Me...Photo by Stephan
Me...Photo by Stephan


I'm back...not that I've been away, away. We are still in Florida land, fixing the "Condo with the View", and hating the thought of going back to New Jersey in a few weeks. I think we have fallen in love with North Palm Beach...and the people. It's taken months for us to finally say, this is really our place, a place in the Sun...Not that we bake, NO, not us...we are very PRACTICAL...And who's had time...Not us! So what have I got to talk about? Well for one thing, we have not purchased a TV because we are really on a tight schedule, and no time to watch it anyway...Do I miss it? Certain shows, like Mad Men, and the Good Wife, Blue Bloods, Missing, and Revenge, and so we listen to a lot of radio, and that's where this tale begins...

Last Sunday, after breakfast I am working in the Bedroom and Lover Man is in the Den trying to hang the blinds. Actually, truth be told, I am trying to stay out of his way, for if I'm in the same room he makes mistakes... Men... Anyway, the radio is on, and it's the "Dr. So and So's" show, I won't use his actual name, you'll understand why afterwards. The Doctor is a "Gynecologist" and does Plastic Surgery as well...Some combination. Now the "Host" who's name shall also remain anonymous say's, "Good morning Doctor, before we take calls, I have to tell you, my Daughter told me she really enjoyed meeting you for her FIRST Gynecological visit".

I'm thinking OMG, what is wrong with this "Host" doesn't she realize the World, ok, maybe NOT the world, but the State of Florida, has now just been informed of this...I now picture the daughter at home, Mortified! And I'm sorry to admit, but I'm hysterically laughing as I go running into the living room and crash into Lover Man who is also laughing and saying, "do you believe that woman"! We could picture the girl SCREAMING and wanting to KILL the Mother Host...While all her friends are Texting one another...while the daughter is threatening NEVER to be seen in public again!

Another Funny thing, we're driving in the Car, on one of our "RETURN MISSIONS" probably to "Home Depot" where they actually know our names...having been there SO MANY TIMES, anyway, there is this building with a sign that reads "Connecticut School of Broadcasting" on the front of it. "Mmm, I say to Lover Man, do you think somewhere in Connecticut, there is a building with a sign that reads, "Florida School of Broadcasting"? We both Laugh...we are spending a lot of time together with only one car in Florida land, it's a good thing that we Enjoy each others company, EXCEPT, when we are working on a Project...Then the SPARKS begin...but in the end, we makeup and say, "What was that all about anyway"?

Last Friday night, we went to a "Pizza Party" at the new Condo Club house and got to meet a lot of our neighbors. We had just moved in that day and were hot, and sweaty, but at the last minute we said, what the heck, we've got to eat, and so we went. We wound up talking with a nice couple from Long Island...Also a Second Marriage. She kept saying to me, you look like you're Glowing with Happiness and you make such a striking Couple...I'm thinking as I look at Lover Man...It's pure Sweat...but it's also LOVE, and Marriage, and Florida.

Comments 85 comments

mckbirdbks profile image

mckbirdbks 4 years ago from Emerald Wells, Just off the crossroads,Texas

You always deliver a smile. I understand that it is warming on the east coast, so it may be safe to return to N.J. At least you will always have 'Florida'. I enjoyed your humor as always.

billybuc profile image

billybuc 4 years ago from Olympia, WA

You are a kick; I should have visited more often but somehow I get sidetracked and the best intentions keep slipping by. Loved this hub and your sense of humor. Keep them coming and I'll try to keep up.

thelyricwriter profile image

thelyricwriter 4 years ago from West Virginia

Up, funny, and awesome! B Malin, this was much needed. Always a joy and pleasure. Nothing but smiles here:) Best wishes to you and Loverman.

Rosemay50 profile image

Rosemay50 4 years ago from Hawkes Bay - NewZealand

Couldn't wait till tomorrow to visit like I said i would, needed a good chuckle to end my day. I feel so sorry for that poor daughter, I bet she tore a strips off her mother. Enjoy the rest of your stay, But I know you'll enjoy getting home too when you do.

Becky Katz profile image

Becky Katz 4 years ago from Hereford, AZ

I just hear not to talk to her friends. I can just imagine what my daughter would say over that comment. Funny hub, I am laughing.

