I just learned to use my heart less.

And for me, I’ve learned the puzzle of friendship in a very hard and painful way.


"No matter how much goodness you've done to them, still they will hurt you."


© 2012 Mycee. All Rights Reserved.

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Comments 43 comments

vparker profile image

vparker 4 years ago from From Mars

Backstabbers happen because we except things of people, and we feel hurt when they do not meet our expectations of who we thought they were. Everyone wants to be liked and adored, and many of us want to be successful. Backstabbers are just more cut throat in their approaches. I now create boundaries for myself ,and I know have identified characteristics these fake people have so I can now avoid them.


Rosalinem profile image

Rosalinem 4 years ago from Nairobi, Kenya

I agree with you, its just sad when the person you believe will stand with you joins with others to pull you down. Well written voted it up


thisiknow profile image

thisiknow 4 years ago from Ontario, Canada

It's a long, sad day when the friend you trusted more than anyone else turns out to be your worst enemy. I think everyone experiences that to some degree within their lifetime. All you can do is pick yourself up and move forward.


unknown spy profile image

unknown spy 4 years ago from Neverland - where children never grow up. Author

Thanks thisiknow. I bet you're right, what's left to do is move forward and learned from our mistakes.


unknown spy profile image

unknown spy 4 years ago from Neverland - where children never grow up. Author

Thank you vparker.. i wish i could learn how to identify who have fake smiles when you see them.


unknown spy profile image

unknown spy 4 years ago from Neverland - where children never grow up. Author

thankz rosalinem.. so sad and disappointing :(


kevinbrown55 4 years ago

This hub really means a lot to me. It seems like the more friends I make, the closer I get to them, the more frequently I have to walk away with a broken heart. Great work capturing the brutal definition of a backstabber. Voted up.


unknown spy profile image

unknown spy 4 years ago from Neverland - where children never grow up. Author

Thank you kevin for liking this one. such a painful experience for me though, i rarely trust somebody and i still chose the wrong one! ;O


kevinbrown55 4 years ago

Yes, I know. I can't seem to help myself. I'm an outgoing person and I love meeting new people. The problem is I tend to get too close way too fast. Consequently, I walk away with my head down and my heart shattered. I guess you can call it tears of a tiger.


unknown spy profile image

unknown spy 4 years ago from Neverland - where children never grow up. Author

just be careful in trusting people.. i've learned so much when the people i least expect to betray me were the one who started the fire.even worst when they can still smile at you as if nothing's wrong.but sometime's i cant think of any reasons when they have everything while you have nothing and yet, they still want you down.


ptosis profile image

ptosis 4 years ago from Arizona

Yeah, when get older and more jaded it get even tougher to open up to anybody because of past experience. Like Moulder said to Scully on the X-files, "TrustN01, not even santa claus..."


unknown spy profile image

unknown spy 4 years ago from Neverland - where children never grow up. Author

love the line.. "TrustN01, not even santa claus..."

Thanks ptosis :))


Dia Jacobs profile image

Dia Jacobs 4 years ago

I could relate to this a lot. I used to have a close friend and jealousy broke us a part, making her one of the worst friends I ever met. Its true what you said, some people just end up to be a backstabbing monster after sometime. I don't really know if I'm able to give the same trust to anyone else again.


unknown spy profile image

unknown spy 4 years ago from Neverland - where children never grow up. Author

Hi Dia. It's is soooo sad when the friendship you've built from the start is ruined by this green-eyed monster, jealousy. on my part, i gave her a second chance but nonetheless, it was wasted again. i was betrayed for the second time around. so i guess, this is it. i could never ever trust that person again. i think she's just jealous, but to what? she got more than i've got..she's way way ahead of me. but yet it happened. im going to find out what's on me that worth envying..if theres one. :)

Thank you for reading!


Dia Jacobs profile image

Dia Jacobs 4 years ago

Hahah. Yeah that's true. At times we don't even know what is there to envy about. Same situation as me, she has everything in my eyes, shouldn't it be me who's supposed to envy her? End of the day, I guess we have to much to credit for, and that's why jealousy is in their heart!;)


unknown spy profile image

unknown spy 4 years ago from Neverland - where children never grow up. Author

Yeah!! I couldn't agree more. Honestly, I've been jealous of others too, but I really cannot afford to do the betrayal thing because of that especially to the person you know that trusted you and treated you like her own family. Im thinking because, its their life and instead of wasting my time betraying other people, why don't i change my life for the better?.. well, maybe i'm a little flattered because, think of it, she was jealous of me!! and that means, i have something more in my life that what i just see in myself. :) Thanks Dia for the comment!


