Bizarre Things Men Do That Girls Find Sexy
"By George, this one's going to be good!"
A personal revelation
and one that I thought that I would never hear myself say: "What is the world coming to?" When I was an unlearned teenager, my buddies and I would cruise around town, hang at our local fast-food joints and poke fun at people (my age now) for kicks.
If there is anything to karma, (no reference to John Lennon's "Instant Karma") then I have been bitten in the behind by what I found out about the women of 2016. If you are a well-grounded guy, you best turn to another hub because I can promise you that by you reading this piece, you will be suddenly hit with fear and then a bad case of insecurity.
And if you choose to stay, you have been warned.
of an obviously-stealthy study by social experts that I ran across blew my mind (1960's phrase). I am not kidding. I thought I had stumbled upon a (far out, another 1960's phrase) website that was being used as a clever front for some overseas terrorist organization, but that hope was soon dashed as I read the entire content of this study that (some) people with Ph.d's did on
Falling down - - a flight of stairs, off a building or wild horse or just stumbling on his feet. This is one of those really bizarre things this study said that women of 2016 find very sexy. Note: I wish I had known this when I was a teenager.
Mowing the lawn - - or most manual work is a great afrodesiac. So using this as a lytmus test, the hard-working loggers of the Pacific Coast are true "ladies men" with chainsaws in their hands.
Other manual labor that is reported to be sexy to women
- Lifting heavy objects such as furniture, front ends of cars when the guy's girlfriend's little puppy innocently runs beneath it.
- Being able to talk clearly and chew their food at the same time. Note: This one "is" manual labor for some guys.
- Splitting firewood.
- Bending horseshoes with their bare hands.
Using the vacuum cleaner - - to clean their girlfriend's apartment or the house where he and his wife reside. And the topper is, these guys are all men and did this chore without being hounded by their female companions.
Going on a date - - without shaving. This one to me is understandable. The first few days when my wife saw my manicured beard she remarked, "you do not look like the guy that I married." I would call that a confession of her being turned on by yours truly.
Getting beaten up - - by a gang or some old childhood nemesis. At first I said no way when I read this one. But later in the article I found out that when females see a male being beaten up or even blood pouring out of his mouth like a stuck hog (rural term), their maternal instincts kick in and they are actually wanting to run to this poor guy's rescue and hold him in their arms. Note: again, I wish I had known this in my single days.
Shaving before going to work - - was more of a secret confession by a small percentage of girls interviewed in this article.
Wearing trashy clothing - - that most hobo's would turn down is another one that I understood by reading more about it. Things like this that guys sometimes do brings out the sympathy in women and that (want) to coddle the poor guy for showing up in torn jeans happens a lot of the time.
Dropping a tray of drinks - - when serving at a cocktail party. I give you my word. I cannot begin to understand this one. How can being clumsy be a turn-on for some girls? Would any woman of 2016 who might be reading this, please tell me why a (some) females love a clumsy guy. Notice: I did not mention Jerry Van Dyke at all.
Guys, if you have read this piece (in shock) as I did when I first discovered these things that "we" all do, but never knew that they made females want us, then did you catch the overall-yet-secret revelation that I did in most of these thing we do that women call sexy?
If you didn't, then let me just share this: I found (and saw) in most of these points that they are complete opposites to us who try to look good, clean, and not repulsive to our female companions. My point: So can we all agree that by us striving to look and be clean can also be considered a huge turn-on for females as well?
I rest my case.
Good night, Tucson, Arizona.
© 2016 Kenneth Avery
More by this Author
You read my headline right. Tractors. In our "Free-for-all," tolerant society, driving a farm tractor on a date is . . .hey, I am not giving it away.
Females are one of God's finest works. They are fun, charming, great to look at, but that eye rolling is just a bit much.
At Christmas, how we open our gifts can say a lot about us.