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kelleyward 4 years ago

This is a funny way to start the morning. Glad I came across your hubs. Take care, Kelley

Dexter Yarbrough profile image

Dexter Yarbrough 4 years ago from United States

I am so happy you all are having a great time in North Palm Beach! I wonder if they have been able to pull the daughter out from under the bed yet?!

Cheryl Kapelner-Champ 4 years ago

Good for u*2, sounds lovely, & a wonderful time too. Enjoy "The View"~ !

Lol, Cher

always exploring profile image

always exploring 4 years ago from Southern Illinois

I know where to go when i need a good laugh.HaHa I have got to listen to the radio more. It sounds like you're having a good time, lots of laughs. Take care. Keep a pen and pad handy, you never know what you might hear, and we 'wanna know too. Hee

breakfastpop profile image

breakfastpop 4 years ago

Your happiness is contagious. I feel happy too!

WillStarr profile image

WillStarr 4 years ago from Phoenix, Arizona

That's a picture of you? Wow! No wonder 'lover-man' is so loving!


writer20 profile image

writer20 4 years ago from Southern Nevada

Loved you story and thanks for many laughs. Take care driving home.

vote up funny and interesting, Joyce.

50 Caliber profile image

50 Caliber 4 years ago from Arizona

B., funny funny tale, written well and though I'm late posting, I actually read this early and now again, enjoyed it both times,



AliciaC profile image

AliciaC 4 years ago from British Columbia, Canada

Thanks for yet another funny hub, b. Malin. I‘m going to miss your stories about your adventures in Florida, but I’m sure the ones about your future life in New Jersey will be just as interesting! I love your photo - you do look happy!

b. Malin profile image

b. Malin 4 years ago Author

Hi Mckbirdbks, I don't want to go Home...Not that I don't Love NJ...but it's so nice here...But Alas, I shall return, I loved your line, "after all, you'll always have Florida". I'm so glad I made you SMILE!

drbj profile image

drbj 4 years ago from south Florida

I like the look on your face in your new photo, b. It's a sort of 'come hither' look with a 'but watch yourself in the clinches' warning. Laughed at your 'funny things.'

b. Malin profile image

b. Malin 4 years ago Author

Hi Billy, Ditto, Ditto, Ditto, my friend. I'm so glad you Enjoyed my Humor...I too want to get back to Following good Hubs and writers I enjoy. Hopefully now I'll be able to, except for the days when we are traveling back to NJ

b. Malin profile image

b. Malin 4 years ago Author

Hi Lyric, I try to deliver a little Fun, so glad I succeeded. Smile right back to you my Friend, I'll be by to read your latest Hub.

b. Malin profile image

b. Malin 4 years ago Author

Hi Rosemay, So glad I made you Chuckle at the end of your day. That "Host" Mother should have her Head examined for saying all that on national radio...Brain dead Woman!

b. Malin profile image

b. Malin 4 years ago Author

It was Funny Becky, but that "Host" Woman, should have had more sense than to talk about the Daughters 1st personal can you get over National Radio...Flash, Headline, "Daughter KILLS Mother over Radio Comments". All teenage daughters would be smiling!

b. Malin profile image

b. Malin 4 years ago Author

Hi Kelley, I'm so glad you did stop by, and I will visit your Hubs as well...Glad I could start you day with some Fun!

b. Malin profile image

b. Malin 4 years ago Author

!Hi Dexter, I'm LOVING N. Palm Beach and Hate to leave. That poor Daughter is probably living UNDER the bed and taking all her meals there, as she Plots her Revenge to the "Host" Mother!

b. Malin profile image

b. Malin 4 years ago Author

Ah the View Cheryl, makes it all worth while...Lots of tales to tell when I see you. Thanks for stopping by. LOL.

b. Malin profile image

b. Malin 4 years ago Author

Hi Ruby, You girlfriend, always make me Smile when I read your Comments, thanks so much for being a Friend. And Life is lot of Laughs, though sometimes not so funny until late in the Evening...then I go "what the heck"...

b. Malin profile image

b. Malin 4 years ago Author

Hi Breakfastpops, I'm so Glad I made you Happy too, Hey, that's what Friends are for. I'll be by to visit as well. I really missed not being able to catch up with everyone.