Krowie profile image

Krowie 4 years ago from Phils.

Used to have a best friend like that.. It happened a long time ago but the wound she left still bleeds. Voted up and awesome.


tobusiness profile image

tobusiness 4 years ago from Bedfordshire, U.K

Yes it's very hard when you give your trust only to be deceived, but it is part of growing older and wiser. The pain eases with time, and you get just a little bit wiser. well written hub, I love the analogy with the crumple piece of paper. Voting up.


unknown spy profile image

unknown spy 4 years ago from Neverland - where children never grow up. Author

Krowie and Tobusiness, thank you for the comment. Yes, the pain will somehow ease with time and i'm hoping that we can still forgive and forget the past when that time comes. nothing in this life is permanent, things changes and so do we. people change. maybe on that time, they also learned from their mistakes. well, maybe i think its because we're still young and carefree.we don't take things too seriously. time will heal all heartaches. hopefullt even the scar will eventually fade.


rahul0324 profile image

rahul0324 4 years ago from Gurgaon, India

You Unknown seem to have traveled all the crooked and thorny roads possible and come out as a very holistic person with strong sense of judgement and precision!

Hat's off to that!

I myself have met, trusted and been betrayed by I do not know how many people! In a way... I feel good about it today, It improved me as a person... I lost my gullibility and am stronger now...

A quality Hub Indeed!!

Shared all over :)


unknown spy profile image

unknown spy 4 years ago from Neverland - where children never grow up. Author

Rahul dear, im so glad to read your comment. Honestly, i'm still smiling while writing this response to you.

We are much the same, being stronger now after all those unexpected happenings in the past. Well, they say time heals all wounds.. scars may fade away. But i know one thing for sure, we will always remember the lessons we learned from that experience.

PS: Thank you for sharing! :)


jeyaramd profile image

jeyaramd 4 years ago from Mississauga, Ontario

Personally, I think that its hard to expect people to keep things to themselves. Its human nature for people to feel that they need to share information. For instance, when you share information with someone; its probably due to the fact that you need to vent or share your grief, frustration, disappointment, secrets with another. That same tendency may go to your friend who may feel that they need a second opinion.

Of course, like you mentioned, there are those that act on their emotions of jealousy and frustration against your success or other posititve traits. That is unfortunate. We cannot always expect our friends to have our best interest at heart. Hey, that why we have wonderful mothers and fathers to always have our interest. Its normal also for people to compare their life situation with your and feel some tension and frustration. Its not personally against you; but its a weakness within themselves.

Also, to a certain extent, we are to blame to expect confidentiality from friends when we should be talking to school counsellors or professionals, or doctors, about our problems. They will be in a better positiion to provide advice. Also, there are countless support groups and forums in the internet as well. That will ensure that people will provide good advice without having to worry about disclosure.

Try taking people for who they are and listen to their problems.and accept the fact that you know information only because you are their friend. And be respectful to their confidentiality. Perhaps you may no infomration about person A because you have relationship with person B. Be respectul and let person B know that you should not be sharing that info about person A as they may not appreciate it. And, no matter what, when you hear things through others; you will never get the full story. You literally need all the pieces to make a proper assessment of what is right and wrong. Anyhow, this was a great hub. Voted up.


unknown spy profile image

unknown spy 4 years ago from Neverland - where children never grow up. Author

Your comment is very much appreciated.Thank you for this Jeyaramd.

Yes, I agree that it's hard to expect that people will keep things to themselves. We also need to vent things out to other people. I always exerienced people venting out worst secrets of others. And I feel bad, honestly. I feel sorry for the person someone talked behind his back, not because I've learned their worst secrets but knowing that they trusted that person.

Friends have insecurities too.It's normal for human being to feel insecure. But its not right that they keep betraying you again and again and pretend nothings wrong. what kind of friend is that?

Definitely, we need professionals to seek help especially if its very confidential and we really need help.

But the point is, if you havent said a word, if you didnt share and they make up stories about you, whoah..its kinda frustrating.


Krowie profile image

Krowie 4 years ago from Phils.

We have different stories..different friends. It's not right when someone betrays you when you didnt even know at the first place what you have done. If s/he or he cannot keep his mouth shut with the things arent true, then please stay away for you might be ruining someone else's life and heart.


unknown spy profile image

unknown spy 4 years ago from Neverland - where children never grow up. Author

Krowie..have you experienced this one too?.. just asking.. Anyway, thank you for the comment. Its not really right but we dont control the thoughts of others. I trust people and friends close to me but not that much anymore.