b. Malin profile image

b. Malin 4 years ago Author

Yeah, that Me in the Flesh WillStarr...I usually HATE pictures, but I though, what am I going to use for this Hub...then I said to Lover Man, should I use this one that was taken last month...He said "Hell yes"! And so that's ME!

b. Malin profile image

b. Malin 4 years ago Author

Hi Writer, I'm so glad you enjoyed and had a few good laughs. Don't wanna come home, but, I will. Actually the Car...that 10 year old car's "Computer" is keeping the Engine light on...Mmmm that could be another HUB! Thanks for the Votes Joyce.

b. Malin profile image

b. Malin 4 years ago Author

Hi Dusty, I always Enjoy hearing from you, and of course your Comments...So Glad you Enjoyed the read Twice...Thank you!

b. Malin profile image

b. Malin 4 years ago Author

Hi Alicia, I'm so going to miss Florida...and if the car holds out, will make it back to NJ...The Engine light has been staying on...Maybe the Car likes it better in Florida! Ha, Ha. My photo is of me at a Happy moment...a few weeks back, so Thank YOU!

b. Malin profile image

b. Malin 4 years ago Author

Hi Drbj, You've got me pegged... I'm giving Lover Man that "Come hither Stare"...Glad my Hub gave you a Good Laugh!

Movie Master profile image

Movie Master 4 years ago from United Kingdom

It sounds as though all is well in the Malin household and the condo with a view and that's great news!

How wonderful to see this fantastic photo of you!

A big vote up from me, best wishes to you both!

Denise Handlon profile image

Denise Handlon 4 years ago from North Carolina

Gorgeous photo there of you, btw! Oh my-I don't know what to comment on first-the humor, which is ALWAYS appreciated; the update about the condo remodeling-also appreciated; or the fact that I am insanely jealous that you HAVE the Lover Man...oops, I mean CONDO, down there in Florida, LOL

Great write-enjoyed and voted up/funny/interesting.

b. Malin profile image

b. Malin 4 years ago Author

Hi Movie Master, Life is Good, working hard on the Condo, and it is finally looking like us! I'm not a picture person, but this one turned out ok, so I decided to use it for this Hub. Thanks so much for your best wishes, and of course your Vote!

Nellieanna profile image

Nellieanna 4 years ago from TEXAS

Bee Malin - (sorry - I couldn't resist it!) I can't imagine how I've managed to miss your fun writing! There's something about it that is like Erma Bombeck - not at all the SAME, but it has that appealing, warm, somehow familiar quality even if I've never even BEEN to New Jersey and only to Florida once on a holiday.

Your writing leaves a good taste in my mouth!

I feel like I know you and your Lover Man somehow and I could actually visualize the project at hand and your trips to Home Depot till they knew you by name. (Is his Stephen, aka: the photographer?)

I'm a fan, for sure! You've a sassy look about you, btw! :-)


b. Malin profile image

b. Malin 4 years ago Author

Thanks Denise, I think...Ha, Ha! I'm so glad you Enjoyed the Humor, and I'll tell Lover Man he is appreciated...He's the Man! We've worked really hard on the Condo to make it us... and now it is... and we have to leave it soon...which will be hard to do. Thanks for the fun Comments and of course your Votes!

b. Malin profile image

b. Malin 4 years ago Author

Hi Nelleanna, you are Funny. Thanks for the Compliment, I always liked Erma Bombeck, who left us much to soon...Of course I'd like to think there's a little of Erica Jong in me too...Maybe that's the Sassy look I have in this picture!

Lover Man and I are a pair...give us a project like working on the Condo, and we KILL each other, yet we are best friends and Lovers and in the end we always make up.

I actually did the photo on my "Mac" in photo both with Lover Man looking on. Stephan normally takes most of the pictures I use. I'll be by to visit your Hubs as well.

Genna East profile image

Genna East 4 years ago from Massachusetts, USA

“Actually, truth be told, I am trying to stay out of his way, for if I'm in the same room he makes mistakes... Men...” Lol…that is so funny.

Wonderful anecdotes, B. I really enjoyed this; thanks for the laughter and smiles; happiness is contagious!

By the way, your photo – you look so much like friend of mine; I had to take a second look! Up +.

b. Malin profile image

b. Malin 4 years ago Author

Hi Genna, Men...Can't live with them (at Project time) can't live without them, most of the time! I'm so glad I could make you Laugh and Smile.

Mmm, I'm going to take that as a Compliment. I hate pictures, but needed something for the Hub, so I thought...It's not terrible...I'll use it.

Flora Breen Robison 4 years ago

Hi! I saw your post on FB that you had written another hub, but I didn't get a chance to read it until now. I've been busy a lot too.

Yes indeed, some things should be kept private in the family. Happy Mother's Day will not be quite the case this year in that household, hmmm?

I love classic movies but can't afford to buy them, so I watch a lot of Turner Classic Movies-when I have time. I also like PBS. Sitting down in front of the TV gives me something to do while my cat sits on my lap and doesn't let me move.

Just Ask Susan profile image

Just Ask Susan 4 years ago from Ontario, Canada

Always love reading what you've been up to in Florida or New Jersey. I might be going to Florida next month to drive back to Ontario with my mother in law. I usually go in August or September and find it way too hot. Hopefully June will be a bit cooler.

I like that you added a picture of yourself to this hub. Nice to see what you look like.

Nell Rose profile image

Nell Rose 4 years ago from England

Hi, love the photo! nice to to see you at last! lol! that radio comment made me cringe too! how embarrassing! I like your stories and they always make me laugh! voted up!

b. Malin profile image

b. Malin 4 years ago Author

Hi Flora, I'm still trying to play Catch up...for I'm heading back to NJ next Monday, and still so much to do. I too will have more time to check out your writings, as well as other Hubbers.

Yes, I wonder what the Girl gave her Mother for "Mother's Day"...maybe some TAPE for her Big Mouth!

"Classic Turner Movies are the Best. Give the Cat a pat for me too.

b. Malin profile image

b. Malin 4 years ago Author

Hi Susan, I'm heading back to NJ next week...I hate to leave, but we may come back down in August with some things for the Condo. We get great breezes from the Inter Costal...hoping it will be like that in August.

Yes, that's me last month...took a lot of nerve on my part to put it on this Hub...for I usual don't like pictures of myself.

b. Malin profile image

b. Malin 4 years ago Author

Hi Nell, Thanks, I'm not a picture person, so I'm glad you liked it.

Wasn't that Mother the "Pits", I mean RADIO, everyone could hear...what was she thinking...NOT! Anyway, I'm so glad you Enjoyed, and of course "Thank You" for the Vote!

BobbiRant profile image

BobbiRant 4 years ago from New York

LOL I love radio, I listen to Bob and Tom. Do they count? I like the idea they have a handle on this crazy world and they say it like it is. Great hub, as usual, and a very fun read. Love it!

chspublish profile image

chspublish 4 years ago from Ireland

Hi bMalin, I do love your humor - you say so much in such a contained way. Your photo looks good also.

The stories you weave on 'what you know' are full of inspiring entertainment, yet leave lasting impressions. Good for you!

b. Malin profile image

b. Malin 4 years ago Author

Hi Bobbi, Talk Radio is the Best, except when this "crazy lady" and the Doctor were on...I'm glad you Enjoyed My Humor, it means a lot, Hub Writer!

b. Malin profile image

b. Malin 4 years ago Author

Hi Chspublish, Thank You! The photo is actually growing on me now...usually HATE pictures of myself.

I guess I can tell a mean tale...but I also hope my Humor comes through Loud and Clear! I'm so glad you Enjoyed!

alocsin profile image

alocsin 4 years ago from Orange County, CA

I enjoy reading your amusing tales as a way to end the day. And congrats on finally getting moved in. Voting this Up and Interesting.

barbergirl28 profile image

barbergirl28 4 years ago from Hemet, Ca

I would be so mortified if I was that daughter... OMG - I can't believe anybody would announce that on the radio. Funny story and glad you are enjoying life in Florida! :)

b. Malin profile image

b. Malin 4 years ago Author

Hi Alocsin, I'm so glad you Enjoy my amusing tales, and that I gave you a Smile at the end of your day! Haven't stopped WORKING on the place since we moved in, but it's worth it! Thanks for the Votes, they are Appreciated.

b. Malin profile image

b. Malin 4 years ago Author

Hi Barbergirl, Right...what a CRAZY MOTHER...and she said it all so calmly over the Radio...What was she thinking...Mortified, Mortified one Daughter at home!