Lot Rillera profile image

Lot Rillera 4 years ago from Philippines

i also have that kind of friend way back unknown spy , what I did , i just dont mind what she did even she hurts me, but things can never be the fix again once its broken.


unknown spy profile image

unknown spy 4 years ago from Neverland - where children never grow up. Author

It really hurts when someone make up stories about you that could hurt you and your family. But i love that friend so much that i forgave her the second time around. I even helped her, expecting things would change. Then another betrayal.. It's too much. I agree, once its broken, it can never be fixed again.


snowdrops profile image

snowdrops 4 years ago from The Second Star to the Right

Good job Spy! I hope you already moved on from what happened in the past.


unknown spy profile image

unknown spy 4 years ago from Neverland - where children never grow up. Author

As always, I say Thank You very much.


snowdrops profile image

snowdrops 4 years ago from The Second Star to the Right

Yeah you're right.. Bestfriends = Backstabber

(both 11 letters) :)


unknown spy profile image

unknown spy 4 years ago from Neverland - where children never grow up. Author

LOL!


Karl Harris 4 years ago

What a backstabber friend you have! Im not perfect one but im not into stabbing someone's back. Goodluck unknown


unknown spy profile image

unknown spy 4 years ago from Neverland - where children never grow up. Author

Hi karl..sad to say it happens.. thanks for the goodlucks!


Janhorner 4 years ago

It is always sad when you find out someone you thought was your true friend is not a friend at all. I loathe back stabbers. I always say what comes round goes around and the back stabbers will eventually pay for their betrayal in some way or another.

Once trust has become tarnished it can never be pure again.

Jan


unknown spy profile image

unknown spy 4 years ago from Neverland - where children never grow up. Author

Hi Jan, thanks much! Yes, is was very very sad, knowing that you almost shared your life with them. I managed to give a second chance, and this time, i was stabbed on the front. that's where the turning point of my life, i never trusted anyone anymore.


Janhorner 4 years ago

I have come to that point as well in my work place. It's almost as if people thrive on seeing someone being hurt. I will never understand. I always try to help people and live by my late mother's rule; "If you don't have anything nice to say about someone, don't say anything at all." Good way of thinking . I don't know what it is but people were far more nicer to each other years ago. I keep myself to myself at work best way. Sorry someone has been so rotten to you not just once but twice!

Jan


unknown spy profile image

unknown spy 4 years ago from Neverland - where children never grow up. Author

Hi Jan. Yeah, i think not just twice. We've been friends for years..and for years, she's been doing that to me. I just dont get it, why? I even walked on the hallways and streets without a head.

If only people would live to that rule, i think it could lessen the hurts and pains and broken hearts.. Maybe its because of jealousy, personal reasons..any reasons they have. That's why im just being careful nowadays..

Thank you Jan!


Janhorner 4 years ago

You are welcome. Know what it's nice that you and me are not like that and, we can rise above such childish behaviour. Sad people are the back stabbers! Do what I do and put them on a boat and watch them drift along the water away from you. It's surprising how it works!

Jan


unknown spy profile image

unknown spy 4 years ago from Neverland - where children never grow up. Author

Wow, yeah..it's very nice Jan. And to avoid revivals, I must really put the rule on my head. "If you don't have anything nice to say about someone, don't say anything at all."

It's very true and very effective to avoid backstabbing other persons. anyway, they have their own lives to managed, own decisions to make, right.


ishwaryaa22 profile image

ishwaryaa22 4 years ago from Chennai, India

A very well-written hub! I totally agree with you as the same incident also have happened to me. That day, I discovered the dark side of the former friend, I was totally shattered but managed to pick myself up and moved on. I still have fewest other long-time good friends and a caring family. It is all part of life and life is like a lesson for all of us. You presented your hub in a convincing manner. Thanks for sharing. Well-done!


unknown spy profile image

unknown spy 4 years ago from Neverland - where children never grow up. Author

I can feel your pain that time Ish..the pain of totally shattered person. It's part of our life really and somehow, thru those pains, we can gain a lesson for life.


cleaner3 profile image

cleaner3 4 years ago from Pueblo, Colorado

spy, I don't know why I picked this write of yours to look at but it drew me in. when I was young we called these kind of people two-face. your trust is special and when you find out that it was betrayed it hurts just like having your heart broken. when you fall in love, you trust someone with your heart and when your trust is betrayed your heart is broken, I know this feeling for i write about it n most of my poetry. All you can do move on live your life. great write spy, it comes from your heart , which I can tell is a sweet fragile flower.!!


unknown spy profile image

unknown spy 4 years ago from Neverland - where children never grow up. Author

Hi Michael..yeah you're right.. we always meet them, but some people did an extra care avoiding such consequences in the end. thank you Michael for the uplifting message! You're so kind.

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