Love Florida, and hate to leave...Thanks for Enjoying my Hub!

PegCole17 profile image

PegCole17 4 years ago from Dallas, Texas

Hi B.Malin, You lifted my spirits when I read your hub this morning. What a gift to see humor in the most ordinary things like a sign on a building or the goof up of an exuberant Mom with loose lips. You know, they sink ships. The GYN comment brought back a funny memory from long ago too! Thanks for the memories. And BTW what an awesome photo of you. Now I can picture you as more than a statue! hahah. Is that you? Statue?

Scribenet profile image

Scribenet 4 years ago from Ontario, Canada

I often listen to radio if I am doing time I will have a pen ready...because the comments can get hilarious! That has to be one of the worst/funniest gafs!

Enjoyed your comment that men make mistakes if we are in the should make a Hub on that...I can see how many ways that could

Congratulations on the new condo and!

Happyboomernurse profile image

Happyboomernurse 4 years ago from South Carolina

Thanks for a good laugh and I must say you do look glowingly happy and in love in the photo that Stephan took.

Hub Hugs,


b. Malin profile image

b. Malin 4 years ago Author

Hi Peg Cole, I think we could all tell a Funny story about a GYN visit...I remember one where I vowed NEVER TO WEAR HIGH HEELS AGAIN...He had me keep them on! Thanks for liking my Picture, since I usually HATE them, but I guess this one's ok. Hey, I should be so Lucky... NO, the Statue is not me. You are Funny!

b. Malin profile image

b. Malin 4 years ago Author

Hi Scribenet, I know, Lover Man and I couldn't believe what we were hearing...You gotta Love that Woman...Ha, Ha.

I could write a BOOK on Lover Man and I, and Home "Projects"...we don't play nicely. Heading back to NJ now that the Condo is finished...We will miss this place. Thanks for you Congratulations, we appreciate them.

b. Malin profile image

b. Malin 4 years ago Author

Hi Gail, so glad you Enjoyed! Thanks, I'll tell the Man you liked his talents...Hugs right back to you...and we're heading back to NJ.

Dim Flaxenwick profile image

Dim Flaxenwick 4 years ago from Great Britain

´glowing with happiness....´

Nah! Just sweat.

Really my sense of humour. This was great.

b. Malin profile image

b. Malin 4 years ago Author

Hi Dim, No you're's probably a little of Both! You've got a Great sense of Humor, and I will Enjoy Following your Hubs too! I'm so glad you Enjoyed this Hub of mine!

Beth100 profile image

Beth100 4 years ago from Canada

:) Love conquers all and you are glowing and your beacon of warmth is everywhere! It's wonderful to hear such positivity, and of course, the laughs.

b. Malin profile image

b. Malin 4 years ago Author

Hi Beth, Thank You so much for your Wonderful Comments...I see so much Humor in our Everyday lives...Laughter is the Best Medicine!

Vellur profile image

Vellur 4 years ago from Dubai

Enjoyed reading your hub.Voted up.

b. Malin profile image

b. Malin 4 years ago Author

Hi Vellur, I get a little Silly every now and then...I'm so GLAD you Enjoyed, and Thank you, of course for your Vote.

katyzzz profile image

katyzzz 4 years ago from Sydney, Australia

Very amusing, loved it, as did all these others here, it seems

b. Malin profile image

b. Malin 4 years ago Author

Hi Katyzzz, Well Thank You! That's my Humor! Now I'm off to look at your Hubs!

Jools99 profile image

Jools99 4 years ago from North-East UK

Very funny! Joan Rivers used to tell a joke about first meeting her gynachologist, "Doctor Smith, at your cervix" and this radio programme is almost as bad! Oh dear, that poor girl won't be able to show her face for a while! And it's great that you and Lover Man laugh at the same things - me and my hubby spend a lot of our time laughing together at life and we watch a lot of comedy which is good for the soul! :o)

b. Malin profile image

b. Malin 4 years ago Author

I just LOVE your Comments Jools...You guys sound like Us! Life is too short to stay unhappy, or Mad...although I have some Family Members who ONLY know how to act that way! My Son's Lady is the BEST, and we both just had a Good Laugh! I'm so glad you Enjoyed!

BRIAN SLATER profile image

BRIAN SLATER 4 years ago from Nottingham Uk

Great way to start my day off by you putting a big smile on my face-voted up and shared. btw I can see why your man doesn't like you in the same room when he's on a project, what man wants to listen to Dr. Gyny in one ear and his other half telling him the curtain rail is not straight in the other lol

b. Malin profile image

b. Malin 4 years ago Author

Very Funny Brian...Lover Man and I get a little Crazy when we have "Projects" to work on. And that Radio Show gave us Both a good Laugh! I'm so Glad, I gave you your First Smile of the Day!

josh3418 profile image

josh3418 4 years ago from Pennsylvania

This was hilarious, great job, I was cracking up on this one, especially the part us making mistakes! We just get nervous sometimes :) It happens, please forgive us :) Great job, voted up and many more and sharing!

b. Malin profile image

b. Malin 4 years ago Author

Thanks Josh, I'm so glad you Enjoyed. You're ok, and I agree, about the Nervous part. Thanks so much for your Comments, and of course your Vote, and Sharing.

josh3418 profile image

josh3418 4 years ago from Pennsylvania

You are very welcome, anytime! :)

Karen Hellier profile image

Karen Hellier 4 years ago from Georgia

This was so cute and funny. Sounds a bit like Erma Bombeck only better because it's about love, not the kid part. I am in the same boat as you in terms of being in a second marriage. Did much better this time and am also having a lot of fun and laughter. Thanks for the great read and the laughs!

b. Malin profile image

b. Malin 4 years ago Author

Hi Karen, yes, Second Time around seems to work...we are quite the pair, to say we Never disagree...We do, but we Fight differently...I'm so glad you Enjoyed. Thank YOU!

tillsontitan profile image

tillsontitan 4 years ago from New York

Well, am I sorry I haven't been here before! This was great, so much humor and honesty, a pleasure to read especially with a smile on my face put there by you!

I can see I'm going to have to follow you around FLA and NJ...I have children living in NJ so who knows...anyway, really enjoyed this hub.

Voted up, funny, and interesting.

b. Malin profile image

b. Malin 4 years ago Author

Hi Tillsontitan, Thank You...I try. This Hub practically wrote its self...Life is Funny, can't make some of this stuff up. Do I dare admit, I miss Florida, both of us do. Thank you so much for all your lovely Comments, and of course your Votes!

moonlake profile image

moonlake 4 years ago from America

You are very funny. Enjoyed this kinda of sounds like our house. My husband is remodeling our living room. He said to me the heating/air vent will be in the middle of the floor until I can get it moved. I soon stepped in it and almost broke my foot. He moved the sofa over the top of the vent and gave me that look!

Voted Up on your hub.

b. Malin profile image

b. Malin 4 years ago Author

Thanks Moonlake, Wow, remodeling the Living Room, we'd probably be Killing one another! We work well on Small projects...However the Condo with the View, was a Big one, and we made it happen, without too many of "those looks"!

Loved your Comments, and Thanks, so much for the Vote!

Docmo profile image

Docmo 4 years ago from UK

Your Fla adventures are a hoot. I love your natural style with that sense of humor and sheer insolence... You and lover man are a delight to read and may we share many adventures with you ! Voted up !

b. Malin profile image

b. Malin 4 years ago Author

Why Thank You Docmo. It's fun to write about the "silly" things in life...where would we be without them? I'm so Glad you Enjoyed, and of course, Thank you for your Vote.

kevins blog52 profile image

kevins blog52 4 years ago from southern Indiana

I enjoyed your hub very much b. Malin I like your style you seem to be a very positive happy person, we need more people like you in the world.

b. Malin profile image

b. Malin 4 years ago Author

Hi Kevins,

Ah, I do have my Moods...But Thank You Kevin, for seeing Me & my Hubs as Positive...I Try, I try. Thanks for your Comments, always Appreciated!

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AudraLeigh 4 years ago

I really like your writing syle and the ability to to put what you would actually say in a conversation in print. And it was put together so well! This was pretty cool and so are you! And Lover Man seems to be too!

ps...where in NJ are you from??

b. Malin profile image

b. Malin 4 years ago Author

Hi Audra, Thank You. Lover Man and I reside in Ventnor. Beach is 8 blocks away and The BAY is around the corner...Most of the time, it's a Cool place to live. Thanks for all the Wonderful Comments.

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